“Papa…” Xichen was quieter during the last few days compared to his usual happy and carefree demeanor. With the passing of his mother still fresh in mind, the eight year old had snuck away from his uncle to check in on his father. The young cultivator knew that sneaking away like this, especially so late into the night, would likely get him a scolding, but his father was his bigger worry for some time now.
Though it didn’t show at first, Lan Huan didn’t need a second glance to see that his father was upset, and his body, clad in pure white to show his mourning, moves long before his mind does. He doesn’t say anything at first, as Xichen goes over to his father and moves so he’s sitting gently in his lap, small arms wrapping as much as he could manage around Qingheng-Jun’s body. His head finds a comfortable position on the older man’s chest, hoping the contact would help bring any form of comfort and peace to his father.
“Papa… It’s ok…” Even his voice is quieter, but still holds the soft benevolence that Xichen had inherited. If he wasn’t ok now, then Xichen would do anything to make sure his dad could smile again. He doesn’t know what to do or what to say quite yet, but anything was better than nothing. Another pause rises so Xichen can glance upwards at his dad, lips finding a pursed position as his still-young mind races to figure out what to do. “Papa… Huan’s here… It’s ok now… So please…”
His whole life Lan QiYi did whatever he felt like was right, even if other people deem it to be wrong he would still do it. He has been like that since he as young. Lan Qiren, his younger brother, had always nag him on that trait of his, but not even he couldn’t stop. It had worked out well for him as Qing Heng-jun had made a name of himself at a very young age. However, things changed when he met his fated person. The moment QiYi saw her he knew she is the one who he wanted to protect. He had risk everything to save her life. Even if she was someone he was suppose to hate. He couldn’t. Not even after she killed his master.
He saved her life yes, but he couldn’t free her. She even gave him two sons and what did he ever give her? Could it even be call a life being cooped up in that cottage? All alone...
There were so many times QiYi wanted to come and visit her, but end up just standing at her door and leaving as soon as the door open. He had been weak and stay one time. After Lan Zhan was born he never visited her again. That is up until her death. In the end he couldn’t give her anything.
Lan QiYi was so deep in thoughts that he didn’t even noticed one of his sons had sneak in. He looked down at his oldest son. One could say both boys looks like their father, but QiYi could see their mother in them, more so with Huan.
He slowly reach up and held his son close to him. QiYi hasn’t held his sons since the day their were born.
“A-Huan...I’m sorry.” He whispered.
‘I’m sorry I am such a useless father to you and your brother.’
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