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Cosmic Funnies

titsay
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shark vs the universe
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Janaina Medeiros

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Jules of Nature
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@redheaderi
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((Geez it’s been so long since I’ve been here! I was so caught up with my other blogs I forgot about this one.
Also some real life stuff came up so I’ll have to put this and Brian on hiatus until further notice.))
There was only a small moment to collect his thoughts once more. This child was a complete failure at taking the hint. She didn’t have any respect for the grunt, that much was clear. So much so to waste her breathe on banter that broke her chances of knowing Cole into pieces. Whether she knew it or not, she was just using him in the end for her own selfish desire. He wouldn’t have minded it so much if she would at least listen to him. That was the deciding factor for his next set of actions.
Rising up after half a minute of silence, Cole pocketed his flask, and turned to face his dog. His actions were about to very quickly change from tolerance to hostility.
“Ares. Take the lead as ordered.”
Out of the grunt’s black jacket came a pokeball, followed by a bright flash of light. His sword pokemon took form, ready for anything.
“Honedge, that girl is a Rattata–a pest. Stay at my back, and keep that piece of trash at least twenty feet from us. Non-lethal force approved.”
Cole and his pokemon had positioned themselves accordingly. Houndoom had quickly taken off ahead, with the drunkard and his Honedge slowly closing in. As quickly as he had accepted the girl, he was already wanting to forget her. Someone with such a weak resolve and will wasn’t even worthy of meeting him.
When the grunt began to reveal signs of hostility, the redhead stepped back, regretting her words. He released a Honedge, which she had never seen before. Despite being amazed, Eri was shocked that he ordered them to keep her at a distance. She was used to being deemed as annoying, but never threatened like this. This guy really did not want to get close. She never intended to fulfill any selfish desires either.
Thankfully Sakura the Espeon was not outside of her Pokeball to read Cole’s thoughts. If she knew what he thought about her trainer, she would have fumed. The psychic-type rarely got angry unless her trainer came to harm.
“WHAT?!?!” Exclaimed the confused redhead, fuming inwardly. All this over a small thing? Grumbling under her breath, she took a deep breath to calm herself. Crossing her arms, she huffed. “Fine! Be that way! I’ll just take another path. Like this one!” The girl stormed off onto a different path apart from his. He never stated that he knew how to navigate the forest, so she figured it was best to try a different route. This also gave her time to collect her thoughts.
Cole snapped his fingers, and his Houndoom came to his side. He needed a quick rest before he could continue on any farther. Like earlier, he was now sitting against the trunk of a wet tree catching his breathe.
Besides, it would just be easier to say what he had to say without having to yell at her.
“Stop…just stop talking already kid.”
Ares shortly after, had positioned himself between his master and the young girl. His gloomy eyes didn’t want her coming any closer to the grunt. Even Cole’s Houndoom understood that he was getting sick and tired of this girl.
“Why should I give you respect if you cannot even respect me? You said you wouldn’t be a pest and ‘never bother me again’. You cannot even go by your own, simple promise. You can say all those nice words and keep up that facade in a bad attempt to get me to open up and return the kindness. It doesn’t change one, simple, truth: you’re breaking your own oath every time you speak to me.”
After a moment to pause and drink, he pulled out his umbrella again. The clouds were starting to bundle up once more, this time into a giant, deep grey mess. It didn’t seem like it would be a small drizzle this time. The last thing Cole wanted was for Ares to be stuck out in the rain again.
“If you really cared and wanted to please me, you would have just shut the fuck up and walked without making a sound. Don’t say anything to me at this point. I won’t respond. You’re not remotely worth even looking at now.”
Eri perked at him snapping his fingers. When the hound rushed to his side, she noticed they were heading towards a nearby tree. Thinking the boys were tired, she checked her Xtransceiver. It was not dinner time yet. Good.
Following them towards the wet tree, she halted half way from him. Then he told her to stop talking. Eri gulped, registering his demand. The optimistic expression faded. Her irritation bubbled to the surface.
“What?” Annoyance laced her voice. She had become a different person.
Baby blue hues narrowed as Houndoom stepped protectively in front of him. His tone was harsh. Inquiring his name was bothersome? It was just a question! She kept her promise too! It was almost as if he deemed her inquiry as an offense. Asking him to assist her turned out to be a bad idea.
Watching him drink and pull out an umbrella, she briefly looked up at the sky. Above them, the size of the clouds worried her a little. Not that it mattered because she had her own umbrella. Crossing her arms, she replied.
“Look man I kept my oath. I was just trying to lighten the mood. When we met, I was excited to make a new friend. But you’re just acting like a jerk. If you told me your name I would’ve shut up. Even if you won’t admit it, you were nice enough to let me follow you. But I ain’t gonna shut up cause you want me to.”
“Do not even pretend that we are on the same level. The only thing that we share is that we are both human. Everything else between the two of us is separated by at least a mile. You cannot pinpoint one similarity between us, let alone live up to your own words. If you cannot even do something as simple as speak the truth, then sew your mouth shut.”
