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PROTOCOL — P.JS

♬ pairing : bodyguard!jay x idol!reader

♬ synopsis : thrown under stalker threats, you're forced to live every second under the eye of jay—a cold bodyguard you absolutely can't stand. but as his vigilance cuts through the chaotic noise of your world, the boundaries between you begin to dangerously blur.

♬ wc : 26.1k

♬ author's note : finally done with this ficcc smh. i was so unsure whether i should publish it or not, but it would've been such a waste if i didn't. so i hope you guys enjoy this fic that i nearly scrapped :/

the transition from "goddess" to human always happened in the dark.

one second, you were standing at the center of the stage, bathed in a blinding spotlight. ten thousand lightsticks pulsed in perfect synchronization to the fading beat of your final song. the screams of the crowd were a physical force, vibrating through your boots. with a practiced yet breathtaking smile, you blew a kiss to the crowd, the camera catching the reflection of the stage lights in your eyes.

"thank you! i love you, seoul!"

but the moment you stepped behind the heavy velvet curtain of the wings, the smile vanished. the stage lights were replaced by the buzzing atmosphere of the backstage corridors. the adoring screams faded into the chaotic chatter of staff, coordinators, and dancers rushing past you.

reaching your private dressing room, you let out a breath you felt like you'd been holding for hours, slamming the heavy door shut behind you to block out the noise.

you walked over to the vanity, staring at your reflection in the mirror bordered by bright bulbs. your makeup was flawless, your hair perfect, but the eyes staring back looked frayed at the edges.

"yn."

you jumped, your hand flying to your chest. in the corner of the room stood hayoon, your head manager. normally, hayoon was a whirlwind of energy, loudly organizing schedules or humming along to your tracks. right now, she was dead silent, her knuckles white as she gripped her phone.

"hayoon," you breathed, trying to laugh it off. "you scared me. what are you doing— why are you lurking in the dark?"

when she didn't answer and looked down to lock her gaze on the screen of her phone, your smile faltered. the cold drop of dread, a feeling that had become all too familiar over the last three months, pooled in the pit of your stomach. "what is it? did another post go viral? did someone make another fake rumor?"

"no," hayoon whispered. she then looked up, and the anxiety in her eyes made your breath hitch. "it's... it's not an online rumor." before she could stop you, you crossed the room and snatched the phone straight out of her hand.

"yn, wait, don't look—"

your eyes stared at the screen. it was an anonymous direct message sent to hayoon's personal business account. attached to it was a photo that made your heart stop.

the image was taken from a security camera perspective—or rather, someone hiding in a corner. it showed the interior of the elevator in your highly secure apartment building. in the photo, your own back was turned, wearing the exact hoodie you had worn yesterday morning when leaving for rehearsals.

you looked so tired yesterday. the elevator smells like your perfume. come home tonight. don't keep me waiting.

the phone slipped slightly in your trembling fingers. the security gates, the keypad locks, and the heavy glass doors of your premium complex had failed.

they knew exactly where you slept. they had been standing right behind you.

"we've already called the police, and the building security is reviewing the footage," she said frantically, grabbing your cold hands. "but yn... mr. han just called. he wants you in his office. now."

later, when the heavy, frosted-glass doors of the office slid open, the silence that greeted you was heavy. han, your ceo, had his tie loosened, jacket draped messily over a chair, and he was pacing the length of his office. on his marble desk laid scattered security reports and a tablet displaying the very photo you had just seen on hayoon's phone.

"yn," he called, stopping his pacing the moment you stepped into the room. his voice lacked its usual calmness. "sit."

you chose to remain standing. you crossed your arms tightly over your chest, trying to anchor yourself. "i'm fine," you lied, forcing your voice to remain steady. "the elevator photo... yes, it's creepy. but we can handle this thing quietly, right? we can change my keypad lock. i'll get a dual-authentication system. we can hire a private security form to patrol the lobby of my building. there's no need to make a scene or alert the press."

you desperately wanted to downplay it. in your world, a loss of control was fatal. if the media caught wind of a serious security breach, your upcoming comeback would be delayed, your sponsors would panic, and your fragile grasp on a normal life would slip away entirely.

han let out a humorless laugh, rubbing his temples. "do you think a new keypad lock is going to stop this person, yn? you think this is just a fan who got lucky?"

"they didn't just take a photo," he spoke when you tried to intrude, voice dropping into a harsh whisper. he walked over to his desk, picked up a clear evidence bag, and held it up. your breath caught in your throat. inside the plastic bag was a delicate, silver charm bracelet—one you had noticed missing from your jewelry box three days ago.

"our team found this on your doormat twenty minutes ago," he said, eyes drilling into yours. "they didn't just see you enter the elevator. they have been inside your apartment. they could have watched you sleep. they took your things, and they left this as a reminder that they can touch you whenever they want."

the room seemed to tilt. the air left your lungs, and a cold, sickening wave of nausea washed over you. the only place on earth where you could drop the idol mask had been violated.

"this is no longer a matter of image or anything," han continued, placing the bag on the desk with a heavy thud. "this is a matter of survival. i cannot, and will not, let anything happen. which is why i took matters in my own hands."

you swallowed hard, your throat dry. "what do you mean?"

"i've hired a private, full-time bodyguard for you. he is highly trained, elite, and committed. from this moment on, he will be with you twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. he goes where you go. he sleeps in your guest room. he will protect you."

anger, sharp and defensive, flared up through your fear. the thought of a stranger invading the tiny sliver of privacy you had made you feel utterly suffocated. "no," you shook your head. "no, please. a stranger living in my apartment? i'll feel like a prisoner. i can't live like that. i don't need a babysitter."

"i'm not asking for your permission, yn," he answered coldly before pressing the button to his desk intercom. "bring him in."

the heavy doors behind you clicked open, swinging inward with a slow gravity. you spun around, breath catching as a tall silhouette stepped into the room.

describe him how you wanted, but he was undeniably imposing. he wore a crisp, tailored black suit that looked like armor on his broad shoulders, hugging a powerful frame built for violence. a dark silk tie was knotted perfectly at his collar, and his hands were loosely clasped in front of him.

but it was his face that made you freeze. striking features were cast in an expression of stone, dark eyes swept the room—not with the wide-eyed awe of a fan, but with the cold precision of someone scanning for threats. his gaze passed over the furniture, paused briefly on the bag on the desk, and finally landed on you. there was no flicker of excitement. no recognition of the worldwide-famous idol standing in front of him.

"yn, this is jongseong. you can call him jay," han introduced from behind you, his voice returning to a position of authority. "former elite special forces, top of his class in private intelligence security. i paid quite a grand amount of money to break his contract with a foreign embassy to bring him here, so i hope you respect him."

jay took two steps forward, polished dress shoes echoing softly against the marble floor. he stopped exactly three steps away from you, close enough for you to feel the aura radiating off him, but far enough to respect boundaries.

he bent at the waist, executing a perfectly angled bow. "it's an honor to meet you, yn-ssi."

you stared at him, chest heaving slightly. up close, you could see a faint, jagged scar cutting just below his left jawline, disappearing into his collar. he looked lethal and, worst of all, he looked like a reminder that your freedom was gone.

"he will accompany you back to your apartment tonight," han continued, ignoring the fury radiating off your posture. "his bags are already in the car. jay, she's all yours. keep her safe."

jay straightened up, dark eyes looking back onto yours. "understood, han-nim," he replied quietly.

you clamped your jaw shut, a toxic mix of terror, violation, and burning resentment swirling in your gut. without a word, you spun on your heel and marched out of the office, desperately trying to outrun the shadow that you knew was already following right behind you.

the heels of your boots clicked sharply against the concrete of the private garage. you kept your strides long and fast, hayoon scurrying to keep up on your left, her head buried in a tablet as she quietly arranged a route back to your apartment.

but no matter how fast you walked, you could hear the heavy rhythm of another set of footsteps behind you. you didn't need to look back to know jay was there. you could practically feel the weight of his gaze, a pressure between your shoulder blades.

just as you reached the sleek black van waiting in the vip bay, you stopped dead in your tracks. hayoon nearly stumbled, blinking up at you. "yn? is everything—"

you didn't look at her. instead, you spun around and faced the man. jay stopped instantly, looking down at you with that same infuriating, unreadable expression.

"look, jay— or whatever your name is," you snapped, crossing your arms tightly. you injected every ounce of the persona you used to fend off overly aggressive executives into your voice. "i don't care how much money my ceo paid, or what kind of elite background you have. i value my privacy and my space. having a stranger breathe down my neck at all times is going to drive me insane."

from the corner of your eye, you saw hayoon go pale, silently waving her hands for you to stop, but you ignored her. you stepped closer to him, tilting your chin up to look him dead in the eye.

"i don't need a fucking babysitter," you whispered, voice trembling slightly with a mix of fury and exhaustion as tears started to swell in your eyes. "so here are the rules. you stay ten steps back at all times. you don't speak unless spoken to. and when we are in my apartment, you pretend i don't exist. got it?"

the silence that followed was suffocating. the hum of the garage's ventilation system felt incredibly loud. jay didn't flinch. he didn't get defensive, nor did he apologize. he just stared down at you, his dark eyes absorbing your outburst calmly. for a second, you wondered if he was even human.

then, he leaned forward just an inch, enough to let you know he wasn't intimidated by your stardom. "my job isn't to babysit you, yn-ssi," he said quietly. "it's to keep you alive."

before you could process his words, he stepped past you. he reached out and opened the heavy sliding door of the van, shielding the top of the frame with his large hand so you wouldn't bump your head.

he gestured inside, "please get in, yn-ssi. we are exposed out here."

your jaw tightened, a sudden lump forming in your throat. the anger was gone, replaced by a sobering reality. without a word, you climbed into the back of the dark van, feeling smaller than you ever had in your life.

the crushing weight followed you all the way home, morphing into a heavy awkwardness the moment the door of your apartment clicked shut behind the two of you.

your apartment had always been your sanctuary. it was a private world where you could shed your idol image and simply breathe without a camera tracking your every movement. but the moment jay crossed the threshold, the air in the area shifted. suddenly, that sanctuary of yours felt like a cage.

in the weeks that followed, you learned that living with a bodyguard was less like having a roommate and more like being haunted by a highly disciplined ghost. jay was a lethal presence, yet he managed to move with a terrifying lack of noise.

you quickly became aware of the changes in your environment. the most jarring was the entryway. every morning, when you stumbled out of your bedroom, your eyes would dart to the genkan. there, positioned next to your chaotic pile of sneakers, sat a single pair of polished black dress shoes.

jay occupied the guest room at the end of the hall, but he barely seemed to leave a footprint. he never touched your things, never stayed in the living room, and never cooked. yet, his presence was absolute.

you would wake up at five am for an early broadcast, creeping out into the dark hallway in your oversized sweatpants and messy hair, only to freeze. there he would be, already standing by the kitchen island. he was always dressed in a sharp black suit, tie knotted perfectly, looking as if he hadn't spent the night sleeping but rather standing on standby.

and because his quiet invasion of your apartment rattled you so deeply, you decided to fight back the only way you knew how.

by freezing him out completely.

if you had to endure him at home, you were going to make sure he got nothing from you on the job. you erected a towering wall of silence, treating him less like a human being and more like a piece of security equipment you had been forced to carry around.

over the next few weeks, your daily interactions devolved into a routine of short rejections.

when the van picked you both up in the early hours of the morning, jay would sit up straight in the front passenger seat. he would look at you reflection in the rearview mirror, deep voice slicing through the quiet cabin. "is the temperature okay, yn-ssi?"

you wouldn't even look up from your phone. "it's fine."

during a chaotic music show promotion, while the room hummed with the frantic energy of stylists, jay stood like a statue by the door. when a loud burst of laughter echoed from the hallway, he would subtly shift his weight, his eyes darting to the entrance before turning to you. "are you expecting any guests today?"

you would lazily flip the page of your magazine, voice dripping with indifference. "nope."

even at the end of a grueling, fourteen-hour day, when the back exit of a recording studio was swarming with a sudden crowd of fans, he would hold the heavy door open by a crack, assessing the perimeter. "do you want to take the lower parking level to avoid the crowd, yn-ssi?"

you would pull your cap down over your eyes, stepping right past him without a glance. "whatever."

you kept waiting for the icy routine to break him. you kept waiting for his mask to slip, for a flicker of annoyance to cross those eyes, or for him to finally snap and complain about your attitude. you wanted him to show a weakness, a shred of frustration that proved you were getting under his skin.

but it never happened.

realizing your silence couldn't break him only fueled a stubborn and childish desperation to try another tactic. if you couldn't freeze him out, you would outrun him. you needed to prove, if only to yourself, that you still owned your life. you needed to find a single crack in his perfect appearance.

thus began a stealthy game of cat and mouse across the venues of seoul.

the first real attempt happened during a wardrobe fitting for an upcoming awards show. the styling room was a claustrophobic maze of clothing racks, rolling mirrors, and frantic designers. jay, respecting your privacy, stood guard just outside the main door. spotting a narrow exit in the back, you gave your head stylist a quick smile. "i need a second to get something. don't let anyone in."

before she could question you, you slipped through the exit, slipping into a dim hallway. your heart hammered against your ribs, a thrill of pure adrenaline rushing through your veins as you turned a corner, then another, convinced you had finally bought yourself five minutes of unmonitored freedom.

you took a sharp left toward the main lobby only to freeze. there, standing quietly beside a row of vending machines at the end of the hall, was jay.

he was simply standing at ease, calmly adjusting the cuff of his sleeve. as your boots clicked to a halt, his dark eyes lifted to meet yours. he simply executed a brief nod and stepped smoothly into stride behind you.

you tried again a week later at a broadcast station during a live music special. the corridors were a nightmare, flooded with dozens of backup dancers, staff pushing heavy equipment cases, and massive idol groups rushing to and from the stage. taking advantage of a sudden wave of a twelve-member boy group passing between you and jay, you veered sharply down a corridor, blending into the sea of stage outfits.

you darted down a flight of stairs, ducking into a quiet room on the lower level. breathless, you let out a laugh, leaning your back against the closed doors.

you had done it. you had actually lost him.

turning around to look for a bottle of water, your voice caught in your throat. jay was already inside the room. he was standing by the emergency exit door on the opposite wall, hands loosely clasped in front of him. he looked up from his watch, his face a flawless mask.

"the blueprints for these older broadcast stations are confusing, yn-ssi," he said, deep voice completely level, as if he were merely discussing the weather. "but the emergency stairwells all lead to this corridor. please let me know if you require a change of scenery next time, so i can sweep the room beforehand."

you realized with a sinking dread that you weren't dealing with some babysitter. it hung heavily in the air, enduring through the grueling weeks of promotional schedules and bleeding right into the suffocating confinement of a thirteen-hour flight.

you sat in the plush business class cabin, staring blankly out the window at the blanket of clouds. you had your armor on—the black hat pulled low, a white medical mask covering half your face, and dark glasses hiding your bloodshot eyes. it was the standard idol uniform for survival.

across the aisle, jay sat in perfect posture. while you had spent the flight tossing and turning, he had remained alert, eyes fixed on the flight tracker screen or subtly scanning the cabin whenever a flight attendant walked past. you were still determined to ignore him, keeping your face turned toward the window.

hayoon hurried up from the economy class section the moment the seatbelt sign clicked off after landing, her face tight with worry as she bent down to whisper in your ear.

