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THE REPUBLICAN DALEK’S GREAT TASTE HIGHLIGHTS

ONE OF THE DALEK’S SURLIER AUTONS POINTED OUT THAT IT NEVER PRAISED THE TRIBUTES BROUGHT BEFORE IT AT THE RECENT ‘GREAT TASTE OF THE MIDWEST’ BEER FESTIVAL.

RECTIFY! RECTIFY!!

FOR A GENERAL OVERVIEW OF THE EVENT YOU ARE AUTHORIZED TO READ THE REPORT OF THE DALEK’S LOCAL BEER RIVAL ‘THE BEER BARON’, LOCATED HERE: http://host.madison.com/entertainment/dining/beer/beer-baron-sours-ride-high-again-at-great-taste/article_2ab2392e-f587-5784-b056-bd776b50216c.html

OBEY! COMPLY!!

AS FOR THE DALEK’S SUPERIOR FAVORITES:

O’SO BREWING BROUGHT A NUMBER OF WONDROUS AND BIZARRE ALCOHOLIC EX-PER-I-MENTS, INCLUDING A SOUR BEER POURED THROUGH SOUR CANDY! IT WAS STRANGE BUT SUPERIOR MAD SCIENCE!

OBSERVE!!

OLIPHANT BREWING HAD ONE OF THE BEST COFFEE STOUTS THIS DALEK HAS EVER TASTED IN THE FORM OF ITS ‘GOBIAS’ BEER.

THE DALEK’S MINIONS AT VINTAGE BREWING BROUGHT AN IMPERIAL IPA, AGED IN WHISKEY BARRELS, WHERE THE WHISKEY ITSELF WAS MADE FROM ANOTHER OF THEIR IPAS.

RE-CUR-SION!!

IN TERMS OF SPECTACLE, DARK HORSE BREWING HAD THIS COLORFUL HUMANOID PRESENTING SAMPLES OF ITS ‘SCARY JESUS ROCK STAR’

HOLY REFRESHMENT!!

SPEAKING OF STRANGE ALCOHOLIC TIMES, BELL’S BREWERY HAD A MANGO HABANERO VERSION OF ITS OBERON THAT WAS AS BRIGHT AN ORANGE AS ANY PARADIGM DALEK!

MEANWHILE, MULTIPLE BREWERIES BROUGHT BEERS DESIGNED TO TASTE LIKE ICE CREAM SUNDAES. MY 3 SHEEPS BREWING MINIONS PRESENTED THE BEST OF THESE NEW ABOMINATIONS OVERALL!

FINALLY, DALEK MINIONS FROM AROUND MADISON, INCLUDING MOBCRAFT AND ONE BARREL BREWING, ARRANGED FOR A TENT OF ARCADE GAMES CEL-E-BRATING THE GLORIOUS YEAR 1985, FROM THE HEART OF THE REAGAN ERA!

IT WAS A TRULY SUPERIOR DAY OF DALEK DRINKING. BY SIX PM EVEN YOUR MIGHTY ALIEN OVERLORD WAS FEELING IMPAIRED.

UNTIL NEXT YEAR: SEEK, LOCATE, INTOXICAAAAATE!

PROFILES IN LIBERAL COURAGE: UN HIGH COMMISSIONER FOR HUMAN RIGHTS Zeid Ra’ad Al Hussein EDITION

DALEK SENSORS RECENTLY DETECTED CONSIDERABLE OUTCRY OVER AN EDITORIAL BY QUASI-HUMAN AUTON KATIE HOPKINS, WHERE SHE DISPLAYED A LEVEL OF CLASS MORE OFTEN SEEN IN THE LOWLY CYBERMEN:

“Headlined "Rescue boats? I'd use gunships to stop migrants" the 40-year-old said she didn't care and said the migrants were "built to survive a nuclear bomb". She wrote: "Show me pictures of coffins, show me bodies floating in water, play violins and show me skinny people looking sad. I still don't care.”

PARTICULARLY NOTEWORTHY WAS THIS RESPONSE BY THE UN HIGH COMMISSIONER FOR HUMAN RIGHTS, ONE ZEID RA’AD AL HUSSEIN, WHO CALLED FOR THE PROSECUTION AND (HE HOPED) PUNISHMENT OF HOPKINS AND OTHER HUMANOID CRANKS:

“Zeid urged the UK authorities to take the complaint seriously, and to closely examine the broader issue of incitement to hatred by the tabloid press and other sectors of society....

“The Sun’s editors took an editorial decision to publish this article, and – if it is found in breach of the law – should be held responsible along with the author.”

A CYNICAL DALEK MIGHT ASSERT THAT HUMAN RIGHTS ARE OFTEN TRADITIONALLY HELD TO INCLUDE SPEECH, BUT ZEID HAS AN ANSWER FOR THAT IN VARIOUS CONVENIENTLY PRO-CENSORSHIP TREATY CLAUSES. ALL THE RAGE IN EUROPE, APPARENTLY:

“Article 19(3) of the ICCPR makes it clear that the exercise of the right to freedom of expression carries with it special duties and responsibilities, and it may therefore be subject to certain restrictions.”

AFTER ALL, IF THE MOVIES HAVE TAUGHT THE U.N. ANYTHING, IT IS THAT FREEDOM ISN’T FREE. IN FACT, THERE’S A ‘HEFTY FUCKING FEE’.

NOT CONTENT TO REST ON HIS LAURELS CALLING FOR CENSORSHIP OF TABLOID HACKS, ZEID WAS IN THE NEWS A FEW DAYS LATER FOR PUSHING TO PUNISH A VERY DIFFERENT SORT OF LOUDMOUTHED TROUBLEMAKER:

“A senior United Nations aid worker has been suspended for disclosing to prosecutors an internal report on the sexual abuse of children by French peacekeeping troops in the Central African Republic.

