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TYPES OF FEMALE DOMINATES

Female Dominate

Female dominance (femdom) refers to a BDSM scene or relationship in which a female is a dominant partner or top partner. A dominant female may have a number of different names, including a Dominatrix, Mistress or Madame. Female dominants often engage in BDSM activities such as bondage, ball busting, humiliation, face sitting, forced feminization, forced chastity, forced orgasm, and pegging. While femdom is specific to BDSM, any woman can give her partner a thrill by donning a corset and some stilettos and throwing a little female domination into the mix. Before engaging in any BDSM play, however, make sure that all players consent to the activities and follow all safety guidelines, particularly the use of a safe word.

Domme

One who asserts control or authority over another; the person in charge of a scene or play. A title for a Top, declaring a role one takes or wishes to take in a BDSM scene or sexual act. A female Dominant, it is mostly used as the title of a person engaging in or wishing to engage in an act where she takes on the role of the Dominant. (The difference between Domme’s and game players: A Domme creates the hunger, the need and the want in the one they want to dominate. A game player just looks for anyone that is hungry for them to dominate.)

Femdom Mistress

Is where a woman fills a very strong and demanding role and exhibits strong gender role reversals. Males are usually large and more dominant in the natural world. Femdom is a demonstration of the strength of the woman and usually one of the more abusive dominants. Femdom is not only directed to men, but many times can include women in the submissive role, but almost always the Mistress assumes the male role even to sexual acts.

Mistress

A title/term for those that “live” as a Domme. A woman who rules others or has control over something. ( May also like to bark orders and watch you jump. ) In a BDSM scene, a mistress is a female dominant, or dominatrix, in a top/bottom relationship. The term is the female version of the term “master,” which refers to a male dominant. Consenting male and female submissives may be under the control of a mistress, who will often require that they perform any tasks she requests, including sexual activities. If a submissive is disobedient or does not please a mistress, the submissive may be punished. In BDSM literature, dominant terms, including “mistress” and “master,” are capitalized when written, while submissive terms, like “slave,” are not. The same is true when writing a dominant or submissive’s given name. This is done out of respect and honour for the dominant.

Poly Domme

This Domme can literally love more than one submissive at a time and always has the best interests of all of her submissives at heart. She may be a combination of all of the other Dommes listed here and her subs will reflect that. (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH A COLLECTOR)

Ritual and Protocol Dominant

A Domme who’s very pragmatic and likes concrete, tangible outcomes may favour rituals and protocols. They’re the kind of Dominant who might be able to step into the role of Empress…expecting you to simply hang around and be available for use. They are aware of subtle details in your appearance, attire, and demeanour and are likely to be very aware of body language during a scene.

S.A.D. - Smart Ass Domme

Also known as a Brat Domme. They like to poke, joke, and generally playful. They are known to do/say things such as The submissive begs to cum, the Domme looks perplexed and says “silly, you are already here.” “like seriously, if I wasn’t tied down….” This is some of the most fun Dommes to be around if you like to joke and are playful.

Sadistic Domme

The Sadistic Domme gets off on inflicting pain on you. MUCH pain. typically into some pretty heavy BDSM stuff, they are not for the weak of heart. During a scene, they will use and abuse you CONSENSUALLY and then afterwards if you find a good Domme, will do amazing aftercare and let you know how wonderful you are. There are four main types of Sadists. Emotional, Mental, Physical, and Sensual. A Domme may be any combination of these. From only one type to all four.

Strict Domme

They have standards they live by and will impose them on you. They like things done their way, no other way will be accepted. They manage their own lives smoothly, with to do lists which they often place before anything else. They have a solid sense of order and routine

Sexual Domme

Everything with them is sexual. Going out in public? put in an anal plug. Have to go to work today? don’t wear any underwear. I am coming over later? You better be naked on the floor and horny when I arrive. Everything is about sex.

