Fifth Post: Recalling Childhood
Transgender adults were asked about their upbringing and experiences in schools and with their families. Ā Growing up as a gender variant child comes with many different challenges. Ā Some children have a harder time than others depending on how supportive their family, friends, and peers are. Ā Without support from their family it is more difficult to feel confident at school. Ā
One transgender adult shared how they found an image in a catalogue that they really enjoyed. Ā They wanted to be able to achieve the same look, so they showed the image to their mom. She told them no, for the sheer fact that they were born a boy and the attire in the picture was for girls. Ā They suppressed the idea and tried their best to not let anyone else know how they truly felt. Ā Holding these feelings in is hurtful to the self. Ā Fearing criticism from others and never feeling like you can be yourself can lower self-esteem.
Children who are not supported and encouraged to be who they are by their family most likely will not try to be themselves in school. Ā Since children only understand the basics of the binary they can be left feeling confused as to why what they feel is considered āwrongā by their families and peers. Ā One person noted that they knew to hide how they felt in school but somehow the children ājust knewā they were different. Ā Despite trying to fit in this individual was targeted and shunned by their peers. Ā
Children who fake it only to attempt to fit in with their peers at school (even if they manage to be convincing to their peers) suffer. Ā Another individual stated how they felt depressed, anxious about school, alienated, and desperate to be understood (Clemson, Diamond, Riley, & Sitharthan 2012). Ā All of this takes away from the growing experiences that other children get to go through. Ā These things arenāt things that young children should be so concerned with or subjected to.
Riley, E. A., Clemson, L., Sitharthan, G., & Diamond, M. (2013). Surviving a Gender-Variant Childhood: The Views of Transgender Adults on the Needs of Gender-Variant Children and Their Parents. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 39.
http://www.hawaii.edu/PCSS/biblio/articles/2010to2014/2012-surviving-gender-variant-childhood.html
I really liked this post because it touches on the interaction with peers. Children learn about binaries from the communities around them. This puts them in a position where they feel that they have concrete definitions of gender and can police others into fitting these definitions. A lot of shame can and does come from our interactions with peers and therefore childrenās interactions are a very important aspect to look at.












