World’s #1 Cop Hater @robomartyr - Tumblr Blog

My schedule this week:

-6am wake up

-humiliate myself in front of a jury from 8-4

-Rihanna voice work work work work work from like 6pm-1am

-finally go to bed at 3am

Unfortunately for me, and even more unfortunately for my wife, what I am learning from this is that I actually LOVE this schedule. I literally feel fine. I smell burnt toast pretty much constantly but until I have a seizure I’m not concerned about it

robomartyr

FWIW I usually go to bed at 11 and wake up between 5 and 7. But it turns out you can go to bed at 3 and wake up at 6 and it’s literally fine

My schedule this week:

-6am wake up

-humiliate myself in front of a jury from 8-4

-Rihanna voice work work work work work from like 6pm-1am

-finally go to bed at 3am

Unfortunately for me, and even more unfortunately for my wife, what I am learning from this is that I actually LOVE this schedule. I literally feel fine. I smell burnt toast pretty much constantly but until I have a seizure I’m not concerned about it

persianmom-deactivated20260602

#🩷#also prev

I feel like someone invited me over to play basketball with their friends but they didn’t tell me their friends were Michael Jordan, Kobe, and Larry Bird and also it’s Death Basketball

I 🩷 working a 19 hour day and leaving the office at 2am

swampthing07

steveyockey

affirmations they will not kill me at work today. it is not in my job description to get killed. if they did kill me at work that would be weird and probably not worth it for them

#someone please make sure the jury knows this

souvenirs

I minored in French in college so hearing other lawyers say voir dire is excruciating

If any of you are ever in my jury pool you have to promise to say that you know me and you can’t be fair and impartial. I’m sorry. I hate to encourage you to get out of jury duty but it’s only in this ONE specific case

#I hate jury selection. today was a nightmare #and the nightmare will continue tomorrow