Rae's Novels - The Blog

Weird ramblings from a writer who tries...sometimes.

[ad-wills]

don't leave me!

[raesnovelsblog]

I've been guilty of that one too many times. Now, I'll write an idea on my hand if paper's not around.

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My next set of movies I'm going to watch is possession movies. This is not an exhaustive list or even my top favorites. These are the ones I either wanted to watch right now.

Here's my list if you want to follow along:

Bird Box, Bird Box: Barcelona, Evil Dead: Dead Rise, Jessabelle, Ouija: Origin of Evil, Smile, Talk To Me, and The Taking Of Deborah Logan.

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

A teenage boy named Max and his little sister move to Salem, where he struggles to fit in before awakening a trio of diabolical witches that were executed in the 17th century.

My review

I rewatch this movie every Halloween season. It is a fun feel good movie filled with jokes. Not every movie needs gore to be awesome. Sure, there’s a nostalgia factor to it too, but I genuinely love this movie.

Rating : 9/10

Spoilery thoughts below I had while watching the movie. You've been warned.

McGee! 

That song is beautifully haunting.

He was a good big brother. He believed (rightly so) that the witches were dangerous and yet he risked his life to try and save her.

“Another glorious morning. Makes me sick.” Iconic line.

Emily could have helped a little.

Based on how the sisters knew the spell from memory, have they turned someone else into a cat before?

I’m surprised that the tree they were hanged from didn’t play into their lore.

Could Zachary not speak in cat form yet?

Having a teacher tell the backstory is a fun storytelling device, but also could happen. Here in TN I had many teachers tell the Bell Witch story around Halloween.

Jay and Ice remind me of Jay and Silent Bob.

I’d be annoyed at Dani too. 

His parents don’t say anything to Dani for being in his room and expect him to take her trick or treating without asking.

Now she’s getting him into a fight. 

That door wasn’t open in the establishing shot. Did they barge into a stranger’s house?

Zachary is a pretty black cat.

Can Zachary talk now because the sisters are back? He doesn’t seem surprised. 

I love how matter of fact Max is. Sees witches, nonplussed. A talking cat, not an issue.

Why didn’t they use Sean Murray’s voice?

I love Doug Jones. That man doesn’t get near enough credit for all his work.

Having brother and sister play husband and wife is weird.

The mom’s costume is well done. So why does the dad look like he’s wearing his pajamas under his Dracula cape?

I don’t care how many times I watch it, that music scene will always reign supreme.

Although, how would they know that song?

Their plan didn’t work, but at least they tried something.

Her riding that vacuum will always be funny.

They established it’s around five in the morning. You’re telling me there wasn’t one adult awake that could see all the children marching in the street?

If Winifred had listened to her sisters and ate Jay or Ice, they would have won.

He had to have those leaves and feathers in his mouth before he cut the thread.

Winifred got in a few sips of Max before she turned to stone. Does that mean she took a few years off of Max’s life?

I still think when Mary dusted the vacuum should have dropped.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

The origins of Sarah Fier's curse are finally revealed as history comes full circle on a night that changes the lives of Shadysiders forever.

My review

Good wrap up. I liked the 1666 half better than the 1994 part 2 half. But I like the 94 part 2 better than the 94 part one film. It’s hard to wrap up a series and make everyone happy. I thought they did a good job. All the main questions were answered and the ending felt satisfying. Overall, I’d give this series a recommend. 

Rating : 8/10

Spoilery thoughts I had while watching the movie below. You've been warned.

Were the adults completely oblivious? Not one picked up on their code?

The widow fell in love with a Native and they told everyone she was a witch. Yep. That tracks.

She’s not home so you just go through her stuff? Not cool.

The red flower. They didn’t forget about it.

Even The dog got recast.

Of course they’d blame Sarah and not the preacher’s daughter. 

What an incel. Sarah wouldn’t get with him and now he’s trying to turn the entire town against her.

I do appreciate that the town’s folk found it weird that the preacher locked all the kids inside the church.

The eyeballs were sufficiently gross.

Did he stage the kids before or after he plucked out his own eyes?

Solomon tried to talk some sense into them. He was to blame for everything though.

Solomon didn’t think his deal through. 

One man says something (a lie) and now they’re witches.

Solomon could have stopped all of this, but he didn’t. He’d rather let Sarah and Hannah take the blame than admit it was all him.

Sarah’s going to do witchcraft because she’s already been accused. Kind of like the ending of The Witch.

That was good make-up on the widow’s corpse.

Poor Sarah. She thought she found an ally.

He blames the preacher for the death of his wife and son. I get that part. But Solomon’s still refusing to take responsibility for all the other deaths.

Losing a hand that way would have to hurt.

She didn’t even try to tell the crowd it was Solomon. I don’t blame her. They wouldn’t have listened and at least this way she saved Hannah.

And the red flower spreads.

I like Sarah better than Deena.

And now we’re back to 94 part 2.

I didn’t see the sheriff being evil the 1st time I watched this trilogy. The clues were there in all the films, but I didn’t see it.

Why did Nick pick Ryan to be the killer in the 1st movie? 

Why pick Ryan at all? In Deena's monologue she says it happens every generation. Nick already did his at camp. Why did he get two?

Poor Ziggy. Up until Nick is discovered to be evil. I shipped them.

“You want to help us kill Sheriff Goode?”/”Let me get my coat.” ha.

I can not begin to tell you the stranglehold CK One had on the 90’s.

I would have liked the backstory on the killer with the long mask. The one that’s reminiscent of a plague mask.

Appreciate the call back to the gate at Dalton’s only going most of the way down.

Did Nick and/or his brother have a hand in planning the mall? How did they get the contractors to ignore the caves?

Aw, Ziggy reunited with nurse Lane.

There’s a lot of people at the mall considering there was just multiple mass murders there.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

Shadyside, 1978. School's out for summer and the activities at Camp Nightwing are about to begin. But when another Shadysider is possessed with the urge to kill, the fun in the sun becomes a gruesome fight for survival.