"yn, i just got a text from the ground team," she said, voice trembling slightly. "your flight information was leaked a few hours ago. the arrival lobby is... it's bad. there are hundreds of fans and fansites already blocking the gates. the airport police are trying to deploy extra security, but it's completely gridlocked."

a familiar spike of anxiety pierced through your chest. you closed your eyes, taking a slow breath. just another arrival, you lied to yourself. just walk fast and keep your head down.

you stood up, adjusting your hat. as you stepped into the aisle, jay moved instantly, his massive frame shifting to block the path ahead of you, creating a small pocket of space. he didn't look at you, keeping his eyes trained on the exit doors of the aircraft.

"always stay right behind me, yn-ssi," he commanded quietly. "do not stop walking for any reason. no matter what happens, keep moving."

the walk through the terminal felt like marching into a pressure cooker. even from a distance, the echo of chanting and cheering bounced off the ceilings, growing louder and more overwhelming with every step you took.

the moment the automatic doors of the arrival lobby slid open, the volume of the crowd hit you.

it wasn't a violent riot, but the density of the crowd was staggering. a sea of fans, casual onlookers, and paparazzi stood packed behind the ropes, a wall of phones and cameras instantly raising into the air. the blinding white strobe lights of flashlights exploded across your vision, turning the path ahead into a dizzying blur.

"yn! look over here!" "just one glance, please, yn!"

you ducked your head, keeping your eyes locked on the floor, trying to match jay's steady pace. flanked by hayoon and your other manager, you tried to maintain the facade, but the space was rapidly shrinking.

and suddenly, the crowd spilled into you.

a wave of bodies closed the gap, and the momentum instantly separated you from your team. hayoon was cut off, pinned behind a group of fans trying to hand you gifts, while your other manager was pushed several steps ahead, desperately trying to clear a path that was closing up just as fast.

within seconds, you were completely trapped, your breath catching as the lights and voices began to blur into an inescapable drone.

before the panic could fully drag you under, the flashing lights vanished. a massive frame violently cut through the sea of bodies, blocking out the glare of the cameras. the sudden scent of cedar and rain enveloped your senses as jay stepped directly into the eye of the storm.

he didn't hesitate. he didn't ask for permission.

with unyielding authority, he wrapped a protective arm around your shoulders. his hand, large and remarkably warm, gently but firmly pressed against the back of your head, tucking your face securely against his chest. he used his entire upper body to create a physical canopy over you, shielding you from the intrusive lenses and reaching hands.

"step back. move away, please," jay's voice boomed. it wasn't a shout, but the force of his tone made the fans nearest to you instinctively shrink back.

he became an immovable barrier. you could feel his frame take the rough jostling of the crowd as he began to move. his muscles braced against the weight of people pushing forward, yet his steps never faltered.

pressed against him, your ears were filled with the steady thud of his heartbeat. you clutched the fabric of his suit jacket with white knuckles, letting him bear your weight as he carried you through the press of the crowd.

jay didn't slacken his grip for a second, moving you with him until the door of the van appeared in your blurred vision. he guided you inside, his large hand protecting your head from the frame, and dove in right behind you.

the sound of the door sealing shut brought an immediate silence. the tinted windows instantly cut off the flashing lights, reducing the swarming mob outside to muffled noise as the driver slammed on the gas and the van surged into the open street.

you were finally safe.

but your body hadn't received the memo. you sat curled up in the corner of the plush leather seat, your chest heaving as you tried to draw in enough air. you wrapped your arms tightly around your torso, trying to force your body to stop shaking, staring blindly at the floor mat as tears pricked the corners of your eyes.

a soft rustle broke the quiet of the car. a heavy yet warm weight settled over your trembling shoulders. you blinked, realizing jay had shed his suit jacket and draped it over you.

a moment later, a cool bottle of water appeared in your line of sight. "drink," he ordered.

you raised your head slowly. he was kneeling slightly on the floor of a moving van to bring himself down to your eye level. his eyes, usually so cold, were searching your face with a quiet intensity. his hands were steady as he loosened the cap of the bottle for you, but you noticed the slight tension in his jaw.

you reached out, hand shaking so badly your fingers brushed against his warm knuckles as you took the water.

he leaned in just a fraction closer. "i've got you. you're safe now, alright?"

you stared at him, the bottle pressed against your palms. looking into his eyes, you felt a sudden, strange warmth bloom beneath the terror. the icy wall you had built so carefully around your heart started to shatter.

the fracture only widened during the silent ride back to the complex, and it dismantled your thoughts once you were finally behind closed doors.

the entire evening passed in a blur. as you stood under the streaming water of your shower, washing away the dirty feeling, your mind refused to reset. every time you closed your eyes, you didn't see the flashing cameras or the surging crowd.

you felt the weight of his arm around your shoulders. you heard the deep cadence of his heartbeat against your ears.

even later, as you padded around the kitchen in your softest oversized pajamas, the apartment felt entirely different. you found yourself glancing toward the hallway leading to the guest room. for weeks, his presence had felt like a suffocating invasion. but tonight, it felt like an anchor.

by midnight, the apartment was completely dark, illuminated only by the faint glow of the seoul skyline filtering through the floor-to-ceiling windows. the silence was deafening, and the leftover adrenaline kept sleep out of reach. you needed to do it. you needed to clear the air.

taking a slow breath, you stepped out of your bedroom and walked down the long hallway.

stopping right outside the guest room door, your hand curled into the fabric of your sleeves. suddenly a wave of intense nervousness washed over you. what am i even doing? you through, your mind spiraling into a mess. it's midnight. he's off the clock. am i being weird? he was just doing his job. he's paid to do this.

you raised your hand, your knuckle hovering a mere inch away from the dark wood, debating whether to just turn around and sprint back to your room.

before you could make a choice, the door suddenly clicked and swung open. you gasped softly, taking a step back.

jay stood in the doorway. and for the first time since you had met him, the armored monument was gone. he wasn't wearing the sharp black suit or the tie. instead, he was in a simple, loose-fitting black t-shirt and dark gray sweatpants. his dark hair, normally seen styled back, fell softly over his forehead, brushing against his eyebrows. the casual look softened the sharp angles of his face, making him look dangerously human.

he froze for a fraction of a second, his dark eyes widening slightly as they swept over your pajama-clad frame, before his professional mask quickly slipped back into place.

"yn-ssi," he said, his deep voice carrying a raspy edge from the late hour. he instantly stepped to the side, adjusting his posture out of habit. "is everything alright? did security report a breach?"

"no," you denied quickly. "no, nothing's wrong. i'm fine."

jay blinked, his gaze softening just a fraction as he looked down at you. "then... do you need anything? i can get you some water or check around the building if you're having trouble sleeping."

"i don't need you to check on anything, jay," you breathed, a genuine smile finally breaking through your nerves. you took a half-step closer, looking up into his eyes. "i just... i came to say thank you for today. at the airport."

he went entirely still, chest rising and falling with a slow breath. he bowed his head slightly, the movement formal despite the casual clothing he had on. "there's no need to thank me, yn-ssi. i was simply executing my duty. keeping you out of harm's way is my job."

hearing that rigid response made something twist in your chest. "stop doing that," you murmured, tilting your head.

he paused, brows furrowing slightly. "doing what, yn-ssi?"

"that," you pointed out, gesturing vaguely to him. "calling me 'yn-ssi' and the whole stiff bodyguard thing. we live together, jay. you just dragged me out of a crazy crowd today. i think we're past honorifics."

he shifted his weight. "well, your ceo's protocols dictated that i maintain a professional boundary—"

"i don't care about his protocols," you interrupted gently. "when it's just us, call me yn."

the hallway fell into a thick silence. jay stared down at you, jaw tightening slightly as if he were physically fighting against years of training. the casual drape of his t-shirt shifted as he let his arms drop to his sides, the distance between you feeling small in the dark. he swallowed, vocal cords clicking in the quiet. "alright," he mumbled, the mask slipping just enough for you to see the warmth hidden underneath. "yn."

the way your name rolled off his tongue sent a fluttering warmth straight to your chest. it sounded completely different without the corporate weight attached to it—softer, heavier, and too intimate.

"and... one more thing," you added, voice dropping into a quiet murmur. you looked down at your hands, fingers relentlessly tugging at the edge of your sleeve. the stubborn pride that had sustained you for weeks was gone, leaving you exposed. "i'm sorry."

jay didn't answer. he waited, his attention anchored on you.

"for these past few weeks," you confessed, forcing yourself to look back up and meet his eyes. "i was awful to you. when i called you off on your first day, the cold answers, trying to get away from you... i was treating you like the enemy when you were just trying to do your job. it was really childish. i'm sorry."

for a second, you thought you saw the faintest trace of a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. it was a look so devastatingly handsome on his usually stone-faced expression that it caught you off guard. "you don't need to apologize," he said softly. he leaned his shoulder lightly against the doorframe, a gesture so casual it made your heart skip a beat. "i knew what i was signing up for. and for what it's worth... your escape attempts weren't entirely terrible. you actually almost had me at the broadcast station."

a laugh escaped your lips, the last remnants of the day's tension finally disappearing. "almost?"

"almost," he repeated, his dark eyes crinkling slightly at the corners. then, his expression grew serious again, the gaze holding yours. "i know this is a lot. having your life upended, having me in your space. i don't expect you to like it... or like me. but you never have to apologize for being stressed, yn."

hearing him use your name again, so naturally this time, made your chest flutter in the best way possible.

you nodded, taking a reluctant step back down the hallway. "goodnight, jay," you whispered.

"goodnight," he replied, his deep voice wrapping around you like a blanket. he stayed standing in the doorway, watching over you with that same protective aura, but the cold look was gone.

as you turned and walked back to your bedroom, the apartment didn't feel like a cage anymore. and as you finally climbed into bed, pulling the sheets up to your chin, you realized you weren't afraid of the intrusion anymore.

when your alarm blared at six am, the lingering peace from the night before was instantly put to the test.

your mind instinctively braced for the uncomfortable dance of avoiding the stranger living in your guest room. but as you padded down the hallway while rubbing your eyes, the tight knot in you stomach didn't tighten. if anything, it loosened.

the kitchen was bathed in the soft glow of the morning sun filtering through the windows.

jay was already there, standing by the island. he was back in his work uniform, looking as neat as ever. but the tension that usually radiated off him was noticeably absent. his shoulders were relaxed, and his posture, while still authoritative, lacked the edge of the previous weeks. as your slippers scuffed against the hardwood floor, he turned his head. "good morning, yn."

the name left his lips smoothly, without a trace of hesitation, as if he had been practicing it. "morning, jay," you murmured, stepping fully into the kitchen.

usually, this was the exact moment you would snatch a glass of water, keep your head down, and go straight back to your bedroom until it was time to leave for the car. instead, you walked right up to the kitchen island and pulled out one of the barstools, sitting down with a small sigh.

jay paused, eyes tracking your movement with subtle surprise. "did you manage to sleep?" he asked, pushing a mug across the surface toward you. an aromatic steam of chamomile and honey rose to your nostrils.

"a little," you admitted. wrapping your hands around the warm glass. "better than usual, actually." you took a slow sip, looking at him over the rim. "you?"

"i don't need much sleep," he replied. "used to it by now."

"right. super bodyguard powers," you teased lightly, testing the waters. a twitch tugged at the corner of his lips. it wasn't a full smile, but it was enough to soften his sharp features. "something like that."

you took another sip of the tea, leaning your forearms on the marble counter. "honestly, jay... how do you do it? you spent weeks standing around like a statue, never touching my food, never even using the couch. do you just turn off like a robot when i go to sleep?"

he let out a low breath. it was a sound so close to a chuckle it made your heart do a backflip. "old military habits," he responded simply with a small shrug. "back then, staying on guard was normal. when i took this job, they told me to stay out of your way and do my work quietly. so... i tried to stay out of your hair."

"well, you kind of failed," you rested your chin and looked at him with a smirk. "you were way too scary to ignore. i honestly thought you were some secret agent sent to judge my messy life."

jay glanced down at the counter where your abandoned mug, an old snack wrapper, and stray lyric pages that laid scattered, then back up at you. "i did notice the lyric sheets on the floor," he said dryly. "nobody warned me i'd be protecting someone this messy."

your jaw dropped dramatically. "hey! that's my creative process. bodyguards aren't allowed to judge that."

"i'm not judging, yn," he argued. "i'm just observing."

a comfortable silence settled over the kitchen, the weight now light unlike how it used to be. "anyway... hayoon's picking us up at seven," you brought up. "recordings all day, then a late studio rehearsal."

"i know," he nodded once. "i already checked the traffic, and i talked to the venue manager to make sure we used the back entrance."

you looked at him—really looked—taking in the sharp cut of his suit, the quiet confidence in his eyes, and the effortless way he kept everything running smoothly just to keep you safe. "thanks, jay."

he gave a gentle nod, "anytime."

over the next few days, the quiet truce bled into every corner of your routine, completely changing the air between you whenever you stepped out into public.

by thursday, you were backstage at a major network studio for yet another music show recording.

the prep room was a noisy and cramped disaster. stylists were frantically steaming out outfit options, makeup artists were surrounding you with brushes and hairspray, and your managers were yelling over the noise to coordinate.

in the past, jay would have stood right outside the door or leaned against the far wall in silence. but today, he was inside the room, standing only a few feet from your vanity. his posture was still straight and alert, but he seemed more at ease. when hayoon squeezed past him holding three massive garment bags, jay reached out to take two of them off her hands, hanging them up for her without being asked.

"okay, tilt your head up for lip gloss," your makeup artist instructed, dabbing a soft tint across your lips.

you tilted your chin up, eyes catching jay's reflection in the mirror. he was scanning the room, but the second he noticed you watching him through the glass, his eyes met yours. you offered him a small smile, which he returned with a nod.

"hey, jay," you called out later on over the sound of a hair dryer, turning around in the revolving chair once the artist stepped back. jay shifted his focus entirely to you, taking a small step closer. "yes, yn?"

"hayoon brought way too much food today," you pointed toward the overflowing table near the couch. there were boxes of food, fresh fruit, and iced drinks meant for your team. "grab a sandwich or something. you've been standing there for three hours."

hayoon froze in the middle of checking her ipad, blinking in utter shock as her eyes darted between you and jay. even the stylists in the room went silent. everyone knew how fiercely you had tried to ignore jay for the past weeks, so seeing you casually offer him food was like watching a completely different person.

"i'm on duty, yn," he said softly. "i don't need to eat while watching over the area."

