STOP SHOVING THINGS UP YOUR TAIL PIPES DAMN IT

[ Currently on hiatus ]

[ratchet-standing]

I can't believe I have to do this

[ratchet-standing]

[ Ratchet is currently on vacation as the Mod is taking a hiatus for a while. Hope to be back soon! ]

[ratchet-standing]

[optima-standing]

This is an important message to all beings following me.

Some of you may have already heard of this, but I feel it is necessary to make an official announcement on my own as well.

I am a trans woman. This is not a realization I have made lightly, but rather the culmination of many things I have been feeling for a long while. From now, I wish to be referred to with "she/her" pronouns, as well as the name "Optima". If you have been wondering why I have started signing off as "Optima", this is why.

I hope this is not too much of a shock to anyone. It may seem sudden, considering how carefully I have been keeping this to myself for days now, but it has truly been a long time coming.

Thank you all, my fellow Cybertronians and other sentient beings.

-Optima Prime :-)

[ratchet-standing]

This is great news, Prime. I'm glad you've figured this out. Let me know if there's ever anything I can do for you, mech-- errr... I mean femme.

[ratchet-standing]

Greetings, Autobot Ratchet. I am a human who has been keeping up with you and your fellow Cybertronian's "standing" blogs, and as a human who is unfamiliar with the intricacies of Cybertronian culture, I am curious about something you have said.

If a Cybertronian wanted to change their frame type from mech to femme, or vice versa, what would the process look like? I have recently found out that we humans can do a similar thing, and am curious of the overlap.

-Anonymous :-)

Greetings... Anonymous human. Well, truth be told, the process is relatively complex, and I don't think I can possibly explain it all over the human internet. However, if you were to come to me privately off of Anon, I would be more than happy to explain the procedures.

[ratchet-standing]

I-I heard you have a hose.?

...I'll run you a bubble bath, Cosmos.

[ratchet-standing]

Urm. Doc? Do ya remember when ya said to not... Shove anything down our tailpipes? So about that...

[hello, I hope you'll enjoy our first interaction >:D]

Damn it Cliffjumper! Don't I have enough to deal with?? Sigh, bend over.

Sometimes I wonder why you're Optimus' favourite...

[ratchet-standing]

Ratchet what are you going to do about the two seekers you pronounce dead? Are you going to like incinerate them?? Or inspect them or????

Well, I suppose it's up to if they have any relatives/next of kin willing to come forward and claim them. If not, well... I suppose they'd be given a proper Cybertronian funeral - or sent off into space. Who knows. There's not a lot of point in inspecting them, since their deaths were... Widely witnessed.

If I had to guess, I'd say Thundercracker will claim the bodies... Poor mech.

[ratchet-standing]

[ratchet-standing]

Sowhatwouldonetheroeticallydoiftheyseemtobemergingwithapreviouslyassumeddeadteammate?

@blurr-standing

Blurr and.. I guess Blurr's headmate, I'm gonna level with you. I have no fragging idea. I don't even know how you managed that. Now I'm no expert, but you may want to try a human exorcism.

[blurr-standing]

Waitwaitwait,wouldn'tthatjust..getridofthem? I don't- Istillwannaexist. None of this wasactuallyintentional-

[blurr-standing]

Ithoughtyouwere a botofscience?

[ratchet-standing]

Listen, I'm a bot of science and very limited resources and time. Forgive me, I had to pronounce the death of like, two seekers today. But okay, I'll help you. How exactly did this happen?

[thundercracker-standing]

[acidstorm-standing]

Hey. TC just your fellow seeker here delivering some delightful eggs filled with acid and plastic explosives for this Earth holiday

[thundercracker-standing]

WHA--

Ok you know what I'll take them. Maybe they will come in useful someday

[blurr-standing]

DON'TTAKETHEM,THEY'REONATIMER

[thundercracker-standing]

I'll GIVE THEM TO STARSCREAM!!!!

AHHHHH @starscream-standing come get some free easter eggs!!!!!!!!

[starscream-standing]

STARSCREAM DIDNT YOU JUST HEAR WHAT THEY WHERE SAYING DONT-

Oh...

Someone get a medic...

[ultra-magnus-standing]

Although you are my enemy, this seems needed @ratchet-standing.

[ratchet-standing]

....Mechs, I don't know if I can help you here. I'm a good medic, but he's lost 75% of his body. I'm sorry for your loss.

[ratchet-standing]

Sowhatwouldonetheroeticallydoiftheyseemtobemergingwithapreviouslyassumeddeadteammate?

@blurr-standing

Blurr and.. I guess Blurr's headmate, I'm gonna level with you. I have no fragging idea. I don't even know how you managed that. Now I'm no expert, but you may want to try a human exorcism.

[ratchet-standing]

[standing-nightbird]

Ratchet how about a truce? I'll be willing to learn medical information to assist you if you teach me stuff about Cybertron.

[ratchet-standing]

Oh thank Primus. At this point, I'll take any help I can get. Start as soon as you can, I'll give you anything. Please

[ratchet-standing]

Ratchet!!!l Skywarp just got his HEAD blown off!! He's dying you gotta same him! No bot knows what to do!

Primus, Skywarp again?? I don't even know what I can do about that!! Frag, bring him to the Medbay and I'll weld it back on or something!! This profession is a prison.

[optima-standing]

Greetings, humans. I come to wish you a happy "Easter", which is a human holiday I have been made aware of.

Sadly, I am still stuck in the backrooms, so I will be unable to participate in any egg hunts. Perhaps next year. In the meantime, to any who read this, please enjoy your day and be glad you are able to traverse the outside world, as opposed to being trapped in an endlessly looping maze of yellow carpets and occasional irregular pool rooms.

-Prime :-)

[ratchet-standing]

[ratchet-standing]

[acidstorm-standing]

Hey, medic. It's an earth holiday where people collect delightful hand painted eggs. Please take some. They are acid bombs 💚

*flies off*

[ratchet-standing]

Damn Decepticon, what am I supposed to do with this?? Get back here!!