[funnytwittertweets]

[hannahhillam]

[starsberrisnunicorns]

Did the cat just give–

[teenagerposts]

this is the wholesome pure content we need more of

[pollytipsy]

[redmachasacorns-deactivated2018]

Not a single lie in sight……

[atthedreamersball]

john mulaney is a horrible person. wake up guys. stop reblogging posts about him. stop supporting him. he is a despicable person. seriously. he SAW what they were doing to tyler and he did nothing. tell me, how is he better than a nazi?

[calculusty]

well you see he was over there on the bench

[zerostatereflex]

An Octopus unscrewing a lid from the inside.

[we-are-star-stuff]

Octopuses are going to kill us all someday

[daikiraichu]

I had a biology teacher that told us this story about an octopus at an aquarium in Australia. The staff were concerned because their population of crustaceans kept disappearing. No bodies or anything. So they checked the video feed to find out what’s up.

Across from the the crustacean tank was a small octopus tank. This little fucker squeezed out of a tiny hole at the top of his tank, walk across the hall, and get into the crustacean tank. He would then hunt and eat. After he was done, he crawled back out and get back in his tank

Here’s the kicker: security guards patrolled the area. The staff realized that the octopus had memorized the security’s routine. It would escape and be back between the guards’ round.

[twenty-four-robbers]

My friend who worked at Henry Doorly Zoo in Omaha, Nebraska had a similar story.  Rare fish were disappearing, they suspected theft, and so set up a camera. An octopus was unlocking the top of its tank, walking across the suspended walkway, unlocking the other tank, eating his fill, re-locking the other tank, then re-locking its own tank.

[magic-retina-deactivated2017100]

I can’t remember what zoo this happened at, but there was another octopus somewhere who was unscrewing a water valve in the room where its tank was located and routinely flooding the place. The staffers had no idea what it was until they filmed the octopus caught in the act.

[gamzees-hole]

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!! But, sir, it has already released itself!

[canisfamiliaris]

Octopus Steals Video Camera, Films Own Escape

Octopus Escapes from Tank to Prowl on its Neighbors

Octopus Escape — 600-pound (272-kilogram) octopus wriggles through a passageway the size of a quarter

Legging It: Evasive Octopus Has Been Allowed to Look for Love

Octopus Escapes through Small Hole in Ship

[pomegranateandivy-deactivated20]

My dad worked in a lab and one of the rooms had a tank with an octopus in it. If they didn’t go play with the octopus he got bored and would climb out of his tank and steal the paperwork off the desks, and drag stuff into his tank to let the scientists know he was upset with them.

[friendshipismax]

Let them be free! 

[spiffy202]

I read a story where after this octopus was feed shrimp, it found one that was bad. So it let himself out of his tank and walked across the building to the office of the guy who fed him and threw the bad shrimp at him and walked back to his tank

[yeezy-nation]

[moodyspacebabe-deactivated20180]

Whoever is making these videos… please… keep making more

[vaginatrainer-deactivated202007]

When he pulls down his pants and you’re not sure if you can handle it

[andhumanslovedstories]

Hottest of hot takes, Heimdall is literally the only competent Asgardian, he’s the only one, he’s the entirety of the functioning government

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

Odin: (Goes off to Norway to die)

Thor: (Laying facedown in garbage) I LIVE HERE NOW

Loki: (Getting drunk with the Grandmaster) WHEN IT’S TIME TO PARTY I WILL ALWAYS PARTY HARD

Asgard: (ON FIRE)

Heimdall: (actually rescuing people from Hela’s rule, sheltering hundreds or maybe thousands of refugees, keeping her from accessing the bifrost, dealing with Evil Skeletons) NO ONE EVER HELPS ME IN THIS FUCKIN HOUSE

[richtide]

it doesn’t matter how good you’re doing, those sad nights will creep up on you from time to time and that’s ok. doesn’t mean all your progress is gone

[chalamet-x]

i’m dying that robert downey jr posted this on his official facebook 😂😂😂 

[imageof1love]

She seriously thought it was a joke until he and her people convinced her it’s for real.

[cerebralgemini-deactivated20181]

Wholesome😢😍

[realhotgirlsht-deactivated20220]

Wow I actually teared up she’s the cutest

[square-enix]

is anyone else just going through life like “yeah i just gotta get past this last difficult week and then it’s smooth sailing from there!” but like… every week

[meme-theft]

[stchewpidcewpid]

Literally the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen

[krabby-kronicle]

[gayclair-deactivated20180310]

y'all ever hear a song and just. immediately adopt it into your aesthetic and self like “oh this,, this is me now,,, my whole identity,, is this song”

[ulibeanzz]

ppl who hate wearing socks to bed what have U got to lose?? why deny urself warmth and comfort??

[puds-archive]

but me feets overheats

[creepyuncledon-deactivated20180]

I am currently in love with this video.

[d0esntmakesense]

love this new disney movie

[ganjflavoredcleats-deactivated2]

^^^^^^^^^

[molothoo]

What that dog know about the blues 😂😂

[badgyal-k-deactivated20190901]

Ok but how does the puppy like… know, you know? How do they know???