The Submissive Collector

Tend to be ones who collect slaves, house and treat them like animals. They also have large groups but typically not treated as a family but rather a herd. They enjoy animal play and dehumanization to the fullest extent. (NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH A POLY DOMME)

True/Real Domme/Mistress/Top

It has nothing to do with quality and technical knowledge doesn’t make for experienced. To call oneself true/real implies that any other form of dominance is less or false. There is no right or wrong way to be a Domme/Top/Master/Mistress, it depends on the desires of those involved.

Mommy Dommes

Are usually mature individuals who like to have young people assume the role of daughter or son. This is a relationship found on the extension and evolution of a “positive" incestuous relationship. Many times light discipline (spanking) and other forms of home “play” is included. but don’t let the title caregiver, mommy, or daddy fool you when you find a proper caregiver Dom they will show you who’s boss. They often engage in plays such as cg/l (caregiver//little) where you will mostly see ddlg (daddy dom/little girl) but there are also mdlg (momma dom/little girl), ddlb (daddy dom/little boy), mdlb (mommy dom/little boy), cglb (caregiver/little boy), cglg (caregiver/little girl) and any combination of these. They enjoy taking care of their submissive and disciplining them when they break a rule. In the world of BDSM role-play, a mommy is a dominant female figure who acts as another partner’s mother. More specifically, it is a type of age play in which a woman pretends to be an older woman taking care of her much younger child. The submissive partners in these relationships are often referred to as “littles.” During play, mommies may punish their littles in various ways, such as by spanking, or nurture them, such as by cuddling with them.

Age play and role-playing as a mommy is not related to paedophilia in any way, contrary to what some may believe. Individuals who have mommies or act as mommies are also typically not interested in incest either. This relationship is more about dominance and submission, as well as recreating the emotions and experiences of childhood.

Caring Dommes

They care about you, genuinely. Everything they do, They have Their sub’s best interest at heart. They try their best to be sweet AFTER a scene but do not piss a caring Domme off. that is a huge mistake. They can usually snap within an instant. Not necessarily into any kinks or anything else, They just want to see Their sub succeed and will do everything they can to see it happen.

Dominatrix/Pro-Domme

Usually, a professional that charges for their service. Does not include sex. A ProDomme is a woman who can be hired to perform BDSM services. “Domme” is feminized version of the word “Dom” which is used to refer to the dominant partner in a dominant/submissive BDSM pairing. ProDommes frequently get categorized alongside prostitutes when, in actuality, they typically focus exclusively on BDSM practices and do not engage in sex acts with clients.

A ProDomme typically conducts sessions consisting of BDSM “scenes” or roleplays in a dungeon or other such space that is dedicated for such a use. Depending on the nature of a scene, it may be possible to conduct it remotely via email, phone, or web cam. It is not uncommon for a ProDomme to develop a long-term relationship with a client. In this relationship, she may develop an understanding of their client’s fetishes and even their psychological needs.

Financial Domination (FinDom)

Financial domination (FinDom) refers to being a financial slave. It is most commonly seen between a willing male submissive and a female dominatrix. It is a fetish that involves being humiliated or demeaned by a financial dominatrix (also referred to as fin-dom), in exchange for money or gifts. It does not necessarily involve sex. It is said to have stemmed from the observations and eventual practice of Miss Marx, a professional dominatrix, who saw how some men get an instant hard-on when handing woman money. She exploited this reaction and eventually began a cult fetish.

The subject of financial domination is often referred to as a money pig. The act of extorting money or gifts from people is referred to as money slavery or wallet rape. Extortion happens through verbal abuse and sometimes consensual blackmail. A man who willingly subjects himself to this abuse is said to justify it by describing women as worthy of his servitude. Fulfilling this desire may be okay if one has enough cash to spare. However, that money might be better off used to pay for a therapist should this fetish affect day-to-day function and other people.

Little Domme

A dominant who is also little. Littles are not exclusively submissive. There are many littles who are Dominants, just as there are caregivers who are subs. (I personally have a friend who is a Little Domme.)

Owner

A term used for those that “live” as an Owner of their property (usually slaves refer to theirs as their owner) Owner is a term for an individual who has accepted complete responsibility for another individual in the BDSM world. An owner may have ownership of a person identifying as a slave or as a pet. Despite the connotations of these words, slaves and pets generally enter into a relationship with an owner voluntarily and are free to leave at any time.