"it's just a sandwich, jay, not a security breach," you teased, leaning back in your chair with a soft laugh. "and the only area you're watching right now is full of clothing and makeup."

hayoon cleared her throat, looking like she had just witnessed a miracle. "uh... yeah, jay, seriously. help yourself. she never shares her sandwiches, so take it before she changes her mind."

a faint smile appeared on his face. he walked over to the table, grabbed a sandwich, and held it up slightly toward you in a toast. "thanks," he said. you smiled back, turning back to the mirror as the hairstylist resumed her work.

by the time the weekend rolled around, you had grown more used to jay. it was four-thirty am on saturday, and the world outside was still pitch black. your schedule for the day was brutal. you had a pre-recording followed by a fan sign event on the other side of the city.

you stumbled out of the apartment lobby, half-asleep, wrapped in a hoodie that felt way too heavy for your exhausted frame. your eyes were burning, your brain felt like a mush, and the thought of putting on a bright persona in less than two hours made you want to crawl straight back into bed.

jay opened the van door for you, holding a hand over the top frame to make sure you didn't bump your head in your zombie-like state.

"morning," you mumbled, climbing into the leather interior and slumping into your usual seat. "morning," he replied, sliding in after you and closing the door.

you closed your eyes, resting your forehead against the cool glass window, waiting for the dreaded morning nausea and caffeine headache to kick in.

"here," a deep voice muttered beside you.

you opened your eyes. jay was reaching toward the cup holder in front of you, placing a tumbler right in your line of sight. you blinked, looking at the cup, then up at jay's face. "what's this?"

"iced vanilla latte," he answered. "with oat milk."

you sat up a little straighter, taking the tumbler into your hands. it felt cool against your palms, but the warmth of the gesture hit you. you took a sip, and your eyes widened slightly. it wasn't too sweet, and you could taste the exact oat milk brand that never messed up your stomach.

"wait..." you glanced at jay, bewildered. "where did you get this? it's four in the morning."

"there's a twenty-four hour place two blocks over" he rested his hands in his lap. "i walked over while you were getting dressed."

"jay, you walked two blocks in the dark just to buy me coffee?" you asked, a laugh escaping your lips. "you know hayoon just grabs whatever's at the studio, right?"

"i know that," jay said. "and last time, you took one sip of it, realized it was regular milk, and set it down for the rest of the day."

you froze, the cup held halfway to your mouth. "you... noticed that?"

"it's my job to notice," he shrugged. but the way his eyes held yours in the dim light of the van said something entirely different.

from the front seat, hayoon turned around, looking back at the two of you with surprised eyes. "wait, jay... she didn't even tell me she stopped drinking regular milk. how did you figure that out?"

"i just paid attention."

a flustered heat bloomed in your cheeks. you took another long sip of the latte just to give your hands something to do, trying to hide the small smile threatening to break across your face. "you really don't miss anything, do you?" you leaned your head back against the seat, feeling a hundred times more awake than you had only minutes ago.

"not when it comes to you," jay replied. the statement was delivered with his usual calm tone, but in the closed space of the moving van, it felt heavy and somewhat intimate.

"well..." you started, tapping on the tumbler with your fingertips. "for the record, it's perfect. thank you, jay."

he glanced over at you, a warm look washing over his face. " it's my pleasure."

the unspoken ease from that day carried you through the rest of the week, but slow progress didn't mean the boundaries had vanished.

it was late thursday evening, and you were stuck in a dance studio at the agency headquarters, running through the choreography for your upcoming comeback for the last three hours. sweat was dripping down your neck, your limbs felt like lead, and your throat was dry.

jay stood in his usual position by the door, framed by the mirrors. he had been standing there silently, his sharp eyes tracking every move, every jump, every stumble.

"alright, let me see it from the chorus again!" your choreographer shouted from the front of the room, clapping his hands sharply. "yn, your feet were kind of off. pick up the pace."

you wiped your damp forehead with the back of your hand, taking a heavy breath. "got it. one more time."

"actually," the choreographer corrected smoothly, looking at his watch, "let's do three more times. we need this clean before tomorrow's camera test."

you swallowed down the lump in your throat, nodding reluctantly. your knees were aching, but this was the job. you fell back into your starting position, waiting for the track to play. suddenly, a commanding voice cut through the speakers.

"she needs a break."

the music cut out instantly. the choreographer blinked, startled, turning around to look at the corner of the room. jay had stepped away from the door, taking a slow pace into the center of the floor. his expression was unreadable, but his shoulders were squared.

"excuse me?" the choreographer asked, a subtle edge entering his voice. "we're in the middle of a session."

"she's been practicing for hours without water," jay pointed out, completely unfazed by the annoyance. he didn't look at the choreographer. his eyes were fixed on you, noting the tremor in your knees. "her form is slipping because of physical exhaustion. pushing further right now increases the risk of an injury. take fifteen minutes."

the room fell into an uncomfortable silence. bodyguards were hired to protect idols from crowds and stalkers. they should never interfere with agency staff, and they certainly didn't dictate schedules.

"jay..." you murmured softly, cheeks burning as every pair of eyes in the room darted between you and him.

the choreographer frowned, opening his mouth to pull rank, but the composure radiating off jay made him pause. jay didn't yell pr raise his voice, but the menace in his posture made it clear he wasn't asking for permission. "fifteen minutes," the choreographer finally muttered, waving a dismissive hand as he picked up his tablet. "everyone take fifteen."

as everyone dispersed to do their own things, jay walked directly over to where you were standing. he reached down, picked up your towel and a fresh water bottle from the cooler, and handed them to you. "drink," he commanded quietly.

you took the water, but instead of opening it, you looked up at him with your brows pulled together. the room was almost empty now, but the air felt heavy with tension.

"jay... you can't do that," you whispered, keeping your voice low so the remaining staff couldn't overhear.

jay paused. "you were about to collapse, yn."

"i know my limits, jay," you said gently, though there was a clear line in your tone. "i appreciate that you're looking out for me. i really do. but that's my choreographer. when you step in like that, it makes me look unprofessional, and it puts you in a bad spot with my management."

jay stared down at you. for a second, his expression revealed a flash of protective frustration. he tightened his jaw, taking a slow breath. "i understand," he looked at the floor. "i overstepped. i apologize."

"you don't have to apologize," you murmured, softening as you noticed the faint tension in his hands. you cracked open the water bottle and took a long sip, giving him a reassuring look. "just remember... we're still at work."

jay give a single nod, stepping back. "understood."

the rest of the rehearsal passed in a blur. jay had remained by the door like an absolute statue, eyes fixed on the room, but he didn't interrupt again. true to your word, you pushed through the remaining routines, though every muscle in your body was screaming for help by the time your choreographer finally called it a night at eleven pm.

around thirty minutes later, the agency building was practically abandoned.

you were sitting on the cold floor of the dance studio, leaning your back against the mirror. your sneakers were kicked off, your hair was tied into a messy ponytail, and you were far too exhausted to move.

a quiet scuff of dress shoes broke the silence as jay walked back into the studio, carrying a small paper bag. he stopped a few feet away from where you were sitting, looking down at you with that familiar gaze. "the van is waiting downstairs whenever you're ready," he added, deep voice carrying a quiet softness that echoed. "no rush."

"give me a few minutes," you groaned softly, tilting your head back against the mirror and closing your eyes. "my legs feel like jelly."

instead of standing guard by the entrance like he usually did, he did something that caught you completely off guard. he unbuttoned his suit jacket, set the paper bag on the floor, and folded his massive frame down, sitting on the floor a few feet away from you.

you opened your eyes, blinking in surprise as you looked over at him. seeing a man in a crisp suit sitting cross-legged on a dance studio floor at midnight was an endearingly absurd sight. "what's in the bag?" you asked, nodding toward the brown paper.

jay reached in and pulled out a bottled honey tea and a small container of sliced fruit. he set them down on the floor between the two of you, right within your reach. "sugar and hydration," he answered simply. "since you didn't eat dinner."

you stared at the bottle, then gazed at his dark eyes. "jay," you mumbled, taking the food he had given. "about earlier... during practice."

"you were right," he interrupted quietly, his voice dropping into a rumbling hum. "i let my personal judgment interfere with your work. it won't happen again."

hearing him say personal judgment made your chest flutter.

"i wasn't mad that you cared," you said softly, looking down at the bottle in your hands before meeting his gaze again. "i was just trying to protect you. my management... they're strict. if they think you're overstepping, they'll surely replace you. and i—" you paused, the words catching in your throat as you realized how much you had come to rely on him. "i don't want another bodyguard, jay."

jay went completely still. his chest rose and fell with deep breaths. "they won't replace me," he shook his head, voice carrying a conviction that made you blink. "i'm not going anywhere."

you looked at him for a long moment, taking in the steady, unshakeable sincerity in his eyes. there was still a boundary between you—you were still the idol, and he was still the man hired to stand in front of danger for you. but sitting on the floor of a dance studio at nearly midnight, that line felt thinner than ever. "good," you whispered, a tiny smile playing on your lips as you cracked open the bottle of tea. "because i don't think anyone else knows how to make my coffee order."

a faint curve softened jay's lips, eyes crinkling just a little at the corners. "then i'll make sure i keep the job."

the silence settled back over the studio, but it wasn't heavy anymore. it felt somewhat easy. you looked over at him still sitting a few feet away, keeping that professional cushion of space between you. "you know," you murmured, shifting and pulling your knees up to your chest, "you're sitting way over there like i'm going to bite."

jay blinked, a faint flicker of surprise passing over his features. "i'm giving you space."

"well, don't," you shrugged, then patted the floor next to you. he hesitated for a moment, eyes searching your face to see if you were serious. but finding no hesitation in your expression, he let out a low breath. he slid closer until he was sitting right beside you against the mirror. the warmth radiating off him was immediate, filling the space beside you. you could smell the subtle, comforting scent of his perfume.

"better," you murmured, leaning your head back. "so, since we're stuck here until my legs start working again, tell me something about you. real stuff. not the bodyguard stuff."

jay looked straight ahead, thinking. "there's not much to tell. my life before private security wasn't very interesting."

"i frankly don't believe that," you countered, nudging his arm lightly with your shoulder. "you spent years in the military. you look like you were born holding a weapon. but what did you actually want to be when you were a kid? don't tell me you wanted to be a suit-wearing wall."

a tiny huff of a laughter escaped jay's chest, the rare sound making your stomach do a soft flip. "a mechanic," he replied quietly. "my grandfather had an old garage outside the city. when i was ten, i spent the entire summer trying to rebuild an old motor. took me three months, covered in oil every day."

you turned your head to look at his side profile, fascinated. "a mechanic? really? why didn't you stick with it?"

"life happened," he responded, though there was no bitterness in his tone, just a calm acceptance. "the military paid for my training, and after i got out... security was where my skills fit best." he turned his head to meet your gaze. "it turns out i'm good at keeping things safe."

"you are," you agreed, voice barely over a whisper. "too good, sometimes."

jay stared down at you, gaze lingering in your eyes, then tracing the curve of your tired face. "what about you?" he asked quietly, turning the question back to you. "before the stages, the hair, the makeup... who were you?"

"just a kid who liked singing in her bedroom," you smiled faintly, looking up at the high ceiling. "i thought being an idol meant just singing and dancing all day. nobody tells you about the flashing cameras, the lack of sleep, and especially not the feeling like— like you belong to everyone except yourself."

you stopped, suddenly realizing how heavy you words sounded. you bit your lip, feeling a little embarrassed for opening up so suddenly. "sorry. that was dramatic."

"no," jay denied immediately. his tone was gentle and so fiercely grounded, it cut right through your sudden insecurity. he shifted slightly, his large hand resting on the floor just an inch away from yours. "it's not dramatic. you work harder than anyone i've ever seen, yn. you're allowed to be tired."

hearing him say that—validating the quiet struggle you hid from your fans, your managers, and the entire world—made a strange warmth blossom in your chest. "thanks, jay," you murmured, tilting you head up to look at him.

his eyes held yours in the bright lights of the empty studio, the unspoken connection between you stretching thick and sweet.

it took another twenty minutes just to gather the energy to stand up. and by the time you arrived back to the apartment and the elevator dinged on your floor, your body had officially given up. the exhaustion hit you all at once.

you managed to stumble through the front door, barely registering the warmth of the room. but instead of making it down the hallway to your bedroom, your knees gave out at the living room. you dragged yourself over to the large sofa and collapsed onto it, burying your face directly into the pillows.

"yn," a voice called out. you let out a muffled groan into the cushion, completely immobilized by fatigue. "can't move. leave me here to die. tell hayoon i tried."

a low sigh echoed in the quiet living room, followed by the heavy steps of dress shoes against the floor. jay stood over the sofa for a moment, taking in the sight of you buried under your oversized coat, clinging to a pillow like a lifeline.

he crouched down beside the sofa, bringing himself eye-level with you. "you can't sleep like this," he said. "your coat is dirty, and you'll ruin your back with that position."

"too tired," you mumbled, rolling in your position as your eyes remained stubbornly closed. "too heavy."

"i'll help," he whispered. without waiting for an answer, jay reached out. his warm hands worked with gentle care as he unzipped your heavy coat, peeling the thick material off your shoulders. you let out a quiet sigh of relief as the heavy weight lifted away, unburdening you.

then, jay shifted down toward your feet. he rested your foot lightly on his knee, his fingers working to untie the knot on your boots. he pulled them off one by one, setting them neatly beside the coffee table. through the thin material of your socks, the touch of his hands were warm, lingering just a second longer than necessary as he carefully rested your feet back onto the edge of the sofa.

he stood back up to his full height, looking down at you as you buried your cheek deeper into the sofa cushion. "can you walk back to your room?" he murmured.

"no," you whimpered, barely coherent, your arm flopping uselessly over your face. "my legs are broken. sofa is my new home."

"it's twenty steps away, yn," he said, amused. "twenty steps too many. if i stand up right now, i'm going to melt into the floor like a puddle. just leave me here. i'm one with the cushions," you argued faintly into the pillow.

a chuckle escaped jay's chest. "alright," he whispered. "have it your way."

before your sluggish brain could process what he meant, jay leaned down over you. one of his large, warm hands slid effortlessly beneath your knees, while the other braced firmly against your back. with zero effort, he lifted you completely off the sofa and up into his arms.

your eyes snapped wide open in shock, a soft gasp catching in your throat as your heart suddenly hammered against your ribs.

the shift in gravity was seamless. up close, his strength was staggering. you weren't small, but to jay, you were weightless. you instinctively wrapped your arms around his neck to steady yourself, your breath hitching as your chest pressed against his.

he was solid and warm, smelling intoxicatingly like expensive perfume. you could feel the steady beat of his heart right beneath your cheek. up close, you took in the fine details you were usually too shy to notice—the faint shadow of a stubble along his jawline, the breadth of his chest beneath his suit, and the focused intensity in his eyes as he held you like you were fragile.

"jay," you breathed out, voice a tiny murmur right next to his hair. "i've got you. keep holding on to me," he whispered back smoothly. his voice was a low rumble in his chest that vibrated straight into yours, sending a shiver down your spine.

he didn't strain, his breathing didn't even change pace, and his step didn't falter once as he carried you down the hallway.

"you're ridiculously strong," you admitted softly, your face sinking slightly deeper into the crook of his neck, unable to resist the sudden craving to be closer to his warmth. "is this part of the job description too?"

"carrying exhausted idols?" he questioned, eyes flickering down to meet yours. "only when they refuse to walk twenty steps."

"i was genuinely incapacitated," you protested weakly, though a helpless smile curved your lips. "you're just showing off now."