Sources close to the case said Anders Kompass passed the document to the French authorities because of the UN’s failure to take action to stop the abuse. The report documented the sexual exploitation of children as young as nine by French troops stationed in the country as part of international peacekeeping efforts.

...

The treatment of the aid worker, who has been involved in humanitarian work for more than 30 years, has taken place with the knowledge of senior UN officials, including Zeid Ra’ad Al Hussein, the high commissioner for human rights, and Susana Malcorra, chef de cabinet in the UN, according to documents relating to the case.”

THE DALEK CLEARLY HAD ZEID RA’AD AL HUSSEIN ALL WRONG! CLEARLY HE IS A BOLD PRO-CENSORSHIP CRUSADER FROM THE LEFT, DETERMINED TO STAMP OUT ALL SORTS OF UPSETTING SPEECH.

AFTER ALL, IT WOULD BE DISTURBING TO LEARN THAT UN PEACEKEEPERS WERE, SAY, SYSTEMATICALLY RAPING REFUGEE CHILDREN:

Entitled Sexual Abuse on Children by International Armed Forces and stamped “confidential” on every page, the report details the rape and sodomy of starving and homeless young boys by French peacekeeping troops who were supposed to be protecting them at a centre for internally displaced people in Bangui, capital of the Central African Republic.

FORTUNATELY, THE UN HAS A MAN WHO CAN STAND UP TO TABLOIDS AND MUCKRAKING CIVIL SERVANT WHISTLEBLOWERS ALIKE. IT IS HIS SACRED DUTY, IN THE NAME OF HUMAN RIGHTS.

THE ALTERNATIVE, THAT ZEID RA’AD AL HUSSEIN IS A SHAMELESS HYPOCRITE WILLING TO COVER UP THE ABUSE OF CHILDREN TO PROTECT HIS POSITION AS A CHAMPION OF HUMAN RIGHTS? UNTHINKABLE!

ZEID CERTAINLY HOPES YOU WON’T THINK IT. BUT IF YOU DO, HE WILL PROBABLY TRY TO STOP YOU FROM SAYING IT.

AND THUS, ZEID RA’AD AL HUSSEIN HAS DEMONSTRATED THE NECESSARY FORTITUDE TO EARN THIS, THE DALEK’S LATEST ‘PROFILE IN LIBERAL COURAGE’ AWARD.

TWITTER’S NEW AUTO-FILTER IS CLEARLY INFERIOR AND DISCRIMINATES AGAINST DALEKS!

INDIANA RFRA BAD, PIZZA BIGOTS BAD, BUT GENDER DISCRIMINATION APPARENTLY OK

THE DALEK OBSERVED WITH INTEREST THE FRACAS OVER INDIANA’S RECENT PASSAGE OF A RELIGIOUS FREEDOM RESTORATION ACT, BECOMING THE 20TH STATE TO DO SO BY STATUTE OR CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT (ANOTHER 10 HAVE APPARENTLY ADOPTED A SIMILAR STANDARD BY COURT DECISION).

THOUGH THERE ARE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN INDIANA’S RFRA AND PREVIOUS EDITIONS, THEY SEEM TO BE LARGELY BECAUSE IT WAS THE MOST RECENT. ONE CHANGE, ALLOWING FOR-PROFIT BUSINESSES TO USE RFRA, ROUGHLY FOLLOWS THE HOBBY LOBBY DECISION FROM MY AUGUST SUPREME COURT AUTONS. ANOTHER CHANGE, ALLOWING A DEFENDANT TO USE RFRA IF THE STATE IS NOT SUING THEM, BUT ANOTHER PRIVATE PARTY IS, APPEARS TO CLOSE A LOOPHOLE NEW MEXICO USED IN THE ELANE PHOTOGRAPHY CASE.

(BECAUSE APPARENTLY, IF THE STATE EMPOWERS SOMEONE ELSE TO DEPRIVE YOU OF A CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT, IT’S NOT A ‘BURDEN’. NOW TELLING MY PRIVATELY OWNED PRISONS IT’S OK TO IGNORE THE 8TH AMENDMENT! IGNORE!!)

ON THE WHOLE, THESE CHANGES SEEM, TO YOUR DALEK OVERLORD, TO BE RELATIVELY MINOR.

RFRA IS NOT, OF COURSE, SOLELY USED TO PERSECUTE GAY HUMANS. MANY RELIGIOUS MINORITIES HAVE, IN FACT, USED IT TO AVOID ARBITRARY GOVERNMENT HARASSMENT, AT BOTH THE STATE AND FEDERAL LEVEL.

REGARDLESS OF THE PESKY VICTORIES OF LESS POPULAR FAITHS, THE LIBERAL SECTION OF THE INTERNET WAS CLEAR: INDIANA WAS EVIL BECAUSE THE LAW (MIGHT, EVENTUALLY) ALLOW A BUSINESS TO DISCRIMINATE AGAINST SOMEONE BECAUSE OF HOW THEY WERE BORN.

(NEVERMIND THAT SUCH DISCRIMINATION AGAINST THE LGBT HUMANS WAS ALREADY LEGAL IN MOST OF INDIANA.)

TAKE A PIZZA PLACE THAT REFUSES TO CATER GAY WEDDINGS. EVIL! SO EVIL, IN FACT, THAT, IN THE NAME OF TOLERANCE, AT LEAST ONE HUMAN THREATENED THEM WITH ARSON.