My synopsis: 

No notes.

My review

Out of the trilogy, this one is my favorite. I’d give it a higher rating if it was dealing solely with the 78 story. But if you are a fan of 80’s slashers or Stranger Things, you’ll probably like this one. The characters are a lot more likable in this one and the plot is tighter.

Rating : 8/10

Spoilery thoughts I had while watching the movie below. You've been warned.

I unapologetically love Sadie Sink.

Where the 1st movie was Scream meets Halloween, this one is more like Friday the 13th in the best way.

They go from knocking to breaking and entering very quickly.

All those ticking clocks would drive me insane.

Sheila is a psycho.

Ziggy was strung up by a tree, but by all means, chastise her for talking out of turn.

That’s right Ziggy. You don’t fall at his feet just because he did his job.

She wore a white top and is now upset that it got dirty?

“Nurse Lane, I’m in trouble again.” I bet she has been to the infirmary a lot.

I like the neighbor they took the kids to from the 1st movie is the nurse in this movie. And also the mother to one of the serial killers. I like neat touches like that.

Cindy’s accusing Ziggy of being selfish, but Ziggy’s showing concern for nurse Lane.

Mother of a serial killer. Everyone would think she had gone insane. She was right though.

The bell rings and everyone snaps out of it and runs to get food. That rang true to me.

Now Cindy wants to know about nurse Lane.

Cindy is selfish. She covers it up with toxic positivity, but she only cares about how she’s seen and what she’s going to do.

The other campers are terrorizing Ziggy and the sister barely reacts.

“Carry On My Wayward Son” Will always think of Supernatural and I’m okay with that.

I’d want to check out the witch map over the color war too.

Nick sees Ziggy’s cabin defaced but his 1st instinct isn’t to punish anyone. They really do only punish the Shadyside kids.

“Ziggy sucks cocks in hell.” Exorcist reference - nice.

Would not go down the creepy stone steps. Sadly, I might have when I was a teenager. 

You would have doubts simply seeing Tommy’s name on the rock, but after he attacked that guy with an ax all doubt is gone.

Why would she think Will set up a romantic meeting with her in the bathroom?

Saddie Sink is so amazing. Is there anyone she can’t have chemistry with?

I shipped them so hard.

I don’t care if the thing was calling to me, I don’t think I would touch it.

That crunch sound was too real.

There’s a distinct lack of shit for that to be directly under the outhouse.

Nick’s regretting what he’s done. 

Did Ziggy not notice that even though Nick was in between them, Tommy left Nick to go after her?

She stabbed him and then tried to smother him. Ziggy doesn’t go down without a fight.

I doubt a hand that old would hold together.

She removed his head with a shovel. That was badass.

How do the killers know when to stop? They don’t have a quota. 

So it wasn’t that Ziggy died and was brought back, it was that Nick brought her back. It’s a wonder that more people Nick knows don’t get hurt. He doesn’t have control over who they go after.

They left their bodies out in the rain? That’s messed up.

So is Ziggy still in danger or is she being paranoid?

If that red stuff is evasive as Cindy said it was, that janitor must have to clean around that tree nightly.

I like when anthologies swap stories but keep the same cast.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

A circle of teenage friends accidentally encounter the ancient evil responsible for a series of brutal murders that have plagued their town for over 300 years. Welcome to Shadyside.

My review

If you’re looking for a 90's feel horror movie without some of the outdated cliches, this one’s for you. The story is engaging. I didn’t like the main character as much in the first movie, but she grew on me. The rest of the cast is solid. The 90’s feel and the music alone are worth the watch. Weakest of the three, but a solid film.

Rating : 8/10

Spoilery thoughts below I had while watching the movie. You have been warned.

Starting off with Maya Hawke, great start. Very Scream of them. Fits well with the 90’s theme.

I love R.L. Stine books. They were the perfect horror starter books.

OMG Dalton’s. I haven’t heard that name in forever.

Using Closer is becoming cliche in 90’s movies, but I approve for use in a slasher. Plus, I just love that song.

Being in a mall after hours is creepy. Can confirm.

The stores in the mall were random back then.

Her death scene is almost shot for shot Drew Barrymore’s death scene from Scream.

Wow the music over the news reports in the credits is crazy close to Scream’s. I knew that it was an influence, but I didn’t remember how much.

Garbage. That band is still great. I remember listening to that song on repeat for hours.

Josh hiding beneath that sheet makes him look like he’s doing something else on that computer.

The song selection is phenomenal.

Who’s driving the bus? Bottles are being thrown. They opened the emergency door. Is there an adult on this bus?

She was letting the kids she was babysitting package the drugs? Worst babysitter ever.

Now they’re borrowing from Halloween.

No, you do not walk towards the lonely girl sitting by herself at night.

I like Kate calling Deena out for being too cool to wear the headlamp while they stroll through the dark forest. 

Okay, I get the hook up scene between Sam and Deena (they didn’t really have time for that with a killer on the loose, but I digress), but Simon taking time to masturbate is even weirder.

It didn't work, but the plan sounded solid enough.

Poor Sam shouldn’t have any blood left after they’ve spread it everywhere.

That bread slicer scene is messed up.

Laying the blame on the dead friends is messed up. I get they couldn’t go with the truth, but still feels wrong.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

Two years after Cole survived a satanic blood cult, he's living another nightmare: high school. And the demons from his past? Still making his life hell.

My synopsis: 

Everything and everyone conspires against Cole and the new girl to kill them before dawn to get what they want.

My review

I truly enjoyed that movie. I don’t like it as much as the first one, but it’s still pretty great. The gore and comedy are over the top and I am here for it. The entire film is like a fever dream in the best way possible.

Rating : 8/10

Spoilery thoughts below I had while watching. You have been warned.

