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@ruchikaplay-blog
Purpose of Pain
As an empath, I sometimes struggle to speak my truth in relationships.
I’m aware that speaking up means conflict. Though my adjustment seems outwardly seamless, I noticed in recent relationship dynamics that I was trying to numb myself with unhealthy foods.
Subsequent to a period of days of avoiding speaking up and eating in a way that didn’t nurture my body, I sat down for meditation and felt a…
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Outer Calamities and Inner Quandaries
Outer Calamities and Inner Quandaries
Recent events have me thinking about the fires and hurricanes, calamities of nature. Also, thinking of the masculine and feminine, power and pain that also is coming up to be healed. I’m feeling my heart that seems solid and in some ways being a witness as my own process is taking me into expansion these days. Inner judgments arise because I think I should be feeling more compassion. Because…
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Conscious Woman Dating
Dating as a conscious woman comes with its own perks and challenges. So many women on the spiritual path struggle with the feeling of divide between their spiritual path and dating. This sense of divide is real in many aspects. Often, we aren’t exposed to dating and relationships models that truly embody the type of relationships that are in line with our spiritual growth and evolution.
In order…
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The Self Improvement Myth
The Self Improvement Myth
There is a myth in our culture that we need to effort to become better people. Or better workers. Or have better relationships. Essentially, many of us don’t feel worthy or good enough, giving rise to numerous self help programs for low self-esteem.
We can also become attached to our self image which is unworthy or unlovable. When we encounter messages from the external world that match our self…
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Significance of Our Soul Family
Significance of Our Soul Family
Spiritual teachings often speak about the importance of sangha or soul family. There seem to be more and more young people negotiating being in this world with their gifts and a connection with the divine that is more organic, rather than seeking the divine through pain and experiencing contrast. Others of us have found our connection and motivation to reach for the divine from a place of pain,…
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The Value of Grief
The Value of Grief
We live in a culture where we are all in ‘pursuit of happiness’. The subtle and powerful beliefs we hold is that if we’re not happy, then something is wrong. It is acceptable in our culture to have moments of grief or sadness, however these feelings are expected to shift relatively quickly and to return to ‘normal’.
What does happen when we experience grief as a natural flow in our lives?…
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Balancing the Wings of Love
Balancing the Wings of Love
As I stay awake in bed in the morning, I “see” a prickly surrounding to my entire body. I know that this prickly surrounding is a constant in my experience. It is an inner dialogue that is relentlessly judging and attempting to control my inner experience through disapproval. I spend some time pondering whether this prickly surrounding is an internalized relationship from my childhood. My…
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The Gift of Loneliness
The Gift of Loneliness
Sometimes spiritual circles exalt themes of journeying alone. It is said that our journey ultimately take us to places where it is just us and the Divine. For me, this brings up images of awakening while meditating in a cave up on top of a mountain. There are underlying themes to our inner desires that longing for soul connections is ultimately futile, or a distraction to the goal, even…
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Insatiable Longing and Fullness
Insatiable Longing and Fullness
Many of us are instinctively afraid of our deepest inner longings. How do we transform this hunger into food for our souls?
I’ve been feeling really hungry lately. It feels like a mixed blessing, as I open up to my dreams and fantasies, my desire to play, and increased energy. The mixed part is the feeling of insatiable hunger, an inner longing that feels uncomfortable and tenses up my body.…
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Focusing on What You Want in the New Year
Focusing on What You Want in the New Year
Happy 2017!
On the last day of 2016, I attended a delicious meditation that was about what I wanted 2017 to be about. I got to sink into and connect into what essence or quality I wanted to experience or have more of in 2017. It was easy, as the last couple of weeks of 2016 were already prepping me into feeling what was missing and what I wanted to experience more of.
Sometimes when we connect…
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Longing for Community
Longing for community can really be up for us at this time of the year. Feelings of loneliness arise, whether we are surrounded with people or if we choose to spend the time more quietly. Though feelings of loneliness can feel especially heightened during this time, these feelings can be resonant of a deeper longing we hold in our lives – a longing for feeling at home within community.…
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Separation and Connection with the Divine
Separation and Connection with the Divine
Last summer I toured with Amma, the incarnate Divine Mother, through most of the United States. Steeped in that incredible energy and connection, my prayer during that time with her was to be guided in my life. During that time I felt like I only needed to know the next step, and then the next, and then the next. There was no need for me to see beyond what was here as the next step. I was…
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Navigating Energetically Challenging Times
Navigating Energetically Challenging Times
I sit in a daze. My mind is racing and it is challenging to stay present in my body. My sacrum is tense, and I feel better leaving my body. Instead of the usual uplifting and inspiring messages I see on Facebook feed, it is filled with election responses from people. I don’t understand what is happening or what the election means. I cannot grasp it.
I look towards those whom I respect to…
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Uncertainty and Allowing
“I wish I could show you when you are lonely or in the darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.” – Hafiz
As I grapple lately with increased feelings of uncertainty, I notice a quiet terror building internally. In response, I find myself grasping to hold on to some form that will give me the illusion of safety and protection. My ego scrambles around to see what will soothe it. I…
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Moving from Struggle to Finding the One with Joy
Moving from Struggle to Finding the One with Joy
I’ve been having a lot of juicy conversations lately about relationships. It’s magical for two people to choose to be in relationship together and to continue to choose it over the long term in a way that feels authentic and truly satisfying.
After all, we experience our deepest vulnerabilities in relationships. That is because residing in our desire for relationship are some of our deepest…
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Tumultuous Times and Having a Vision
Tumultuous Times and Having a Vision
On collective and individual levels lately, there are many tumultuous feelings. We may be feeling like we’re up against strong internal programs and patterns. Because they’re so well practiced and strong, it can be challenging in those moments to connect with the greater truth. At the same time, just a moment of witnessing and space can bring up immense gratitude because we’re no longer…
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Vulnerability and Love
I’ve been thinking about vulnerability a lot lately. Recently, I had a really fun experience. I felt connected to community, feeling expansive beyond my norm with both known and unknown people. I also felt pain about the parts of me that shrink, that don’t quite open up.
I woke up the next day feeling the pain even more so. I really didn’t know what to do with the part of me that feels wounded…
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