Youâre back.. || (S.R)
The second part of âYouâll be back, right?â â Part One!
pairing(s): Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader
summary: he said heâd be back for you, you waited.. he hadnât shown.. whatâll happen?
warning(s): (MDNI 18+) stress, nausea, self-degradation, skin picking, pet-names, fingering, swearing !! (i believe thatâs all..)
word count: 1,8k
âHe had gotten up from the mattress, it springing up due to the loss of his weight. Once he reached the handle of the door you yelled out to him, "You'll be back, right?" your voice drowsy, dripping with tiredness.
He looked back for a moment, smiling softly, "Right."â
â
The room was pale, normal for a hotel room. It was dark, gloomy, very much on the brink of unsettling. You hadnât quite realized this before.. not really minding the room, itâs average, right? Youâve been on this job to be able to say youâve been in enough hotel rooms than the average person does in a lifetime, but this room.. itâs different. A pit starts to form in your stomach, a feeling of utter emptiness.
Well.. now itâs different. The obvious lack of your previous partner is enough to make you weak, not that you werenât already.. but your mental state is becoming ever so fragile by the second. He hadnât returned. He said heâd be âright backâ and truly, an hour and a half doesnât seem to be âright backâ to me.
Reid had always been a man of his word.. in fact, he had promised you he hadnât wanted to leave, yet the minute he did and got the chance to be stripped of your company, he took it. The pit in your stomach grows. Didnât he want you as a partner? Didnât he want what you wanted? Did he lie? Why does he always make you feel like this, one second he likes you, the next heâs gone without a word.
Tears begin to form in the creases of my eyes. Am I truly that naive? So naive I let the man Iâd fallen hopelessly for three years ago take my virginity? I had to constantly remind myself not to let myself go, and here I am.. alone in a hotel room miles away from home, hopelessly trying to grip onto a sliver of hope that heâll return any second.
The sad part is I actually thought heâd be back, I trusted him with my feelings, with my body. My stomach turns, a single tear falling from my eye and burning my skin, like a fire igniting within me⌠anger? No, not at all anger, but pure regret. I told myself Iâd handle myself around guys, especially that one, and I hadnât. I left myself down. Another tear falls from my glassy eye.
I want to reverse what happened, go back and tell myself that this had to have been another thing for Reid to have against you, another way for him to turn against you, another way to control your feelings in a way that was more than belittling.
I claw at my skin, picking at it, dangerously close to drawing blood, but I donât care. My stress takes control, my body shaking, my skin an absolute wreck. I need an out, I need to be out. I want to be home.
I feel nauseous.
Iâm rocking myself from side to side, a mechanism Iâve had since I was a child. Biting my lip, picking at the skin that surrounds my nails. I feel like a child. Iâm so childish. Couldnât I have denied him? Why do I let him into my heart when all he does is break mine? The pit in my stomach drops, I need to puke.
I crawl out of bed, and run to the bathroom, jerking myself forward, feeling my stomach turn. I hate loving Spencer Reid. Itâs a mistake, one I shouldnât have made, one I poorly made. I need to take it back, I need to leave the team, I need to be home, why did I drink so much?
As I sit there, direly close to puking everywhere, I hear the doorknob rattle, once the person on the other end had realized the door was locked, a knock came seconds later. I pulled myself off of the floor, Iâm dizzy. Mental note to self: take medication for this headache.
When I open the door, unaware that it wouldâve been smarter to look through the peephole before, it opens to a panting Reid, a concerned look on his face, a sigh of relief leaving his mouth when he saw my face.
He reached his arms out, springing forward to hug me, and he wonât even shake hands with people? His arms on me feel all too familiar, Iâm nauseous. I want to push him away, but I need him here, Iâm a puddle of nothing without him.
Iâm so pathetic, itâs depressing.
I sniffle, having only cried minutes earlier. âWhere were you?â I said quietly, almost a whisper. He frowned, keeping his hands steady on my waist âPretty GirlâŚâ he shook his head at what seemed to be himself, âIâm so sorry. I went to grab clothes for tomorrow so I would be able to stay with you tonight, I didnât want to leave you alone..â he said, voice cracking.
âI didnât mean it, I had searched my go bag and couldnât find anything, I stressed, and that stress led to me being so tired I fell asleep, i didnât want to leave you, love.. please understand.â You sniffle again, another tear falling from your eye, is he lying? If so, itâs got to be the worst lie he couldâve come up with.
He lifted one of his hands to your face, his thumb wiping away your tears, your cheek felt hot, the same fire from earlier getting hotter. âI waited for you.. you promised youâd be back..â you looked down, not needing to see him right now, it didnât help your case.