The movie is supposed to be 2 years in the future, but Cole looks 4 years older.

No one believing Cole’s story tracks with Cole’s life. 

He’s still hung up on Max being shirtless.

Still doesn’t like shots. That’s not a thing you get over just because you murdered 5 people.

I love Jenna Ortega.

I would be mortified if a teacher/principal ever did that too me.

So if the parents don’t believe him, what do they think happened to all the dead people? Do they think he did or didn’t kill them?

I would freak out if my childhood stuffed animal randomly showed up in my locker.

Cole isn’t doing himself any favors with the clothes he wears. 

The neighbor’s dad is such a tool. Again, how does he have so much custody?

She arrives via trucker?

She was making out with him. Cole should have known something was up.

But he did pick up on her calling it the devil’s book. Go Cole.

“What the fuck…again!” Ha.

And shirtless Max is back.

“The devil gives good head.” Ha.

I love Max’s character. He’s so supportive of Cole, yet actively trying to kill him. Layers.

I appreciate that she just, believes him. She saw the dead body and that’s all it took.

The Deliverance theme. 

Of course that guy was going to be a jerk.

Cole used the shoelaces trick on him. Perfect.

I’m not a huge fan of Bella Thorn, but I adore her in these movies.

She shot herself in the boob, again!

Cole hit him with the leg. 

“You finally found my dick Cole.” HA.

A hair net but no shirt. So on brand for Max.

You don’t scare someone mid stream. That’s what you get.

The dance/sex montage is unhinged in the best way possible.

Bear McCreary! I love his stuff. 

“I’m taking your IUD.” What?

If your fight scene is going to be cartoonish, why not lean into it.

I like that B was Phoebe's babysitter too.

“You’re not so innocent anymore.”

And Max is proud.

The dad saw. Finally.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

When Cole stays up past his bedtime, he discovers that his hot babysitter belongs to a satanic cult that will stop at nothing to keep him quiet.

My synopsis: 

No notes. Perfect synopsis.

My review

I’m so glad I decided to rewatch this movie. It is the perfect mix of comedy and horror. The tone is set early and it follows through beautifully. Perfect for anyone that wants a lighthearted horror movie. This started my love of Samara Weaving and I don’t think Robbie Amell gets enough credit for his acting.

Rating : 9/10

Spoilery thoughts below I had while watching. You have been warned.

I know it’s setting up his fear of needles, but why is he shirtless?

If the neighbor’s dad is that much of a dick, why does he seemingly have custody of her?

I love her outfit. It’s the kind of outfits hot girls pull off.

Ken Marino should be in more things.

I want to say isn’t he a little young for all those toys, but at the same time why should he have to give up playing with things he loves just because he’s getting older?

Up until the whole sacrifice thing, B’s a pretty cool babysitter.

B’s sci-fi list is epic.

At least he knew to fake cough.

I appreciate throwing the names up on screen with the new people. There were a lot of new characters all at once.

The “what the fuck” above Cole’s head. Perfect!

Was the group not worried about Cole’s neighbors hearing the screams?

B might be a homicidal maniac, but she does care about Cole.

“Why is he shirtless?” Not wrong. More pressing questions, but still valid.

He keeps getting sprayed with blood. I love it.

She got shot in the boob. Ha.

Max is actively trying to kill him, but he still takes time to walk Cole through breathing through the pain. God I love this movie.

Cole’s plans might not be perfect, but I wouldn’t expect perfect plans from the character they set up. 

“I’m still alive mother…” Lol.

Max is impressed and so am I.

Max takes time out from, yet again, trying to kill Cole, to teach him how to stand up for himself. Ha.

“I came here to kill people.” At least Max is clear on his motivation.

Of course he was going to climb the rope.

I like that the neighbor believed him, no questions asked.

“Let’s make out next time.” This movie is perfect in the most absurd way possible.

The cheerleader is trying to kill him, but yet yells at him for punching her in the boob?! Love.

She fucking explodes.

B says she’ll have to run again. How many times has she done this?

The green flames are pretty.

Failed plan set to Queen. Perfection. I expect nothing less from Cole.

I like Cole’s definition of an adult.

That is so much property damage.

That was a cool line, but that is not an explanation.

Cole obviously has never watched Scream. You have to shoot them in the head or they come back.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

A family in 1630s New England is torn apart by the forces of witchcraft, black magic and possession.

My synopsis: 

A family that is too fervent in their views suffers loss and extreme paranoia by witchcraft and their own mental decline.

My review

I hadn’t watched this movie since it first came out. It is a very good movie that was shot and executed extremely well. The theme of a woman burgeoning sexuality is dangerous is clear in its messaging. However, it’s not something I’d want to watch over and over again. I got what they were trying to do, and they did it well, but it still pissed me off. Everything was Tomison’s fault when she really could only be blamed for one or two things. The injustice makes it harder for me to rewatch. I’m definitely a payback/vengeance lady.

Rating : 8/10

Spoilery thoughts I had rewatching the movie. You have been warned.

Anya Taylor Joy is a great actress. She hasn’t said a word yet and you know exactly how she’s feeling.

How puritan do you have to be to be kicked out of the colonies?

Tomison hesitates and I don’t fault her. I wouldn’t want to move out into the middle of nowhere either.

That mom is creepy looking. 

That music cue was intense.

All feel bad for all women that lived during that time.

That baby got snatched quickly. Like, her eyes were not closed for that long.

Not a fan of the trope that she’s a scary old woman because she’s old. 

His baby brother was snatched, of course the son would be wary of the woods.

If there is anything remotely uncomfortable to discuss, the dad doesn’t want to talk about it.

If it takes that long to load the gun, would you load it, at least partially, beforehand?

Those twins are a menace. 

They don’t listen to the parents yet they yell at Tomison when they won’t listen to her?

Okay, Tomison went too far, but on the other hand, Mercy kind of deserved it.