An owner governs all aspects of the slave or pet’s behaviour, dress, and punishments. These will typically be spelt out in a contract between the owner and the slave or pet prior to any activity between them. For example, an owner may stipulate that a “pet pony” always wears a bridle and hoof boots. The owner of a female slave may insist she always wears short skirts when clothed, for example, or that she never wears underwear. Owners are responsible for administering punishments when their pet or slave steps out of line. Conversely, owners are also in charge of pampering slaves or pets to reward good behaviour. Punishments and rewards may be an element of training, which owners are also responsible for administering during daily life. An owner may give a pet or slave a collar to wear as a symbol of the relationship. A pet or slave may also take on a name given to them by the owner to symbolize their new life under the owner’s control.

Switch

A switch is a person involved in BDSM play who chooses to play either a dominant or submissive. Partners may switch roles just because they want to, or to experience different activities. In a relationship between two people who identify as the same BDSM orientation, switching provides a way for both people to meet their BDSM needs. Switches may be looked down on by some people in their community for not being able to make up their minds.

In most BDSM play, one person takes on the role of the dominant, while the other plays a submissive. Being a switch means that a person can reverse rolls. Not everyone likes to be dominant or submissive all the time, and switching can afford the opportunity for partners to experience new sensations and levels of trust in one another. Most switches have been on the BDSM scene for a long time, have played both roles, and are confident in what they want out of a scene.

Domina

Domina is one of several possible titles for a female Dominant. It can be a self-proclaimed title, or it can be the honorific a submissive partner uses to address their top/Dominant. Although less common than the term Mistress, Domina is a popular title in the kink and BDSM scene. It is used to refer to a female Dominant partner.

Governess

In earlier times, governesses were viewed as teachers and disciplinarians. Today, the strict and punitive character of governesses are now a sexual fetish. Governesses were usually young, unmarried women in their early 20s or 30s who were employed as an authority figure over young children and young adults. Victorian-age governesses are often heavily connected to the Anglo-Saxon obsession and lust over flagellation. Bad behaviour was often corrected by a good spanking with young pupils learning how to bare their bottoms and assume the position for punishment. Today, the governess is a figure of fantasy in BDSM and erotica. The seemingly repressed and demure nature of the governess was commonly viewed in earlier literature as a form of sexual attractiveness. The youthfulness and supposed innocence of the governess was both attractive to the pupil and the employer. To the young student, the mature governess represented an older, mature sexual fantasy under which the governess had full control. To the employer, a submissive/dominant relationship existed between the two. The employer was often one of means and power whereas the governess often lacked finances and made a small living meaning that the employer often would be dominant over the governess. Modern erotica now explicitly describes the sexual seduction or relationships between governesses and young women and men.

Hotwife

A hotwife is an attractive married woman who has sexual relationships with other men, typically with the consent of her husband. This is commonly known as a cuckold. These women are sexually uninhibited and enjoy sex, both with their husband and with other partners. They enjoy the freedom and attention that comes with their lifestyle. A hotwife may also be called a slutwife. Usually, a hotwife’s husband is involved in her sexual dalliances in some way. Often he will join in, forming a threesome, or he will simply watch his wife having sex with someone else. These husbands are usually aroused by their wives interactions, but also motivated by their partners’ happiness.

However, there is a growing number of hotwives who pursue other men without their husband’s knowledge. These women may dress provocatively and flirt with other men while their husbands are around, laying the groundwork for extramarital affairs when their husbands are out of sight. Many hotwives wear an anklet as a public display of availability. This piece of jewellery is designed to show men that a married woman is sexually available, whether it’s with or without her husband’s consent. There are a number of online blogs where hotwives and their partners share their sexual exploits and fantasies. There are also blogs containing images and gifs of other hotwives, or models who could be hotwives, designed to appeal to people living or fantasizing about the hotwife lifestyle.

