Stop being obsessed with who and what I am not. Be proud to be myself
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@rebornreborn
Stop being obsessed with who and what I am not. Be proud to be myself
I acc don’t have any close enough friends to tell this to lol. Maybe my gay friend in US. He’d prob understand. And our other mate. But it’s something to say in person. I’m leaving no receipts of this wretched ailment
Sooo anxious this afternoon lol. Prob cos I just sent out a contract
He said he likes a confident woman that’s doing her damn ting. That’s me. I’ve been killing it at work. I’m ‘beautiful’. I’m smart I’m all these other words he called me. But I’m still not enough.
Our last date was literally so wonderful…
All people ever want from me is sex and I can’t even offer that anymore. lol. Ok
‘Beautiful’, ‘intelligent’ woman like me walking around incapable of anyone remotely sane loving her. Now with h*erpes on top. My life is a sick joke. Just hit after hit after hit. I barely even have sex, this is genuinely so unfortunate. Everything is so shit.
No one wants me and no one ever will now. I actually feel so sad. I taught reassurance, was direct but thoughtful, checked in, made space for him and his quirks. Just to get thrown to the side. He ain’t want me. He wants some quiet Chinese girl. Telling me he’s never met anyone like me. I’m sure he won’t want to again. I feel so stupid
Honestly I’m surprised I haven’t had a full menty b this week.
I was so patient and accommodating of him. And what do I get for it. Dumped on a Friday night but told I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong and I’m a fantastic woman.
I can’t believe I thought I was gonna find love. I’m so stupid. What a terrible week this has been for me
Life was finally good, dating someone nice, and just found out I (most likely) have the big H. Scratch that, small H lol.
I already find dating impossible and this is guaranteed to make it even harder 👍🏾
I was saying the cognitive dissonance I’m feeling is mad cause I understand it’s not that deep at all on a scientific/macro level, but I’m still distraught for myself personally. Psych support nurse was basically like it’s okay to have an emotional response separate from your intellectual response.
Confirmed. My enemies have won
Life was finally good, dating someone nice, and just found out I (most likely) have the big H. Scratch that, small H lol.
I already find dating impossible and this is guaranteed to make it even harder 👍🏾
I was saying the cognitive dissonance I’m feeling is mad cause I understand it’s not that deep at all on a scientific/macro level, but I’m still distraught for myself personally. Psych support nurse was basically like it’s okay to have an emotional response separate from your intellectual response.
Life was finally good, dating someone nice, and just found out I (most likely) have the big H. Scratch that, small H lol.
I already find dating impossible and this is guaranteed to make it even harder 👍🏾
My sister and I both in agreement that my mum just needs to pass to free herself and us from the bullshit cos nothing is ever gonna change
See I feel silly cos I’m here thinking about him, wanting to be w him, might even have a wank. Meanwhile he just thinks about work and yoga and me once in a blue moon 😩
My man works in PE n is always so fucking busy. Clearly I’m not Nigerian enough cos my love of money does not supersede my yearning for quality time 😩
Also trying to work out if I’m ok w his autistic traits of not missing me, easily saying no to me, never answering questions simply (lol) and not yearning for me!
He said he hasn’t wanked thinking of me cos that’s not how his brain works and I’m offended!
He’s also only nut ONCE out of the maybe 4 times now we’ve fucked? He’s said he doesn’t have to orgasm to enjoy sex but fucking hell mate give a dog a bone here
Mind you I do really like him. He’s sweet and smart and fit and handsome and a gentleman. He always says he’s simple and there isn’t much to know about him, but that isn’t true and kinda frustrated me lol. I can feel his cool temperament may end up making me feel a bit insecure or unsure of where I sit in his heart. We spoke about this yesterday but I was mindful of not wanting to sound needy or scare him away lol