The dad didn’t speak up and let the mom continue to blame Tomison for the missing cup. Coward.

Tomison is going through puberty so she must be sent away? Why did this woman even have kids?

What part of that lone cabin in the woods looks inviting?

Those kids would have to go.

The kids are caught up in the hysteria; I get that. They have nothing else going on  so they’re easily bored. But they’re still bastards for what they’re doing.

That mother had made up her mind about Tomison a long time ago. Nothing she says would change her mind. At least the dad has some affection for her.

He wants to believe her.

Until he snaps and boards all the kids inside the barn.

The dad looked like he considered burying her in there with the son.

That breastfeeding scene is disturbing.

Damn that ram came out of nowhere.

So the kids were taken off by the witches off screen? Cop out. Murdering children is not something done in a ton of movies, but after all the hell they put Tomison through I wanted revenge.

Of course she went off with the devil. She’d been told that was all she was good for, why wouldn’t she believe it after all this time? At least they wanted her.

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Synopsis from IMDB:

Two witch sisters, raised by their eccentric aunts in a small town, face closed-minded prejudice and a curse which threatens to prevent them ever finding lasting love.

My synopsis: 

Sisters have to evade the police after killing an abusive man with the help of their aunts, the mom’s that shunned them, and magic.

My review

I adore this movie. I haven’t watched it in awhile and there were parts I either completely forgot about or didn’t get upon initial viewing. All the actresses brought their A game. I especially loved seeing Margot Martindale. She makes everything better. It’s one of those movies that barely passes the Bechdel test, but is still a strong female centric movie. 

Rating : 9/10

Haven’t watched this movie in a long time.

Love the nod to witches just being misunderstood ladies that knew how to have a good time.

Ah the look of fear on their faces, warms my heart. What did they think would happen when they messed with a witch?

The little versions of them are adorable.

I remembered they lived with their aunts, but I forgot it was because their mother died too.

That poor little bird. It didn’t do anything.

Young Nicole Kidman looks like fun.

Why do they always cut their hands like that? That has to hurt and feels like it would take a long time to heal.

Faith Hill! I loved this song.

I’m obsessed with Sandra’s outfit. Minus the rain boots.

So is the family line also cursed with twins and/or only having girls? Because that wasn’t mentioned.

Digging this soundtrack.

I don’t see what Gilly sees in that guy. 

Her pleases are breaking my heart.

Oh my god, that’s little Evan Rachel Woods.

If you have to drug your boyfriend to go see your sister, that’s probably not a healthy relationship.

See Sally picked up on it too.

Margo Martindale! I love her.

“The nudity is completely optional, as you well remember.” Ha.

He really is a bad guy.

Jilly came up with the plan. Of course it failed.

The man held a gun to your head and that’s the best slap you could give him?

“My wife.” Damn, that movie ruined that phrase.

Digging a grave in the rain has to make it extra difficult.

Midnight margaritas sound like an awesome tradition.

I used to think it was just because they were drunk that they said all of that, but now I get that it was the dead guys' influence.

The aunts singing that song is beyond creepy.

Someone left the bottle on the porch and you drank from it? The townies hate you. I’d be afraid one of them left it with something inside.

Has no one noticed how fast the rose bush is growing?

Poor little girl. I’d be traumatized if I saw a man that no one else could see. Witch or no witch.

Her not being able to lie to him is adorable and awkward.

He murdered another woman? I didn’t remember that part at all.

The townsfolk are truly awful.

If that boy has chickenpox, should he be around the other children? 

Her and the cop have good chemistry.

He went from interrogating to making out really quickly.

The cop has seen a few magic related things, but seeing a ghost rise out of a woman is hard to brush off as something else.

He’s having a hard time adjusting, but he didn’t hesitate with the badge and I give him props for that.

“I wished for you too.” I actually awwed.

I love her using the phone tree.

I love the look of awe in the daughters’ eyes when she lit the candle with magic.

Margo looking around trying to figure out the words - priceless.

Gilly hitting that invisible wall was a good effect.

The power of women. 

So she’s not afraid that he’s only there because of magic anymore?

I want her dress.

When the town thought they were witches, they were scared of them. Now that they know they are witches, everyone’s cool?

I love that the littlest one jumped up into the cops arms. At least you won’t have to worry about the kids not liking the new guy.

[raesnovelsblog]

Next up on the rewatch/watch list are my witchy movies. This is not an exhaustive list by any means. It's just the movies I want to watch right now.

Here's the list if you want to watch along:

Practical Magic, The Witch, The Babysitter, The Babysitter Killer Queen, Fear Street: 1994, Fear Street: 1978, Fear Street: 1666, and Hocus Pocus

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

Strange things start happening after a girl is found drowned in a lake.

My synopsis: 

A grieving family has to reconcile their feelings while deciding if the ghost is real or a hoax.

My review

First time watching this. I’d heard about it and the twist was spoiled for me. I did like it. Most found footage type movies, at the end, everyone’s dead. This isn’t that type of movie. It felt like a true crime meets a paranormal movie.

Rating : 8/10

Spoilery thoughts I had while watching. You have been warned.

I like the use of old spirit photography.

First time watching this. I was told to look for something in the background every time they show a photo.

That would have to be so hard leaving the scene. There’s nothing you could do at night, but how do you stop looking?

Drove home in reverse? Would have been hard, but he was right about it being better than walking.

The funeral guys are creepy.

The sound of water overlaid over the timelapse is beautifully eerie.

She went into other people’s houses in the middle of the night? That’s not normal.

That incident the dad described would have freaked me the fuck out.

Mystery bruises on a kid? Never a good sign.

I believe all of the family’s motivations for believing what they believe.

The photos would be unnerving.

Of course the dad wanted to have been wrong.

Why is the footage so grainy? The camera was old, but not that old.

So who was filming the mom and the psychic?

Alice is creeping in the background of the seance.

The police don’t believe. Love that trope.

