insomniac.

alex | studyblr + journalblr tracking: #riiusdesk

[modern-austen]

subtitles from Science Gossip, 1900

[langblr-xx]

HEY YOU!

Yeah, YOU. I’m talking to the aspiring polyglot that has taken a “break” and lost all motivation to study the language they still love.

This is a sign !

It’s 2021! A chance for a fresh start is here, ready for you to claim. Take this opportunity and turn your dreams into a reality!

We have all wanted to give up at some point, thought that our goals were out of reach. However, don’t let this phase become more than temporary! Push through today, just today, and motivation will blossom in the most unlikely of places!

Well, what are you waiting for? Go study!!

[jarofsharpies]

❄️ winter studying challenge ❄️ 3rd january

more stats on a sunday? it’s more likely than you think…

what is your aim for 2021?

honestly? just to graduate in one piece, maybe even (!) get a job/postgrad offer lmao

[lanaslaws]

studyblr intro!

hey everyone!

introduction:

my name is helena but most people call me lana

my pronouns are she/her

i turned 18 in november

i'm a scorpio sun, aries moon and capricorn rising. i’m also an infj-t and my enneagram type is 1! 

i'm from portugal

i’m a first year law student

interests: 

i read a lot

writing is an overwhelming passion for me

astrology

i play the ukulele (i’m still very new to it but so far it’s amazing)

i love to learn new languages. i speak portuguese, english and spanish fluently and i can understand some french and a tiny bit of greek!

i think that’s about it! i’m really hoping to get to know many of you and i hope this gives me the motivation i need! 

[owotime]

The holy trinity ❤

[visual-learning]

by nissistudies.

[alltruedreamersdied]

Dark Academia in STEM

Blackboards full of equations and chalk on your sleeve

Rummaging through your desk to find that one paper with that one reference you need, among mountains of other papers

Looking at old photographic plates of old telescopes

Wandering through empty corridors, looking at the busts of famous scientists

Drinking hot, black coffee on cold observation nights

Forgetting the time whilst working in the lab

Reading through and correcting the thesis of a friend who works in the same field as you

Getting distracted from work by a scientific discussion next to the coffee machine

Longing to read a novel, but having no time next to all the papers you have to read

Thick, expensive books on your desk, you don’t even dare to touch

Writing with one hand behind your back, it is already dark outside but you have not noticed because the lights are on and there are still more people around, just as you, deep in thought, silently discussing different theories 

Seeing two people at a blackboard, debating a problem, as more and more people join in to participate 

Notebooks filled with derivations and equations

Tea stains on the pages of the paper you have to read

Prints of the most important texts for your work covered in notes and highlights, the paper looking worn out

[pureenjoment]

Unorganized thoughts; equations written all over a whiteboard; black coffee; determination; cigarette breaks; messy hair; curiosity; not wanting to start and then not wanting to finish; double checking almost every calculation; old wooden desks; having anxiety attacks thinking about the meaning of life; not sharing most of your thoughts with anyone; frustration; appreciating the little things; re-reading the practise questions in hope for a new perspective; notebooks full of chaotic notes; dreams about discovering something new; 

[dumbassacademia]

all of my friends who i actually hang out with at school are STEM majors and most of them are largely exclusively STEM people which is fine and good and i think they’re super cool but it’s really funny when we’re all studying together bc it’s like *applying for early access to a biology research lab* *says “beautiful” while doing calculus problems* *talking happily about finding the decibel levels in each part of the library and reciting them from memory* *annotating shakespeare or a novel and putting off homework* and just 

take a guess about which one of those is me 

[metastablephysicist]

physics subfields but aesthetic

theory - Supersymmetry by Arcade Fire (alternatively: Symmetry by Wye Oak)

“When you ask what are electrons and protons I ought to answer that this question is not a profitable one to ask and does not really have a meaning. The important thing about electrons and protons is not what they are but how they behave, how they move. I can describe the situation by comparing it to the game of chess. In chess, we have various chessmen, kings, knights, pawns and so on. If you ask what chessman is, the answer would be that it is a piece of wood, or a piece of ivory, or perhaps just a sign written on paper, or anything whatever. It does not matter. Each chessman has a characteristic way of moving and this is all that matters about it. The whole game of chess follows from this way of moving the various chessmen.” – Paul A. M. Dirac

having competitions with your friends to see who can write the best Greek characters. staying up late working on code. rewarding yourself by using a piece of hagoromo chalk on the next problem, enjoying its smooth glide across the blackboard. breaking everything you touch in a physics lab. admiring the beautiful symmetry in and of the universe.

experiment- Default by Django Django or Glamorous Damage by GUM

“Measure what is measurable, and make measurable what is not so.” – Galileo Galilei

clean data with good statistics and high precision is manna from the gods. the image of oscilloscopes with fountains of wires spilling from them fills you with peace. spending extra time in the lab, not due to pressure from your PI, but because you’re so absorbed in your project. calling the peaks in your spectrum “little guys” and “big guys”. the feeling of finally taking usable measurements. you enjoy error propagation too much.