Double/Triple Domme

Double and triple domme sessions are BDSM-style sessions which involve one submissive client and more than one dominant participant known as dominatrixes or dommes. A double domme session sees a single client interacting with two dommes while a triple domme session involves one client and three Dommes. For clients who book double and triple domme sessions being teased, tortured, and tormented by more than one skilled domme multiplies their arousal and pleasure. Double and triple domme sessions may be arranged with professional masters or mistresses. These sex workers generally have a good relationship with one another and an understanding of their special talents and practices which helps enhance the experience for their clients. Some double and triple domme sessions involve general BDSM practices while some focus on specific kinks such as sessions with foot fetish mistresses, kidnapping scenes, or lesbian cuckolding scenes.

Masturbatrix

A Masturbatrix is a term used to describe a female dominatrix that specializes in the masturbation of their partner. In most situations, the Masturbatrix will deny or delay the orgasm. A Masturbatrix is similar to a dominatrix in that it involves a female who provides consensual teasing and torture of the other person in a sexual way. The Masturbatix often teases the other person during masturbation and denies sexual climax. The Masturbatrix might use different techniques to tease and arouse during masturbation, including different elements of BDSM play.

Humiliatrix

A humiliatrix is a specific type of female dominatrix that is particularly skilled in the art of humiliation. A humiliatrix might be skilled in either sexual/ erotic humiliation, or in real-life humiliation. A humiliatrix differs from a traditional dominatrix in that a dominatrix inflicts physical pain on the sexual partner while a humiliatrix inflicts psychological suffering. A humiliatrix might blackmail their partner, inflict stress, and mental anguish. She may also use physical humiliation techniques like face-slapping and spitting.

Keyholder (KH)

Keyholder is a term for an individual who holds the key to a chastity device. The keyholder has a position of great power, one that is often taken on by a dominant person in a BDSM relationship. Keyholders can be of any gender or sexuality, but most commonly, they tend to be heterosexual women who hold the keys to a male chastity device. The term keyholder is often shortened to the acronym KH. Because a keyholder controls access to a chastity device, they also by extension control the genitals of their partner. The keyholder controls whether the person wearing the chastity device can achieve sexual gratification and even has an impact on how and when they urinate and shower.

Many keyholders enjoy wearing the keys to the chastity device on a necklace. The visibility of the keys while hanging around one’s neck reinforces the relationship between the keyholder and the wearer of the chastity device, reminding the submissive of the keyholder’s power. Keyholders should respect the power they have and never abuse it. It’s important for keyholders to act within the boundaries established before the chastity device is put into place. These boundaries may include specifications about the length of time the keyholder will keep the keys and enforce chastity and whether the keyholder will make the submissive work for his or her freedom. Keyholders typically use the duration of their position to “train” their submissive to be a better and less selfish lover.

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION

Sensual Domination

Sensual domination is a new style of dominance which focuses on delighting all of the senses. When practising sensual domination, both partners agree to take turns assuming and giving up control so they can both enjoy sexual pleasure. Sensual dominance celebrates pleasure over pain and does not involve violence, aggression, or humiliation. Despite refraining from many common domination methods, a sensual dominant still aims to bring their submissive partner to subspace. As it’s easier for a submissive partner shifts out of pain than pleasure, sensual dominance often results in a longer period of subspace.

Sensual dominance is often seen as soft or mild dominance. Many of the tools of a sensual dominant are familiar to those used by vanilla couples dabbling in BDSM, such as blindfolds, oils, ropes, ice cubes, and feathers. Sensual dominance may also involve role play and a foot or shoe worship. The submissive partner is treated with reverence and praised rather than put down or humiliated. While mild pain may be involved in sensual dominance, it is never the focus of these kinds of scenes. Any pain administered is meant to complement the pleasure and never intended to push the submissive’s limits.

Sensual dominance can help couples experience greater sensual freedom and intimacy. Many practitioners of sensual dominance feel this style of domination requires more skill than traditional domination, as it requires more patience and a greater understanding of a submissive’s turn-ons and state of mind. Open communication before a play session can help make things more enjoyable for all participants. While sensual dominance is seen as a fairly mild form of dominance, it’s still a good idea to employ a safeword to ensure the interaction never takes the submissive out of their comfort zone.