So the brother created the photos?

This family needs psychological help.

If you were the one faking the photo, why leave the cameras running?

So was Alice haunting them all along or did all the talk of an Alice ghost conjure her up?

I thought I saw a person over on the right hand side earlier.

It was the neighbor? You people need to stay out of other people’s homes.

So Alice was a cliche babysitter screwing the parents? Whose idea was it to film it? Alice looked at the camera like she knew it was there.

Not victim shaming Alice. They were adults and she was underage.

You’ve been working with this family all this time and never mentioned that their dead daughter came to see you?

Dreaming about your death has to be a completely unnerving feeling.

I’m glad they can see what’s going on in these clips, because it’s very hard to discern anything.

Can’t say as I blame them for going to dig up whatever Alice buried.

Why was Alice filming? I get that it’s freaky to see your death face walking towards you, but what was she filming up till then?

I love that they all have different opinions on what she saw. They didn’t see it, so they wouldn’t have a definitive answer.

Usually these movies end with everyone’s death. They are having to just move on.

These people whisper, a lot. I keep having to turn my volume up.

So the mother and daughter were having dreams of each other? I can’t decide if that’s sweet or incredibly creepy.

“She’s gone” Slow pan into the ghost in the window.

How long had this other Alice been watching Alice?

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

Chaos breaks out in a small Maryland town after an ecological disaster occurs.

My synopsis:

A student reporter retells the harrowing events of a parasitic outbreak that the government tried to cover up.

My review

Solid found footage film. No glaring incidents of people filming when they realistically would have dropped the camera. Amping up the real life isopods is a neat touch. Grounding your horror in some sort of normalcy is more believable. I didn’t really click with the reporter character or I would have scored this higher.

Rating : 7/10

Spoilery thoughts below I was having while rewatching the movie.

Using real news footage to set up the nature of your story is smart.

Girl put that tongue back in your mouth.

Bogus website leaked the confiscated footage. Okay. Sure. Whatever.

You would be critical of yourself on camera.

It’s everyone’s dream to be Miss Crustation? Really? Are you sure?

The reporter trying to conjure up a memory of sharks in the bay in the past is priceless.

That bite looks like it has eyes and is smiling.

Who would look at those bites and think of sharks? No way is that a shark bite.

If the website was shut down, how do they have it? I get the footage, but they have the surrounding site itself.

They assumed the water was clean because the EPA said so. Horror movies are a little too real sometimes.

The woman is in distress, but everyone is walking the other way. 

Over 350+ patients in one day is a lot especially for a big hospital, let alone a small town.

The doctor called for help. Good for him.

The CDC didn’t have any answers, but it was good they were called.

The use of dash cam footage is a nice touch.

It was the baby’s first 4th, of course they’d be filming.

Filming a bloody lady through the window like you’re trying to see, but also keep hidden from her is realistic.

911 asks for the address. The lady responded with I’m at my house. She doesn’t know where you live.

I appreciate that the reporter is sweating.

Stop doing that thing with your tongue.

Small town mayor not wanting to close the festivities because it’d be bad for tourism. Did he not watch Jaws?

That would scare the shit out of me if the isopod ran out of the fish’s mouth.

It’s Al-Qaeda? A strange cloud? Really? 

“Jessica, are you okay?” Does she look okay?

I get that there are two different parasites/strains, but they attacked her like piranha.

The doctor getting frustrated with the CDC is justifiable. 

The isopod eating through the fish's tongue is gruesome. The fact that it occurs in nature is horrifying. 

Why is the CDC watching old news footage? Shouldn’t they have their own sources?

The phone call from the mom is heartbreaking.

The EPA lists off all everything that is or could be in the water, but is nonplused. Saying it’s not their problem because they only regulate the filtered water. Feels like something that would really happen and that’s way more terrifying than a guy in a rubber mask.

Why was the bridge shut down? If it was shut down for three days, surely someone would have started walking?

No, you don’t split up officer. You have a partner for a reason.

And the piranha isopods are back.

You’ve been hearing wailing and screaming all day. Why would you go inside the restaurant because you heard screams?

And there’s blood outside? Turn around and go home.

The CDC’s recommendation is for the doctor and staff to leave?

I feel like the teens are having two different versions of the same conversation. Like some of it syncs, but not everything.

Oh, so the national guard is who blocked off the bridge.

You have 350+ people at the hospital, but yeah, help from the outside is what’s going to freak people out.

Okay, so why is the water affecting people today? It’s a holiday, but it’s still summer. People don’t wait till the 4th to use their pools. Why hasn’t this shone up before now?

The national guard blocked the bridge, but they didn’t block off the bay?

The town’s going to shit, but your first thought is that your deputies are playing a prank on you?

“Get in the back of the car” No. He is clearly in distress and has his weapon drawn.

You deserved to get shot. I have no sympathy for you.

Ha. The look on the mayor’s face is priceless.

I really appreciate the doctor. He doesn’t know what’s causing the isopods to grow so fast, that’s not his concern. He’s not getting caught up on matters that won’t help him right now?

I love how the CDC guy is getting so annoyed with the other agency.

Where the fuck did that lady in the back seat come from?

Money given for silence, I buy that.

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

After experiencing what they think are a series of "break-ins", a family sets up security cameras around their home, only to realize that the events unfolding before them are more sinister than they seem.

My synopsis:

Creepy things start happening again to a new mom. Her husband doesn’t believe her. Her stepdaughter and the nanny/housekeeper are the only people that try to help. The results are mixed at best and disastrous for others.

My review

Solid sequel/prequel. Breaks from traditional found footage films by not having unknown actors. Didn’t take me out of it, but it might others. It doesn’t do anything groundbreaking. Follows closely to the formula from the first one, but is still highly enjoyable.

Rating : 8/10

How does it treat…

Women? The dad tries to shut the wife, the daughter, and the housekeeper down multiple times, but they were all right and he wasn’t. Reflects more poorly on him than it does them.