Such a naive little shit this kid was. ‘I always remember the people I meet.’ What a joke. As far as Cole’s memory took him, the strong majority of the faces he saw and talked to were just John and Jane Does; completely forgettable. This one was no exception. He had already found those like her far too many times among his travels. Each and every one of them had the same sickening goals, same annoying personality. The grunt wouldn’t even be surprised if she wanted to battle him as soon as they left the woods.
Still tailing them, she thought it was weird that he refused to share his name. It was irksome. Unless something really ticked her off, anger was rare for her. As someone who used to work in customer service, she experienced many types of people. Most were forgettable, but some no. The redhead wanted and liked seeing the good in people. Thinking Cole’s harshness was meant to push her away, she wanted to avoid pissing him off.
“Dude everyone’s the same. But it’s kinda rude not to share your name when I did. You could at least pretend to be nice. You’re making it harder to make me forget you. And that’s the truth!” The redhead piped up. “I bet deep down you’re a nice guy with a big heart. Even your Houndoom’s happy with you.”
Dismissing the poor and outdated slang, Cole did take great pride in his pokemon. They were all well-trained and most of them well-mannered…most of them. Ares still had a long way to go before he was even given the privilege to be on the streets again. His overprotective dog had posed to be more than a problem at times.
The name thing was starting to dig into him a little. Why was it so important? Why did she feel the need to poke the Beedrill’s nest? He groaned a little from frustration before he shouted back to her.
“Why do you want to know my name so badly? What’s with your strange curiosity with me? You’ll just forget the basics by sunrise anyway. My name, my face, my clothing, the works. You’ll only remember me for what I did, and not for who I am.”
Using outdated slang seemed to amuse Eri. No one could comprehend her mind process. Perhaps it was because she was born in a time where new slang was beginning to emerge. She rarely heard anyone say “radical” or “groovy,” which sounded funny to her. Somehow she learned of and started using them for who knows what. She just wanted to lighten the mood.
When Cole questioned her, she blurted out again.
“No I won’t! I always remember the people I meet. Besides, I don’t wanna keeping calling you “mister.” I told you mine and it’s only fair if you tell me yours.” As she walked, she adjusted her yellow bag straps. “We’re equals!”
Man was she was desperate. Not the normal kind of desperation, but the kind that’s willing to grovel for a chance. Yes, this young girl was a pain in the ass, and someone who is not following the grunt’s basic philosophies (not that she knew them anyway). However, she was not intentionally causing him problems, and seemed she was willing to learn from her…mistakes. Cole sighed before speaking out his decision:
“Ares here is naturally hostile to strangers. Don’t get within ten feet of me or else he’ll probably attack you.”
He had arrived at his pokemon, who upon closer inspection had several small needles, thorns, and small seeds buried into his thin coat. Other than that, the Houndoom was unharmed. After briefly scratching the dog’s chin and had begun to trail off into some tall grass. Cole had begun to follow suit.
“If you’re coming, then walk. If you fall behind, I’m not coming back for you.”
Ten feet was a huge number. Deeming the hostility as excessive, the redhead sighed. Eri thought it was going to be difficult to track him. Due to his height, he had longer legs and was a fast walker. The way he acted proved he disliked her. Not everyone had to like her. Surprisingly he did not order his hound to kill her instantly. He probably comprehended that she wasn’t here to agitate him. Even if he was in uniform, she was unwilling to fight unless she had to.
Sadly complying to his request, she managed a dismal smile.
“Fiiiiine. But I still think your Pokemon’s pretty rad.” Glancing over at Ares for a second, she raised a brow at his blemished exterior. Seemed like it ran into some trouble. As the boys began walking, she followed them while keeping a distance. “Soooo...Are you sure you don’t wanna tell me your name?” She inquired out loud so he could hear. “Gotta know what to call you so I can thank you properly.”
It would seem she was a fool after all. He wasn’t enjoying himself, nor was he remotely acknowledging anything that she was saying as the truth. Simply by trying to see the good instead of bad, you’re already lying to yourself. And Cole despised liars.
“Don’t call me anything. After we part ways, I’ll go about my life as usual and most likely never see you again.”
Just as he was about to speak more about his own ideals in contrast to what he believed hers were, some bushes begun to shake in front of him. A black paw came out a second later, followed by the head and upper body of a Houndoom. Immediately upon confirming it was his pokemon, Cole stood up.
“I find your company annoying, and I will be taking my leave now. I must tend to my scouting party. They take far higher priority over a foolish stranger. Goodbye.”
Perhaps she was lying to herself, but she felt it was unnecessary to express any sign of depression. Even if she did get upset, she wound up laughing at herself in the end.
As she sighed, the sounds of a bustling bush perked her ears up. She spotted his Houndoom crawling out from the bush. Her eyes gleamed with excitement upon seeing the gallant-looking creature. Before she could question the ownership, his declaration shocked her a little. Was he gonna ditch her?!?!