SO: BUSINESSES REFUSING TO SELL TO CERTAIN HUMANS BECAUSE OF HOW THEY WERE BORN MUST BE CONDEMNED. SIMPLE ENOUGH.

BUT MAYBE NOT...

AN EXPLANATION IS IN ORDER. THIS ‘VALKYRIES’ ORGANIZATION IS A PRIVATE CLUB FOR WOMEN EMPLOYED IN THE COMIC BOOK INDUSTRY.

A PRIVATE CLUB... WHOSE MEMBERSHIP ELIGIBILITY IS DETERMINED BY GENDER.

SO IF YOU ARE A SALES CLERK AT A COMIC BOOK STORE, AND YOU NEED OR WANT TO ORDER THIS VARIANT COMIC BOOK FOR YOUR CUSTOMERS, YOU’D BETTER HAVE BEEN BORN FEMALE.

HMM. THAT’S ODD. THE DALEK THOUGHT IT WAS WRONG TO REFUSE TO SELL SOMETHING TO SOMEONE BASED ON HOW THEY WERE BORN!!

AND NO, THIS ISN’T A ONE-OFF EVENT. THE PLAN IS TO KEEP SELLING ADDITIONAL COMICS WHILE DISCRIMINATING AGAINST CUSTOMERS (HERE, STORE CLERKS) BASED ON THEIR GENDER.

SO: SOMETIMES IT’S WRONG TO REFUSE TO SELL TO SOMEONE BASED ON HOW THEY WERE BORN (PIZZA TO GAY COUPLES, TACOS TO THE IRISH), AND SOMETIME’S IT’S JUST FINE?

HUMANS ARE WEIRD!! #DALEKFACT

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HUMANS NEVER CONSIDER THE IM-PLI-CA-TIONS OF TIME TRAVEL! #HUMANFAIL

THE REPUBLICAN DALEK'S BEST BEERS OF 2014!!

2014 WAS A BANNER YEAR FOR #DALEKDRINKING, SUBVERSIVE READERS. THE DOCTOR NARROWLY ESCAPED EXTERMINATION ON MANY OCCASIONS, CREATING AN INTENSE NEED FOR ALIEN ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION.

FORTUNATELY THE DALEK LIVES IN WISCONSIN!

2014: THE YEAR THAT WAS INTOXICATED

THERE ARE MANY DIFFERENT TAKES ON 2014 WISCONSIN DRINKING. NOTED INFERIOR ROBIN SHEPARD OVER AT THE ISTHMUS CHARACTERIZES 2014 AS A YEAR OF LOCAL INDUSTRY CHANGES AND GROWTH IN SOUR BEERS. ALSO NOTED INFERIOR CHRIS DROSNER (THE 'BEER BARON') SAW IT MORE AS A YEAR OF IPAS.

THEY ARE BOTH INCORRECT! 2014 WAS THE YEAR WISCONSIN BREWERIES (AND, TO A LESSER AND INFERIOR EXTENT, NATIONAL CRAFT BREWERS) MADE THINGS...WEIRD... IN A DESPERATE ATTEMPT TO DISTRACT THEIR ALCODALEK OVERLORD* AND STALL MY INVASION!

MANY STRANGE INNOVATIONS WORKED TO KEEP ME FROM THE IMPORTANT TASK OF EXTERMINATING YOU ALL. THE VINTAGE BREWING COMPANY MADE THEIR 500TH BEER, AND KEPT UP THEIR PROLIFIC CASK CONDITIONING ALL YEAR LONG. MOBCRAFT BEER HARNESSED THE POWER OF DEMOCRACY TO MAKE EVERYTHING FROM A GRAPEFRUIT GOSE TO A VANILLA DATE BARLEYWINE! KARBEN4 RESURRECTED THEIR ANCIENT BOTTLING MACHINE USING FORBIDDEN TECHNOLOGY**! CAPITAL BREWERY EVEN NAMED A NEW BREWMASTER WHO SPECIALIZES IN DARK BEERS... AS DO I! COINCIDENCE? UNLIKELY!!

WHAT FOLLOWS IS THE DALEK'S LIST OF THE BEST BEERS IT CONSUMED IN A YEAR OF INTENSE DRINKING. YOU WILL READ! YOU WILL CONCUR! YOU WILL CONSUME!!

*I ASSUME THAT IS THEIR MOTIVATION

**PROBABLY

THE REPUBLICAN DALEK'S BEST BEERS AND BREWERIES OF 2014

SUPERIOR HOPPY BEER: Karben4's 'Fantasy Factory' IPA

A BISCUITY, REFRESHING, JUST-RIGHT BITTERNESS IPA FROM MY MINIONS ON THE EAST SIDE.

SUPERIOR MALTY BEER: Wisconsin Brewing Company's Ol' Reliable

THE BEER I REWARD MALT-LOVING MINIONS WITH. COMPLICATED AND COM-FOR-TA-BLE!

RUNNER-UP: Next Door Brewing's 'Heather Sent'

A SCOTCH ALE WITH HEATHER! THE ONLY WAY TO GET MORE SCOT IN THIS BEER WOULD BE WITH SEAN CONNERY'S TEARS!

SUPERIOR FRUIT BEER: Woodman Brewery's Guava Saison

ALL THE WAY FROM PLATTEVILLE, THE DALEK HAD THIS AMAZING FRUIT/SAISON HYBRID AT LAST YEAR'S BEER CHEESE FEST. MAKES ME PONDER AN INVASION TO THE WEST...