Does it pass the Bechdel test? Yes

How long till a woman speaks? 12 seconds. Impressive.

Minorities? The housekeeper has the answers, but her help is dismissed at first as witch crap because it doesn’t fit with the husband’s suburban middle class lifestyle.

Spoilery thoughts/notes below. You have been warned.

This found footage film already starts off differently. Usually they’re all actors you’ve never heard of before. That’s Sprague Grayden. When this came out, I’d just watched her in ‘Jericho’. I loved her.

The husband takes the baby to give him a tour of the house. He introduces the dog and a fireplace where daddy introduced mommy? Ew.

And the daughter is Mandy from ‘Last Man Standing”. She was my favorite character.

Katie! And the prequel has begun.

That german shepherd is gorgeous.

Katie joking that she’s the evil step aunt and that she won’t let the baby go. Adore the foreshadowing.

Coming home to see the house destroyed would unnerve the hell out of me.

Martine knows something’s up in that house. She’s trying to get rid of the bad spirits. She deserves a raise not ridicule.

“Release the kraken”. No, just, no.

The night shots circulating through really sets up the tension.

The mom is having a personal conversation with Katie. Why would she be filming it and whispering at the same time?

Hunter looking everywhere but at his mom is eerie. It’s like when a cat stares off in a corner in the middle of the night.

That’s right. You stand up for Martine. You are now my favorite member of this family.

I love when it gets to the night footage. I can’t help but scan the scene to see if something’s moving in the background. 

“Let’s check the security camera footage” What a novel idea.

Okay, a teen thinking the haunting is cool, seems rational to me. 

Threw out “what if it’s mom”. DAMN!

The dog is scared, but still protecting that baby. Good dog.

I get he wants things to go back to normal, but pretending nothing’s wrong is a wise option. 

She has her boyfriend come over. And she didn’t lock that back door. Tsk tsk.

And now they’re playing with a ouija board. He spells out pussy. He’s a teenage boy. That makes more sense than Micah playing with the ouija board.

The boyfriend thinks it’s all fun and games till it starts moving and he’s not the one moving it.

The front door is open and it doesn’t phase her? I do love how she tried to look out of the window above it.

I jumped when the door slammed shut.

I love how the dog trotted up to the door like I’ll help you.

The demon pulled the baby out of the crib and then left? What’s scarier to me is that kid had to make it down the steps by itself. And now he’s crawling up them. 

How did the baby get back in the crib?

I appreciate that the step mom was trying to take Ali’s side.

If they’d watch that security footage, they’d see what happened.

She’s closing all the cabinets. I’d leave them open and make the non-believing husband do it.

I appreciate she’s trying to be calm to not scare the teen, but still. 

Whispering “Katie said we can’t talk about it” is not an answer that Ali is going to understand.

Ali did research to show no male children in that family tree for generations. Use that brain girl.

That poor dog was lured into the basement.

No, not the dog.

Well at least the dad acted on that.

The fake out of her getting away only to be pulled back is brilliant.

The noise the demon/door makes when it slams is truly terrifying.

Okay, Christy just casually strolling up from the basement is all kinds of unnerving.

Your daughter is freaking out to be left alone with the baby and a step mom who isn’t doing well. Call Katie. Call literally any other adult.

Okay, the teen’s use of the camera is perfect. I’d want to document weird ass scratches on the inside of the basement door as well.

Were those made by Christy, the dog, or the demon?

The teen begging her dad to come home is heartbreaking. She sounds so scared.

The mom yelling at Ali not to touch the screaming baby, unsettling.

The actress playing the daughter is so talented. Her begging the dad to watch the video before he goes upstairs is heart wrenching. 

I get he needs a minute, but listen to your daughter. Get out of the house.

He called Martine! 

Now he’s arguing with her about what to do. You called her for help. Now shut your pie hole and let her help.

I love the grown adult and the teen arguing about the morality of passing the curse on to Katie.

I knew something was about to happen when he leaned in close, but I still jumped when Christy lunged at him.

They said Christy wouldn’t remember, but starting when? Because Katie asks if the creepy things are still happening and she says no, not what are you talking about?

And it goes into the beginning of the first movie. I do appreciate things like that.

So Micah was killed on the 8th. What was Katie/demon doing for a full day?

Katie looming in the background.

She kills the dad. He passed it along to Katie and didn’t say a word. Had Katie in their house, swimming in their pool and didn’t say a word. I’m okay with his death.

Why kill the sister? Because she was holding the baby? Or was it because she was part of that bloodline?

Ali survived! She’ll be traumatized for life with her parents dead and her aunt and little brother missing, but she survived.

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

After moving into a suburban home, a couple becomes increasingly disturbed by a nightly demonic presence.

My review

Still love this movie. There are parts (Micah) that piss me off, but they’re not unrealistic. I have, unfortunately, met many a Micah. The rules they set up and how they’re followed are why this movie is so rewatchable. Every time it gets to one of the night scenes, you can help but watch for the smallest movement off in the corner. The practical effects only enhance the scares. 

Rating : 8/10

How does it treat…

Women? Not bad. But not great. You can tell Micah loves Katie, but there could have been one or two less scenes where he puts her down.

Does it pass the Bechdel test? Yes. There are only four people in this movie and one of them is Katie’s friend.

How long till a woman speaks? 41 seconds.

Relationships? Borderline unhealthy, but I’m chalking that up to Micah needing to grow up and being a financial bro. The moments where he’s being sweet are the reasons you could believe they’d still be there.

Rewatchability? Yes, especially the night scenes.

Spoilery thoughts/Notes below.

Katie seems like one of those girls that’s in a relationship where she’s grown, but he hasn’t.

Katie’s going to school, she makes jewelry, and she knits.  Props to Katie.

Micah has a guitar he can barely play. That tracks.

I love that Katie is refusing to be filmed in her bra and panties.