nuclear - Physics by Wild Front

When we have found how the nucleus of atoms is built up we shall have found the greatest secret of all—except life. We shall have found the basis of everything—of the earth we walk on, of the air we breathe, of the sunshine, of our physical body itself, of everything in the world, however great or however small—except life.  – Ernest Rutherford

repeatedly dispelling the notion that your work relates to warheads or power generation. absolutely losing it over football-shaped nuclei. having another emotional breakdown because ROOT decided it didn’t like the way you write in C++. all-nighters spent in the control room of the accelerator (during your only experiment this year!), consuming frightful amounts of caffeine and laughing deliriously with your group members. going home afterwards, sleeping deeply, then returning to the lab the next day to do it all over. respectfully simping for Maria Goeppert Mayer. 

astro/cosmology - Planets and Stars by Pavvla (or Dark Waves by Robot Koch)

“I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.” – Galileo Galilei

regularly stumbling as you walk home because you’re squinting at the barely visible Pleiades. your version of asmr is listening to the blip of a neutron star merger detected by LIGO. attending chilly community telescope nights in the hills outside your city, inviting children come up and peer into the refractor that you’ve angled at Jupiter. fervently explaining how we are the byproducts of stellar nucleosynthesis at a party. 

particle - Higgs Boson Blues by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds

Tapestries are made by many artisans working together. The contributions of separate workers cannot be discerned in the completed work, and the loose and false threads have been covered over. So it is in our picture of particle physics.” – Sheldon L. Glashow

dreaming of discovering a force carrier for gravity. or measuring neutrino mass. or observing dark matter. you get indignant when people claim your work is just fanfiction of the standard model, but only because it’s true. staying up late into the night thinking about the weirdness of discretized time and space. carrying your worn copy of the PDG particle physics booklet with you, just in case. hoping for accessible energy levels in the experiment you’re cooking up.

condensed matter - Quantum Physics by Ruby Waters (also Polychromatic by Castelle)

“No matter what you look at, if you look at it closely enough, you are involved in the entire universe.” – Michael Faraday

not only describing how matter behaves, but manipulating its behavior to suit your needs. teasing your nuclear friends about the practical applications of their research. the simultaneous mundanity and excitement surrounding the materials you study. setting up a miniature lab space in your kitchen and embracing the strange looks from your household. randomly finding transistors in the bottom of your bag or tucked into a pocket. being an absolute fanatic about microcontrollers, jerry-rigging pieces of lab equipment with them on the cheap.

please don’t take this as a prescription for your behavior; being a physicist isn’t about performing for others. it’s about gaining and creating new knowledge surrounding the behavior of the universe. if you enjoy that and want to immerse yourself in it, all the better :)

[likeshestoleit]

My one true love if we’re honest

[sprachtraeume]

rEaLLY fucking interesting how biology is the field in science with the highest percentage of women but also the most “looked-down-upon” and disregarded field of science by people (men) in other STEM fields. it’s almost as if those two facts might ( c o r r e l a t e )

[studyblr]

dark academia: stem + medicine

math: solving problems in the middle of the night, equations are written on the windowpane, quick calculations in your head, seeing mathematics as a secret language and barrier from the rest of the world, using probability theory to present a person’s life before their very eyes, understanding the algorithms governing every single step of „fate“ and how to manipulate them for your favor, cryptic notebooks, and lost alleyways

engineering: the power to create something that surpasses that is more than humans will ever be, governing and shaping the future of a whole civilization, late-night philosophizing on the nature and difference between humans and machines, crammed study sessions and tired blood-shot eyes

biology: extensive knowledge about herbology and toxicology, knowing almost every plant-based toxin and toxic mushroom in the local area, midnight at the lab with lowlights on and the dark hallways shrouded in mystery, glancing white lab-coats from the corner of your eye

chemistry: spending hours upon hours alone in the lab, perfecting formulas and conducting research because you just know the breakthrough is so close, sudden heureka moments in the middle of the night, inhaling new substances at secret meetings in old buildings to reach a state no human has reached before, prolonged shared eye contact and knowing smiles, the sound of a pen hastingly scribbling chemical formulas into a notebook

physics: „after all, murder is just the redistribution of matter, and matter is my specialty“, pointing out constellations in the sky, seeing patterns no one has seen before, wearing black turtlenecks and long coats while discussing quantum mechanics, hushed whispers, the melancholy of the endless search for another inhabitable planet, coffee cups left on the window sill

comp sci: the sound of typing at lightning speed, a lone screen glowing the absolute dark, losing track of time as you completely lose yourself in your code, trying again and again and again until it finally works, absolute dedication, crafting algorithms that can be used for good – but also for evil, code marathons isolating you from the rest of the world, being able to change lives at the press of a button

medicine: death looms always an inch too close, becoming as natural as life, white coats looming over the dissection table, staring at Rembrandt’s „the anatomy lessons of dr. nicholaes tulp“ in absolute awe, gloves covered in blood, syringes and needles in hand, hollowed laughter, being the last one in the library, knowing too well what sacrifice means

[moonlightchess]

I see a lot of dark academia aesthetic involving the classics fields, literature and languages and theater and music, but can the STEM kids get in on this too? Where’s my dark science aesthetic at? where’s my STEM gothic?

