from The Tops Of Tall Trees In Decent

[riverbarlowe]

guau guau

[riverbarlowe]

bark bark

[riverbarlowe]

GOT PHONE CALL ME 218 390 5907

[riverbarlowe]

SWEET BaBbY got a house ! Not all to me but can you help me decorate my room like you like it plz all witchy in shit or however I just want it cozy

[riverbarlowe]

HELL YEAH!!!!!!!! Nice (: Where is it? How many people? Details? I cant wait to help you make it all cozy <3

Ooo btw I got updates for you!!

I got approved for extra unemployment payments and I think I am going to get 1500 in a few days or a week or two! Unless they distribute it out by 5 payments at a time. So then I can get a new phone and stuff and fix my car so I can come see you more !! (: also I am 4 and a half days free of alcohol, cigs, and drugs! Including adderalls. But I think i will start taking them again after a month

[riverbarlowe]

SWEET BaBbY got a house ! Not all to me but can you help me decorate my room like you like it plz all witchy in shit or however I just want it cozy

[riverbarlowe]

When when details details!!

[riverbarlowe]

HEY! I am comign to see you on MONDAY :D

[riverbarlowe]

4:05

Jordyn I’m so so proud to hear you say that. I’ll do it too. It sounds fun. At least a quit from tobacco temp for me. It nice to read your words again. God I miss you very much and I feel like with your words your one step closer to me. In terms of this weekend I’d love to come up. I don’t think I’d get sick. Maybe call me sometime and we can work plans out together? (: you are k@@l

[riverbarlowe]

I will call you today!

[riverbarlowe]

I feel very alone and stupid.

[riverbarlowe]

why?

[riverbarlowe]

I feel very alone and stupid.

[riverbarlowe]

4:05

Jordyn I’m so so proud to hear you say that. I’ll do it too. It sounds fun. At least a quit from tobacco temp for me. It nice to read your words again. God I miss you very much and I feel like with your words your one step closer to me. In terms of this weekend I’d love to come up. I don’t think I’d get sick. Maybe call me sometime and we can work plans out together? (: you are k@@l

[riverbarlowe]

Thats so cool (: You dont have to feel insecure, I LOVE your broad shoulders, I think they make you look sexy. If i’m not sick still you should come this weekend! We can make a plan. You could take me back with you, maybe! Depends on how I am feeling, I dont want to get you sick. Also btw I made a huge decision, I am going sober, and yesterday was my first day. I am quitting alcohol/drugs/even tobacco. It makes me sick to think about the kind of person I am while I use. My friend Elise from Wisconsin invited me to her Virtual AA meeting with her over zoom last night with people from alll around the country like Washington DC and NY NY. 12:39 sept 2

[riverbarlowe]

the 1st of September 9:12PM

I made a yummy veggie dish tonight. Today was okay. Got some clothes at Walmart (including a whip ass gossip girl T-shirt) I really miss you. I want to see you this weekend :/ other than that just keeping you in my thoughts and sending genuine love. Was daydreaming about fun make believe scenarios for the future. Simple cool little shit. Whatev 🍏

Hey I don’t know why that screenshot got added to this post I don’t know how to remove. Anyway I love you.

P.S feeling so insecure about my broad shoulders atm. I’ve always been insecure about them. oh well. Just wants to share because relatability and stuff

[riverbarlowe]

2:42 Monday

I’m feeling so sad today Jdot. I feel stupid for being sad and I don’t know why. I have an idea as to why but not certain. We rehearsed today (me and Kyle) and it was fine; short. Got a new song in we are going to release as a single. I think it was just being at our rehearsal space. So many painful memories I want gone. So many faces associated with that place I just wish I could easily erase. A lot of people in the music scene whether it be emily or various bands. Music is hard for me. It’s what I do but god is it painful. It’s just fucking painful. I do it because right now I think I can inspire fellow underdogs like myself and truthfully it’s all I give a shit about. It’s what I always wanted. But it comes at what cost? I don’t know. Again music is just art. It hurts. I don’t want to go back to the old world. Right now sitting on kyle’s couch trying to dream up a positive new world. Trying everything I can

I think about you everyday you know. In sweet romantic ways alongside just wanting to feel like I have a true friend in this world. You feel like a true friend to me. And I wish you could just be near me all the time because when I’m with you it’s just about as good as it gets for me I think. Nevertheless I push on. Hopefully get moved into new place tomorrow. We’ll see. My grandfather cane up. He knows I’m down and out and wants to help me. I appreciate that because I’m flat broke and my family dynamic is just a disaster anyway. But then I always find myself complaining about things I shouldn’t. He’s a nice guy but he’s so eccentric and it’s hard. All I want is a simple good living. I’m fighting. I’m fighting

Anyway I hope you get better and I hope this doesn’t bum you out too much. You are in my thoughts. I’m completely Jordyn loyal and I hope to make you feel secure in having me in your thoughts too

[riverbarlowe]

a poem for sick Jdot

a crystal smitten hits the dirt

unravels in supposed unearthly decomposings unforgiving

and to it I offer images golden reprise

of sunflowers gazed in nightly fire trials

of acts on fate’s whim in longed internal cleansings

not only of past but futures to be

as many golden visions await

if can be helped my collected me’s

two me’s specific

a crystal is in

At aid is mine me

May you bloom in sooner showers possible

[riverbarlowe]

I love you and so bad miss you too.

I am still v sick. I need to get tested for covid. Thats cool to hear about yr mum! Wishing I could be watching that documentary with you guys. Feeling dizzy. as soon as i see ari i will try to call u. <3 my favorite d

[riverbarlowe]

Sweet lady 10:32am

Sitting on kyle’s couch sending you smashing levels of love I want Jdot healthy

Also just wanted to say I think you are extremely special. You are very much yourself in mine eye and I think it’s so beautiful.

7:20pm sitting with Kyle watching documentary on band go-gos that I love. Found out today my mom got a job as a IT communications teacher in a high school. Trying to teach anatomy in said high school in Keller Texas. Happy for her. Miss you and honestly love you. Stay Jdot.