Crystal Jasmin @readingatthebeach - Tumblr Blog

danger

I Had a Flashback of Something that Never Existed from “Ode à l'oubli” 2002

Louise Bourgeois

I love you.

The words are forced and sting my ears. They pierce my soul leaving a stinging throbbing pain.

They drip down, dark red and vile.

I love you too.

#poetry #heartbreak #love

#poetry #beautiful #poem

Drops of Her

She was the girl that hid her feelings. The one that became a great pretender. People envied the way she smiled and lived gracefully, carelessly.

She was the girl who was broken deep inside. Demons dwelled within They roared and thrashed and scratched. Occasionally They made tears and would drip out.

She was a great actress.

She always believed in happy endings. In love with the idea of love. The idea that people could be saved despite being the one that needed saving.

She never thought the world could crumble. The leaves, flowers, clouds, streets, Appeared Concrete, but there were cracks, fissures of imperfection that were ignored.

She was blind.

She became infatuated with daydreams replayed so often, they became a Reality. The earth crumbled, furious that it had been replaced. Destroying everything it could– to get attention.

She remained frozen in time. Stuck in daydreams not knowing that everything was Lost. They had discovered a new way to escape.

She was never herself.

She had never repressed the screeches.

She never knew.

She was trying to escape.

C. J. B.

#poetry #first poetry post #creative writing #poem #poets on tumblr

Flashbacks

Do you remember the night you met my brother? The night that I went with him to visit his girlfriend and you picked me up? We drove somewhere and parked…?

Yes I do

I drove by that place today and I remembered that night.

I remember that night quite vividly.

What else do you remember?

I remember everything.

02.13.17

Here I am. Three years after my last post. I don’t know where to start… I’m a teacher now. I graduated three months ago with my bachelors degree. Somehow, this achievement felt like it would never get here. But here I am. I moved forward in life yet I feel like I took a step back. I’ve been married now for almost three years. He’s a great man that took in my children as his own. I thought this was it: my forever was finally here.

A couple months ago it started to get bad. We had been trying to get pregnant since we married. It felt like it would never happen. But, at last, I got pregnant. We were happy and nervous. Now that I was pregnant, it was scary! We were still overjoyed.

It lasted two days.

I came home from work exhausted and ready to take a nap. I decided to get in Pinterest instead (because Pinterest was more important). I was looking at pregnancy announcements when I shifted in my chair. I felt a bubble and my heart dropped. I ran to the bathroom to make sure I was okay. I wiped. I was good. I let out a sigh of relief. I wiped again.

Bright red blood.

No.

“This happens sometimes,” I told myself. I was so wrong. Over the next week, I bled and cramped. It was thanksgiving week. I suffered in silence. My baby was dead and I had to pretend to be happy. I had to be ‘thankful.’ My husband never mentioned it again. I never got to grieve. I bought a necklace with the November birthstone in memory of my child that never was.

I think that’s when things changed for me. I wasn’t the same person. I was unhappy and I felt as though something was missing. I started working in January and I also started grad school. I kept busy. It helped keep the thoughts at bay.

My mind began to wander during my lunch breaks. Why? What was I expecting to find that I didn’t already have? The more I tried to repress them, the stronger they became…

#miscarriage loss

A very traumatic five months

These last five months had completely drained her. She had felt like a deflated balloon. What had happened? She had been so fun in the preceding months. Her face had even aged. She was a different person.

theyuniversity

Source: Grammar.net

lolfactory

theneetboss-deactivated20150824

stepping on something mushy and unidentified

elliottsalderson-deactivated201

How to Eat Cole Slaw

Throw it in the trash.

by-grace-of-god

Edit: Found more details here, professor is Sydney Engelberg of Hebrew University, Jerusalem

taylorswiftville

Bringing a baby to class is so completely disrespectful of the other students who are spending thousands of dollars to go to school only to have their learning disrupted by the most horrible sound on earth. This woman is incredibly selfish.

emiliaskhaleesi-deactivated2018

are you kidding me? this woman needs an education too, especially since she now has a child to take care of. yes, she brought her baby to class, but do you honestly think she would have done that if she had any other option? she’s not being selfish, she’s trying to simultaneously get an education while raising a baby. and just as a side note, “other students who are spending thousands of dollars” yeah she’s a student too meaning she’s also spending those thousands of dollars.

caniscaballus

as a student, i would much rather my fellow classmates brought their kids with them than miss an important class. a child is nothing compared to all the other distractions in a classroom, i s2g. half of the time, i see more than 50% of my fellow classmates on their phones or laptops instead of paying attention to a prof (and i’m guilty of being one of them) so why in the hell is a baby more “disrupting” than someone playing candy crush?? and she was going to leave when the child started geetting restless but the prof CHOSE to help her out so she could stay. THAT IS AWESOME!!!

i went to school with my mom when she was in college all the time. i sat in lit classes, chinese history, etc. granted, i was like 8 or 9 at the time and played pokemon all the way through but having a kid should NOT prevent any parent from getting their education and i’m glad to see this prof take it in stride and recognize that student parents are under SO MUCH PRESSURE to get through school and handle their family at the same time.

girlwithalessonplan

I remember seeing preschool age kids sitting in on my classes because the nontraditional students couldn’t get babysitters on days the preK or daycare was closed. One time I shared my colored pencils with a little girl. Profs never said a word about it when it happened–except one who cracked a joke about watching his language on that day. I’d rather work with the single mom or dad who has to bring a kid to a study session than a fratboi dudebro who just wants to copy all my notes any damn day. (True story.)

wunderlass

The original story even says the professor encourages the students to bring their children to class - probably because he’d rather they turned up than have to skip due to a lack of alternative childcare.