hales

"In my life Oh, why do I give valuable time To people who don't care if I live or die?" ☆ 18 ☆

[str4wberry-str33t-deactivated20]

quick reminder that it’s ok to say that you love reading and that reading is your passion without reading 30+ books in a year. if you connect with books and love the power of the written word, you’re bookish. you don’t need to justify your love of reading.

[daily-spooky]

[reid-enthusiast]

I Love You

Compared to some of the things the members of his team liked to do when they had a couple days or so off- party, girls, men, drink, Spencer liked something much tamer; movie nights. 

Specifically, movie nights with her. 

He spent a lot of time away from her, so much more than he really likes but she’s insisted that it’s okay because she understands the degree of commitment his job takes, but whenever he’s home, they’re both curled in on each other with a movie list at the ready for them to pick from.  

She loves to watch romcoms. 

He loves what she loves. 

Tonight was one of those nights. The team had just gotten back from a particularly tough case, a man going around raping woman and the disemboweling them, and all he wanted to do was crawl into her arms and forget everything outside the two of them existed.  

When he stepped into their shared apartment and kicked off his shoes, his eyes were immediately scanning the area, looking for her. His eyes latched onto where he saw her. She was sitting on the couch, her back to him, knees bunched up to her chest, book placed over said knees, a blanket draped over her legs as she was humming softly to herself.  

“Angel,” His voice was strained, and it cracked slightly on his name for her. Instantly as soon as the first syllable was out of his mouth her head was whipping around and a huge smile spread across her face. She scrambled off the couch, tripping slightly over her blanket in her haste to get to him.  

As soon as she was close enough she was launching herself at him, and Spencer, fully expecting it wrapped his arms around her waist, bringing her feet slightly off the floor so he could burry his face in her neck without hurting his back. He took in a deep breath, took in a lung full of her scent, a scent that covered every inch of his clothes, every inch of his life.  

Despite the fact that he hates being gone for so long he loves coming home to her. It makes everything bothering go away. It made the world seem okay again. She made the world seem a little bit brighter than it was. She was his world. 

She pulled back a little and so did he, but not before taking in one more deep breath of her scent before lowering her slowly back down to the floor. Her smile was still evident but it had softened sligthly, it was more tender than it was excited. Her arms dropped from his neck where she’d been previously clinging to, to rest against his chest so she could cup his cheeks, her eyes raking over his features, committing every single one to memory.  

“Spencer,” She whispered softly, her voice filled with tenderness and longing. He leaned down in response and gently pressed his lips to hers.  

Considering all he knew about the human mouth and the germs passed through kissing he should be disgusted by it, but he’s come to find he could never be disgusted by anything she did, or anything involving her. He was so in love with her sometimes he felt like he couldn’t breathe when she wasn’t near him. It was scary. 

Scary in the sense of he’s never felt this all-consuming type of love before. It was foreign to him, and he didn’t know exactly what to do with it. On one hand he was hesitant to tell her because he was terrified of losing her, not that she would leave him but more so that someone having a connection to an unsub they’d put away would find her and take him from her, but on the other hand he wanted to scream it. Scream it in their tiny little apartment so she could know how profound it felt to love her. Spencer wanted her to know that. He needed her to know that.  

He also knew that she loved him. He could see it when she looked at him with complete division. That scared him too at first. To have someone be so completely and utterly in love with you was scary, but not as scary as feeling the same way about them. He knew she hadn’t said anything out of respect to him. When they’d first gotten together, he’d voiced his opinions about wanting to take things slow. They’d been dating for about seven months now; they’ve been living together for about a month out of those seven. They hadn’t kissed till a month and a half into those seven. He hadn’t done a lot of things until later in their relationship. They have yet to get...intimate. He’s still mustering up his courage on that one and thinks that if he can’t tell her he loves her then he has no right to go to bed with her.  

At least in that sense.  

Spencer was ready to tell her though. He’s been thinking on it for a while, the pros and the cons. The pros out weighed the cons by thousands and he’d been trying to find the right time to tell her. When he got home and saw her run up to him like she did he knew now was the right time. He knew he wouldn’t be able to wait any longer. 

He pulled back from their gentle kiss, his lips aching with the need to be put against hers again. He shoveled it down and opened his mouth to speak, but before he could she placed a finger against his lips, gently shutting him up. 