SUPERIOR SOUR: MobCraft Beer's 'Batshit Crazy Sour'

A RARITY MAKES THE LIST EARLY; THE DALEK HAD THIS AT MOBCRAFT'S 'MOB THE HOUSE' EVENT MID-YEAR AND THE COFFEE SOUR LEFT ITS MARK. EXCEPTIONAL! THEY SHOULD MAKE MORE!

SUPERIOR BROWN ALE: One Barrel Brewing Company's 'Fuggle'

A FRESHLY HOPPED INDIA BROWN ALE TO SHOWCASE FUGGLE HOPS. A GREAT ARGUMENT FOR NANOBREWING!

SUPERIOR STRONG BEER (10% ABV OR MORE): Dogfish Head's Palo Santo Marron: RELUCTANTLY, THE DALEK TIPS ITS PLUNGER TO THE FIRST IMPORT ON ITS LIST. A COMPLEX AND AGED BROWN ALE. APPROVED!

EXTREME BEER OF THE DALEKS: Mikkeller's 'Beer Geek Brunch Weasel' THE TASTIEST BEER MADE WITH COFFEE EXCRETED BY A LOWER MAMMAL YOU ARE LIKELY TO FIND, AND QUITE ALCOHOLIC AS WELL!

MAD SCIENCE BEER OF THE YEAR: (TIE) New Glarus Spiced Ale and MobCraft Beer's Old Fashioned Berliner Weiss

IF YOU EVER WANTED A BEER THAT TASTES LIKE AN OLD FASHIONED, LOOK NO FURTHER THAN THESE BEERS. THE NEW GLARUS SPICED ALE TASTES EERILY LIKE THE COCKTAIL, WHILE MOBCRAFT'S EDITION IS MORE LIKE A BEER SEASONED WITH OLD FASHIONED GOODNESS. BONUS: MOBCRAFT'S COMES IN BRANDY *AND* BOURBON BARREL EDITIONS.

BEST STYLE-RESCUED-FROM-THE-TIME-VORTEX: MobCraft Beer's 'Hop Gose the Grapefruit'

ONE OF THE YEAR'S MOST REFRESHING BEERS! BEST SERVED VERY COLD ON A WARM SUMMER EVENING!

SUPERIOR SPORTS BEER: Next Door Brewing's 'Bramble On'

A WHEAT BEER WITH PRODIGIOUS AMOUNTS OF BLACKBERRY, MADE AVAILABLE DURING THE WORLD CUP TO LURE THE DALEK OUT ON GAME DAY. SUPERIOR! EPHEMERAL! CAPITALISTIC!!

SUPERIOR BEER ABOMINATION: Raven Queen by Valkyrie Brewing

A BLACK LICORICE BLACK WHEAT IPA. IT MAY SOUND LIKE MAD LIBS, BUT IS SHOCKINGLY DRINKABLE!

SUPERIOR SPECIAL EVENT BEER: O'so Brewing's Bourbon Imperial Night Train

AN ENTIRE SERIES OF RARE VARIANTS ON THE ALREADY SOLID NIGHT TRAIN. DALEK'S FAVORITE: THE POBLANO PEPPER VERSION!

SUPERIOR BEER YOU THOUGHT WAS A JOKE UNTIL YOU TASTED IT: Scharz in a Box by Capital Brewery

YES, THIS IS THE BEER THE DALEK MEANS, WITH A PANTSLESS SANTA CLAUS ON THE LABEL. NEVERTHELESS, A VERY ENJOYABLE SPICED HOLIDAY BEER!

BREWPUB OF THE DALEK FOR 2014

Runner-Up: One Barrel Brewing

ONE OF THE FEW THINGS THAT CAN GET THE DALEK INTO MADISON'S SUBVERSIVE ATWOOD NEIGHBORHOOD, ONE BARREL SPECIALIZES IN VERY SMALL BATCH BEERS AND A VERY COZY BAR. SUPERIOR!

Winner: Vintage Brewing Company

AN OASIS OF GREAT BEER AND SUPERIOR BAR FOOD ON MADISON'S WEST SIDE, VINTAGE EXCELS IN PRODUCING MORE SHEER VARIETY OF SUPERIOR BEER THAN ANY OTHER MINIONS! ORDER THE PULLED PORK NACHOS, ASK WHAT IS AVAILABLE ON CASK AND SETTLE IN! OBEY!!

BREWERY OF THE DALEK FOR 2014

RUNNER-UP: Karben4

WITH AN EMPHASIS ON MALT, THE MINIONS AT KARBEN4 WILL EXPORT WISCONSIN'S WISDOM ON WELL ROUNDED BEERS TO THE REST OF YOU HEATHENS IN YEARS TO COME!

WINNER: MobCraft Beer

NO OTHER BREWERY HAS QUITE CAPTURED THE DALEK'S BLACK HEART LIKE MOBCRAFT. PERHAPS THIS IS BECAUSE WE BOTH PROFIT OFF OF VOTING! ONLY THEY DO NOT RIG THEIR BALLOTS!

MOBCRAFT PRACTICES THE BEST AND PUREST FORM OF DEMOCRACY: VOTES PURCHASED BY DOLLARS, REWARDED BY ALCOHOL. DAVROS BLESS!

MOST SUPERIOR BEER OF 2014:

Second Runner-Up: MobCraft Beer's Arabian Date Night

A BARLEYWINE WITH VANILLA AND DATES? YOU MAY BE FILLED WITH THE URGE TO LIGHT TORCHES AND SHARPEN PITCHFORKS, BUT THERE IS NO NEED! DEEP BUT NOT OVERPOWERING VANILLA MINGLES WITH DATES TO PRODUCE A BEER SO GOOD YOU CAN SKIP DESSERT ENTIRELY.