I will never understand the multiple pillows on the bed that you don’t actually use. 

Micah’s a day trader.  That explains so much.

Seeing a shadowy mass at the foot of your bed when you’re eight, would stay with you.

The haunting has followed her from house to house since she was eight. Not your typical haunted house where you yell at the movie for them to get out. 

The psychic is trying to investigate and Micah just wants to show off his toys.

They are asking for help, but Micah does everything the psychic says not to do.

Katie screams and he stops to get the camera. It was a spider, but he didn’t know that.

Antagonizing the demon. That will end well. I’m now wishing for his death.

Katie has a friend. Good for you. You need time away from Micah.  

Katie tells Micah she needs this girl talk moment and he completely craps all over it, because his stuff is more important. Boo.

He was a dick to both of them. And Katie’s response is “be sweet”?

Okay, not going to lie. That scream and hit noise got me.

They’re going to go back to bed with that door open? Hell no. I don’t care if it is a demon. It’s a demon that’s going to have to break a locked door down.

He was scared and now he’s joking and playing it off like it was nothing. I’m sure it’s a coping mechanism, but it’s annoying.

The camera fast forwarding and Katie’s just standing there staring, nope. Way too unnerving.

There are times in found footage movies where it doesn’t make sense for them to still be holding the camera. Making Micah be a douche makes it seem understandable.

Okay, Micah finding Katie outside and offering to stay out there with her when she doesn’t want to come inside is actually sweet.

Until he hears a noise upstairs, yells “who is it”, and calls for Katie to come back in.

He told the demon to come out. What is planning to do if it did?

Now he’s a tad scared and that makes me happy.

And now you’ve bought a ouija board after you promised you wouldn’t. Good going asshat.

Katie’s pissed and I am proud of her.

I’m surprised she didn’t leave him there.

You wanted footprints, and now you’re shocked they’re there? Reminds me of that South Park where they mocked ghost hunters for getting startled.

Finding the attic hatch open would creep me out too.

Micah slowly panning the camera around is unnervingly eerie. You look all around first.

Weird burnt up photo of young Katie equals a hell no from me.

Micah says they both could use more sleep. Well then stop egging the demon on.

The door slamming and then the banging on it, chef’s kiss.

Micah opening the door anyways, so stupid.

The psychic came in, and immediately noped out. And that’s why he is still alive at the end of the movie.

I get he’s scared too, but he’s handling it in the worst way possible.

I knew that foot hanging out would bite her in the ass.

I do not know how they did that scene, but it was scary as hell.

Where was the demon going to take her?

So not bite her in the ass, bite her on the back. Got it.

For once, Micah’s response is appropriate. 

Micah should have known something was up when Katie asked to stay when she’d been insistent on leaving. The one time his caveman behavior would have been apt and he chooses to aqueous? 

That smile was too creepy.

The staring and rocking back and forth is highly effective.

That scream is blood curdling.

And the sudden stop is worse.

Love the anticipation with the heavy footsteps.

Hurled his ass across the room. Katie/demon lifts.

The face change is okay, but they’d been so good about not using CGI up to this point. They should have stuck to it. Not bad, but it could have done without it.

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

The Abaddon Hotel will once again be open to the public. Russell Wynn has taken his audience-interactive show, Insomnia, into the abandoned hotel that is rumored to be haunted.

My review

Good wrap up for a trilogy. They hired some minorities, which is great. But the sexist talk, although mild, wasn’t in the others. I get the heaven and hell aspect, but still a tad iffy on the ending. Overall, it was a good found footage film. Good, not great. If you’d watched the other two, you’d probably want to finish the set. If not, you’re not going to miss anything by skipping it.

Rating : 6/10

How does it treat…

Women? A few sexist remarks that I could have done without, but it was only like 3 or 4 of them.

Does it pass the Bechdel test? Yes, kind of. The interview asks the cast some questions, but nothing I’d call meaningful dialog.

How long till a woman speaks? 1 minute 42 seconds. Not the first line like the other movies.

LGBTQia+? Felt like one guy was a borderline stereotype.

Minorities? Yes. For a change and it was more than one.

So, it hasn’t worked as a haunted house, and multiple people have died here…so let’s put on a play here? 

Even if you don’t believe in ghosts, you have to believe in murders and people disappearing. Why would you set foot in that place?

“Two people played a tree better than you.” As Kelso would say, “Burned!”

And the clown mannequins are back. That would be the first thing out the door, and into a burn pile.

Wasn’t this play brought down from New York? Why is she questioning the motivation now? Is this a new cast? The play’s opening in ten days. You should be a little further along.

A bon fire with alcohol at the creepy murder hotel. What could go wrong?

And the song is back.

The white robed mannequins are following her around like weeping angels.

I knew that head would be turned, but it freaked me out all the same.

Don’t wait for the clown to catch up.  Run!

If you are that adamant about no one being in the house after dark, maybe post a guard or two.

Russel’s paying them a lot. Explains why people stay.

The reporter’s reasons for staying are valid. 

Woman says something creepy and then vanishes. Probably the best possible outcome.

Rich people having enablers? The most realistic thing in this entire movie.

Russel doesn’t want her to come to the show supposedly because he doesn’t want her to get hurt. So the cast and crew are expendable because you paid them double? What about the people watching the play?

So she broke the story about him giving away his money without reaching out to him or the CEO for a comment?

Dude gorging an actor’s eyes out…running is the correct response.

Some are just strolling along. No sense of urgency.

Please tell me the robed men were on heelies and that’s how they glide.

The death scenes in the bar have been better.

Now they’re attacking people in the parking lot too?

They’re killing everyone in the bar, why not the reporter? She’s not even hiding at this point.

Russel goes back up the attic to retrieve his mystery box from the church. If you knew all of this was about to go down, wouldn’t you have it on you?

So all these people will have the traumatic memory of dying and watching those around them get slaughtered as well. Will a therapist believe them? Do you have to make your own support group?

