Shit PetSmart Customers Say
“I want that one specific fish” Like okay for most fish I can deal with this request but some little girl the other day told me three specific neon tetras that she wanted. NEON TETRAS. I just looked at her like lol no and her mom tried to compromise by saying “how about one medium and two large ones?” I said okay but tbh I just grabbed three random ones because they are all EXACTLY THE SAME
“I’d like some (insert fish here)” “Alright how many?” “A couple” A couple? You do realize you pay per fish so it is pertinent that I get and write down the correct number of fish. So then I’ll say “soo..like..?” and some gems will continue to reply with shit like “I don’t know? A few?”
“Can I put this giant ass koi fish in a 10 gallon tank?” “No” “But why?” Even when I explain issues with size, waste management, and oxygen, people never understand why they can’t put large fish or a crapton of small ones in a tiny tank. And then they get mad at me like I’m fucking lying lol
“Do you sell puppies/dogs?” I literally want to gouge my eyes out when I hear this, and I typically hear it at least every time I work. I of course say, “No, but we do have adoption events on Saturdays!” Some leave it at that, but there are always the few that are like “Oh, why don’t you sell any?” and I have to say “Oh because there are thousands of homeless dogs so we don’t support breeding” as politely as possible. And then the REALLY lovely people respond with, “Oh well then where can I buy a puppy?”
“Where is the (insert product here)?” when they are standing literally right by it.
“My animal is having this complex medical issue, can you, a college aged associate making 8.50/hr, tell me exactly how to solve this?” SEE A VET
“This pin pad asks too many questions” or “These prices are too high.” ??? Do you think I can change things like this ???
“Can I have a discount for some unbelievably stupid reason?”
Me: “Hi, welcome to PetSmart!” Them: looks at me blankly, says nothing, and then continues on their way.
That customer who stands there reading their receipt making sure every single item was the correct price, even when there is a line behind them
Incredibly stupid animal questions like “You sell crickets as pets??” or “What?? Rodents smell/poop a lot?” or “You feed the snakes actual mice?”
Customer sees me, holding snake calmly and freely: “Wait, aren’t you scared of that?” ??? Obviously not ???
Me: “Would you like to donate a stuffed animal to a child in need?” Them: “oh no I already did it the other day :)” mhmm sure you did :)
Customers coming in 3 minutes before closing, not just to grab something quickly and get out, but to freaking make me GET FISH.
Leashes and collars aisle. Enough said.
And of course, the worst, sexual harassment and offensive speech in general.