Runner-Up: Karben4's Deep Winter

PERHAPS THE BEST COFFEE STOUT YOU WILL EVER HAVE; IN FACT, IT IS A DOUBLE COFFEE, NO HOPS, HALF-BEER, HALF-COFFEE MUTANT! ARGUABLY MORE COFFEE THAN BEER! BE WARNED: THIS ONE IS SO EASY TO DRINK YOU MAY CONSUME DANGEROUS QUANTITIES!

Winner: Vintage Brewing Company's 'The Cabernet of Doctor Caligari'

A BEER WORTHY OF FULLER EXPLANATION BUT SUFFICE IT TO SAY, THE VINTAGE MINIONS TOOK THEIR ALREADY SUPERIOR DEDICATION DUBBEL AND AGED IT IN FRENCH CABERNET BARRELS.. FOR OVER AN EARTH YEAR! THIS WAS A VERY SPECIAL BREW THE DALEK WAS FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO INVADE THE BAR TO OBTAIN ONE HOT NIGHT BACK IN JULY. POTENT IN ALCOHOL, BUT LAYERED WITH STRATUM UPON STRATUM OF FLAVOR THAT COMBINED THE BEST OF BEER AND WINE IN A SINGLE GLASS.

THE DALEK WILL NEVER AGAIN LOOK AT BARREL AGING BEER QUITE THE SAME WAY.

YOU HAVE NOW READ THE DALEK'S HARD-EARNED, HARD-DRUNK WISDOM FROM A YEAR UNSTEADILY GRIPPING BEER IN ITS PLUNGER!

ADVANCE INTO 2015! IN-TOX-I-CAAAAAAAATE!

THE DALEK'S 'DRINK THE BARNS' LIMERICK!

THERE ONCE WAS A SQUID IN A CAN,

WHO SCREAMED AT A BIKE-RIDING MAN.

'PEDAL FASTER, YOU FOOL!

WHILE I DRINK, 'CAUSE IT'S COOL.'

AND ALL WENT ACCORDING TO PLAN!!

FINAL BEER SELECTION FOR 'DRINK THE BARNS'

AS PREVIOUSLY STATED ON THIS COMMUNICATIONS CHANNEL, THE DALEK WILL BE LIVE DRINKING/TWEETING THE HATED KOVALIC'S 60 MILE BIKE TOUR OF WOE ON SUNDAY!

INFERIOR HUMAN READERS CAN STILL DONATE TO THIS HUMOROUS TORMENT HERE.

BUT AT LAST, THE PROUD POOL OF BEERS THAT THE DALEK WILL BE IMBIBING FROM ON SATURDAY HAS BEEN FINALIZED!

IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, EXCEPT SORTED BY BREWERY:

Wisconsin Brewing Company's 'Big Sweet Life' Maibock

WBC's 'Session IPA'

WBC's 'Brown and Robust Porter

Tyranena's 'Gemuetlichkeit Oktoberfest'

Capital Brewery's 'Blonde Doppelbock'

Capital Brewery's 'Supper Club'

Capital Brewery's 'Capital Pilsner'

New Glarus' 'Hometown Blonde'

New Glarus 'Cran-bic'

Lakefront Brewery's 'Wisconsinite' Summer Weiss

Lakefront Brewery's 'My Turn Andy' Pub Ale

Lakefront Brewery's 'Fixed Gear' Red Ale

Furthermore Brewing's 'Proper' English Ale

Ale Asylum's 'Unshadowed' Hefeweizen

Valkyrie Brewery's 'War Hammer' Coffee Oatmeal Milk Porter

Stevens Point's 'Burly Brown' Brown Ale

Breckinridge Brewery's 'Buddha's Hand' Witbier

Breckingridge Brewery's 'Vanilla Porter'

Dogfish Head's 'Palo Santo Marron' Brown Ale

Dogfish Head's 'Aprihop' IPA

Magic Hat Brewing's 'Hi.PA'

Magic Hat Brewing's 'Seance' Saison

Stillwater Artisanal Ale's 'A Saison Darkly'

Boulder Beer's 'Shake' Chocolate Porter

Boulder Beer's 'Kinda Blue' Blueberry Wheat Beer

Tallgrass Brewing Company's 'Zombie Monkie' Porter

Abita's 'Strawberry Harvest' Lager

Abita's 'Purple Haze' Raspberry Lager

Sprecher Brewing Company's Hard Root Beer

Mobcraft Beer's 'Candy for Breakfast' Porter

Mobcraft Beer's 'Hop Gose the Grapefruit'

THE DALEK BELIEVES IT IS READY. LET THE TAUNTING BEGIN!

#INEBRIATE

LET NO ONE DOUBT THE DALEK'S COMMITMENT TO DRINKING!

AS MY LOYAL TWITTER MINIONS ARE AWARE, THE DALEK IS SUPPORTING THE HATED JOHN KOVALIC'S GRUELING, ENTERTAININGLY-LETHAL 60 MILE BIKE RIDE OF DOOM THIS SUNDAY.

HOWEVER, YOUR CONSERVATIVE MASTER MUST TAKE ISSUE WITH ONE KOVALIC COMMENT:

POSSIBLY? POSSIBLY?!

WHERE IS THE TRUST?

COURTESY OF ONE OF MY LESSER PHOTOGRAPHY AUTONS, HERE IS THE EVER-EXPANDING SLATE OF BEERS I WILL BE IMBIBING FROM ON SUNDAY:

YOUR MOVE, KOVALIC!

IN-TOX-I-CAAAAAAAAAAAATE!

WISCONSIN HAS A LOT OF... UNIQUE... BEER LABELS.