“I can see it in your eyes. I know what you’re going to say, and I just want to know that you dont have to. Not if you’re not one hundred percent certain.” She pushed back the long strands of his hair behind his ears and tilted her head to the side, her smile getting smaller slightly. Not because she was unhappy but because she understood what he was feeling, they’d talked about it before and he’d voiced his concerns to her regarding the big “L” word and everything that comes with it. She told him that she had been feeling the same way. Telling someone you love them is a big commitment, and she didn’t want to be one of those couples that just throw the word around so much it lost its meaning and importance.  

“I want to say it,” He whispered to her, and he took her hands away from his cheeks and pressed gentle kisses to the pads of her fingers.  

“I need to say it,” He took in a deep breath and forged ahead, shoving down any anxiety he was feeling. “I need you to know how...how absolutely in love with you I am, because that's what this is. That’s what this feeling is. I’ve known I’ve loved you for...well I think some part of me has always been in love with you,” He gave her a soft smile and trailed the tip of his fingers over her cheeks, his touch feather light and slightly ticklish. 

She leaned forward and placed her forehead against his chest, hiding the tears that filled my eyes in reaction to his words.  

“You are to freaking sweet for your own good, you know that?” she spoke softly, her voice slightly hoarse. She felt Spencer’s hands move to his upper arms and he pulled her towards the couch. He sat down and she immediately scrambled to sit on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. 

They stayed like that for a while. Just hugging each other on the couch, but after a while she pulled back and cupped his cheeks, her head tilted to the side as she stared at him, her eyes roaming over his face, taking in every detail she possibly could and committing it to memory. 

“I love you too,” she finally told him, and the smile that spread across his face was blinding. She sucked in a sharp breath and placed a kiss to his forehead, whispering the words again, then she kissed his cheek and whispered the words again. She kissed all over his face, whispering ‘I love yous’ after each kiss. Finally, she had one last place to kiss, his lips. She stared into his eyes, her gaze completely unwavering as she leaned her forehead against his and whispered the words again. 

“I love you, Spencer Reid. Always have, always will,” She finally pressed her lips against his and savored the feeling. His lips were always soft, never chapped, and he kissed with his whole heart. His arms moved around her waist and pulled her closer to him, reveling in the feeling of her body against his.  

She leaned back, breaking the kiss, and ran her fingers through his hair. Spencer tipped his head back and let out a soft sigh at the feeling. She stared down at him, her heart beating wildly in her chest and her mind raging with thoughts she had no idea what to do with. Her hands stilled; fingers still tangled in his hair. He tipped his head up slightly and opened his eyes a smidge. 

“What’s wrong?” He murmured, taking in the expression on her face. His breathing hitched and he sat up straight, a pang going through his heart and worrying thoughts running through his head.  

She shook her head and placed a kiss to his forehead. “Stop over thinking, I just...” She laughed softly to herself and shook her head in slight disbelief.  

“I’m just trying to convince myself this is real, you know? Cause honestly when you told me you loved me, I swear I thought I was dreaming,” Spencer moved his hands from her waist to cup her cheeks, running the pads of his thumbs under her eyes, right over her cheek bones.  

“I feel like that all the time,” He confessed to her, the smile he gave her was one of understanding and when he leaned back again, he took her with him. She rested her cheek against his shoulder and took a deep breath, inhaling his scent just like he’d done to her when he’d first gotten home. 

“So, what movie do you want to watch tonight?” He asked her softly, his fingers running through her hair. 

“500 days of summer,” she murmured, and he chuckled in response. I reached for the remote and turned on the movie. 

 Just before it started, he whispered softly to her, “I love you.” and kissed her cheek as the movie began playing. 

[mentalbaddie]

this

[inactive-whoisspence]

of course i don't have any favorites in the bau i love them all equally....

[thebirthdaysparty-deactivated20]

thoughts are definitely being thought right now

[inactive-whoisspence]

so specific and for what

[reid-enthusiast]

Compliments

“Hey Spence,” His ears latched onto the side of her voice, and his eyes tracked her position through the corner of his eye. She was sitting forward, her chin placed in the palm of her hand and her eyes were locked on him as he worked. He tried not to shift under the scrutiny of her gaze and made a small noise of acknowledgment.

“You’re really pretty,” She spoke softly, her tone was slightly breathless and when his eyes snapped up to hers at the compliment, his eyes blown wide and his mouth slightly agape in shock, he’d made the observation that she seemed breathless because...well because of him.

His cheeks were tinged pink, and she couldn’t help but take great joy in that. She’d gotten him flustered. The Spencer Reid was flustered. By a very small and innocent compliment, nonetheless.