âAngel..â his hand still soft on your face, his touch seemingly healing all thatâs wrong. âyouâve got to believe me, I wouldnât leave you like that, ever. You shouldâve came and woke me up.â He shook his head again, âI shouldnât have even been sleeping, princess.. trust me when I say I didnât mean this even a little bit.â
You had to tell him you were a virgin, but first you needed to not be standing up, you were already dizzy, and this is the type of conversation youâd sit for. You waddle to your bed slowly, him following suit, once sat he was directly next to you, sitting against the headboard, hand slung around your waist, thumb rubbing circles into your plush skin.
âReidâŚâ your voice cracked, âI need to tell you something.â He nodded, âMhm?â. The pit in your stomach returns again, eating you from the inside out. âIâm.. a.. well I was.. a-â a tear falls down my cheek âvirgin.â Heâd completely had moved to face you, hand moving to your face to wipe your tears.
âAngel,â he spoke, quieting you when youâd almost interrupted him, âwhy didnât you tell me? I.. was I? Too much..?â You giggled foolishly, tears still leaving your eyes, the faint taste of salt now lingering on your lips. âNo, not too much.. just.. figured you- should know.â
He smiled softly, moving both of his hands to the side of your face, âCan I kiss you?â He asked, you nodded. âDo we have to go through this again? Iâd prefer it if you used your words, Angel.â All that could leave your mouth was a faint âyes,â a whisper, silent consent for him to make his next move.
His mouth was on yours in an instant, his tongue entering your mouth tasted like your tears, making you wince. You melted into the kiss, feeling safe, feeling content.
The kiss had gotten heated quickly, your hips bucking into the air, a faint âpleaseâ left your lips. He broke of the kiss, âHm? Couldnât hear you, princess..â âPlease, I-â he chuckled, âYou?â you looked down.. âI want.. more.. please?â Heâd move his hand to your chin, lifting it, enforcing eye contact.
âYour wish is my command, pretty girl.â He smirked, spreading your legs, and reaching under your pajama pants, finding your apparent lack of underwear. âOh..â he smirked âso wet already, all ready for me, right? No panties.. you wanted this.â His finger ran up your slit âyou were waiting for this.â Your head fell back, whimpering his name.
He groaned in appreciation, his hand moving to circle your clit, watching your hips buck, hearing your name fall from your mouth with no remorse, he loves this. He loves you. Always has.. âFeel good, doesnât it? Iâm gonna take care of you, Angel.â More whimpers left your mouth.
He didnât want to be too harsh on you, he wanted to take care of you, to apologize in the only way he knew. He was good with statistics, talked about them for hours, rambling as much as he could get in a conversation. His feelings? Theyâve always been hard for him, heâs best through expressing how he feels physically. This is his way of apologizing, and you knew it without him even telling you.
He stopped his circles to move his fingers down to your aching cunt, it tightening around nothing, you were his favorite sight heâs ever seen by far. âYou ready for them, princess?â He asks you, teasing you softly, ây- mhm, mhm yes.â You were essentially incoherent, he understood half of it, and the other half was answered by your bodyâs reaction to his words.
His fingers entered you slowly, but couldnât keep that pace for long, watching your face contort under him was something thatâs going to be ingrained in his mind for the rest of his life. His pace had sped up fairly quickly, not too fast where itâd hurt, but fast enough to make your legs shake with such ease you didnât even know how a person could do such things.
You gripped onto the sheets, whimpering incoherently, âI- p- lease⌠m- fuck.. closeâŚâ how he can make you so needy, and get you ever so close in such a short amount of time baffles the both of you, he chucked, moving faster.. anything for you, forever. Your head cocked forward and you had locked eyes with Spencer, âI- Reid.. Iâm- c-â he cut you off, âlet go for me baby, please. Let me make this up to you..â he brought his thumb back up to rub small, tight circles, matching the rhythm his fingers had kept.
Your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave. Your whole body warm, to cold, to hot, shaking like you had just hours before due to him. You had pulled your pajamas back up, and gotten closer to him, needing him.
The pit in your stomach was gone, vanishing without a trace.
âThank youâŚâ you smiled up at him, snuggling into his chest. He rubbed circles into your waist with his hand, âAnything, Angel. I donât care what I have to do, but I promise, Iâll make this up. You didnât deserve any of that, me leaving you? That was cruel, and Iâm sorry.â He took a deep breathe, âIâm never going to leave you like that again.â
You spoke up, âPromise? And I mean promise. No empty ones, but ones youâll stick to.â He smiled to himself, âPromise. Iâll fulfill however many promises it takes to make this one up to you..â you giggled, âI love you.â He whispered, making himself just loud enough so you could hear him, âI love you too.â
The room was livable again, I could breathe. I was relieved, the walls no longer feeling claustrophobic, I guess I wonât leave the team after all⌠Spencerâs worth waiting for.
A/N: Iâm so sorry this is SOOOO bad holy shit but here you guys go i hope uu like it! please, i beg.. tell me how i did or something feedback really helps w stuff like this đđ






