[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

thinking about all the disrespect I allowed because I just wanted to feel loved.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

disappointed, but not surprised.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

hi, again.

rambling back to old writings and things these memories in words still cutting in deep

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

there's no words to describe the feelings of when a person leaves you when you're carrying his child. no describable words. you're left with nothing but memories and the best gift ever my heart is empty and heavy all at once.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

i just want to be so in love with someone who's so in love with me.

[wnq-anonymous]

Sometimes you end up never speaking to someone who meant the world to you. And that’s okay. You cope and you survive. Don’t let your losses keep you back from new gains.

Anonymous (via wnq-anonymous)

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

it was just a matter of time before you left. your silence spoke so much volume and my feelings were so loud; we just couldn't bare it anymore.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

and all i could ever replay is, "I'll never love you. I choose to not be involve with you." and baby, everything we shared, all the secrets, all the love and care, will never be the same again.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

and there you were, a surprise to fill my heart even more. another blessing added to my life, another miracle that saved my whole entire world. you are so loved beyond measures already.

[blackcoffee-speysidewhisky]

I thought I could take a step back and let you breathe, let go for a little bit so that you could find your way back to me, on your own. I loosened my grip and gave you your space because I wanted you to come running back to me the second you realized that you might be losing me. I don’t know what runs through your mind or if your seconds are spent thinking about me, but it might be safe to say that I waited a little too long for me to try and make you stay.

c.f. // “I think I just lost him” (via flannelsandthecoffeebar)

[thelovejournals]

We are sitting on your bed, there is distance between us and the silence is suffocating me. I am holding my knees to my chest. My body is shaking; you are quiet. I ask you if you still love me, and you tell me that you are not sure that you ever did.

Mariah Gordon-Dyke, The Best, and the Worst Day (via wnq-anonymous)

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

and I woke up today, knowing I don't want you like how I eagerly searched for you in so many people over and over again I am simply nothing as you become to me

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

and when you leave, all i will ever have, are the photographs of you of me inside that little space between the high school and fosters im going to terribly miss you miss us mostly you in what will seem like forever.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

Truth is, I miss you. I miss all the little things that you probably don’t even remember. But, I guess that’s what separates us apart. I realized and appreciated all the little things you did for me, while you were too busy expecting too much out of me.

[vodkapoetry]

I’m so obsessed with the idea of being in love that I just, it’s like I completely lose myself. Like, I forget what I want and I just disappear.

How To Be Single (2016)

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

"Leave me alone. Don't call me, don't text me, don't bother me. You understand?" He said. "Ok" I responded. "Ok" click. that was the last thing he said and that's the last time I will allow him to ever hurt me again.

[ramblingsofanoverthinker]

You made your bed with me, simply by using me to your advantage-emotionally, physically and wanted nothing else to do with me. You make/made me feel like the dirtiest person in the world and you definitely ruined my pride. When they say damaged people are really damaged, I never knew how much your damaged heart, soul and even as a person could ever damaged my way of life. I gave you the benefit of the doubt because I thought saw something better than some broken kid living in the past but you surely continued to prove me wrong that no matter how fucked up your past is, it still sits, eating and haunting you. I know because every day I fucking wonder why I continued the toxic friendship I had with you. But you know what though, God has eyes and he saw my heart in everything I did. I placed our friendship above all things in my life because I felt like you needed me, but really it was me who needed you and that’s ok, because with every blocked pathway I got with you, I learned, and with that, I can so freely say, I took your advice and moved on with my life.

I no longer care for someone who keeps people are arms length, I no longer enjoy the late night drives to your apartment and drive back home an hour away, I no longer want to infuse my life with someone who is so damaged that they vibe off any sort of negativity into mine. I no longer want to know if you’re ok because at the end of the day, that cycle of yours, will make you ok and you burned this bridge when you said our friendship ended when I lost my job months ago, that right there proved everything in our friendship that you used me to your advantage from that point forward and that in someway, gave me the strength to walk away from you.

I hope in some ways California will travel with you where ever you go because you’ve left marks here in areas I will never forget and I’ll be the one looking back at it as you rise yourself and leave this part of your life behind just so easily as you left me.

Good luck, I will always think highly of you because some where in that damaged soul, heart and mind, I still see a brighter light, some day it will shine. I hope that you remember the best parts of me and our friendship rather than the worst parts and dysfunctional ending of it all.