“Flustered, Spencer?” She teased as her lips spread into a wide mischievous grin.

“No- I- I'm not-” His stuttering only made him flush more and her grin widen.

“Why’re you flustered Spence? I was just a compliment,” She crossed her ankles under her desk and tilted her head to the side, her question one of teasing as well as genuine curiosity.

He gave her a meek shrug and glanced down at the files he’d been working on before looking back up at her. “People don’t...people don’t usually give me compliments I guess,”

That sobered her up slightly. Her brows furrowed together in confusion and her spine straightened as she sat up straighter.

“No compliments?”

He pressed his lips into a straight line, showing off his dimples and showing off what she’s labeled as his signature Spencer face, and shrugged again. Her heart cracked a little in her chest at the confession. Sometimes it’s easy to forget what he went through as a kid in high school, because that’s what he’d been. A kid. She could hardly fathom the fact that he wasn’t appreciated, not for his brain or for the fact that he was just adorable.

“Well, that’s changing,” She huffed, her face changing from one of confusion to one of determination, but his face was the one to switch to confusion.

“What do you mean?” His brows were furrowed together, and he was leaning back in his chair, his fingers fiddling with his pen.

“I mean you’re going to be getting more compliments from now on,” She shrugged nonchalantly and leaned back into her chair as well, intertwining her fingers over her stomach and sending him a small smile.

“You should know you’re appreciated Spence,” She stated firmly, her tone one that left no room for debate. He felt his heart stutter in his chest, he had so much he wanted to say but words seemed to evade him, so he just gave her a soft smile, hoping she could see the affection he held towards her through his gaze.

Compliment him she did. Every chance he got she complimented him, not on work stuff because he got enough of those types of compliments but things about his looks, his personalities, because he didn’t seem to understand how amazing he is, even outside of his job.

“Spencer, you look really nice today, I like your new tie.” She patted his shoulder as she sat down next to him on the BAU jet, waiting for everyone else to board so they could leave for another case. He leaned his head back against the seat and turned to look at her. His eyes raked over her face, taking in her features.

“Thank you,” His tone was soft, so soft it was almost a whisper and as he looked over her face, his heart rate picked up expectedly with the reaction he knew he was going to get out of her. Two words was all it took for her face to break out into the largest smile he’d ever seen on a person. She looked so elated that he couldn’t help but smile back at her, not as large or as enthralled but it was a smile, nonetheless. She reached her hand out and took his in her palm. He fought the urge to rub his thumb against the back of her hand and instead chose to focus on how soft they were.

He knew from having the desk across from hers she was constantly putting on lotion, but now he knew what that commitment felt like in his hand.

“I don’t want you to think that I constantly complimented you to make you purposefully feel uncomfortable because that would be the farthest thing from the truth,” He opened his mouth the explain to her that that’s not what he was thinking when she held up her hand, sending him a pointed look to be quite for a moment and let her speak. He immediately sealed his lips shut and gave her a sheepish smile.

“I kept, and will keep, complimenting you because I want you to understand two things. One, that you are more than this job. You should know you are appreciated in every aspect of life, not just everything work related. Two, you are so amazing and the fact that you aren’t being told is criminal. And I’m, again, not talking about work amazing. You get told every day you’re astonishing at what you do, those compliments are easy for you to take. Nah, I’m talking about you, Spence. You are just so- so astounding. I am constantly in awe of you. The things you do when you think no one is looking, the things you notice about other people, about me. You are constantly making sure I’m appreciated and well taken care of, well now it’s my turn.” She took in a deep breath of air and leaned forward to press a kiss to his cheek.

“You are so astounding, shocking, staggering, any other words that are probably floating up in your noggin right now to describe someone as amazing as you. That is what you are. That’s who you are. Don’t you ever forget it,” She leaned back in her seat and smiled at everyone as they began filling up into the jet. As he watched her smile at the team he felt his heart grow. Like in the Grinch, when it showed his heart growing in size as he accepted the love, he was receiving from the Whos in Whoville.

That’s what it felt like his heart was doing. And it was then that he knew, knew with his whole heart, he was fucked. So utterly fucked. He was falling, and like anything Spencer did he did it 100%. He was 100% falling in love with her.

