vabè @ravekidsgo - Tumblr Blog

I don’t like this life cause it’s too stressful and hateful and uncomfortable and I don’t like so many situations cause I don’t like myself and I don’t like the others

I feel im irreparably broken, I will never heal completely from the things that hurt me. Im forever compromised, ill never be able to function properly after this last one

I’m afraid i’m forever compromised

ravekidsgo

Last time we slept together

ravekidsgo

As we can see he wouldn’t even hold me in his arms anymore when we were sleeping together. Sometimes he held me while having sex, it wasn’t love anymore I could feel that so much.

It hurts

so much

thinking that as we broke up he started holding another one like he used to do with me.

It hurts

so much

because it was literally not even a week after we broke up.

I think so many things and

I hate you

so much

I wish I was strong enough to beat you.

All of this because maybe it’s just my problem, I can’t deal with the fact that you stopped loving me so easily, I can’t believe that after all the things you told me.

But I also hate you cause you took advantage of me, as I was giving more and more trying to fix your lack of care you were asking for even more.

And then just “enough. I need to be alone. You deserve more”.

Yea I can see that. Alone. On holiday with her.

As if you didn’t tell me you had no time to spend with a girlfriend because it would be a waste of time even for going one day to the beach and you didn’t care at all about the holidays.

I

FUCKING

HATE YOU.

One day you’ll get everything back, one day I hope someone will make you suffer like you make the others suffer. Then you’ll understand how terrible you are.

I need time to be full time sad u kno, it’s not enough to live the sadness just in the free time

etherqueen-deactivated20160417

when your mental illness starts acting up again

I would fuck me a lot btw

Last time we slept together

#me

I can’t help but being sad, how the hell is life when you’re really happy? I feel like i’m never worth it and never enough as a person.

Only thing I know atm is she’s very beautiful, much more than me im just pretty (soon to be ugly and fat cause im frustrated), but probably way smarter than her like im smarter than most people. Conscoiusness always makes you sadder.

Oh, and updates are that when he broke up with me definetely on a thursday, two days after he got back fucking the girl he cheated me on with lol, now they’re on holidays in France together (where we were planning to go).

Funny how he broke up telling me he couldn’t find the time for another person in his life and he couldn’t give me what I deserved because I loved him too much when he needed to focus on work and his career.

I tell you what, it’s so simple, my life’s a joke lol hopefully I’m gonna die one day

Restarting life today

#me

I’d really like to post more on tumblr and I think I need it, but my phone hates me so I can’t keep the app due to full storage.

Anyways, I’m sad as always, life suck at its fullest, love doesn’t exist. We broke up like a couple of weeks ago, his decision, it’s really hard to let it go, I really don’t accept it, I literally can’t atm, I still want him and I want to have a lot of sex.

My god if it hurts, why the hell do they always leave? what the hell is wrong with me i don’t understand why they don’t want to keep me.