•  It has to be a mistake, on the syllabus your professor e-mailed over yesterday. The lab class can’t possibly start at 8pm. Not that you’d notice the time of night anyway, considering that for some reason it’s held in a basement of the STEM buildings that you were sure was closed off. You’ve never seen anyone emerging from its depths, and honestly you’re not even sure how to get down there. But not to worry, your professor assures you when you reply with your concerns. He’ll send his TA to pick you up. Just try not to stare at their hand. Especially if it sparks. They’re still working out the kinks.

• The transparent lightboard you use in your apartment building for working out math equations that require more room is the only illumination piercing your otherwise dim living room. You’ve been working for hours, and haven’t noticed how late it’s become, mostly because you’re pretty sure that you accidentally just determined exactly when the world is going to end. Before you can grab your phone to tell everyone, there’s a knock at your door. “Well done,” the man and woman in dark clothes and glasses that reflect even the minor light so that you can’t see your eyes as they enter your apartment. “A little too well done, we think. You’ll be coming with us now.”

•   H2 = H 2 0 [ Ωm(1+z) 3 +ΩDEexp {3 Z/z 0 dz 1+z [1+w(z)]}

•  “We are doctors,” in heart if not yet in degree,” the neurologist teaching your afternoon class says, laughing. “We are the ones who stand between that looming reaper Death and all of our patients, scalpels and syringes in hand, and say “not today, old friend. Not this one.” But then the mirth fades from his voice, and his gaze drifts to the left of the lecture hall for some odd reason, fixed on some dark corner. “That’s why it hates us, you know. Death. All of us. We as doctors must be very, very careful in our everyday lives, because Death despises us for stalling its work time and time again, and it constantly has its eyes on us. Waiting for us to relax, to look away. There are rituals, as we get older and Death steps closer every day…” but then they come back to themselves, shaking their heads and laughing. “Not enough coffee for me today, apparently!” Shadows in the corner where no one sits seem to be shifting.

•  The chemistry majors always seem to know something that no one else does. They all keep tiny glass bottles of clove oil in their backpacks at all times, for some reason. You’re starting to wonder if it wouldn’t be smart for you to do the same.

•  The engineering majors know exactly what the chem majors think only they know, and they laugh when you mention the clove oil. “They really think that will protect them,” one future robotics pioneer says to you, shaking his head. “They really think they can stop what’s coming.”

•  Something in the forensics lab whispers at night, but only when a lone student is working down there alone. One of them snags you in the halls one morning and says, “I know you’re not forensics and you’ve never heard it before, but last night I was working on a paper down there and, well. It knows your name.”

• Your roommate is a biogenetics student. She keeps beakers brimming with bubbling fluids in the fridge, and she often seems restless and distracted. You’ve caught her stealing hair off of your brush before, and one night as you watch her mixing and stirring and taking notes as she’s hunched over her desk, you realize that a single blinking eyeball is staring back at you from the green fluid surrounding it in her glass tube.

•  The mathematics students have figured out what the chemistry students know, and what the engineering students have known for years. They all look anxious now, walking around campus and constantly looking over their shoulders. One of them suggests to you that maybe you should start stockpiling bottled water. Just in case.

•  An astronomy major comes barreling into one of your classes one dim and dying afternoon, slapping a star chart down onto a desk in front of a newly enlightened mathematics student, sweating and furious. “You weren’t even going to tell us, you bastard?! You were just going to let it happen while we sat around unprepared?!”

•  A week later. You sit up in bed and your roommate is gone. Their things are gone. Campus is still and quiet, the chem and engineering and astronomy and mathematics students having all cleared out save for you. The bio, forensics, and med students are left blinking, dazed. Clearly you’ve all missed something important, but your roommate responds to your text with assurance that it’s fine. You’ll all know soon enough.

[etherea1ity]

Oh to live in a little cottage on top of a mountain beside the sea

[aradhels]

gryffindor: bonfires, dancing alone in your room at midnight, coffee stains, steaming showers, can be a bit socially awkward, licorice, jean jackets, photograph sessions with friends, road trips, sunrises, animal lovers

hufflepuff: determined, leather jackets, earphones, works hard and smart, sarcastic smirks, treats people with kindness, blasting music, respects rules, constantly sends memes to their friends, not afraid to stand up for what’s right

ravenclaw: inspired by nature, scrunchies, bullshits an entire essay and still gets a high grade, really messy, oversized hoodies, artistic, goes to coffee shops for the aesthetics, loves reading fantasy books, street smart, random facts

slytherin: very emotional but doesn’t show it, houseplants, old cottages in the woods, probably an artist, cries during sad movie scenes but won’t admit it, loves hiking in the forests, greek mythology, easily embarrassed, sharp minded

[trinitysbooks]

illegible handwriting, coffee rings on notebooks, putting gloves on only to take them off again, dark lipstick, maurice (1987), walking to class when it’s not raining enough for an umbrella but just enough to fog up your glasses, stone buildings, leaves that aren’t quite crunchy, deadlines, pen smudges, leaving class only to find out its dark outside, cinnamon, cold noses, swaying trees, half moons, cuffed sleeves, silence