“Wait!” Eri blurted out. “I didn’t mean to upset you. But I’m lost and I really, REALLY need to get to the next town! We don’t have to be friends, but I’d really appreciate it if you could help me out. I promise not to bother you again. Pretty please?”
“No. You have that completely backwards. People are naturally and undeniably selfish. To deny that fact is nothing short of foolish.”
There’s a large difference between facts and beliefs. It would seem that this child was trapped believing in these lies of inherit good behavior. However, his views were not black and white. Sure, Cole knew that people were slightly good, but the malevolence greatly outweighs that kindness.
Her second comment though…he didn’t even bother to respond to it. ‘Lighten up?’ ‘Being lost might be kinda fun?’ What a fuckin’ joke.
Evil dominating kindness was undeniable. Eri herself was not exactly kind-hearted either. Like most people, she had to fend for herself. That meant consuming resources and competing for first place at a yearly match. She wasn’t cruel, but knew were no such thing as “good people.” Regardless, she believed in bringing out the good in them.
The redhead shrugged and plopped next to him. “So? That’s why I always look at the bright side. I ain’t denying anything. By the way, mind telling me your name so I know what to call you?”
…Really? We’re going to be the whole ‘everybody is a friend’ type of person. The girl’s upbeat tone and actions weren’t working with Cole, especially since he wasn’t having the best day. This one gets two more minutes at most before he just outright leaves.
“Let’s just get two things cleared up. Number one: I don’t care about you, and you don’t care about me. Number two: names are for friends, so I don’t need one.”
Raising and angling his hand so rainwater didn’t drip into it, Cole quickly took a sip from his flask. He had a feeling he was going to need to be drunk to tolerate this shit.
Optimistic as she was, Eri was not the smartest crayon in the box. She just wanted people to be happy and thought Cole needed to crack a smile. Unfortunately he didn’t, which was a disappointment to her.
As her hand continued hanging beside him, she lowered her grin. The awkward moment caused her to retrieve her hand. Oh well. Maybe he was timid or wasn’t interested in shaking hands. Straightening herself up, she replied.
“But everyone needs friends! I think people secretly care about each other without knowing it. You just gotta lighten up you know?” Crouching down to his level, she smiled. “Plus, being lost might be kinda fun.”
“I’m already collaborating with my pokemon. If you were smart, you would do the same.”
He motioned over to a tree off to the side, closing his umbrella and putting it in his pocket. A little tired and wet, he sat down underneath the large plant. It would be best to wait for his scouting party to return…though he might have to move again if this trainer starts to be a pest.
Nobody could comprehend her mindset besides her friends. Being with Cole made her feel more comfortable despite his frigid exterior. Most of the time she had no one to talk to and this was her chance to make a friend.
Following him to the tree, she stood beside him as he sat down. Leaning over slightly, she held out a hand for a handshake. “By the way, I’m Eri! What’s your name?”
“No. I don’t know the layout of the forest, or much of Unova for that matter. Look around for a trail or something. I don’t have time to babysit.”
A small storm had only just passed over them, but how the sky looked, another one was only minutes away. Cole was prepared for it though, holding a small umbrella in his left hand, and his flask of rum in the other.
The harsh response surprised her. Forcing a smile, she asked herself if following him around was worth it. Desperate to get to the next town, she realized he was unfamiliar with the forest’s layout either.
“You’re lost too huh? Hey, how about we find the exit together? It’ll be faster if we work together!” She piped up.
“Hey mister, do you know a way out of this forest? My map got soaked in the rain and I’m kinda lost. Heh heh.”
“Did you not hear me the first time? Get lost. Beat it. Piss off. I don’t have time for your shit kid.”
Indeed he was in Unova. Though he was only there to gather intel and scout. Nothing major or anything worth noting.
This kid though…what a pain in the ass. Sticking her nose where it didn’t belong, acting so casual as if nothing wasn’t wrong with it. No manners…not even a trace of manners.
There was something about him that drew her attention. Perhaps it was his uniform because it was red, one of her favorite colors. As an extrovert, the redhead did not comprehend the concept of steeling herself from someone else’s business. She was just curious about him. The way he attempted to shoo her away was funny.
She laughed. “I know you guys do bad stuff, but I’m just curious of what you’re up to. Can’t let ya hurt somebody here. Nope. Na da.”
“I don’t even know how you reached that conclusion. Regardless, get out of my way. I don’t have time for this.”
Not even making eye contact, Cole attempted to move around the short person in front of him. Probably just another trainer trying to battle every stranger she comes across. Not even remotely worth the trouble.
“Hey! It was just a question!” Chimed Eri, jogging after him.
It had been months since she last heard about Team Magma’s criminal activities. Normally she strayed herself from them, but this one was in Unova. There had to be a reason why he was here. Once she caught up with him, she added. “I’ve heard a lot about you guys. You still planning on catching Groudon or something?”
“Heya! Aren’t you from Team Magma or somethin’?” Eri exclaimed after approaching the red-clad stranger.
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