Female Cuckold

The female cuckold, also known as cuckquean, is a female who derives sexual pleasure from looking at her partner (usually, but not exclusively, male) have sex with another person. As the cuckolding fetish is considered masochistic, it is considered a BDSM fetish. A female cuckold is a submissive woman who derives masochistic pleasure by looking at her partner have sex with another person. The pleasure comes from the humiliation and the mental anguish caused by the knowledge that your committed partner is enjoying another person more than you. Some theorize that cucks eroticize psychological humiliation.

Cuckolding is different from swinging or threesomes in that the cuckolded person does not participate. It requires a certain level of commitment between the two original partners, as, without an emotional connection, humiliation does not occur at the same level. Many cuckqueans are married. One apparent difference between male cuckolds and cuckqueans is that while cuckolds focus on the pleasure of their wives, cuckqueans tend to focus on the pleasure of the woman her partner is having sex with.

Cuckcake

A cuckcake is a female “bull” in an alternative form of cuckolding where the bull and at least one other participant are female. This involves a subset of cuckolding called cuckqueaning where at least two of the participants are female. A traditional cuckolding scene usually consists of a hetero couple with the man being submissive, and the woman dominant. Another submissive man, the “bull” has sex with the dominant female partner, often in front of the submissive (referred to in this case as the cuckold) while he is left helpless.

In a cuckqueaning scene the equivalent to the bull is female called a cuckcake. The submissive, or cuckquean, is consensually forced to watch the cuckcake have sex with the submissive cuckquean’s partner who can be either male or female.

Cuckqueen

A cuckqueen is a woman who is aroused by her partner engaging in sexual activity with another partner. The pleasure derived from the activity is masochistic in nature and might include a humiliation component. The term cuckqueen is derived from the term cuckold which traditionally means a man whose wife is adulterous. In this instance, the meaning varies slightly because the partner in question is not being deceived and is, in fact, complicit in the activity.

Cuckold

Cuckold, when used in a fetish context, describes the fetish of men who find masochistic pleasure in watching their wives have sex with other men. The man is complicit in the infidelity and often helps arrange the meetings. The couple need not necessarily be married, but there needs to be some kind of commitment between the two. As a fetish, cuckolding is a form of mental masochism that mostly involves mental humiliation. In a typical encounter, the woman has sex with another man while her husband watches. The husband is, of course, aware and willing. This lack of participation, this feeling of being left out, is what many cuckhold fetishists enjoy. Another aspect of the cuckholding fetish is competition. Some psychosexual theories claim that men will desire their wives more if they’ve just had sex with another man because this allows the men’s sperm to compete. While this theory is not widely accepted, some cuckholding fetishists feel this aspect applies to them. Cuckhold fetishism can exist along a wide variety of other BDSM-related activities, such as female dominance, voyeurism, denial and verbal humiliation. Cuckholding is different from swinging (there is not another woman to have sex with the husband) and threesomes (because the husband doesn’t participate). While their power should not be abused, key holders are also responsible for disciplining their submissives should they act out or break the rules while wearing chastity devices. Discipline could involve spanking, taking away privileges, or other deterrents for bad behaviour.

Clothed Female, Naked Male (CFNM)

Clothed female, naked male (CFNM) refers to a scenario, usually sexual in nature, in which a female is wearing clothes and a male is not. Clothed female, a naked male is a common theme in female domination, or femdom, scenarios. Being completely naked in front of a clothed dominant female helps emphasize the male’s vulnerability and submission as well as the female’s control. While the male is naked, the female is free to participate in a number of sexual acts, including erotic humiliation, erotic teasing, pegging, cock-and-ball torture and bondage. Clothed female, a naked male may be portrayed in erotic literature as well as pornographic movies and pictures. This term is often referred to by its acronym, CFNM, in the BDSM scene. You don’t have to be deep into the BDSM scene nor do you have to be an experienced dominatrix to introduce clothed female, naked male scenarios in the bedroom.

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