I didn't like what I posted before and this has been brewing in my brain for the past couple of days so I thought why not :)

[reid-enthusiast]

What She Deserves  

Spencer is, without a doubt, one of the smartest people he knows of. This isn’t him being cocky or anything, it’s just plain fact. He more than likely knows the answer to anything that you’re thinking- but he cannot for the life of him figure out why she chooses men that treat her with so much less respect than she deserves. And it’s not like they were amazing to her at the beginning and all of a sudden are just huge pieces of shits, no, you can tell from first glance the guys she dates are shady. 

They smoke, they drink, they have small felonies under their belt, and yet she still goes back. He’s tried figuring it out, he’s gone through every single possible scenario in his head that would push her towards choosing those type of men but, for once, he can’t think of anything.

Nothing.

Nada.

Zilch. 

It bothers him.  

It angers him. 

If he could figure out why she goes for them, he could help her. He could help her find someone that would treat her right. That will get her flowers for no other reason than appreciation, not because they messed up and are apologizing, that’ll take her out to her favorite restaurant because she’s been stressed lately and he feels she could do with a small pick me up, who will call her just to hear her voice- because in Spencer’s opinion, it was melodious, who will give into her physical needs as well- because that’s her love language, she loves being held, she loves kisses, whether that be on the cheek or anywhere else. Who will know she loves just talking about the people she cares about because she’s so genuinely happy for them she’s overwhelmed, that she doesn’t really like white chocolate or dark chocolate, but give her anything with peanut butter and chocolate and she’ll forever be thankful for you, that she struggles with panic attacks and when those happen she just needs a firm hug, someone to rub her back, run their fingers through her hair because physical touch calms her.  

Never though. In all the stories Spencer’s heard about the men in her life, none of them care enough to find those things out. His confusion has gotten to the point where he’s felt the need to ask Gideon about it, because if anyone knew, he would. So, when Spencer finally mustered up the courage to ask him, Gideon answered with something that should have been obvious.  

We accept the love we think we deserve.” 

It had been right in front of his face. How could he not have seen it? 

He knows why, because he cannot fathom that she believes she is worth that little. He cannot wrap his brain around the fact that she thinks she shouldn’t get the absolute best from not just a guy, but anyone she meets. She is such a genuine person. Undoubtably she was the most amazing person he’d ever known. She remembers every little inconspicuous thing someone tells her, if you tell her, you love chocolate covered strawberries, she’d getting you some on your birthday or just because, if you tell her what your favorite brand of pens are she’s buying you a pack. She’s just that type of person and he could only imagine what it's like not...not having someone like that for you. She’s supposed to. Every guy she gets with she’s supposed to have that, but she never does. Ever. 

And he’s sick and tired of it.  

He knows from that point on, he’s going to be that person to her. He will be the one to remember the little things about her. Every little thing.  

He vows, from this moment on she will know how loved she is. She will know that she has people that care about her and want the absolute best for her because that’s exactly what she deserves. The best. 

He will be the best. 

[angellsell]

My Roman Empire is the platonic soulmate trope in Criminal Minds

[hotchnerbau]

[in-another-april]

it is absolutely EVIL that both glasses spencer and boyband spencer were only around for a couple of episodes

like LOOK AT HIM ‼️ we deserved at least half a season with these looks, we were ROBBED

[lostingubler]

the vibe i bring to the function

[reid-enthusiast]

Overwhelmed

Before he met her his life was monotonous. Everything was the same, day in and day out, which let’s be clear about he had absolutely nothing against. He likes order, he likes routines as well, but let’s also get this clear. Now that he knows what it’s like to have her in his life, have her around him, how her arms feel wrapped around him in a hug, how it feels to just listen to her ramble on about anything and everything that’s on his mind? He will never go back. Ever. 

He didn’t know how to describe what he’d been feeling towards her at first. He was clueless when it came to feelings and this time was no different. He was nervous about asking anyone about it, he didn’t want to get made fun of, or be told that she would never go for him. He knew that. He knew that people like her didn’t go for people like him. He’s been told that since he was a preteen in high school, but that didn’t stop his feelings. It didn’t stop him from looking for her in every room he walked into, it didn’t stop his thoughts from revolving around her in a constant circle, it didn’t stop anything he felt towards her.  

It had been a normal day. He’d woken up, done his usual routine of getting ready and then headed to the train station so he could get to the BAU. And just like normal when he walked into the bullpen his eyes snapped to where her desk was, where she was hunched over, a steaming cup of tea- she detested coffee he’d come to learn- placed by her hunched frame. He could tell she was stressed about something, she only ever looked like this when something was bothering her. That was another thing he’d come to notice. Her body language, it was weird, he was a profiler, of course he notices these things but with her...with her it felt different. It felt like every time he learned something new about her, he was packing that information away into a very safe cubby.  

