A Few Pro Wrestling Matches from 2022
(in chronological order)
((this post is long , sorry))
{4.75 stars & The Beautiful Excess award}
Just 3 weeks after having a legitimately perfect 1-hour match, they have to follow it up with something that matches their previous brilliance without being too similar. The easy solution was to further the game of one-upmanship present in their first encounter but with half the length. Main difference here is that the challenge Danielson presented to Adam Page went from "can you keep up with me, champ?" to "can you handle me headbutting you for 10 actual minutes?" Yeah, it's probably not a great idea for Bryan Danielson, owner of prowres' most valuable brain since Bobby Heenan, to engage in vicious head-based offense... but I guess he was fine. Who are we to question The American Dolphin?
{4.5 stars & The Overcoming All Odds award}
Adam Page was AEW's best world champion and I doubt I'll change my mind until we see a champion come out on top in a manner as bonkers as this. You've probably seen a few deathmatches this year? I've only seen a few throughout the year. No single ultraviolent spot made me react the way Adam Page bouncing off the stairs and landing chin first against the ring post made me react. One thing I've slightly overlooked is how Lance Archer, for one more night, got to be a fucking star. It's a shame he didn't carry this momentum for much of the year.
{4.25 stars & The King's Road Triumph award}
When Y2J lost the AEW title in 2020 it seemed to me that he would be closing the in-ring chapter of his career within 2 or 3 years. I was verrry wrong. He's had the best prowres year of his life as far as I'm concerned. I have a cynical tendency to hold Chris Jericho to the standards that both he and his fans insist he is at. A fair 75% of the time, he misses the mark that I would expect from a candidate for 'Greatest Of All Time'. This is one of the exceptions where he really hit a home run. The aforementioned cynic in me wants to hand it ALL to Eddie Kingston, but that wouldn't be fair. Jericho helped set up the dramatic heights of the bout just as much as Kingston helped in executing them. It was one of the closest 'duo-minded' matches you could see all year. I imagine both guys shared only a quick glance before walking to the ring, both knowing exactly how the match was gonna go.
{5 stars & The Most Cathartic award}
I simply cannot do this justice in such few words.
The feud between Punk and MJF was magical television. Every week was a highlight of ALL wrestlingI watched this year. Punk's promo where he invites Max to be. his. valentine. Followed of course by Friedman's promo where he reveals his 'origin story' of sorts, which is the undisputed best promo he's ever done. The feud was nothing too complex in the grand scheme of things, it's a grizzled veteran vs confident young guy story at its core... But it means a lot more to a gal like me who knows CM Punk's history. Someone who watched Punk as a kid and began to wonder what he was doing before he was in WWE. Learning about Punk's pre-WWE days invited me to find more Ring Of Honor matches online which inevitably led me to everything they had to offer. I found more about the American indies, I found New Japan and Pro Wrestling NOAH, I found my niche. And I can personally trace it all back to the time I learned that CM Punk pinned Austin Aries and then told a fable about an old man and a snake.
The match was pretty good too!
Acute satisfaction came from seeing MJF finally get his comeuppance by way of a flatback bump into thumbtacks. Thanks Wardlow, you sexy man!
{4.25 stars & The Better Than BOLA award}
(No, i didn't only watch AEW this year)
Every couple of years in pro wrestling you find that one. The one who just ticks all the boxes. "Speedball" Mike Bailey is that one for me. They just know how it all works. Couple them with someone who also happens to tick all those boxes and you get this match. These two had had a match for 2022's Battle of Los Angeles tournament, which was fine but I felt it went a bit longer than needed. Well I thought it did, but it turns out this match here is only 4 minutes shorter than their PWG match. The difference is night and day, although some of the moments are carried directly from that initial match. It's just a much better execution for the most part.
{4.5 stars & The Comedy Bullshit Award}
I love Jackass. I love Sami Zayn. You'd expect this to be an incompatible pairing, considering how explicit all of Jackass' content is, but the easy workaround is to have this match work as a straightforward comedy match rather than anything exceedingly violent. Let's not kid ourselves now, in what world would it be a good idea for Johnny Knoxville to have a legitimate pro wrestling match? He's had more concussions than Mick Foley.
The action is as competent as a WWE prop-comedy scene could've been. If it were Johnny Knoxville with anybody else then it wouldn't be on the list. Samuel Zayn is the patron saint of giving a hundred and ten percent.
{4.25 stars & The Bleedin' Gums award}
There are few ways to genuinely shine on TV when you've come up through the independents, even in AEW's world.
Most of the time, crowds are familiar enough with a talent so that they don't have to establish much more about themselves that isn't able to be seen online. Wheeler YUTA took things a step forward by not resting on his laurels and instead finding a new way to stand out. In this case, he gets promptly massacred by Jon Moxley. The amount of blood that flows from YUTA's head could fill a pool.
The one moment where he's face-up on the outside, face fully coloured in red, the money shot for Wheeler if there could've been one.
Mox don't slouch either, he puts up one of his best performances all year and that's saying a lot. The speed when he starts hitting those Hammer&Anvil Elbows is remarkable.
{4.25 stars & The Denzel Washington award}
This fight is a cult underground jazz record that was only on vinyl for 20 years and then inexplicably found its way to streaming after some weirdo celebrity found it and loved it.