"maybe a little."

when he reached your bedroom, he pushed the door open with his shoulder and stepped in. he walked over to your bed, slowly bending down to set you onto the soft mattress. he didn't drop you or rush to pull away. he lowered you down with agonizing care, holding you close until your head hit the pillow.

as he began to pull his arms back, your fingers lingered against his shoulders, reluctant to let go. jay went still above you, hands resting on either side of your head on the mattress, trapping you in his breathtaking orbit.

in the dim moonlight pouring through your bedroom window, his eyes searched yours, blown wide and dark. the space between your faces was impossibly small, so close you could feel the warm brush of his breath against your lips.

"thank you, jay," you muttered, heart pounding loudly in the quiet room. "for carrying me."

jay stared down at you, gaze dropping to your lips for a split second before rising back to meet your eyes. "i'll always carry you if you need me to, yn."

slowly, jay reached down, pulled the heavy blanket up over your shoulders, and gently tucked you in. his knuckles brushed lightly against your cheek as he pulled his hand back, the fleeting physical contact lingering like a spark against your skin.

"go to sleep," he whispered softly.

"goodnight, jay."

the long flight to paris was quiet, the main cabin lights dimmed to a soft blue as the plane coasted thirty-five thousand feet above the ground.

the label had spared one expense, booking a cluster of business class seats for your team. hayoon and your main stylist were already fast asleep a few rows ahead, completely passed out from the relentless pre-departure prep.

that left you and jay sitting side-by side in the middle paired seats.

the small privacy divider between your seats had been drawn back, creating a tiny bubble in the darkened cabin. the low hum of the jet engines drowned out the rest of the world, making every breath feel magnified.

you pulled your knees up to your chest, swaddled in an oversized cream cardigan, staring blankly at the flight map glowing on your screen.

8 hours remaining.

a tight knot of anxiety fluttered in your stomach. the fashion gala wasn't just another schedule. the luxury brand you represented expected absolute perfection, and the international press was notoriously ruthless.

"you're overthinking."

you turned your head. jay had leaned back in his seat, his suit jacket off and folded neatly beside him. in just his crisp white shirt with the top button undone and sleeves rolled up to his forearm, he looked less like a bodyguard and more like a dangerously attractive traveling companion.

"is it that obvious?" you asked, resting your chin on your knees as you looked over at him.

"you've been tapping your thumb against your knee for twenty minutes," he replied. his eyes were fixed on you, attentive despite the late hour. "and you haven't touched your water."

you let out a soft breath, looking down at the condensation forming on the glass in your cup holder. "it's just... paris is a lot, jay. the fittings tomorrow, the front-row press, the paparazzi at the airport... the label made it very clear that one minor slip will be fatal."

jay shifted in his seat, turning his body slightly toward yours in the narrow space. "let the label worry about the press," he said. "my only job in paris is keeping you safe and grounded. everything else is just noise."

"what if the noise gets too loud?" you whispered. "what if i mess up, or choke during the interviews?"

"you won't," he reassured with zero hesitation, voice filled with so much certainty it made your chest ache. "i've seen you work, yn. you're brilliant at what you do. but if it gets overwhelming, you don't look at the cameras, and you don't look at the crowd."

"then, what do i look at?"

jay leaned in closer, eyes holding your captive. "you look at me. no matter how loud it gets, i'll be standing right where you can see me. i won't let anyone crowd you, and i won't let you fall."

a sudden, sharp jolt of turbulence shook the heavy aircraft, causing the plane to dip slightly. you let out a startled gasp, your hand instinctively reaching across the small gap between your seats. without thinking, your fingers clamped onto jay's forearm.

his flexed muscle beneath your grip went rigid, solid as marble. before you could pull back and apologize, jay turned his arm, his large warm palm opening to meet yours. his long fingers wrapped securely around your hand, giving it a steadying squeeze. "it's just the air current," he comforted you softly, thumb tracing a comforting arc over the back of your hand. "it's okay."

the plane smoothed out almost immediately, but neither of you moved.

your heart began to rapidly beat against your chest—not from the turbulence, but from the electric heat radiating off his palm. the touch was different from when he had carried you to your room last week. back then, you had been to exhausted to process it. now, wide awake in the quiet of the plane, every nerve ending in your hand was aware of his skin against yours.

you looked down at your hands laced together, then slowly looked back up at his face. jay was staring down at your joined hands. a faint flush was creeping up the side of his neck, disappearing beneath the open collar of his shirt. his chest rose and fell with a slightly heavier breath, his usual unflappable composure visibly cracking under the physical contact.

he swallowed hard, eyes flickering up to meet yours, filled with a vulnerability that made your breath catch in your throat.

"your hand's really warm," you murmured, throat suddenly feeling dry.

he cleared his throat, thumb pausing its gentle movement against your knuckles, though his grip didn't loosen. "is... is it too much?" he asked quietly, voice carrying an edge of nervousness. "i can pull back if—"

"no," you interrupted quickly, fingers tightening around his. a shy smile tugged at your lips as you saw the unshakeable bodyguard looking genuinely flustered over holding your hand. "don't. it... helps, actually. keep holding it."

jay stared at you for a long second, taking in your soft smile, before the tension in his shoulders finally melted away. a quiet breath of relief escaped his lips. "okay," he nodded. "i won't let go."

you leaned your head back against the plush seat cushion, your fingers intertwined with his.

that quiet warmth lasted until the wheels of the plane hit the tarmac of the airport.

the moment the plane docked at the gate, the bubble popped. jay gently released your hand, stepping back into his professional skin so fast it was almost dizzying. he buttoned his suit jacket and adjusted his posture. the flustered man from the darkened cabin was gone, replaced once again by the unyielding man.

"stay close to me," he instructed quietly as you gathered your things. when you exited the aircraft and headed toward the terminal exit, your heart pounded. "the local security reported a larger crowd than anticipated."

hayoon walked up beside you, clutching her tablet with a panicked look. "yn, the french team says there are at least three hundred fans and fifty photographers waiting at the exit. the agency wants you to do a quick wave, but don't stop."

"got it," you breathed out, trying to steady the sudden flutter in your chest.

the sliding doors of the exit opened, and the quiet airport atmosphere instantly vanished, obliterated by a deafening wall of sound.

"yn! yn! over here!"

flashes exploded like blinding white lightning, dozens going off simultaneously. the roar of shouting fans, screaming press, and heavy shutter clicks echoed off the marble floors. high-powered camera lenses thrust over the metal barricades, barely three feet from your face.

you put on your practiced, dazzling smile, raising a hand to wave as you moved forward, but the crowd pushed against the barricades. the local french security guards struggled to hold the line as aggressive paparazzi began surging past the barriers, backing up to snap close-ups.

suddenly, a push from the side sent the crowd surging forward. a heavy camera lens almost clipped your shoulder.

before you could flinch, a figure stepped into the gap effortlessly. in one swift, fluid motion, jay extended his broad arm, wrapping it securely around your shoulders and tucking your head right against his chest. he turned his body, using his shoulders and back as a human shield to block the blinding flashes and invading cameras.

"back up! step back, please!" his voice bellowed out, an impressive english accent slipping out.

the authority in his tone made two aggressive paparazzi instantly freeze and stumble backward.

sunk into the side of his suit jacket, inhaling the familiar scent of him, the blinding terror faded. you couldn't see the flashing lights anymore—only the dark fabric of his lapel. his arm around your shoulder was tight, protective, and immovable.

just like what happened in the airport last time.

he didn't just lead you through the crowd. he carried your momentum, guiding your steps smoothly across the chaotic area toward the car. "it's okay. you're okay," he murmured down into your hair, voice low and calm despite the madness raging around you. "a few more steps. the car is right there."

a sleek black sedan was idling at the curb with its door held open by a local driver. jay ushered you inside first. you slid across the black leather seat, breathless, your cheeks flushed. jay then ducked into the car right behind you, slamming the heavy door shut.

the deafening noise of the airport vanished instantly, replaced by the dead silence of tinted, soundproof glass. outside photographers had their lenses nearly pressed against the dark windows, but they couldn't see in.

you slumped back against the seat, your heart hammering wildly in your chest. jay turned to you immediately, his hands hovering over your shoulders, eyes frantically searching your face for any sign of distress. "are you alright? did anyone touch you? did you get hit?"

"no... no, i'm fine," you gasped out, looking up at him.

that mask of his was slipping again, revealing the concern underneath. his tie was slightly loosened from the physical push of the crowd, a stray strand of dark hair falling over his forehead, and his chest was heaving as he stared down at you.

"jay," you whispered softly, reaching out to touch his wrist. "i'm okay. you got me out."

jay looked down at your hand on his wrist, taking a slow breath to force his surging adrenaline down. his shoulders finally dropped, but he didn't pull away. in fact, in the tight area, his broad frame was still leaned in far too close, his knees practically resting against yours. "you're shaking," jay mumbled, eyes softening as he looked down at your hands.

before you could say anything, he reached up with his free hand. his fingers were slightly warm as he gently brushed a lock of hair away from your face, tucking it behind your ear.

an electric heat zipped straight through your stomach. your breath caught, a hot blush instantly creeping up your neck.

jay seemed to realize what he had just done a second too late. his fingers froze right by your jaw, his own throat working as he swallowed hard. a rosy tint appeared across his cheekbones. he slowly pulled his hands back, resting them on his lap. "sorry," he muttered quickly. "i... stray hair."

"it's fine," you squeaked out, clutching your bag a little tighter in your lap to hide how flustered you were. you swallowed, trying to find your voice. "you... you were really fast back there. and fluent in english."

a smile played at the edge of his lips. "military deployment in europe. you pick up a few things."

"right," you nodded, shifting on the leather seat, though you didn't actually move any further away from him. "well, for a second back there, i thought you were going to throw one of those photographers over your shoulder."

he let out an exhale that was almost a laugh. "i considered it."

you looked over at him, taking in his slightly disheveled hair and the loosened tie. the panic from the airport mob was gone, replaced by a fluttering tension that made the air feel heavy. "you told me in the plane," you whispered, leaning in. "when the noise gets too loud, i look at you."

he froze. his eyes flickered down to your lips before rising back to meet your gaze, filled with an intensity that made your pulse race. "and i'll always be right here for you to look at, yn," he promised.

the promise lingered in the air for the rest of the drive, wrapping around you like a warm shield even after the car pulled into the private underground basement of the hotel.

the hotel was pure, dizzying parisian opulence. your label had booked the entire top floor for the agency's executive team, but your personal space was a massive suite featuring grand gilded mirrors, towering marble fireplaces, and sweeping velvet drapes.

for three hours, the suite was a chaotic hive of activity. stylists, tailors, and managers bustled in and out, unboxing bags, adjusting rack after rack of fashion pieces for tomorrow's fitting, and barking updates over their phones. through it all, jay stood by the tall doors of the foyer.

by ten pm, the last bit of staff had finally bustled out, leaving behind a stack of schedule printouts and a suffocating silence.

you stood in the center of the massive living room, still wearing your soft travel clothes, feeling small and utterly dwarfed by the size of the room. the exhaustion of the flight and the lingering adrenaline from the airport had finally caught up to you, settling deep into your bones.

a soft knock at the open suite door broke your trance. jay stepped inside, carrying out his final security sweep for the night. he checked the heavy balcony latches, inspected the connecting door to the adjacent staff room, and verified the lock on the main entrance. "everything is secure," he said, turning back toward you. he had finally taken off his suit jacket, wearing just his dark waistcoat over his white shirt, his holster snug against his side. "i've checked with hotel security. the floor is restricted, and no one gets past the elevator without a pass."

"thank you, jay," you murmured, offering him a tired smile. "you should get some sleep too."

"my shift is just starting," he replied, walking toward the front door. "i'll be right outside in the hallway until the morning team arrives at six."

you blinked, stepping forward slightly. "wait... in the hallway. for like, eight hours?"

"it's standard protocol in public hotels," he explained, voice entirely matter-of-fact. "it keeps a visual barrier between you and any potential hotel intruders."

"jay, there's massive sofa right there," you said, gesturing toward the velvet couch in the living room. "the suite is huge. you don't have to stand in a cold corridor all night."

jay paused with his hand on the door handle. "i can't stay inside the suite overnight, yn," he responded to your offer. "if anyone from your label or the hotel staff sees me coming out of your room in the morning, it creates a massive risk for your reputation. i won't let my presence compromise you."

your heart did a painful twist. he wasn't thinking about his own comfort or how tiring an eight hour hallway shift would be. he was focused on protecting you, even from the whisper of a scandal.

he stepped backward into the carpeted hallway, giving you a slow, reassuring nod before pulling the door closed.

you were left alone in the suite. the silence in the room was loud. you walked over to the front door, standing only inches from the polished wood. you raised a hand, resting your palm flat against the cold surface.

without thinking twice, your fingers wrapped around the handle. you turned it and pulled the door open. jay jumped slightly, instantly turning around. his posture snapped back, eyes wide with immediate concern. "yn? is something wrong?"

"yes," you said firmly, crossing your arms over your chest and stepping right into the doorway. "something is wrong. i can't sleep."

"do you need me to call room service? or get hayoon—"

"i need you to stop being so stubborn," you interrupted, cutting him off. you looked down the long and empty hallway, then looked right up into his eyes. "jay, the morning team isn't coming until six am. hayoon explicitly told me everyone is sleeping until eight because of jet lag. besides, nobody is walking down this hall at one am."

"yn, protocol—"

"the protocol doesn't care if you drop from exhaustion before my biggest schedule of the year," you argued gently as you took a small step closer to him. "you flew for more than ten hours, got shoved by paparazzi, and spent three hours standing in my room while stylists screamed at each other. you need to rest too."

jay stared down at you, jaw set in a hard line. "my job is to keep you safe—"

"and my job right now is asking my bodyguard to step inside so i don't spend the whole night worrying about him standing outside my door," you leaned your shoulder against the doorframe. you looked at him through your lashes. "are you really going to make me sleep alone in this giant, creepy hotel room?"

jay let out a long breath through his nose. his shoulders dropped an inch, his composure cracking under your stubborn persistence. "you're unbelievable."

"i take that as a compliment," you grinned, stepping back into the suite and holding the door wide open for him. "come inside, jay. please."

he stood in the hallway for one last second, searching your face. seeing the genuine warmth and resolve in your eyes, he finally gave in. he stepped over the threshold into the room, and you quietly pushed the door shut, locking it. "i'll take the sofa," he said quietly. "if you need anything—"

"jay," you murmured, walking over to the linen closet by the hallway and pulled out a hotel blanket and a soft pillow. you walked back over and handed them to him, your fingers brushing his as he took them. "thank you for coming in. seriously."

he nodded once. "goodnight, yn."

"goodnight, jay," you whispered, a soft blush warming your cheeks as you walked toward your bedroom.

you closed your bedroom shut. you changed into a pair of cotton pajamas, slipped under the heavy blanket, and closed your eyes.

an hour passed. then two. despite the plush mattress and the physical exhaustion dragging at your limbs, sleep refused to come. your mind was racing—replaying the chaotic atmosphere in the airport, worrying about the schedule tomorrow, and of the man resting on the couch just outside.

feeling the walls closing in, you quietly slid out of bed. the living room was nearly pitch black, save for the faint silver moonlight filtering through the windows. on the sofa, jay was lying on his back, long legs stretching past the armrest. he had unbuttoned his suit jacket, his white shirt slightly rumpled, and his even breathing suggested he was finally asleep.

you tiptoed across the carpet, heading toward the glass doors that led to the balcony. as gently as you could, you lifted the latch and slid the door open.

click.

the tiny sound of the latch was almost silent, but the moment you stepped onto the cool terrace, you heard a swift rustle of fabric behind you. before you could even take a full breath, the balcony door slid open wider, and jay's tall shadow stepped into the moonlight.

