[locustsummer]

wtf happened to this screenshot

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

you're reading it from the line cook's perspective

[escuerzoresucitado]

[jokeboy-deactivated20260221]

accidentally told a customer the wrong price and like the little f slur I am I said "oopsie! I lied to you hold on" and she without any pause said "all liars go to hell" 😐🫡

[darkcomedies-deactivated2022042]

idk man this DnD shit is easy

[darkcomedies-deactivated2022042]

[rod1on]

u guys will watch anything wtf is wednesday

[redshifting]

its tomorrow innit?

[marisatomay]

happy wednesday is tomorrow innit tuesday

[exitwound]

i could recognize him by penis alone

[depsidase]

[vaportea]

the notes of this post are absolute comedy gold

[stupidbeecandle]

Im going to miss the way i used to eat gently and trustingly from the waitstaffs cupped hands.

[poemjunkie]

Throwback to that time in college when me and a group of friends were having an all-day Lord of the Rings marathon, and during the scene where the Fellowship is fighting the giant squid and Aragorn does something awesome, I turned to my friend and was like,

“Strider is so hot.”

Strider being one of Aragorn’s in-universe nicknames, for the uninitiated.

And one of the guys in the group, who I had never met before, was like “WHAT? Really???” with enormous eyes.

“Uh, yeah?”

I look to my friend, who makes confirmation noises. I look at some of the other girls, more confirmation noises.

Guy, now looking very uncomfortable, but realizing he made some kind of misstep: “Oh. I mean. Whatever you’re into, I guess. That’s fine.”

Me: “Okay??”

Then a SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF TIME LATER, either I make another comment or someone in the film calls Aragorn Strider, I can’t remember the context, and the guy goes: “OH! Strider is Aragorn. Okay. Okay.”

Me: “Who tf did you think I was talking about??”

Guy: “The squid.”

[renegade-hierophant-deactivated]

Advice from 4500 years ago.

[the-real-numbers-deactivated202]

I like ths translation. “it would be wise of you to remember this”

[beckrl]

[sealwomen-deactivated20231204]

“she just died, try to have some respect, she was a human being” that sure is a lot of words to tell me you’re not indian or pakistani or bangladeshi or irish or welsh or scottish or jamaican or west indian or kenyan or south african or zimbabwean or working class or princess diana

[tanadrin]

they did it, the lunatics. minecraft in minecraft. there’s something intensely philosophically delightful to me to look at an image of a three-dimensional space and know that it is a double abstraction, data distributed on hardware that is itself only data distributed on hardware.

[bibliolithid]

“Video sped up roughly 2,000,000x”

[tanadrin]

it’s vanilla minecraft without command blocks, but they are running a server version designed to speed up redstone processessing enormously. even so they said the conversion rate for memory is about 2 gb -> 277 bytes. so not exactly a high-performance system!

[triviallytrue]

here’s a video on the prototype of what they made it on. dear lord

[funnytwittertweets]

[kari-hehe]

so please don’t

[ryebreadgf]

influencers are insane

[funnytwittertweets]

[thebigcomed0wn]

putting “lying to kids is ok” on the table immediately looks bad. but theres nuance. because kids deserve to have as much context and respect as anyone else you live with. but also. telling them that leaving doors open will make ants carry away the entire house is necessary until their brains can quantify the heating&air bill

[thyrell]

this is the funniest divorce in the world