Russel was an angel? Odd behavior for an angel. I need to save humanity and close the door to hell. But first, let’s make some wine and put on a play. Really?

The OG crew is free-ish. Not tortured anymore or made to be a pawn, but they are also trapped. Bittersweet.

Alex helped open the gate, so I get why he has to stay with Russel. But why the rest of them?

[raesnovelsblog]

Synopsis from IMDB:

It's been eight years since the opening night tragedy of Hell House, LLC and still many unanswered questions remain. Thanks to an anonymous tip, investigative journalist Jessica Fox is convinced that key evidence is hidden inside the abandoned Abaddon Hotel-evidence that will shed light on the hotel's mysteries. She assembles a team equally hungry for answers with one goal: break into the hotel and discover the truth.

My review

Solid sequel. Follows the formula of the first one, but deviates slightly. Love the additional information about the crew from the first Hell House movie. The acting was weaker in this one for me. Not horrible, but a noticeable difference. Still a solid found footage movie with creepy clowns.  Clowns will never not be terrifying.

Rating : 7/10

How does it treat…

Women? Pretty well. They have agency and aren’t there just to be tortured or saved.

Does it pass the Bechdel test? Yes. No relationships are discussed. 

How long till a women speaks? 33 seconds

Relationships? Treated fairly.

Sex? N/A

LGBTQia+? N/A

Minorities? N/A

Older People? Seen, but not demonized because they’re old.

Mental Health? Mentioned, but not a plot point.

Kids? N/A

Animals? N/A

Tone

Was it fun? Kind of.  

Was it worth it? Yes, but only so much as to complete a trilogy.

Rewatchability? Not as much as the first one.

Gore level? Minor. The blood budget is less than the first one.

Cliches

Tired? 

Appropriate? Yes

Subverted?

Spoilerly thought beyond this. You have been warned.

Notes

That dude is way too old to be playing the character the mom is describing.

The ghosts are better at new technologies than I am.

They mastered text messages faster than my parents.

That piano tune is still creepy.

I’ve watched too many true crime shows because that reporters' intro shots are spot on.

Brock Davies!? Perfect douchie name for a medium.

Woman in the blue is not great at first. She kept looking at the camera. Her character knows she’s being filmed, but it still.

That’s a lot of police resources to keep a police car out front everyday. 

“Not a trained professional paranormal investigator.”  How does one go about becoming a professional paranormal investigator? Do you have to take classes?  Is there a test?  A certificate at the end?

Putting a rock against the door to keep it open is one of the smartest things in all of these movies.

Seeing a random person standing on the stairs and then not immediately leaving, is not smart. Although I think it was supposed to be a ghost thing.

Random latin on the wall trope, check.

Heard a noise and went to investigate, check.  The door was open. It could be an animal or a homeless person.

Do not stop to pick up a hitchhiker.  Just don’t.

What are the ghost rules?  They were just in the house. Now they’re on the side of the road luring people in? Well, I guess Sarah did lure them back to the hotel in the first movie. At least they’re consistent. 

Don’t go after her.  The place is creepy and that woman isn’t right.  If you’re that worried, call for help. You don’t follow her into the abandoned haunted place.

The teen in the booth next to the weird dancing couple is staring directly at the camera.

Don’t give Molly shit about not wanting to go inside. 

They’re searching for a way in, but every other person has just sauntered in through a wide open door.

Don’t trust that wood piece in the door. Looks like it would slip out.

Why did Brock need to go to Abaddon with the film crew? He could have gone whenever?

Old timey portraits of children are inherently unnerving.

Random nooses equal get the fuck out.

The evil clown mannequins are back.

“Grab a box and start digging.” - Nope.  You take those boxes outside and read them out in the daylight like smart people.

The pan to the woman staring at them is a great example of simple scares being highly efficient.

You’ve put a time limit on your excursion into the basement. Why waste time reading the menu?

Creepy clown walking around - world of nope.

Sending the guy by himself? These people don’t watch horror movies and it shows.

Ghosts can impersonate people now?  These technological ghosts are impressive.

She’s fighting him on leaving. He warned you multiple times that they might all have to leave at a moment’s notice. Why are they acting surprised when he insists you leave?

Fuck Brock. He’s a grown man that you didn’t even want to come along.

Fuck that clown. He’s creepy AF. Just that slow movement was all I needed to send chills down my spine.

Mitchell, you've been smart up till now. Don’t stop now.

All that ghost women did was blink.  I would have run away too.

Theorizing the ghosts were compelling Alex to stay in the hotel fits. 

Are they in a room with no windows? Why not go out the window? If there isn’t a window, that’s a major safety violation.

Ghosts fucking with them on the walkie talkie, chef kiss.

So who supposedly is filming the meeting with Alex? Maybe the ghosts are trying to start their own reality show.

Why is he writing on those tapes with a dry erase marker?

That thing at the door looks like an off brand Leather Face.

Now the ghosts are leaving notes? But you were doing so well with the tech.

Molly’s with the clowns now.  Her sacrifice was worthy.  You move the fuck along.

The wall breaking open to show the lake of fire was okay. CGI is not their friend.

But that clown slowly moving towards them is.

Mentioned Russell Wynn. Set up the 3rd movie in the 2nd one. Good for them.

So did the ghosts cause the accident involving the real Arnold?

Arnold being Andrew Tulley was great.

“Pick up the camera.” They really want their own show.

Anytime you bring religion into it, the fright factor goes up.

Should have let the clown have Molly.  Now she dies slowly from a stab to the abdomen. 

So was Tulley trolling the internet looking for gullible people to send Hell House information too? How many other people have they contacted?

Killing her off camera is more effective than showing the murder.

Were the ghosts true to their word? Did they let Mitchell leave after he made his choice?

Anytime someone in a horror movie says “Do you trust me?” the automatic answer should be no.