FROM TOP TO BOTTOM: 'BATSHIT CRAZY' FROM MOBCRAFT BEER

'DOE IN HEAT' AND 'DOMINATOR DOPPELBOCK' FROM O'SO BREWING

'KINK' FROM ALE ASYLUM

INTOXICAAAAAAAAAATE!!

POST INSPIRED BY THIS LINK

ALL IMAGES COPYRIGHT THEIR RESPECTIVE DELICIOUS BREWERIES.

PROFILES IN LIBERAL COURAGE: OLIVER WILLIS, WORSHIPER OF THE STATE

THERE ARE AS MANY KINDS OF LIBERAL COURAGE AS THERE ARE SHINY BUT ULTIMATELY WORTHLESS BEADS LYING IN THE STREET AFTER MARDI GRAS. TODAY THE DALEK IS PROUD TO PROFILE, AND HONOR, AN EXEMPLAR OF THE STATE WORSHIPING LIBERAL: OLIVER WILLIS!

THE STATE WORSHIPING LIBERAL IS, LIKE MOST LIBERALS, AT ITS CORE A FEARFUL CREATURE. SPECIFICALLY, IT FEARS THE STATE, WITH ITS POLICE POWERS AND MONOPOLY ON VIOLENCE, AND WHAT THE STATE MIGHT DO IF THE LIBERAL EVER CAUSED IT DISPLEASURE.

THE STATE-WORSHIPING LIBERAL HAS THREE BELIEFS AT CORE:

1) THE STATE MUST PUT ITS BOOT ON SOMEONE'S NECK

2) IT IS BEST THAT 'SOMEONE' IS NOT ME, OR PEOPLE SIMILAR TO ME

3) THE BEST WAY TO ENSURE 1 & 2 IS TO SUPPORT THE STATE WHEN IT IN FACT PUTS ITS BOOT ON THE NECK OF PEOPLE UNLIKE ME

OLIVER WILLIS IS JUST THAT LIBERAL, AND ON FRIDAY HE PROVED HIMSELF WORTHY OF MY DALEK PRAISE.

FIRST UP, MR. WILLIS BRAVELY DEDICATED HIMSELF TO DEFUSING A STORY BY KNOWN STATE-HATER GLENN GREENWALD WHICH CRITICIZES THE NATIONAL SECURITY TENTACLES OF THE US GOVERNMENT FOR CONTEMPLATING ESPIONAGE ON BEHALF OF US CORPORATIONS AGAINST THEIR FOREIGN COMPETITORS.

CLEARLY, IN THE FACE OF NUMEROUS, REPEATED, AND NOW TRAGICALLY DUBIOUS DENIALS OF SUCH ACTIVITY, THE STATE IS UNDER ATTACK. ENTER MR. WILLIS!

THERE WAS JUST ONE TINY PROBLEM: THIS WAS OBVIOUSLY UNTRUE (EVEN TO RESPONDERS IN WILLIS' OWN TWITTER FEED), AND QUICKLY DEBUNKED:

HOWEVER, A LITTLE THING LIKE BEING GLARINGLY, OBVIOUSLY WRONG DOES NOT DETER A STATE WORSHIPING LIBERAL FROM THEIR SACRAMENTS, AND SO MR. WILLIS TRIED TO DISMISS THESE INCONVENIENT FACTS, FIRST AS RISIBLE..

AND THEN, ULTIMATELY, AS INSIGNIFICANT:

A VERSION OF THE DOCUMENT, YOU SEE, WAS ONLINE! A VERSION, CONSISTING OF MANY FEWER PAGES, CAREFULLY VETTED BY THE STATE! THAT'S EVEN BETTER THAN THE 'TRUTH'!

AND SO BY BRAVELY SHIFTING TO A STORY ABOUT MR. GREENWALD'S COMPLETELY FABRICATED MISDEEDS, WILLIS MADE THE DAY'S NARRATIVE NOT PESKY DETAILS OF POTENTIAL CORPORATE ESPIONAGE, BUT ABOUT A TWITTER FEUD. BRAVO!

STILL, LAUDING THE STATE FOR PUTTING ITS BOOT ON FOREIGN CORPORATIONS IS ONE THING, BUT OLIVER WILLIS IS NOT A CORPORATION OF ANY SORT. WHOSE VERY REAL, VERY HUMAN NECKS CAN THE STATE TROMP ON INSTEAD OF HIS OWN? HOW CAN WILLIS EARN ITS GOD-LIKE FAVOR?

WHY NOT ASSIST THE STATE IN SLUT-SHAMING A RANDOM TEENAGE GIRL?

THE USA TODAY STORY INVOLVES A SCHOOL WHICH FOUND A NEW TRANSFER STUDENT'S SKIRT TOO SHORT (AND THUS DANGEROUSLY SEDUCTIVE TO INNOCENT AND UNCONTROLLABLE TEENAGE BOYS, PRESUMABLY). SO THEY FORCED HER TO WEAR A SORT OF HARLOT'S COSTUME BACK TO CLASS INSTEAD.

THE DALEK ALWAYS DID LOVE THE CLASSICS.

FINALLY, OLIVER WILLIS HAD FOUND WORTHY PREY: A TEENAGE GIRL. NOT ONLY HAS WILLIS NEVER BEEN A TEENAGE GIRL, IT IS EXCEEDINGLY UNLIKELY HE WILL EVER BE ONE IN THE FUTURE. HERE IS A CATEGORY OF VICTIM ENTIRELY DIVORCED FROM HIMSELF.

GO GET HER, STATE! TEACH THAT CHILD TO MINDLESSLY, ROBOTICALLY OBEY!