I feel it aimless to analyse this match as a match, since it's portrayed as a gang fight that just so happens to be in front of a crowd.
We get a lot of wild moments throughout, my personal favourite being when Danny Garcia hits a Piledriver onto Ortiz or Santana from the apron onto stairs immediately after J.R says "Stop posing to the crowd, nobody's looking!"
I could list off all the cool moments but I'm more inclined to praise Eddie Kingston for a bit.
How is it possible for someone to feel so genuine when they are trying to light a man on fire while covered head to toe in another man's blood?
I'd like to stop for another second to show love to the owner of that blood, "Daddy Magic" Matt Menard. This fuckin guy bled like a Funk Brother and then covered himself in mustard with those cuts still fresh. What a madman.
{4.75 stars & The Best Sequel award}
yeahyeahyeah I know The Briscoes ain't the most jam-up guys in prowres, but they can still craft a fantastic match when they need to.
FTR are unfortunately in this negative space with fans right now, because Dax Harwood (FTR Bald) is being outspoken about things that aren't exactly popular or fun to talk about. I don't know why Cash Wheeler (FTR Not Bald) is getting flack too but that's only because I imagine when Dax isn't around him, he de-spawns from the area like a video game NPC.
My point is that these two teams made some magic with this match despite their inherent flaws as teams and as personalities.
Perhaps a bit of length could be cut and perhaps a hope spot or two could be removed, but dammit this is the kind of pulpy, high-stakes tag team wrestling I adore.
Plus I just love the 2/3 Falls stipulation. That was a big bonus for me.
(btw their first and third matches are great too but i like this one more)
{4.5 stars & The Marvel Movie award}
This match was unstable. (that's a joke)
Imagine the unsubtle and overproduced fighting in a Marvel Movie action scene and now imagine that being applied within the confines of a wrestling ring and voila you have this match.
WWE have this weird thing where they have main events for the world title feel complacent in their content. Roman is able to have a good/watchable match but only when he's with someone that he's wrestled before. He and Brock "Punches Moons Into Smaller Moons" Lesnar have had some stinkin' rotten no-good bouts before, just look at their match at WrestleMania this year!
There was no optimism from me nor my pals, whom I watched SummerSlam with, that this match would be worth a damn.
...
But then the tractor came out and the match shot from a solid 3.5 star snooze right to a 4.25 classic.
......
Then Austin Theory (yuck) got his SHIT ROCKED and it went up another quarter.
Sometimes it's worth giving the benefit of the doubt. You may just turn the night around in your favour.
{4.25 stars & Loud As F**K award}
I knew this match was good when Starlight Kid no-sold a Butterfly Suplex from the top and I had no qualms about it.
This match is a sleeper hit that comes right in the middle of a round robin tournament where nobody expects it.
Fast-paced and hard-hitting, two very common attributes for this promotion's best matches but quite bloody apt in this case. There's one bit where I swear Giulia's elbow pops out of place with how hard she swung it at SLK's jaw. It's no wonder both these wrestlers are my favs in all of STARDOM when they're this captivating in such a "throwaway" match during a Round Robin tournament.
{4.25 stars & The Welsh Irish Pride award}
This match is how to show you appreciation to the long-time star in Sheamus. Let him wrestle someone with no restrictions. Nothing but the hardest of hits and amplest of steps taken to get those hits in. This match is subtle for the longest time, waiting for a right moment for Gunther to get ruthless. If this were to be Big Gunth vs anybody else then it would probably open with one of his trademark CHOPS (in all caps), but they play it coy and they don't have Gunther hit Sheamus with a CHOP until a good few minutes in. And only from there do things escalate. The crowning moment being when Sheamus drops Gunther with the High Cross. A move that is always in Sheamus' moveset in the video games but one i've not seen him use since maybe 2011.
If Sheamus' legend status in WWE was in question before this match, then that debate was taken out back and kicked up the backside after the crowd's standing ovation.
{4.5 stars & The Bloody Tears award}
When it comes to deathmatches, I like to see men willingly bleed in pursuit of money and glory. Jun Kasai is one such man who has legitimately done that for 20 years. Look at his back and you'll see the shell of a tortoise. El Desperado is a New Japan star who I, admittedly, held in little regard beforehand but now i think i want to see this man succeed in every way possible.
Jun Kasai is comparable only to a decrepit deity with aspirations for mayhem and reverence for suffering. He takes all the worst ideas for wrestling moves and then makes them more brutal,
for a random example imagine a Canadian Destroyer. Right, you've seen one of those before?
Picture that move off the top rope now.
"Actually let's amp it up a bit and let's add a Double Underhook so then Despy can't protect his head on impact."
Oh! Okay then Mr. Kasai.
"Let's also add a stack of chairs so the aforementioned impact is a smidge more painful."
Whatever you say!
"That ain't the end of the match by the way."
Fine by me! Don't stab me, sir!!
It's a madman's match for sure.
It also gets a bit sentimental during the end-match promo, but i must declare that I was a little distracted that point because i had seen the best deathmatch of my damn life.
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That's my list!
I hope you'll want to watch some wrestling now.
- Rhlgull
dededos
prguitarman
2087
vaporwave
titsay