"yn?" his voice was still rough with sleep, thick in the quiet night. his eyes scanned the balcony before landing on you. "is everything alright? is someone out there?"

"no, no," you whispered quickly, turning around and wrapping your arms around yourself. "just jet lag. couldn't sleep."

he relaxed his guard, letting out a long breath. the midnight breeze swept across the balcony, blowing a strand of his dark hair across his forehead. without his usual composure, standing on a balcony at two am, he looked vulnerable—and ridiculously handsome.

a sudden gust of wind blew off, making you shiver visibly in your thin pajamas.

without a second thought, jay reached behind him, grabbing his suit jacket from where he had draped it over the sofa back. he stepped back out, moving behind you with quiet strides.

"you're going to catch a cold." he draped his jacket around your shoulders. the fabric was warm and drenched in his scent. you pulled the lapels tight around your chest, melting into the heat of it. "thank you," you muttered, looking up at him over your shoulder.

other than stepping back into the room, jay rested his large hands against the iron railing right beside you, looking out at the city skyline. below, the streets glistened like glass under the yellow streetlights, and in the distance, the eiffel tower glowed against the dark sky.

you leaned your elbows on the railing next to his, your shoulder lightly resting against his arm.

"is paris everything you thought it'd be?" you asked, watching the faint mist drift over rooftops. "or is it just another city on a security detail map for you?"

he let out the smallest chuckle you'd ever heard. "most cities look the same when you're looking at them through a rearview mirror or behind a cordon line. buildings, roads, and potential threat points." he paused, eyes softening slightly. "it's rare i actually get a second to just stand still and look at one."

"so look," you murmured, leaning your head back slightly to glance up at his profile. "no cameras, no agency reps, no threats. just paris. what do you see?"

a genuine smile tugged at the corner of his lips. "i see a city that takes its streetlights very seriously. and a lot of chimney pots."

your let out a soft laugh into the cool air, shaking your head. "you really have zero romantic bone in your body, don't you? what's the threat level of an eiffel tower light show?"

"a mild distraction," he shrugged, turning his head to look down at you. "it's a perfect time to commit a crime because nobody pays attention to their surroundings while staring at sparkles."

"you're hopeless," you giggled, burying your lower face slightly into the collar of his jacket. "what do you do when you're not guarding people? do you ever just... sit on a porch and do nothing?"

"i ride my motorcycle," he said quietly. "usually early in the morning before traffic starts. long highways with nowhere in particular to be."

you blinked, shocked. "you ride a motorcycle?" you asked. he nodded, "i do."

you tilted your head, "why did i picture you just standing in a dark room recharging like a robot?"

a low laugh came from him—a rich sound that sent a pleasant shiver down your spine. "i have hobbies too, yn. i read. i cook when i have time."

"you cook?" you raised an eyebrow, genuinely fascinated. "what's the signature dish of a top-tier security guard?"

"stew," he answered without missing a beat, a tiny glint of humor in his eyes. "simple, hard to ruin, plus it lasts three days. not exactly michelin star standard, but it works."

"i'd take a bowl of home cooked stew over those five course dinners any day," you admitted wholeheartedly, resting your chin on your hands as you leaned over the railing. "you have no idea how much i miss normal food. half the time, hayoon even counts out my almonds."

jay's smile faded slightly, replaced by an attentive warmth. he shifted his weight, turning his frame toward you. "what's the first thing you want to eat when this whole tour is over?"

"convenience store ramen," you answered right away, a dreamlike sigh escaping your lips. "the cheap spicy kind. at three in the morning, sitting on those plastic chairs outside under the streetlights with a soft-boiled egg."

he looked at you for a long beat. in the slightly dim light, his eyes held a softness that made your chest tighten.

"deal," jay murmured. "deal?" you asked, perking up an eyebrow.

"when we get back, after the show schedules end," he started. "i'll take you to the convenience store at three in the morning. i'll buy the ramen, and i'll make sure nobody bothers you while you eat it."

you stared at him, caught off guard by the sincerity in his offer. it was such a mundane thing, but coming from him, it felt like the most luxurious promise in the world. "you'd really do that?" you whispered. "sit outside in the freezing cold while i eat junk food?"

"i've stood in worse places," he replied, his fingers on the railing shifting just a little closer to yours. "besides... you deserve to just exist for an hour without being an idol."

in the cool air, wrapped in his heavy jacket with his broad shoulder resting warm against yours, the heavy stress of tomorrow faded into nothingness for a while.

but when the sun rose again and the real test was about to begin, the stress washed over you once again.

the suite was finally empty after hours of chaos. the styling team had just rushed out the door to catch their transport to the venue, leaving you standing alone in front of the large mirror.

you barely recognized the woman staring back at you.

your label had pulled out all the stops for fashion week, dressing you in a silk, floor-length gown in a deep shade. the off-shoulder sleeves draped elegantly over your upper arms, exposing the line of your collarbones. but the true detail was the back that completely got cut away to expose your spine, held together by a tiny clasp at the nape of your neck. your hair was swept up into an updo to display the design, and your makeup was flawless.

you looked every inch the global idol the world expected to see.

picking up your small clutch, you walked toward the entrance door of the suite. your heart wasn't hammering only for the cameras waiting at the venue. it was also for the man standing on the other side.

you turned the handle and pulled the door open, stepping out into the carpeted hallway. jay was standing by the elevators, speaking quietly into the microphone at his wrist. when he heard the door click, he turned around, and the words he was speaking immediately died in his throat.

if you thought jay looked handsome in his standard suits, seeing him in a meticulously tailored black tuxedo was devastating. the sharp cut of the dark fabric emphasized the breadth of his shoulders and chest, while the white shirt and black bowtie made him look more like a high-society heir.

you stood there, suddenly aware of how bare your shoulders and back felt in the cool air.

jay didn't move. his hand slowly dropped to his side, eyes sweeping over you—taking in the draped silk, the exposed slope of your shoulders, and the long line of your neck before finally landing on your face. he breathed heavily, gaze darkening, making the air between you feel incredibly thin.

"is it... too much?" you asked nervously, shifting your weight. "they wanted something good for the cameras, but i feel a little bare."

jay swallowed hard, the movement visible above his bowtie. he took a slow step toward you, as if pulled by a magnetic force he couldn't fight. "no," he murmured. "it's not too much." he stopped just two feet away, looking down at you with an expression so unguarded it made a hot blush explode across your chest and neck. he wasn't looking at an idol or a client. he was looking at you.

"you look..." he started, voice trailing off as he shook his head slightly, trying to clear the fog in his brain. "you are absolutely beautiful, yn."

the honesty in his voice sent a blinding jolt of electricity straight to your heart. "thank you," you breathed out, voice trembling slightly. you looked up at him through your lashes, a smile tugging at your lips. "you clean up pretty well yourself."

a faint grin appeared at the edge of his lips. and for a second, he looked like he wanted to close the final two feet between you and forget the event entirely.

instead, the elevator chimed at the end of the hall, breaking the spell. jay blinked, the harsh reality of his job snapping back into place. he cleared his throat, adjusting his tuxedo cuffs. "the car's waiting downstairs," he said as he stepped aside and extended a hand toward the open elevator doors. "stay close to me tonight."

"always," you replied, brushing past him.

the drive to the venue felt like a surreal blur. sitting side by side in the dimmed seat of the sedan, the heat between you was palpable, even if neither of you spoke. jay sat beside you, eyes continually scanning the streets, but every time the streetlights washed over the car, you could see his jaw clenching.

when the car finally turned onto the venue, the night exploded into blinding light. hundreds of press outlets, fan sections, and security barricades lined the grand staircase. high-powered spotlights illuminated the area, cutting through the dark city.

when the car rolled to a halt at the edge of the red carpet, jay ducked out first. the moment he stepped outside, a barrage of flashbulbs went off. he opened your door, holding his hand over the frame.

"eyes on me until you reach the photographer's mark, alright?" he instructed quietly, his voice slicing through the roar of the crowd as he reached to offer you his steady arm. you nodded and placed a hand on his forearm, feeling the muscle beneath the fabric.

the moment your heels hit the carpet, the sound was deafening.

"yn, over here!" "look to the left, yn!" "yn! beaux-arts magazine!"

flashes erupted in a continuous, blinding wave. shutter clicks buzzed like a hive of hornets, echoing. fans shrieked from behind the metal barricades, waving hand banners and lightsticks.

you let go of jay's arm to take your place on the step, turning smoothly to the wall of lenses. you threw back your shoulders, allowing the silk gown to drape perfectly against your skin, and put on your practiced smile.

to the global press and the thousands of cameras, you were the star of the evening.

but behind the blinding white flashes, the overwhelming noise began to swarm in your ears. the dizzying lights started to merge into a disorienting glare. your heart accelerated inside your chest, your breath catching in your throat as the familiar wave of anxiety threatened to break your smile.

look at me. his voice from the airplane played in your mind.

glancing slightly to the side, your eyes searched the dark perimeter. standing just off the edge of the carpet was jay. he stood like an immovable pillar in his tuxedo, hands resting in front of him, eyes locked onto you. amidst a sea of screaming strangers, his gaze was unwavering.

the moment your eyes met his, the chaotic flashes and roaring noise faded into a background hum. the tension in your shoulders melted.

you gave the cameras one final and radiant smile before stepping off the mark and moving up the steps that led to the main entry doors. jay fell seamlessly into step two paces behind you, broad shadow sweeping over the carpet as he flanked your side.

as you reached the doors, jay reached past you to push them open. for a second, as you passed through, he leaned down close to your ear, his warm breath fanning across the sensitive skin of your bare shoulder.

"flawless," he whispered, low enough that only you could hear.

a sudden, thrilling shudder ran straight down your back as you stepped inside the ballroom, leaving blinding lights behind.

inside the venue, the air was warm, sweet with the scent of white orchids, expensive perfume, and vintage champagne. golden chandeliers cast a rich glow, illuminating the sea of international fashion royalty.

to anyone watching, you were navigating the room with effortless grace. you accepted glass flutes of champagne, posed for shots with famous directors, and offered elegant small talk to brand executives.

after hours of back-to-back introductions, the main hall became suffocatingly packed. a crowd of vips and photographers began surging around the central area, choking the narrow passageway leading toward the private lounge.

"excuse us," jay sounded from right behind you, calm yet commanding enough to make people step aside. he stepped up beside you to clear a path through the dense crowd. because of how tightly squeezed the guests were, there was barely any clearance between the tabled and the people around them.

to keep you from being jostled by anyone, jay stepped closer—so close you could feel the heat radiating off his chest.

slowly, he raised his hand. instead of hovering, his large palm settled gently against the small of your back, making your breath hitch in your throat.

his hand rested right over the exposed skin where your gown was cut away. his skin was a grounding contrast against the soft silk of your dress. a jolt of hot electricity shot straight up to your neck, making your toes curl inside your heels.

you glanced up at him through your lashes. jay was looking straight ahead, his jaw set in an impassive line as if he were simply performing a protocol. but as your eyes traveled up to his face, you caught the subtle heavy breathing. his throat worked as he gulped, and a dark flush had crept up the back of his neck beneath his shirt collar.

when you finally broke through the crowd into a quieter area, jay slowly slid his hand away from your back. the sudden loss of his heat felt like a cold breeze against your skin.

"the private lounge is just around the corner," he mentioned. "you can catch your breath there."

"thanks to you," you mumbled softly, cheeks flushed as you looked at him, the ghost of his touch still burning against your skin.

you then turned the corner into the dimly lit hallway toward the lounge. the muffled sound of music and chatter echoed softly, giving you a rare second to catch your breath away from the sea of people and cameras. before you could even step through the doorway, a slurred voice called out to you.

"ah, the star of the night!" a european fashion investor in his late fifties wearing a velvet suit and holding an empty champagne glass stumbled out from the door. his eyes locked onto you, a wide grin spreading across his features. "i've been trying to get an introduction all evening," he purred, taking fast steps toward you. "you look stunning in that dress. truly breathtaking."

you instinctively took a step back, keeping your professional smile firmly glued to your face. "thank you so much. it's an honor to be here tonight—"

"no, no, don't be so modest," he interrupted your words, stepping even closer. before you could react, he reached out, hand moving toward your shoulder to pull you into an unwelcoming embrace. "come, let me introduce you to my associates. we should discuss your next campaign over a real drink—"

but before he could finish his sentence and touch you, jay stepped in between you. his frame completely cut off the investor's path and shielded you from view. his movement was so fast it caught the investor off guard, making the man stumble backward. "step back, sir," jay ordered.

the investor blinked, face flushing with anger as he looked up at the towering bodyguard. "who the hell do you think you're talking to? i'm one of the primary sponsors for this entire gala! move out of my way."

the man made a mistake of trying to push past jay's shoulder because jay didn't even flinch—not even the littlest bit.

he took a step closer, eyes narrowing into a terrifying stare. "you've had too much to drink, sir," he pointed out in a calm voice, yet each word was delivered with terrifying precision. "you will turn around, step back into the lounge, and keep your hands to yourself. am i clear?"

the fury coming from jay was so palpable it made the air thick. the investor looked away from jay, the anger in his eyes instantly evaporating into fear.

"r—right," he muttered, backing up and raising his hands defensively. he quickly turned on his heel and disappeared.

jay didn't turn around immediately. he stood there for a long beat, chest heaving with controlled breaths as he forced his adrenaline back down. the professional veneer he had worn all night was gone and now replaced by an intensity he couldn't hide anymore.

slowly, he turned around to face you. his eyes scanned your face frantically. "are you alright?" he questioned, voice carrying a breathless edge. "he didn't touch you, right?"

you shook your head as you looked at him. your heart started pounding, not from fear of the investor, but from the sight of jay fiercely defending you. "no, i'm fine."

jay looked down at you, swallowing a lump in his throat. the restraint holding him back was fraying by a thread. "we're leaving. i'll have the driver bring the car around the private exit."

"okay," your voice was small.

he extended his hand, his fingers gently wrapping around your wrist and guided you down the back corridor toward the private exit.

later on, when the car finally pulled into the hotel's private underground garage, jay was out the door in an instant, opening yours and extending his hand. the moment your palm met his, his long fingers closed firmly over yours, guiding you through the elevator and up to your floor without letting go until you reached your suite.

waiting inside were your lead makeup artist and hairstylist, looking completely exhausted from the long night.

"oh, thank god you're back!" hayoon gasped, taking your clutch and ushering you to the vanity they had set up in the living room. "we've been waiting to get this makeup off you before we go to sleep."

for the next twenty minutes, jay stood guard in his spot by the foyer while the stylists got to work. they quickly pulled out the hundreds of hairpins holding your updo together until your hair fell in soft waves past your shoulders. with soft cotton pads, they wiped away the makeup, leaving your skin clean and glowing in the lights.