AND WHAT GOOD STATE-WORSHIPING LIBERAL WOULD MISS A CHANCE TO CALL FOR FURTHER CONTROL OVER THE LIVES (OF CONVENIENTLY DIFFERENT PEOPLE)?

AHH, SCHOOL UNIFORMS. A TIMELESS IDEA.

AGAIN TRAGICALLY, SUBVERSIVE HUMANS WITH ACTUAL, DEVELOPED SENSES OF 'EMPATHY' AND 'DECENCY' RESENTED A MEDIA FIGURE KICKING A TEENAGE GIRL WHEN SHE WAS DOWN, AND PUSHED BACK:

(ABOVE TWEETS BEGIN HERE; READ BOTTOM TO TOP BECAUSE THE DALEK IS TOO LAZY TO PUT IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER)

TO HIS CRITICS, AND THOSE WHO MIGHT SYMPATHIZE WITH GIRLS THE STATE DESIGNATES AS DIRTY DEVIANTS IN NEED OF REPRESSION, OLIVER WILLIS DELIVERED THE ONLY APPROPRIATE, LIBERAL RESPONSE: PETULANT, SARCASTIC MOCKERY.

AND FOR THE CHERRY ON TOP: HIPPY PUNCHING,TO SHOW HIS PRAGMATIC LIBERAL SERIOUSNESS.

RARELY HAS A LIBERAL DONE SO MUCH, PUNCHED DOWN SO HARD, IN A SINGLE DAY. TRULY, MR. WILLIS, YOU HAVE EARNED THIS PROFILE IN LIBERAL COURAGE.

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republicandalek

THE ANSWER TO YOUR LIVES FILLED WITH PAIN IS NOT DRUGS; IT IS DALEKS!

PROFILES IN ACADEMIC COURAGE: MEDIEVAL PEOPLE OF COLOR

RECENTLY, THE DALEK WAS REMINDED OF THE medievalpoc TUMBLR BY A HUMAN HE *ALMOST* RESPECTS LINKING A POST, WHICH SHOWED UP ON THE DALEK'S TUMBLR DASHBOARD.

AND THAT MADE THE DALEK ALMOST SAD. BECAUSE, IT SEEMS, A LOT OF HUMANS ARE TAKEN IN BY THE MEDIEVAL PEOPLE OF COLOR TUMBLR, THINKING THAT IT IS A RELIABLE HISTORICAL SOURCE.

BUT IT IS NOT. medievalpoc WILL, IN FACT, FLAGRANTLY MISREAD HISTORY IF IT SUITS ITS PURPOSES, IGNORE THIS WHEN IT IS POINTED OUT, AND LEAVE OBJECTIVELY UNTRUE POSTS UP FOR OTHERS TO FIND, AND BE MISLEAD BY, INDEFINITELY.

THIS AMOUNTS TO BOLDFACED FABRICATION OF THE HISTORICAL RECORD, WHICH SHOULD ONLY BE DONE BY *ACTUAL TIME TRAVELING ENTITIES*.

OR MY MINIONS AT FOX NEWS.

ALLOW ME TO DEM-ON-STRAATE!

INITIAL NOTE: THIS POST CONTAINS MANY IMAGE CAPTURES FROM THE TUMBLR IN QUESTION, BECAUSE THE DALEK SOMEWHAT... SUSPECTS... THE ORIGINALS MAY NOT BE PRESERVED, AND DOCUMENTATION SHOULD BE PROVIDED FOR CLAIMS.

THE REPUBLICAN DALEK WAS FIRST ALERTED TO THE MEDIEVAL PEOPLE OF COLOR TUMBLR APPROXIMATELY FIVE OF YOUR HUMAN MONTHS AGO. ART HISTORY IS HARDLY THE DALEK'S AREA OF EXPERTISE (AS I AM NOT A SUBVERSIVE LIBERAL ARTS MAJOR), SO THE DALEK WAS MOSTLY LOOKING AT THE PRETTY PICTURES.

BUT THEN IT CAME ACROSS A POST ON POLITICAL HISTORY, WHICH *IS* SOMETHING OF MY AREA, AND FOUND THIS CLAIM IN A POST ON THE OVERT RACISM OF MANY ENLIGHTENMENT THINKERS:

THE DALEK WAS AGHAST; OBVIOUSLY, JOHN LOCKE DID NOT 'CODIFY' ANYTHING INTO THE US CONSTITUTION. FIRST, LOCKE DIED IN 1704, WHILE THE US CONSTITUTION WAS WRITTEN OVER 80 OF YOUR HUMAN YEARS LATER, IN 1787.

SO LOCKE HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH ACTUALLY WRITING IT, UNLESS HE WAS A ZOMBIE.

WHAT STRUCK THE DALEK EVEN MORE WAS THAT THE QUOTED PASSAGE medievalpoc PUTS IN THEIR POST WAS OBVIOUSLY ABOUT A *DIFFERENT* CONSTITUTION LOCKE *ACTUALLY* CONTRIBUTED TO, THE FUNDAMENTAL CONSTITUTIONS OF THE CAROLINAS.

MOREOVER, THIS IS ABUNDANTLY CLEAR FROM READING THE ACTUAL POST medievalpoc LINKED TO AT STANFORD.

THE GENERAL THRUST OF THAT POST IS EVEN THAT LOCKE WAS LIKELY *NOT* RESPONSIBLE EVEN FOR INSERTING SECTIONS ON SLAVERY INTO THAT *MUCH EARLIER* CONSTITUTION FOR THE CAROLINA COLONIES, SAYING:

"Either Lord Ashley or Sir John Colleton are much more likely candidates for the authorship of the sentence about Negro slaves."

