Post 6: The Role Latinx Mothers in Queer Family Acceptance
When researching the topic of family experiences among Trans and gender variant Latinxs I came across an interestingĀ phenomenon. It seems that Latinx cisfemale relatives play an important role in affirming the identities of trans Latinxs. Latinx mothers specifically were not only more likely to accept and embrace their trans children but also educate other family members. This is important because it explores the intersections of gender variance, being female identified, and race in regards to conceptions of gender.Ā
A study about familial acceptance/rejection among Transwomen of color showed that āMothers, grandmothers, and other female relatives were more likely to be described by Transwomen as accepting,āĀ (Bimbi et.al., 2009). This was in stark contrast to the reactions from male relatives, as fathers, brothers, grandfathers were often less supportive. (Bimbi, et.al.,2009).Ā The study was an even mix of Black and Latinx Transwomen and showcased the different reactions family members had to their gender identity.Ā
Female relatives of both Black and Latinx Transwomen did not just accept their daughters, but they actively supported and celebrated them even when other family members did not. One participant said,Ā āMy mother, she was there for me ⦠Then when I told my father, it was a big issue, because heās a religious person ⦠He put me out, but my mom, she had another place [for me] to go,ā (Bimbi et.al., 2009). In this instance a mother went out of her way against her husbandās wishes to help support her Trans daughter. Another participant talks about her mom as her biggest supporter,Ā āMy motherās my best friend. She buys me panties and bras⦠my aunt, nephews and niece ⦠they accept me to the fullest. They see me the way I want to see myself, which is [as] a femaleā, (Bimbi et.al., 2009).Ā
Most of the data about cisfemale relatives acceptance of Trans and gender variant Latinxs was collected from the perspective of the Trans Latinxs themselves. There was not too much written about their perspective or process in understanding their Trans relatives. One short Youtube documentary about Gay and Trans Latinxs,Ā āTal Como Somos/Just as We Areā, includes the relationship that Gabby, a Transwoman, has with her mom. (Jrv4utube, 2008) Gabby says, āMy mom knew. Maybe unconsciously, she knew. About my sexual orientation. She just didnāt want to accept it,ā (Jrv4utube, 2008). Gabi explains how at first her mom did not understand and even kicked her out of the house; but when Gabi came back fully presenting as a woman, she accepted that this is who she really was. Gabiās mom says,Ā āI had never seen anything like this in my family. I talked to Gabi and he said,Ā āMommy, this is how I am. I am like thisāā, (Jrv4utube, 2008). Gabiās mom had little knowledge as to what being Transgender meant, but after some time and realization that this was her daughterās identity, she accepted. She says,Ā āYou know, there comes a moment where one has to accept it, accept things the way they areā (Jrv4utube, 2008).
Another resource that I found showcasing Latinx mothersā acceptance and involvement in their Queer childrenās identities was theĀ āTres Gotas de aguaā (Three drops of water) short series released by the Somos Familia organization. This short series documents the thoughts of three immigrant Latinas about their Queer children and their advice to other Latinx parents with Queer children and to the Latinx community in general. With these mothers, there seemed to be very little resistance to the identities at the time of their childrenās coming out. (Somosfamilia1, 2011) They seemed to not only accept their children as Queer, but to celebrate them and advocate for them. Susana says about her Lesbian daughter,Ā āWhy should I limit her or treat her as an inferior being? Because of a sexual difference?ā. (Somosfamilia1, 2011) On the last question she makes a face and scoffs as if the idea of rejecting her child based on their queerness was the most ridiculous thing she has ever heard. Further, she talks about the importance of Queer Latinx feeling supported by their families and communities as she describes her own experience with her daugher, āShe had a right, and we had an obligation to make her feel goodā. (Somosfamilia1, 2011)
Overall, it is important to recognize the significance of Latinx communities and familiesā support for Queer Latinxs. Some Queer Latinx may face neglect, rejection, and even hostility by their parents. However, this is not every familyās case. Also, Latinx mothers and other cisfemale relatives seem to play an important role in affirming the identities of Queer Latinxs and in advocating for them to other family members and to the rest of the Latinx community. This is important work that is done out of love, humility, and understanding and so it must not be overlooked.Ā
Works Cited
Bimbi, David S., Joline A. Koken, and Jeffrey T. Parsons. āExperiences of Familial AcceptanceāRejection among Transwomen of Color.ā Journal of Family Psychology 23.6 (2009): 853. Print.
jrv4utube. āTal Como Somos/Just As We Are ā Gay and Trans Latinos.ā Youtube.com. March 25th, 2008 2008. Web. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyIrPFntrqM>.
Somosfamilia1. āTres Gotas de Agua.ā Youtube.com. April 26, 2011 2011. Web. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLtHcbmvjAg>.
Really great post! I really found your blog project to be fascinating and hope you continue to do more research. It was very interesting to read about how cis females relatives in Latinx trans families are more likely to be supportive and accepting. Not only that, but how they play a role in affirming identities. I will definitely be watching the link to the short series you provided.













