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YOU ARE THE REASON
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

Love Begins

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@queenofanythingsd
Happy Easter.
nothing last forever but the sound of love astounds me every time that it calls
Here we go dancing on our own inside this house that we have never known never known
Here we go going in alone into the dark and wonderful unknown let us go let us go
Little pink houses || Samra
âYeah there is a reason that guy didnât move in with you hon, heâs a fucking loser, he doesnât deserve a woman like you, you know what? I think he deserves his mom.â he welcomed her hug and held her tight against him. It still wasnât too late to say no, but her warmth, her scent, her childlike demeanor made Sam realize that she needed him as much as he needed her. âSara, kiddo, youâre not a bitch, youâre perfect. Fucking perfect, and this house with the piano and the Japanese curse and a fucking adult water park in the back yard, is perfect too. For us.â Sam gave her a kiss on the forehead and let her go, âNow go do paperwork and all that boring shit, shoo shoo, go.â he shoved her playfully.Â
"Us" she repeated with a smile. A single word, one syllable, but for that moment, it sounded like the most perfect word ever created. If it didnât actually mean to move away from the embrace, she might just take it and write a song about it. But moving away really wasnât in the plans right now. The last 6 months might have been rough, but if anything, it taught her to relish in the small moments, in the now. Because who knew what would happen next? But right now, to paraphrase him, right now was perfect.
"Fine, fine, Iâll go. Jeez, dude! Chill!"Â The woman laughed as he finally let her go. But barely a few steps ahead, she broke out dancing, all limbs flying around everywhere, twirling once in a while. "We're getting a house, huh huh." She chanted.
Look at this pretty baby. Oh i'm going to be very happy here.
Little pink houses || Samra
What was she saying? What the fuck was she insinuating? This could mean anything, she wanted to get the place with a couple friends but needed his approval? Sam looked at her calmly, he tried to decipher her message, he read her body language: pleading. Pleading? She wanted something, her hands held his, her head tilted sideways as she looked at him...him. Thats it! She wanted him. "Wait...sweetie you want me...to live with you? "
Yes.
Yes was the first answer that popped up in his mind, without hesitation his head took the decision for him. The actor almost blushed for a second and looked away and sighed before returning to his girlfriend."I...Really? Its just...shits really complicated honey. I don't sleep and I'm ...you know. And you'll just end up kicking me out- shit man i dont know..." he knew, for her sake, he should say no. For her well being he should say no, but neither of them were going to accept nothing less of a yes.
He was ruining it, all their precious most important moments will always be tinted with his hesitation of going on with his life. "Sara I...would love to fucking move in with you. Let's do this shit." What he meant,and what his face was probably showing, was Im so fucking scared of taking this step I hope I dont screw it up. "We can have a sex room, 'cause fucking five rooms for two people gives way to a sex room."
She was slightly disappointed by his first reaction, yet she couldn't say she was surprised. Sara did understand. That was asking a lot, very soon. Soon in their entire relationship, soon after loosing his fiancĂŠe. It was all too much, probably. Waiting was probably for the best. She was about to pull away when his words brought her back. "You... you would?" the brunette stammered, taken aback.
The idea hit her fully finally. Living together. Every night, every morning. Morning hair, morning breath, fighting for the last shelf in the bathroom (or one of the bathrooms)... "Not if you get sick of me first." she muttered, her hands leaving his to grab his side and pull herself closer. "I know I'm asking something huge. I'm probably not the ultimate housemate 100% of the time. I just don't want you to say it because you think I want to to say yes. I wouldn't mind if you didn't want to. I mean, there must've been a reason my ex still didn't want us to move after 6 years. I know I can be a bitch, I actually look like a troll 80% of the time... Just... please tell me you,re not doing this for me." She finished dropping her head against his chest.
Little pink houses || Samra
Maybe he had exaggerated a little with his hollering out to her, "A jacuzzi. Sara! In the fucking backyard! Sara! Just like that!", but what had caught his attention seemed like a deal breaker to him. He already imagined them having a two person party. "I think you and your lover would really, uh, you know, enjoy it. " he said less excitedly, moments ago he was pondering over who knows what and now he was practically jumping up and down over nothing. Sometimes even he worried himself. He worried others might be on to him, on to his bullshit facade of being okay. "So what have you thought? " he asked Sara trying to mimick her feelings, this wwas after all a serious decision.
"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Sara yelled. "I thought you were dying or something!"She was stuck between the urge to hug him to death, or slap the life out of his face. The nerve he had, to just go on about the hot tub, and her lover. Yet how could she really be mad at him when he looked like a four year-old walking into the Times Square Toys R Us for the first time in his life. Seeing how happy it made him, something so simple, it had to make her smile. He liked it, she knew it. She knew for some reasons, the Hot Tub was his equivalent to the piano. He liked it. I liked the house.
"I like it. I mean... there's a fucking piano in there. Except... 5 bedrooms. That's a bit big, for only me. Unless..." Sara froze as the thought almost left her mouth. Or would that actually be that bad? "Could you... excuse us for a minute...?" the brunette ushered to the real estate lady, her eyes never leaving Sam's. Something took over her, that was the only way to explain this sudden boldness. A new Sara was growing inside. A Sara who realized that her last relationship lasted 6 years, and he still didn't want to make the big move and share her place. It was all a lie people told. Time wasn't what should matter in those things. She'd take her chance. "Okay, I'm going to be completely crazy here. And by crazy, I mean fucking batshit but... I like the piano, you like the hot tub. I live a hotel, and so do you. We basically just stay over all the time. This house... I like it... but it's too big for just me..."