"alright, that's the face and hair," hayoon sighed as your stylists began cleaning up. "the gown is super delicate silk, so just unhook the back clasp yourself when you're ready to slip into bed. hang it on the padded hanger in the closet after that."

you nodded, listening carefully to get everything correct soon. "i will. thank you, hayoon. goodnight."

"goodnight. get enough sleep, okay?" she smiled at you. and with a final wave, hayoon and the stylists gathered their heavy bags and bustled out the front door.

you stood in the center of the living room, feeling completely stripped down. your hair was down, your face was bare, but you were still wearing the gown.

jay stepped back inside. he had loosened his bowtie, unbuttoning the top collar of his shirt. his eyes found yours across the room. "i'll be right out here," he said. "if you need anything before you go to sleep."

"thanks, jay," you whispered, holding his gaze for a beat before turning toward your bedroom. you left the door cracked halfway open so the warm light from the living room spilled across the floor.

exhaustion settled deep into your bones, heavy and dragging. you walked over to the nightstand, throat feeling completely parched after hours of talking to people and smiling for the media. the crystal water carafe sat beside a glass.

with shaking hands, you lifted the carafe and tipped it over the glass. but your fingers, stiff and numb, slipped. the glass tipped over and fell with a sharp sound. "oh—!"

a sudden deluge of cold water splashed violently across the nightstand, surging over the edge and spilling down the front side of your outfit. the liquid soaked through the fabric, turning it dark and heavy.

panic surged through you. the gown. it was a one-of-a-kind haute couture piece on loan, worth more than a sports car. and silk was ruined by water spots if left to set.

"shit, shit, shit," you muttered under your breath, gathering the dipping fabric in your hands to keep it from soaking through any further.

you reached up behind your neck to unhook the clasp so you could strip the dress off immediately, but your hands were slippery and trembling. you blindly fumbled at the nape of your neck, nails catching uselessly against the tiny hook. it wouldn't budge. in fact, in your frantic movements, the tiny hook jammed tightly.

before you could even call out, heavy footsteps echoed across the floor. the bedroom was pushed wide open, and jay's frame filled the entryway, eyes wide and scanning the room for danger.

"yn! what happened?" he demanded as he looked over at the spilled water, and then to you.

"i—i dropped the glass," you stammered, holding the cold silk away from your body, shivering as the cold liquid seeped against your skin. "it spilled everywhere. the gown is getting soaked, but the back clasp is jammed. i can't get it off."

you gulped, then asked, "can you help me?"

for a second, jay froze. the urge to retreat into his professional boundary was warring violently with the need to take care of you. and slowly, visibly, the bodyguard yielded to the man.

he closed the distance between you with deliberate strides, boots making no sound against the thick rug. as he stepped up behind you, the smell of him enveloped you, warm and grounding. "don't move," he mumbled. "let me look."

you let out a shaky breath, letting your arms drop to your sides. you stood still as he loomed right behind you.

his large hands lifted, approaching your skin with caution. the pads of his thumbs finally made contact with your skin to feel for the jammed clasp. his breath caught in his throat. his hands froze against your neck for a second before he forced himself to focus.

"is it stuck?" you inquired, voice trembling as you looked down at the floor, aware of how bare your back felt against him.

"the hook caught the thread lining," he replied, voice vibrating right near the shell of your ear. "i'm afraid if i pull too hard, i'll tear the silk. i have to unloop it."

"do you always have to be this precise, or is unhooking dresses part of your security training?" you joked, a small laugh rumbling from your chest to mask the wild pounding of your heart. a quiet chuckle left jay, the sound sending a wave of heat through you.

"they don't teach this in the military," he murmured, knuckles accidentally brushing against the soft skin behind your ear as he worked the stubborn knot. "and no... i'm not usually this precise."

your breath hitched. "you're not?"

"no," he whispered, fingers fumbling with the clasp. his face was inches away from your hair, resulting in his warm breath fanning gently across your bare shoulder, making goosebumps erupt over your skin. "with anyone else, i'd probably just cut the thread and be done with it. but i don't want to ruin anything that's yours."

the quiet honesty in his voice hung heavy in the air. the dripping water, the ruined gown—all of it faded into insignificance. there was only the heat of his hands, the sound of your shared breathing, and the unbearable tension between you.

soon enough, the small click of the clasp releasing echoed through the room. the heavy silk immediately loosened around your collarbones, sliding an inch down your back. you reflexively gathered the front of the gown against your chest with a hand, holding it tight to keep it from slipping any further.

you slowly turned. his face was mere inches from yours, his sharp jawline set so hard the muscle was visibly twitching. "jay..." you called with a small voice. "are you always this careful with your clients?"

jay's dark eyes flickered down to your shoulder, then to your lips, before snapping back up to meet your gaze. for three agonizing seconds, the air in the room felt devoid of oxygen.

then, his eyes turned cold. it was like watching an iron curtain drop over his face. he took a sharp step backward, creating space. he didn't answer your question. he didn't even look you in the eye. instead, he turned slightly toward the doorway, hands smoothing down the front of his shirt. "you should change into something dry so you don't catch a cold. i'll tell hayoon to laundry the dress first thing in the morning."

you stared at him, stunned by the sudden wall he had just thrown up. "jay, wait—"

"i'll be right outside like always," he cut you off, voice clipped and distant as he made a move toward the door. "get some rest, yn. you have more activities tomorrow."

"look at me."

jay stopped mid-step with his back still to you. his massive shoulders were rigid, hands clenching into tight fists at his sides.

"jay," you repeated, taking a step toward him. "look at me and tell me that. tell me i'm just a client."

"you are my client, yn," he replied, voice strained, though he still refused to face you. "my job is to ensure your physical safety. nothing more, nothing less. i stepped out of line tonight by invading your personal space, and for that, i apologize. it won't happen again."

the textbook corporate answer made a disbelieving laugh escape your lips. "you're lying," you whispered, stepping around him until you were standing directly in his path, forcing him to look at you. when his eyes finally locked onto yours, he swallowed hard. and for a mere moment, he cracked, revealing a storm raging beneath his stiff posture.

"yn, step back," he warned softly. "please."

"no," you denied stubbornly, standing your ground, looking right up into his tortured gaze. "why are you pushing me away? why do you act like caring about me is a crime?"

"because it is!" the sharp roar tore from jay's chest. he took one sudden step forward, his body completely towering over you, closing the distance until his chest was practically pressing against yours.

"it is a crime, yn," he rasped out, eyes burning with a fire as he looked down at you, breathing ragged. "because my only job, the only thing i am supposed to do, is keep you alive. i'm supposed to look at a crowd and keep you away from any possible danger. i'm supposed to look at people and see threats. i am not supposed to spend every second of every day losing my fucking mind wondering if you're cold, or if you've eaten, or if you're smiling at someone else."

he raked a hand through his hair, dragging it back with an agitated groan, pacing a tight circle before rounding back to you.

"do you have any idea what the last four months have been like for me?" his voice dropped into a desperate whisper. "watching you stand under those cameras every night, seeing you look so pretty in those dresses, feeling you lean against me when you're tired... i'm falling apart, yn. i crossed a line the second i stopped seeing you as a client and started seeing you as the only thing in this miserable world i care about."

he stopped right in front of you, hands hovering in the air near your waist, trembling violently with the effort of keeping himself from pulling you into his arms.

"i'm scared," he confessed, voice breaking on the last word. "because if i'm looking at you, if i'm thinking about how much i want to touch you, how much i want to keep you... then, i'm not doing my job. and if something happens to you because i was distracted by how much i love you, i will never, ever, recover."

jay stood frozen before you, his broad chest heaving, hands hovering midair as if terrified that if he touched you, he would break the final thread of his control. his eyes were filled with desperation, searching your face for any kind of disgust or reaction.

rather than that, you felt a wave of overwhelming warmth flood your heart. you then raised your free hand and placed you soft palm directly against his cheek.

jay flinched at the contact, a sharp gasp catching in his throat. his skin was burning hot beneath your fingers, his sharp jawline tight as a bowstring. he looked down at you like a man standing on the edge of a cliff, waiting for the fall.

"you idiot," you whispered softly, letting out a breathy laugh as a tear slipped down your cheek. "you absolute idiot."

jay blinked, eyebrows scrunched in confusion. "yn..."

"do you really think you're the only one losing your mind?" you asked, voice trembling with an emotion so deep it made your knees feel weak. you smoothed your thumb gently across his cheekbone, feeling the pulse leaping beneath the skin. "do you i think i look for you in every crowd because you're good at your job? do you think i feel safe on those planes and red carpets because of your security credentials?"

he stared at you, his breathing shallow, completely paralyzed by the gentle touch of your hand.

"i look for you," you confessed, looking him dead in the eye with no effort to hide anything anymore. "because you're the only real thing in my life. because when the entire world is screaming and flashing lights in my face, catching your eye is the only thing that keeps me breathing. i haven't seen you as just my bodyguard for a long time, jay. i'm completely, hopelessly in love with you."

his breath hitched violently. the relief that washed over his features was breathtaking. the fear in his eyes melted away and replaced by a flame that made your pulse race.

"say that again," he rasped out.

"i love you, jay," you whispered sweetly, closing the tiny remaining distance between you until the toes of your bare feet brushed his boots. "i love you, and i don't give a single fuck about the rules."

jay let out a gut wrenching groan, and the months of restraint and professional boundaries evaporated into thin air.

his hand shot forward, cupping the back of your neck with a possessive tenderness, long fingers threading deeply into your hair. his other arm wrapped around your waist, pulling your body flush against his solid chest.

before you could even catch your breath, he bent down and captured your lips in a deep kiss.

a quiet gasp escaped your mouth against his, and he used the opportunity to deepen the kiss, claiming you entirely. it was an explosive, electric collision of everything you both had been suppressing. his lips were hot, demanding, and entirely intoxicated by you.

you let go of the gown completely, letting the heavy silk crumple and fall to the floor at your feet, leaving you only in your undergarments. you threw both of your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, fingers entangling in his soft hair.

jay shuddered against you as he felt the soft curve of your waist and chest pressed directly against his white shirt. his hand on your back pressed you impossibly closer, his thumb stroking the bare skin with a desperate heat as if proving to himself that you were really here, really his.

he pulled back for a second, just enough to catch a deep breath, his forehead resting against yours. his eyes were blown wide, glazed with pure devotion. "there's no going back from this," he murmured. "you know that, right? once i cross this line... i don't think i can let you go."

"good," you whispered, fingers tightening in the hair at the nape of his neck. "don't ever let me go, jay."

a sharp exhale tore from his chest as the last remaining shred of his legendary discipline shattered into dust.

before you could blink, jay's hands slid down from your back, calloused palms sweeping over the curve of your hips. with effortless, terrifying strength, he lifted you completely off your feet. you let out a soft gasp, wrapping your legs tightly around his waist, pulling yourself flush against him.

he took three steps toward the massive king sized bed in the center of the room. he lowered you onto the sheets gently, immediately following you down. the size and weight of his frame shadowed over you, trapping you beneath him in a cocoon of expensive cologne and blinding heat.

his lips found yours again, deeper, hotter, and entirely unchecked. the kiss was no longer cautious—it was a hungry and feverish demand, his tongue tasting every inch of your mouth while his hands mapped out the bare skin of your waist, his thumbs pressing firmly into your hips to hold you right where he wanted you.

you arched your back into his touch, a helpless whimper catching in your throat as his lips trailed down from your mouth, leaving a trail of fire along your jawline, down the exposed curve of your neck, and onto the sensitive hollow of your collarbone.

"jay," you gasped out, hands dragging desperately down his broad back, clutching at the thin cotton of his shirt.

"i've dreamed about this," he groaned against your skin, voice dropping into a rough growl right near your ear. his hands moved up, fingers entangling in your locks, holding your head and tilting it back as his eyes locked onto yours. "every night in the hallway... every time i watched you leave... i was losing my mind."

he shifted, one of his heavy thighs sliding between yours, the solid press of his body sending a wave of pure heat straight to your core. his fingers trailed down from your collarbone, brushing agonizingly slow over your bare stomach, making every nerve ending in your body flare to life.

"tell me what you want, yn," he growled low, knuckles lightly tracing the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. "tell me, and i'll give it to you."

"want you... to make me feel good."

hearing your words, with a small groan, he crashed his lips back onto yours. the kiss was feverish, full of desperation and broken composure. his mouth moved from yours, trailing small kisses from your jaw to your neck, biting slightly on the skin before soothing it with his tongue. the feeling of his teeth received a whimper from you.

he looked at your chest before locking his eyes with yours. "can i...?" he asked for permission. and when you nodded, he wasted no time reaching and unclipping your bra, throwing them elsewhere you couldn't care less of.

when your breasts were freed, he took a moment to stare at them before taking his hesitant hands to cup them. you let out a soft sigh at the feel of his slightly rough hands on them, arching your back as a sign you wanted more.

seeing your reaction, jay leaned down and flicked a bud with his tongue. you hissed, hand moving to grip on his upper arm.

he took it in his mouth instantly, suckling on them as he fondled with the other. you threw your head back at the pleasure, a moan escaping your lips. he then moved to the other, giving it the same stimulation.

"love your tits, yn... fuck," he breathed out. he left one last peck before going down to your stomach.

the pace he held was painfully and annoyingly slow, making you squirm. "mmh... fuck, jay, please— just... just touch me," you pleaded, growing impatient. he chuckled lowly, the sound giving you shivers. "patience, baby. wanna take my time with you," he said before continuing his actions, receiving a whimper from you.

when he finally reached the waistband of your panties, he hooked his fingers around it and slowly pulled it down. with your legs spread, he got a clear view of your aching vagina. "shit... what a pretty pussy," he praised, fingers finding your clit. you shut your eyes and whined, "ah—! jay... more, pleaseee."

"as you wish, beautiful."

he took no time to kneel, leaving a kiss on top of your pussy. you clenched around nothing at the feather-light peck. jay poked out his tongue, dragging a long lick from your hole to your clit, making your hip buck up to his face. "tastes so fucking good," he mumbled before immediately diving in, leaving no space for you to prepare.

you threw your head back on the bed with a loud cry. your hand reached to grip his hair. "agh—! jay, shit!" you spat, thighs quivering from the sudden pleasure. he grunted at the taste of you, "so fuckin' sweet." he gripped onto your thighs, keeping them in place when you started closing them around his head.

to top it off, he inserted two fingers into your hole, curling them in an instant. your back arched off the bed. you let out a choked gasp, fingers tightening and tugging on his hair. he pumped his fingers in and out at a punishing speed, tongue sucking on your clitoris.

it felt so good. too good.

you looked down at him, and the view you received was breathtaking. jay's eyes were already looking up at yours, his hair was tousled, and his nose and chin were all covered and glistening from your juices. it only turned you on more, grinding your hips.

"close... 'm close—" you managed to mumble. "yeah? you want to cum?" jay hummed, voice sending vibrations through you. you nodded with a whine.

