Many of us know Olive Gardenâs slogan When Youâre Here, Youâre Family. Well, I recently put that to the test.
The tables were wooden and nice to sit at. The chairs were also comfortable. The view wasnât anything special, but there was a pretty cool looking van in the Walmart parking lot that had flames on its sides.Â
I was immediately offered wine, and after admitting I was underage, refused wine. If youâre going to offer me wine, please donât rescind your offer. Itâs common courtesy.
The napkins were probably the highlight. They were cloth and worked really well at cleaning the windows. One waiter told me I didnât have to do that, but I insisted. After all, I like a good, clear view of parking lots. Who doesnât.
Finally, it was time to order. I went with the pizza. The menu said I could pick four toppings, so I chose half portions of eight toppings. There were only seven to choose from, though, so I made one up. ââŠand blorgaspork.â
âSorry? What is blorgaspork?â
âThatâs your job to know, now isnât it.â
After a reasonable wait, my food arrived. It was a really good meal, not exactly overpriced, but not exactly underpriced either. It was just priced.
My waiter soon arrived and asked me if I wanted dessert.Â
âSteve,â I said, âHave a seat.â
âI have this business idea. And while Iâm here, and weâre family, I was hoping you could give me a loan.â
Steve tried to laugh it off. Like it was some kind of joke. I was offended and he could tell. âSteve, this isnât a joke.â
Steve looked a bit nervous. I grabbed his hands and pinned them to the table. âAre we family or not, Steve.â
âNot in the literal senseâŠâ said Steve. I wasnât going to let him reason his way out of this one.Â
âLook, Steve. I cleaned your windows. Family does that for each other. They clean each othersâ windows. Now, donât you think I deserve that loan? Weâre family, Steve, weâre family.â
Steve handed me 13 bucks. âThanks, Steve.â
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