A cubby he would revisit whenever he could, it held all their memories together, when they first met, when his feelings first started showing up, when he’d finally been able to place the specific scent that belonged to her- eucalyptus and a hint of cherry from her lip gloss-, when he’d figured out that when she hummed to herself at times she was humming The Smiths, how elated she’d been when he’d gotten her Louder Than Bombs on vinyl for her birthday, how she’d gave him a sweet kiss on his cheek and then apologized for getting her lipstick on him, he’d told her that it was okay then left to use the restroom- he didn’t actually have to go, he just wanted to commit the sight of her lip print etched onto his cheek into his brain. It was his favorite cubby. He’d never forgotten things he’d seen, and he never would. Especially not with her. 

Once he’d sat down at his desk it’d taken her maybe fifteen minutes before walking over to him, her cup of tea in hand and a huge smile spread across her pretty face. He didn’t really like the word pretty, it felt too mundane when describing someone, but with her- with her it seemed to be one of the only words that fit. She was pretty. Pretty and beautiful, and stunning, and breathtaking, and euphoric, and every word his brain could come up with to describe a woman as magnificent as her. 

She’d been leaning against his desk when it hit him. As he took in her face, her beautiful blonde hair, the way it framed her face, the way her lips glinted under the lights thanks to her lip gloss, the smell of her wafting into his nose, the way she held herself- always confident, the way she smiled at him, a smile she never gave to anyone besides himself.  

“Overwhelmed,” He’d whispered. He didn’t mean to say it out loud but it slipped past his lips before he could fully process the emotions coursing through him. She’d paused mid-sentence, her head tilted adorably to the side and her brows furrowed in slight confusion.  

“What was that Spence?” He swallowed thicky at her question and blinked up at her.  

“I’m overwhelmed,” He repeated. Her look turned more confused, and she stood up straighter, her confused gaze turning a bit worried. “Overwhelmed? By what? Is everything okay?” 

“By you,” He whispered, forging on ahead, not allowing himself time to process what he was telling her and the consequences that will follow. “I look at you and I’m...I’m overwhelmed you exist.” 

That knocked the breath right out of her. She’d had people tell her sweet things before, that she was pretty, that she was smart, that she was kind and caring...but no one had ever told her that they were overwhelmed by her existence. Her mind was reeling, trying to figure out adequate words that would explain to him how much his words meant to her, and how much she appreciates him. Her mouth floundered open and closed and just as something was starting to sprout in her head JJ walked towards them and told them and told them they were needed for a debriefing.  

Time passed, they solved another case, they came back to Quantico, and she still hadn’t found time to say anything to him. She hated it. She wanted to tell him how she felt, how he made her feel. She had so many things she wanted to say but couldn’t find the time, or the words honestly.  

He felt terrible. The whole time they were on their most recent case, half of his mind was on the case itself while the other was focused on how she didn’t say anything. Not a single word. She just gaped at him, her eyes wide and those cherry lip gloss covered lips wide and set into a small ‘o’. God he’d wanted to hit himself. Why did he say anything at all? Why couldn’t he have just kept his big mouth shut? The one time he decided to open his mouth, to share whatever was going through his brain and it backfired. It backfired hard.  

He banished those thoughts from his head and decided instead to focus on the left over case files he still had left. He eyed the stack he still had left to sift through before reaching towards the one on top when something caught his eye. He leaned forward, and gently took the paper into his hands, immediately recognizing the handwriting. A small, hesitant smile pulled at his lips, and he opened the small note with care, making sure not to crinkle the paper. His eyes latched onto that handwriting. Handwriting he’s seen thousands of times before, when they would pass notes about a case, or when he would receive a birthday card from her. His eyes latched onto the letters wrote in her soft and delicate handwriting. She didn’t write anything fancy, simple words but those words single handedly made his entire year.  

Spencer, 

When I look at you, I’m overwhelmed you exist too :) 

Coffee? 

When he looked up from his desk she was holding a cup of coffee for him, specifically made to his tastes, tastes that she had imprinted into her mind.  

“Hi,” she whispered, her voice a little breathless from the look in his eyes, the devotion. It staggered her. It shook her to her very core, but she was enthralled by it. By him. 

“Hi,” He whispered back, his mind already tucking this moment into his favorite cubby, tucked into the back corner of his mind.