"cum for me. cum all over my face, baby."

you moaned loudly as you climaxed, body jerking. your pussy tightened around jay's fingers as you let go.

as you came down from your high, you evened your heaving chest. jay slipped his fingers out without forgetting to suck them clean. "god, yn. you looked so hot coming all around my fingers like that," he whispered seductively. you couldn't give a proper response, too blissed out.

he straightened, leaning down to close the distance between you again. you returned the kiss, able to taste yourself on his tongue. jay leaned back, searching your face for any sign of discomfort. "you okay? want to keep going? no pressure, baby, we can stop right here if you want."

you shook your head. "n—no... want more... please," you looked up at him through your eyelashes. your sweet voice intoxicated jay, "okay. anything you want."

in the blink of an eye, his shirt was off, revealing his toned body that he'd been hiding all this time. your breath caught in your throat, blinking once. he laughed softly at your reaction, "like the view, hm?" he asked. you rolled your eyes with a grin, "don't be so full of yourself, jay"

he bent down to give you a single peck before working on his pants, sliding them down along with his boxers. his thick, hard, throbbing cock slipped out, slapping against his stomach. it was thick, red, and veiny, you nearly drooled at the sight. you sat up, and when jay felt your fingers wrapping around his shaft, he let out a moan. "shit... your hands—" he grunted, gritting his teeth.

but when you started stroking him, he held your wrist, making you stop your movements. "just lay down, baby. want to focus on you tonight."

so you obliged. you shifted toward the middle of the bed, laying back down. jay climbed up on the bed, kneeling between your legs. "do you have a condom?" he questioned. "no. want you raw inside me, jay," you answered in a small voice.

he smirked, "naughty girl."

he took a hold of his dick, lining it up with your pussy. the skin-to-skin contact made you shudder. he started grinding against you, the head of his cock brushing your clit every once in a while. "put it in, baby, please," you croaked. he smiled, "anything you say."

he lined up with your entrance. afraid to hurt you, he slid in halfway first. the stretch of his length was burning, but it felt incredible. "hah—" you sighed shakily. jay grunted, "ngh— so tight," he mumbled to himself before biting his lip.

he looked at you sincerely, "is it too much? can i keep going?" his voice was soft, full of care. it made your heart flutter how he cared for you in such a situation. "yes, please keep going," you whimpered.

he nodded before pushing in, then burying himself to the hilt, resulting in the both of you moaning. you felt so full. "my god, jay. so big... so full," you gasped, rolling your eyes back. "yeah? mmh, you're so tight around me," he growled.

jay slowly pulled back, leaving the tip in, then pushed himself back in. you cried out, fingers gripping tightly onto the sheets. "agh—! moremoremore," you chanted.

fulfilling your needs, jay started thrusting in and out of you softly. he gripped onto your waist. "feel so good around me." and suddenly, he moved quicker, making you whimper uncontrollably. he continued to fuck himself into you, grinding slightly every time he bottomed out, the movement making him go deeper.

"harder, jay. please... need it so bad," you moaned out. he grinned, "god, you're going to make me lose my mind."

he propped himself up and held your thighs open with his hands. he drove himself inside you harder, the sounds of your skin slapping against each other filling the room. you threw your head back, "jay! nghhh, so good!" you screamed, unable to contain your sounds.

"mhm... you're such a good fuckin' girl, baby. taking my cock so well," he praised.

the nickname made you clench around him, receiving a groan from him. "shit— do that again," he ordered. when you did, he scrunched his eyebrows and left his mouth open. the mere sight of him made you moan. he looked so fucked out—hair messy, abs tensed, and you caught a little sliver of drool on the tip of his lips.

the room was so hot it made you dizzy. you bit your lip hard, you swore you could taste your blood. "jay! i'm gonna cum again!" you whimpered. "yeah, fuck... you going to cum around my big cock?" he whispered, cocking an eyebrow at you.

you nodded, "mhm, please!"

he grunted, thrusting harder to reach his climax. "mmh— wait for me, baby. you can wait just a little longer, right?" he asked ever so softly, bending down to land a kiss on your neck. "you're a good girl, right?"

you nodded quickly at his words, "mhm! yeah, yeah, i'm a good girl— you're good girl—!"

he smiled, satisfied. "fuck, yeah. my good, beautiful girl," he muttered, shoving in and out of you with an even faster pace, if that was even possible. you couldn't think anymore, the pleasure taking over your mind. "i'm close, yn, fuck—" he threw his head back.

"come with me."

at his words, you quivered. you released with a moan, tightening around him unconsciously. jay's pace faltered slightly as he gave one last thrust, shooting his load inside you with a loud groan. the both of you breathed, chests rising and falling deeply. jay's body limped, falling to lay down beside you, cock slipping out.

you laid tangled in the white sheets, breathing slowly evening out as the wild adrenaline in your veins melted into a deep exhaustion. beside you, jay shifted. he pulled the blanket up over your shoulder, tucking the soft fabric around your chest to protect you from the cool night air.

he gathered you against his bare body, his muscular arm sliding beneath your waist to draw your body flush against his solid frame. you rested your head right over his heart, listening to the steady thud of his pulse. his fingers gently smoothed the damp strands of hair away from your forehead and face. "how are you feeling?" he asked.

"perfect," you whispered, voice tired. you pressed a soft, lingering peck against the skin of his collarbone. "just a little tired."

"i know, baby," he mumbled against your temple, resting his lips gently against your skin for a long moment. "just rest. i've got you."

he shifted carefully, propping himself up on one elbow so as not to disturb you. he reached for a washcloth that rested on the bedside table. with painstaking care, he wiped the traces of sweat from your neck, shoulder, and chest. every brush of the cloth was accompanied by a press of his lips against your skin. "jay," you breathed out. "you don't have to..."

"i want to," he muttered, eyes shining as he looked down at you. he set the cloth down and cradled your jaw in his hand, thumb caressing your cheekbone. "for months, all i could do was watch over you from a distance. i had to pretend i didn't care. taking care of you now... it's all i want."

the unfiltered honesty in his voice broke down the very last piece of your heart. you reached up, placing your hand over his.

he laid back down, pulling you tight against his side. he tucked your head beneath his chin, wrapping his arm around you so completely that you felt sheltered from the outside world. his thumb drew circles against your hip. "go to sleep, yn. i'm right here."

you let out a long sigh, burying your face into the crook of his neck. with the beat of his heart beneath your ear, you finally closed your eyes and drifted off.

when you finally woke, the sunlight was already streaming through the curtains, painting the bed in warm light.

you stretched lazily, hand reaching out across the sheets to find the familiar feeling of jay—only to meet empty linen. you blinked your eyes open, sitting up slowly. a momentary flutter of anxiety touched your chest before you caught the rich aroma of freshly brewed coffee and warm pastries wafting into the bedroom.

slipping out of bed, you wrapped jay's oversized shirt around yourself, rolling the sleeves up past your wrists and letting the hem fall to your mid-thigh. it smelled intensely of him, the warmth grounding you immediately. stepping out on bare feet, you walked silently into the living room.

standing by the dining table was jay. he was wearing a simple t-shirt and dark trousers, hair still damp from a quick shower. he had his back turned to you, completely focused on arranging a room service breakfast tray that had gotten delivered. in the center of the table stood a small glass vase with a yellow sunflower he must have requested.

you leaned against the doorframe, a soft grin spreading across your face. as if sensing your gaze, jay turned his head.

the moment he saw you, the edge in his posture disappeared. a smile broke across his sharp face, a quiet happiness you had never seen him in before. "good morning, beautiful."

he set down the things he was holding and crossed the room. the moment he reached you, his hands settled gently on your waist, pulling you flush against him. he leaned down, capturing your lips in a kiss that tasted of clean mint and sweet coffee. it wasn't rushed or full of caution, it was deep and full of an unfiltered joy that made your heart soar.

"good morning," you muttered against his lips, wrapping your arms around his neck and rising on your tiptoes to press another quick kiss to his jawline. "i woke up and thought you ran away."

a rumble left his chest, "not a chance. you're stuck with me now."

he pulled back just enough to look down at you, eyes dancing as his gaze dropped to the large shirt hanging off your shoulders. "though i have to say," he added, thumb lightly rubbing the bare skin of your hip where the shirt split open, "that shirt looks significantly better on you than it ever did on me."

you flushed and giggled. "it's really comfy. and it smells like you."

"keep it," he said. he tucked a loose strand of hair behind your hair, his calloused fingers lingering against your cheek. "come on. i had room service bring up breakfast before hayoon starts blowing up your phone."

he took your hand, lacing his fingers firmly through yours, and led you over to the dining table. he pulled out the chair for you with effortless charm, pressing a warm peck to the top of your head before settling into the chair beside you.

as nice as it was, the peace of that morning didn't last long. by two in the afternoon, the suite's serene tranquility had been thoroughly replaced by the usual hurricane of a busy day.

the vast, modern art museum was a maze of soaring concrete walls, towering glass installations, and harsh studio strobes. flashes fired in blinding bursts, echoing through the space along with the frantic voices of french art directors, lighting technicians, and your team bustling about with clipboard. "hold that angle! shift the main light a little to the left! come on, everybody, we have five minutes before the press junket crew arrives!"

standing near the base of a pillar paces away, jay didn't blink. to the team in the room, he was the definition of intimidation and discipline. he stood in his sharp dark suit, shoulders squared, hands clasped in front of him, face carved out of stone. his eyes scanned the busy hall, assessing every crew member and wandering people stepping near.

no one would ever guess that a few hours ago, the same man was ever so gently feeding you your breakfast.

you sat perched on a prop chair under the blinding spotlights while a stylist fussed with the collar of your blazer. taking a small breath, your eyes looked through the crowded room until they found him in the shadows. and he felt your gaze right away, eyes locking onto yours through the sea of moving crew members.

you caught his eye, taking advantage of a moment where the team wasn't surrounding you. keeping your face calm and expression neutral so no one else would notice, your lips barely moved as you silently mouthed across the room, "i miss you."

his eyes softened for a second. he subtly shifted, turning his back slightly to hayoon who was walking nearby. checking his surroundings quickly, he looked right back at you. his jaw barely moved, but his lips formed the words, "ten minutes."

you tilted your head, "and then?"

a tiny muscle twitched in his jaw. he kept his hands clasped firmly, maintaining his stance for the room, but his gaze kept yours possessively. his lips moved slowly, "i'm taking you."

a dizzying wave of heat surged through your veins. your heart did a violent flip against your ribs, and a smile almost broke through your professional composure before you caught yourself and looked down at your lap, your cheeks burning.

"alright, final poses for the press preview!" the director shouted, stepping in front of the camera rig. you immediately sat up straight and delivered a flawless look straight into the lens.

afterwards, the ride back to the hotel had been a torturous exercise in restraint. trapped in the backseat of the car with hayoon reviewing tomorrow's schedule, you and jay couldn't exchange a single word. he sat in the front passenger seat this time, eyes glued to the side mirrors. but every time his eyes met yours in the rearview mirror, the tension thickened.

the second the doors to the suite clicked shut and hayoon's footsteps faded down the hallway, the heavy silence of the room snapped.

you barely had time to kick off your painful high heels before a pair of large hands settled firmly around your waist from behind. jay pulled your back flush against his chest, burying his face into your shoulder with a long exhale. the icy bodyguard vanished in a single heartbeat, replaced by the man who had been starving for you all afternoon. "finally," he pressed a warm kiss to the sweet spot right below your ear.

"ten minutes, huh?" you teased, turning in his arms to look up at him. you reached up, fingers going to the knot of his dark tie, loosening it with ease. "guess it had to be two hours instead."

"two hours too long," he groaned. he didn't waste another second, slipping his hands beneath your knees and lifting you off your feet. you wrapped your arms around his neck as he carried you the few steps over to the sofa, sitting down and pulling you right into his lap.

he didn't rush to anything. he just held you there, arms wrapped securely around your waist, tucking your head beneath his chin. "you were incredible today," he murmured, fingers stroking your back. "watching you under those lights... it took everything in me not to drag you out of there."

"i felt you watching me," you admitted, breathing in the comforting scent of cedar and clean cotton. "it was the only thing keeping me sane there."

he reluctantly let go of you, taking your hands in his. he rubbed his broad thumbs in slow circled over your palms and the sensitive skin between your fingers, working out all the tension you'd been holding throughout the day. a soft sigh escaped you, "jay... you don't have to pamper me like this."

"i want to, pretty," he replied raising your hand and pressing a kiss right to the middle of your palm. he stared at you for a moment, expression shining with a warmth that made your heart swell painfully tight. "i told you. when it's just the two of us, taking care of you is the only thing that matters."

the grounding comfort of that quiet evening didn't shield you from the relentless pace of your promotion schedule, though. just two days later, the setting shifted to a soundstage on the outskirts of the city for a live session broadcast.

when your manager stepped away to the green room to approve the broadcast's international distribution rights, jay seized the moment.

without breaking his performance, he caught your eyes and tilted his head towards a darkened area hidden behind the massive panels. you took a slow breath, casually stepping off the lighted stage to "adjust your monitor pack" while the floor director was distracted by a microphone issue.

before you could even react, jay pulled you into the narrow space. his hand settled at the small of your back as the other hand came up to cup your jaw. he leaned down, capturing your lips in a desperate kiss.

a gasp escaped your throat against his mouth. you threw your arms around his neck, fingers tangling in his hair, pulling him as close as physical space would allow. the adrenaline of being mere feet away from crew members and your entire team made the kiss feel more addicting.

jay groaned low in his throat, thumb caressing the skin behind your ear, deepening the kiss until both of your chests were heaving against each other in the dark.

"jay..." you breathed, pulling back a little, lips flushed and eyes heavy with heat. "hayoon... she's going to notice i'm gone."