Little pink houses || Samra
Sam shrugged he hadn't moved from his initial position next to their guide, "Well the piano sounds good to me. You sound good to me. The bedroom sounds good to me. But I need a smoke." He gave the woman next to him a pat on the shoulder, "You girls have fun okay?" Sam walked out to the backyard, he checked if he wasn't being followed before lighting a cigarette. He found himself feeling uncomfortable if he wasnt alone or just with Sara, his patience there had expired and his thoughtless words were an indication of that. Did he really give, Candy or Randy or whatever her name was, a bro pat? He wanted to leave just as much as he wantes to help Sara decide on what would be best for her. The actor let the smoke fill his lungs, his eyes closed, he let it out slowy through his nose. Sam opened his eyes, he squinted, "Is that a...Sara!!! Sara come quick!!! " he yelled excitedly after her probably very busy girlfriend.
"Don't get lost, alright?" Sara called out after him. Lets not say it too loud, or aloud at all, but she was partly glad he decided to take this breather, she needed it too. She needed to focus on actually looking at the house, and not focus on trying not to get herself in some trouble for once. With a little apologetic smile, she followed the other woman out of the room. This time she did make an effort actually listening to what was said about the place. 5 bedrooms, really? When would she even need that much space? Well maybe if she invited the entire family...
Her train of thought was stopped by the yells coming from the backyard. Oh god, what did he get himself into again?! Her heart jumped and without a second thought, sprinted towards the door, Mandy hot on her heels. "What is it?! What happened!? What's going on!?" the brunette worried, almost tripping over her own feet and falling down in her rush.
Little pink houses || Samra
"Oh my god!! A pee-aaah-no. " he screamed then whispered slowly, his eyes wide in shock though his lips smiled with mischief. He let his girl run up to the piano. "Hey Sara, what if its cursed? Y'know? Who leaves a perfectly good piano behind unless it's cursed...maybe by some ancient Japanese shit." He asked Sara though he knew her attention was clearly not on him. "Were they? Japanese? The people who died here? " he asked Mandy with a serious tone.
"No one died here sir." She answered with annoyance. "Yeah riiiight..." he murmured as he walked towards the big shiny black box of music. "I can totally see you playing this...naked." the last word he said rapidly to see if she was paying attention or not.
It had to be some sort of sign. When Sara's fingers touched the keys, it felt right. All of it was. Suddenly this didn't feel like a second choice. The stars somewhere aligned to lead her to this place. She couldn't help herself from hitting a few keys and winced. "Well if it's not cursed, it clearly needs tuning." She answered, but only paying half attention. Before you know it, the singer was sitting down, entranced by the discovery.Â
"Shut up." Was the only indication she gave about whether she was listening or not. She slammed her hands on the keys and jumped up, suddenly invigorated. "Alright, lets continue this." she smiled, grabbing Sam's arm. "You choose where to now. But I swear to god if you say bedroom..."
Little pink houses || Samra
Kids? Is she planning on having kidsâŚever? Will they even last that long? After days of avoiding his own thoughts, they were all at once bombarding him. What will you say when she asks? Would you do it for her? For her and not for Leslie?Â
Shut up.Â
âWhat?â he said anything to snap him back to reality, back to Sara. âSurfaces?â The actor smiled at the woman in front of them whoâs name he had already forgotten, he positioned himself behind his girlfriend completely and hugged her close. To her ear he whispered, probably loud enough for the woman to hear âWe could always spend hours and hours banging- I mean hanging shit. â Still holding Sara tight against his chest, he delivered his words towards the other brunette, âWe can hang shit on the walls. Like fuckingâŚviolins, she collects violins. She doesnât know how to play them but you know how eccentric artists can be, huh?â Sam shrugged and hoped his absent mindedness had gone unperceived, he promised himself not to do exactly what he was doing, when around Sara and other people: making them feel uncomfortable. For Saraâs sake.Â
The house. Look at it. That's what you're here for. But Sara realized it was quite hard to concentrate with him hovering over her. Her first idea was to push his hand away from where they were tightly wrapped around her middle, but it seemed her body had other ideas, as she notice her own hands just stopped and covered his, cementing the embrace. The warm breath against her cheek really wasn't of any help. "Yes yes, all of the above." she mumbled, turning her head to peck his lips lightly. "But that is if we even get the house, which I doubt will happen if we misbehave. So... down boy."
The tour finally continued as Mandy led them down a flight of stairs, talking about the state of the house and a lot of other things Sara didn't bother listening to. The stairs led them to a small area and a few doors. Behind the first one, a small bathroom. Then an office space. As the third door was opened, Sara almost sprinted inside the room. "Holy fuck! There's a piano in there?!" Her fingers ran against the black and white tiles. "Look, Sam! There's a piano!" the singer excitedly proclaimed, as if there was a way to miss the huge instrument in the room. And something clicked inside. She didn't even want to see the rest of the house -but she was going to anyways-, she knew she wanted it. It was a sign or something.
holy fuck
Oh wow! Now that is cool! When do you move?â
Uh... soon I think. I need to check with Sam about that one. But I promise a nice pizza party when it's all settled!
holy fuck
Where aboutâs is it?
Uh it's on Brant street... I wish I could remember the neighborhood's name though. It's close to Balboa Park, a few streets west of it. They had a piano room. I couldn't NOT get it.
holy fuck
For a second I read that as âHorseâ.. But Yay! Congratulations!
Damn I wish I had a horse! But yeah... wow a great big house! Look at me, being a grown up.