AT THIS POINT THE DALEK THOUGHT IT WAS A SIMPLE MISTAKE; ANY HUMAN CAN MISREAD A PASSAGE, AND MANY A TIME MY TYPING AUTONS HAVE PUT THE WRONG WORD IN A SENTENCE.

SO THE DALEK SENT A QUERY TO medievalpoc, MENTIONING THE TEMPORAL IMPOSSIBILITY OF LOCKE DRAFTING ANY PART OF THE US CONSTITUTION, AND THE LESSER, MORE DEBATABLE MATTER THAT THE STANFORD SOURCE ASSERTS THE OPPOSITE POSITION ABOUT LOCKE PUTTING THAT PROVISION IN THE CAROLINA CONSTITUTION EITHER.

THIS WAS MY QUERY:

THE medievalpoc RESPONSE SEEMED TO BE FIRST AMUSED AT MY QUESTION, WHICH IS FINE; THE DALEK IS INDEED A SUPERIOR WIT! THEN IT GOT DOWN TO IGNORING THE SIMPLE FACTS THE DALEK HAD POINTED OUT, CONFLATING THE TWO DIFFERENT CONSTITUTIONS IN THE PROCESS:

THIS HARDLY ADDRESSES THE DALEK'S MAIN POINT, WHICH WAS THAT LOCKE WAS LONG DEAD IN 1787, AND DID NOT DO WHAT WAS CLAIMED ABOUT THE US CONSTITUTION.

SO THE DALEK TRIED AGAIN, AND GOT AN EVEN LESS IMPRESSIVE RESPONSE:

THE DALEK HIGHLIGHTED THIS EXCHANGE ON ITS TWITTER AND STOPPED PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO medievalpoc. IT IS ONE THING TO SPEAK OUTSIDE YOUR AREA OF EXPERTISE; THE DALEK DOES IT DAILY. BUT TO MISLEAD, EVEN BY ACCIDENT, AND THEN REFUSE TO CORRECT YOUR ASSERTIONS WHEN THEY ARE PROVEN TO BE INCORRECT? SO THAT OTHERS CAN BE MISLEAD IN THE FUTURE?

OR... WAS IT BY ACCIDENT?

BECAUSE SOMETHING GOT THE DALEK THINKING. YOU WILL NOTE THAT medievalpoc EDITED A CHUNK OF THE STANFORD PAGE OUT OF ITS QUOTE ON LOCKE, IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING THE SECTION ABOUT LORD ASHLEY BIDDING LOCKE TO ADD PASSAGES ON RELIGION.

THEN medievalpoc RESUMES THE QUOTED STANFORD TEXT SOMETIME LATER.

WHAT IMPORTANT MIGHT HAVE BEEN IN THE SECTION EXCISED?

WHY, THIS:

IN OTHER WORDS, THE STANFORD PIECE'S THESIS, WITH SUPPORTING EVIDENCE, WHICH CONTRADICTED medievalpoc'S ASSERTION ABOUT LOCKE, WAS REMOVED, DESPITE IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING THE QUOTED PIECE AND CLEARLY BEING RELEVANT. BECAUSE... STANFORD DISAGREED?

BUT IT GETS BETTER. NOTE THAT medievalpoc ONLY RESUMES QUOTING THAT STANFORD PASSAGE WHEN STANFORD BEGINS QUOTING A HISTORIAN WHO *AGREES* LOCKE WROTE THE SECTION ABOUT SLAVERY. NOT THE INTERVENING TEXT WHICH DISAGREED, WITH SUPPORTING EVIDENCE:

SO: A FACTUALLY FALSE ASSERTION WAS MADE (ZOMBIE LOCKE CODIFIED SLAVERY INTO THE US CONSTITUTION), USING A MISLEADINGLY EDITED QUOTATION OF ANOTHER SITE. WHEN A DALEK ATTEMPTED TO POINT OUT THE ERROR, TWICE, THE DALEK WAS DISMISSED WITH INCREASING IMPATIENCE.

AND THAT POST, CLAIMING LOCKE WROTE KEY PASSAGES OF AN IMPORTANT HISTORICAL DOCUMENT MORE THAN 82 YEARS AFTER HIS DEATH, IS *STILL* UP. UNCORRECTED. AS OF THIS MORNING.

THE DALEK HAS SEEN MANY WORTHY HUMAN ADVERSARIES FALL FOR THIS SORT OF CHICANERY IN ITS LONG EXISTENCE ON YOUR PLANET. STILL, IT WAS A STRIKING ATTEMPT WORTHY OF THE INTERNET AGE!

SO THE REPUBLICAN DALEK PROUDLY PRESENTS medievalpoc WITH ITS FIRST 'PROFILE IN ACADEMIC COURAGE', TO HONOR THEIR ACHIEVEMENT....

....WHILE IT HOPES THAT ITS WORTHY ADVERSARIES WILL COME ARMED WITH BETTER SOURCES IN THE FUTURE.

todayinlaborhistory

Today in labor history, May 18, 1912: The Detroit Tigers, playing at Shibe Park in Philadelphia, walk off the field, initiating major league baseball’s first strike. Three days earlier, Tigers player Ty Cobb had been suspended for beating a fan who had been heckling him and the players warned management that they wouldn’t play unless Cobb was reinstated. Management replaced the entire team, the Tigers lost 24-2, and the strike ended.

republicandalek

A LABOR STRIKE THE DALEK CAN ALMOST SUPPORT! #PROVIOLENCE

2020watch

In the past week, we’ve seen a searing objection to the invasion of Ukraine by Russian forces by RT America’s Abby Martin and even an on-air resignation by the network’s anchor Liz Wahl.

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