"i know," he rasped, his forehead resting heavily against yours as his eyes searched yours in the dim shadows. "i just need thirty seconds with you. i couldn't handle seeing your there and watching you sing for another minute without touching you."

his hand slid down from your jaw, reaching into the inner pocket of his suit jacket. he pulled out a silver ring—a personal heirloom you had seen him wear on his finger whenever he was off-duty. taking your hand, he slipped it into your palm, closing your fingers tightly over it. "keep it with you," he raised your knuckles to his lips, giving them a small peck. "a reminder that no matter how many people are watching you... i'm the one right behind you."

your heart did a violent flip. you squeezed the cool ring in your hand, giving him a smile. "i'll keep it safe."

footsteps echoed over the flooring right outside, accompanied by the muffled voice of hayoon calling your name. and in a blink of an eye, jay stepped back, creating a distance and adjusting his earpiece as if he had just escorted you into the backstage alcove for a security sweep. "clear to re-enter the stage, yn," he said.

the heavy ring jay had slipped was kept in your bag throughout the trip, even until the thirteen-hour flight back to south korea.

but as the heavy iron security gate of the agency's private underground garage rolled shut behind the van, the coziness of paris vanished into the damp chill of seoul.

the second the engine cut out near the elevator bay, jay stepped out of the front passenger seat. as he scanned the dark parking area, his jaw was set in an unyielding line. "perimeter clear. team two, cover the stairwell access," he clipped out into his wrist mic.

hayoon stretched with a groan. "god, i hate these late night arrivals. come on, let's get you upstairs to the main office to sign off on the tour schedule, then we can finally send you home."

jay opened the heavy door, extending a hand to steady you as you stepped onto the slick concrete floor.

for a split second, as your fingers brushed his palm, your eyes met his. you searched his gaze for the man who kept you grounded the whole trip. he was there, but it was buried under layers of sharp alert. he gave your fingers one tiny squeeze before releasing them completely. "keep close to me, yn," he instructed as you started walking. "the cameras on the east side are under maintenance tonight."

hayoon walked a few steps ahead, tapping her phone as she pressed the button for the elevator. "sign-off should only take a few minutes upstairs, then—"

a sharp clatter echoed from the dark recess behind a massive pillar to your right.

before your brain could even process the sound, jay moved. "get back," he ordered, hand forcefully driving you behind his frame, shielding your entire body with his own.

out from the shadow of the pillar sprinted a figure in a black hoodie, face obscured by a medical mask. his eyes were wide, bloodshot, and completely unhinged. "yn!" he shrieked. in his right hand, reflecting the lights, was a utility knife. "you're back! you're finally back to me!"

he lunged directly for you, the blade raised high, ignoring the massive wall of a man standing in his path.

jay didn't retreat. driven by a combination of his years of training and a terrifying desperation to protect the woman he loved, he stepped directly into the attack line.

as the stalker slashed down, he grabbed his wrist with blinding speed, his hand locking around the man's arm like a vise. without missing a beat, jay drove his left elbow hard into the man's ribs with a sickening crack, instantly shattering the man's momentum. but before he could even scream in pain, jay executed a violent takedown. he twisted the man's arm back, forcing the blade to clatter, and slammed him onto the floor.

jay was on top of him in a heartbeat. he pinned the struggling, sobbing stalker to the floor with a knee driven into his shoulder blades. "don't move! don't you fucking move!" jay snarled, voice trembling with a rage you had never heard from him before.

"jay!" you gasped out, voice shaking as you took a timid step forward, tears pricking in your eyes. "jay, stop!"

your voice broke through the haze consuming him. he blinked rapidly, head snapping around to look at you. his eyes swept over your trembling body. "backup to the garage, now," he barked into his mic. "intruder subdued. call local police immediately."

and within seconds, the screech of tires and shouting security personnel flooded the basement, tearing the man away and cuffing him as police lights began flashing against the walls.

within thirty minutes, you were whisked up the elevator to the top floor. the moment the doors to han's office opened and you stepped inside, han nearly dropped his handset. "thank god," he managed to breath out. "yn, are you alright? police are handling the press. tell me—"

"i'm fine," you responded. "not a scratch."

he let out a shuddering sigh, turning his gaze toward the man standing behind you. "jay... jesus christ," he said. "if your instincts hadn't been that sharp, if you were even half a second slower... i don't even want to think about what would have happened. you saved her life tonight. i owe you everything."

jay offered a nod, eyes fixed on the windows. "i was doing my job," he replied, voice devoid of emotion. "it should never have come that close to begin with. the maintenance protocol was breached. i'm submitting a security failure report before morning."

han nodded, "we'll review security protocols tomorrow. right now, get her home safely. take the car through the private residential tunnel."

the drive to your apartment was conducted in a suffocating silence. jay didn't speak a single word. he drove this time, both hands locked onto the steering wheel, knuckles white against the dark leather. but there was an ice, impenetrable wall built up around him, so thick it felt like the air in the car had frozen over.

the moment the door of your apartment slicked shut, you expected the tension to break. you expected him to pull you into his arms, to hold you close.

instead, he froze. he didn't take off his suit jacker, nor did he unbutton his collar or loosen his tie. he stood near the door, posture as stiff and formal as a stranger's. "jay?" you called, turning around to face him. "are you... okay?"

"the residence is secure, yn-ssi," he said evenly, eyes fixed on the wall behind you, refusing to meet your gaze. a cold knot formed in your stomach. you took a step toward him, reaching out to touch his arm. "jay, stop calling me that. talk to me. you saved me tonight—"

the moment your fingers neared his sleeve, he took a step backward. "i am on duty until the morning team arrives," he continued. "i'll be outside in the hallway. please make sure the balcony doors remain locked, and get some rest."

"jay, look at me," you pleaded, voice breaking as tears started forming in your eyes. "please."

for a mere second, his eyes shifted toward yours. and what you saw in them cut deeper than any words could have. beneath the stoic mask, his eyes were shadowed with agony. in his mind, those moments in paris had dulled his sharp edges, making him hesitate down in that garage. he believed his personal love for you had almost cost you tour life.

he swallowed hard, "goodnight, yn-ssi."

and without waiting for your answer, he turned on his heel, stepped out into the hallway, and let the door click shut between you—putting a wall back between his heart and yours.

the days following that night in the garage, the secret paradise you and jay had built was gone. in its place stood a suffocating wall of pure professional protocol.

every interaction felt like a heartbreak. on set at television studios, jay performed his duties with robotic perfection. he checked your dressing room, stood guard near doors, and escorted you everywhere—yet he was more distant than he had been on his first day on the job.

he would avoid you in any way possible. he never made eye contact with you, and never even bothered to help you if any kind of physical touch was involved.

to anyone looking into han's office, the tall man standing at attention before the massive oak desk looked like the picture of composure.

but inside jay's head, it was a silent war. every time he closed his eyes, he saw that garage. he heard the metallic clatter of the blade, the manic eyes of the stalker, and he felt that sickening, split second freeze in his own heart.

i hesitated, the thought burned through his chest like hot acid. down in that dark corner, he hadn't reacted like a bodyguard but like a terrified man watching the center of his universe face destruction. and he couldn't afford to love you if it meant getting you killed.

"jay, be reasonable," han said, leaning back in his chair with a troubled sigh. he tapped his pen against a crisp set of documents. "you're the best head of security this agency has ever hired. you disarmed a threat in under five seconds. the press is calling it a miracle, the board is thrilled with you, and yn is completely unharmed. why on earth are you handing me a reassignment request?"

"my performance in the garage was compromised, sir," jay stated. "i allowed a threat to enter the primary perimeter before initiating defensive maneuvers. my emotional assessment of the client's safety is no longer objective."

han frowned, leaning forward as his eyes narrowed. "emotional assessment— jay, you've been working too many shifts. you're exhausted. take two days off. let the others handle tomorrow—"

"no, sir," jay interrupted, voice carrying a quiet, desperate authority than made han pause. "a temporary leave will not rectify the vulnerability. i'm formally requesting a full transfer. i have already drafted a recommendation for sector seven. their senior operative, seojun, is highly decorated and entirely objective."

han stared at him for a long moment before letting out a frustrated breath and picking up his pen. "if i sign off on this, there's no coming back, jay. you'll be reassigned to a corporate asset in singapore by the end of the week. you won't be on her detail ever again.

good, jay thought, even as a jagged blade twisted violently in his gut. she'll be alive.

"understood, sir," jay replied with a nod. "please sign the transfer authorization."

and it was well past midnight when you heard the news yourself. you walked down the hallway after rehearsal, holding your phone to check for any updates. not too far away, han was stepping out of the side stairwell, a thick folder tucked under his arm. he was on his phone, voice carrying clearly down the empty corridor.

"i know it's sudden," he said. "jay hand-delivered the transfer papers this afternoon. he's stepping down as her primary guard... sector seven is sending operative seojun to take over."

you froze in your tracks. "look, i tried to talk him out of it," han continued. "he won't budge. says his judgment is compromised. he's getting reassigned to singapore by the end of the week—"

the rest of his words faded farther, but the silence he left behind felt like a physical blow to your chest.

jay was erasing himself from your life.

your blood turned to fire. the sadness that had been weighing down your heart for the past few days burned away, now switched by a wave of fury. he was making this choice for you. he was deciding that his love was a weakness, that your connection was a flaw to be excised, and he was planning to go away without even giving you the dignity of a goodbye.

turning on your heel, you marched straight back toward the practice rooms. you didn't need to ask where he was. you knew him. you knew that while the secondary guards covered outside, jay would be doing his final inspections inside.

as you rounded the corner toward the main studio at the end of the hall, you saw the thin strip of yellow light. you reached for the handle and pushed the door open.

there, jay stood near the sound system, checking the area with a tablet in hand. the second the heavy doors swung shut behind you, his shoulders went rigid. he didn't turn around right away. he took a measured breath, closing his tablet before turning to face you. "yn-ssi," he called. "it's late. rehearsals ended an hour ago. you should be heading back."

"singapore, jay? really?" you asked, voice ringing sharp through the room.

a small hitch caught in his breath, but his face remained carved out of marble. "i don't know what you mean—"

"don't lie to me!" you snapped, taking two fast steps toward him. "i just heard mr. han on the phone. hand delivered transfer papers? operative seojun taking over? you leaving for singapore by the end of the week?"

jay's jaw tightened, eyes fixing on a point over your left shoulder, stubbornly refusing to look directly into your eyes. "my assessment is correct," he admitted. "operative seojun is highly qualified. his protocols are superior, and he has no personal history that could interfere with his work."

"personal history—" you let out a harsh laugh in disbelief, tears of frustration streaming out. "is that what paris was to you? fucking personal history? a flaw in your security metrics?"

"it was a mistake," he clipped out. "my primary duty is to keep you breathing. down in that garage, i hesitated. i let my feelings cloud my tactical response. if i am distracted because i am thinking about how to hold you, how to protect my own heart... i'm a liability to your life."

"you're a coward!" you shouted. jay flinched, chest rising and falling in ragged breaths. "call me whatever you want, yn-ssi. but by weekend, my job ends. you'll be safe."

"i won't be safe, god damn it, jay!" you cried out, taking another step forward, closing the distance he desperately tried to maintain.

with trembling fingers, you held up your left hand, where his heavy silver ring sat gleaming under the lights. "what about this, jay?" your voice broke. "you slipped this ring into my hands and told me it was a reminder that you'd be right behind me at all times. was that a lie? was it just another shitty security protocol?"

his eyes snapped down to the ring, his breath locking in his throat. the sight of his band resting against your soft skin hit him like a blow, threatening to shatter every wall he had built.

"i don't want a perfect shield, jay! i want you!" your tears spilled over your eyelashes, fast down your cheeks. "do you have any idea how terrifying it is to stand on those stages? to face thousands of screaming people, never knowing who is safe and who wants to hurt me?"

jay's breath hitched, eyes flickering to meet yours, the mask beginning to fracture under the weight of your raw vulnerability.

"the one and only reason i can stand under those lights, the only reason i can sing without shaking, is because i know you're standing there," you whispered, hands trembling. "knowing you love me isn't a distraction, jay. it's the only thing that gives me the courage to survive this life."

you looked up at him, "so if you walk away now... if you board that plane to singapore... you aren't saving my life. you're breaking it."

the heavy silence that followed your words stretched across the empty studio. for a long second, jay couldn't move. he stood completely frozen, breath deepening each passing second, eyes staring into yours as the weight of your tears crashed over him.

suddenly, a noise escaped his throat—a sound raw with days of suppressed torment, guilt, and unrelenting love.

before you could draw another breath, jay closed the distance between you in a heartbeat. his hands cupped the sides of your face, fingers tangling slightly into your hair as he yanked you against him, knocking the air right out of your lungs. he bent his head down, pressing his forehead hard against yours, whole body trembling against yours like a structure on the verge of collapse. "god, yn..." he rasped. "don't say that... please, don't say that to me."

"it's the truth," you sobbed, hands coming up to clutch tightly at the fabric of his shirt, anchoring yourself to his chest. "it's the truth, jay."

"i was terrified," he whispered, his hot breath fanning across your flushed skin, eyes wide and shining with unshed tears as he looked down at you. "when i saw that blade... when i realized how close he came to taking you away from me... my heart stopped. i felt weak. i felt like every second i spent loving you made me slow, made me reckless."

his thumb slid up to gently wipe the tears from your cheekbones. "i thought if i walked away, if i put someone colder between you and the world, you'd be safe," he murmured. "i was ready to burn my own life to ashes if it kept you breathing. but i can't... god, help me, i can't survive watching another man stand in place."

"then don't let him," you whispered fiercely, reaching up to hold his jaw. "stay with me. fight for me. love me."

jay closed his eyes, leaning into your touch as if your hand was the only thing keeping him grounded in the dark. a deep sigh wracked his broad shoulders, washing away the cold person he had forced himself to be, leaving only the man who belonged to you.

he slid his arms down, wrapping them tightly around your waist and pulling you flush against his chest, placing his head into the crook of your neck. "i'm tearing up the transfer," he said against your skin, pressing a deep peck to the side of your neck that made your heart flip.

"no seojun. no singapore. nothing that steps between us."

one year later.

the roar of thousands of fans was still ringing in your ears, a deafening ocean of cheers that echoed off the stadium after the final confetti cannon had fired.

outside the exit, the rainy seoul night was a sea of blinding camera flashes and shouting press. it was the encore of your world tour, and the world saw an idol at the peak of her career.

right at your shoulder stood jay. dressed in that black suit of his, shoulders squared and sharp eyes scanning the crowd, he looked impenetrable. "keep moving forward," he rumbled smoothly as he cut a path through the media surge, guiding you toward the van.

later on when the door of your apartment swung shut, the silence of your private sanctuary washed over you like a warm blanket, swallowing the faint echoes of the screams you had heard.

the posture jay had maintained all evening finally softened. he unbuttoned his suit jacket, shedding the heavy fabric and tossing it over the back of an armchair. he reached up, pulling his tie loose with a slow tug, unfastening the two top buttons of his shirt to reveal the collarbones beneath. he rolled up his sleeves up his forearms, kicking off his shoes before turning to look at you.

"come here," he muttered.

without a moment's hesitation, you closed the distance, stepping straight into his frame. his arms locked around your waist, sweeping you off your feet. you let out a soft laugh, burying your face in the familiar scent of him. he carried you across the room to the sofa, sinking into the soft cushions and pulling you right into his lap.

he bent his head down, burying his face into your hair and letting out an exhale that seemed to drain the last drops of tension from his massive frame.

"you know," you started, resting your chin against his shoulder, "for a second out there by the barricades, i thought you were actually going to snap that reporter in half. you were giving him the scariest death stare ever."

a rumble of amusement vibrated in his chest. he pulled back to look at you, a crooked smirk tugging at his lips. "he shoved a giant microphone right in your face," he recalled with a glint of mischief in his eyes. "he was way too close. honestly, you should be thanking me for being in my best behavior."

"oh yeah, suuuper great of you," you giggled, reaching up to trace the sharp line of his jaw, feeling the light rasp of a stubble against your fingertips. "pretty sure mr. han almost had a heart attack when you blocked the camera with your hand out of nowhere."

"he's fine. he'll live," he replied with a shrug, leaning into your hand and letting his eyes flutter shut to enjoy your touch. "besides i've got my priorities straight."

"is that so?" you smiled, thumb lightly tracing his lower lip. "and what are those?"

he leaned in, pressing a kiss to your forehead, then to the tip of your nose, before finally brushing his lips against yours in a sweet kiss that felt like pure relief. "keep you safe," he mumbles against your lips. "love you unconditionally. and make sure you know you're stuck with me forever."

"sounds like a lifetime sentence, big guy," you whispered back, wrapping your arms around his neck.

"yeah, well... you're not getting rid of me now."

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