[ruhkie-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE! i have moved to @ruhkie

i have made some extensive changes to leon as a character/his overall background + backstory. you can read about those changes in my carrd, which is linked in my description! i will be making a summarized post about the changes in a few! see y’all on the flip side. 😌✌️

[ruhkie-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE! i have moved to @ruhkie

i have made some extensive changes to leon as a character/his overall background + backstory. you can read about those changes in my carrd, which is linked in my description! i will be making a summarized post about the changes in a few! see y’all on the flip side. 😌✌️

[ruhkie-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE! i have moved to @ruhkie

i have made some extensive changes to leon as a character/his overall background + backstory. you can read about those changes in my carrd, which is linked in my description! i will be making a summarized post about the changes in a few! see y’all on the flip side. 😌✌️

[ruhkie-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE! i have moved to @ruhkie

i have made some extensive changes to leon as a character/his overall background + backstory. you can read about those changes in my carrd, which is linked in my description! i will be making a summarized post about the changes in a few! see y’all on the flip side. 😌✌️

[ruhkie-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE! i have moved to @ruhkie

i have made some extensive changes to leon as a character/his overall background + backstory. you can read about those changes in my carrd, which is linked in my description! i will be making a summarized post about the changes in a few! see y’all on the flip side. 😌✌️

[ruhkie-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE! i have moved to @ruhkie

i have made some extensive changes to leon as a character/his overall background + backstory. you can read about those changes in my carrd, which is linked in my description! i will be making a summarized post about the changes in a few! see y’all on the flip side. 😌✌️

[ruhkie-a]

not to be annoying but i am so excited for yall to see what i have done with my reboot

[ruhkie-a]

so. i’ve been holding off on making this post for awhile bc i haven’t known how to word it 100% without hurting feelings (or making people feel like i’m trying to aim this at them, when i promise, i’m not trying to point fingers lol.) but i am still in the process of returning to this blog while considering the idea of entirely rebooting/changing many things about my portrayal of leon. i know i’ve been saying this for months now and trust me, i’ve never forgotten it lmao. 

i think the blatant truth at this point is: i’m tired of writing young leon. i’m tired of writing re2 leon and this blog wasn’t ever really meant to be focused on re2 leon; i originally made this blog as a way of exploring post-vendetta leon and the high stress of reaching the end of his career/finally getting the chance to reflect on his life, but i think it kinda turned into young leon’s story over time due to the high demand from writing partners? which i have no issue with but there comes a point where i get bored, you know? 

i also had to deal with force shipping on this blog, which got to a point of becoming excessive. it still is. i had blogs who i’d reached out to plot and immediately, they wanted a ship. sometimes people would be discreet, other times they would be so open about it, i would block on the spot. i kinda wanna make it clear right now: i don’t ship on this blog. i got rid of shipping on this blog a very long time ago ~ nearly right when i first made this blog. i’ve got one ship that translates to most universes and that’s it; that’s all i want + all leon wants. 

in addition to that, i have had to deal with copious amounts of copying. to every single person who’s stolen something from me; i’ve noticed. i’ve noticed pieces of my old writing being scattered in some of my mutuals writing ~ i’ve noticed aspects of my portrayal being used in others (sometimes it would be certain metaphors/similes i would use with leon, other times it would be headcanons.) i always noticed. i stopped posting headcanons/aspects of my portrayal because sometimes, i would post things and i would see things being rewritten on certain blogs word by word. some of them were leon blogs, some of them were other character blogs who legit had just switched “leon” out for their character’s name! originally, i reached out to people! i would ask for people to take certain things down and then it got to a point of frankly not caring anymore. i got tired of trying to stop something i can’t stop from happening. so i got rid of writing headcanons + other things on my own blog bc i felt like i couldn’t! (this was still occurring while i was on my hiatus, just as an fyi. i wasn’t on this blog and people were still taking things lmao. blows my mind, ye know?)

i also have had a hard time returning after all the recent stuff happening in america (and all over the entire world, honestly) with police officers and police brutality, given so many of my alternative verses take place with leon being a cop. i come from a mixed household and it’s hard writing a cop lol, especially given some of my own personal experiences with cops. basically, it’s really fucking hard writing a cop lmao. i also do believe some of it stems from the tumblr politics which have grown so massively over the past few years. i do get nervous writing certain characters because while i know i’m not doing anything wrong, someone else might deem otherwise. so i avoided this blog like crazy for the longest time ~ i didn’t want to write a cop because fuck the police and i also didn’t want to write this kid who i had kinda grown to hate over the past few months. i hated my portrayal because it wasn’t what i wanted to write. 

so ~ i had four things i needed to figure out prior to coming back to this blog. i needed to figure out my portrayal, i need to figure out how to stop people trying to forceship/stealing from me, and i needed to figure out how i felt about writing a cop. i’ve spent the last 5/6 months trying to figure these things out and i think i’ve finally come to somewhat of a conclusion for all of these! (thank god lmao) so, i think within the next few days i’ll be archiving and moving to an entirely new blog. over there, you’ll be able to find a brand new portrayal of my leon on what i want to write. it’ll be my “happy medium” of everything and i’m excited to finally share with y’all what i have been working on for months hehe. ♡

[ruhkie-a]

do y’all ever listen to a song and get heavy muse for a certain character, bc that’s me w leon rn 

[ruhkie-a]

@hopetainted​​     ⁄     hey. stay sharp.

the growls of the undead seep through his ears, growing louder  &  louder with every step he takes. they intertwine with the crunching of fallen leaves on the dirt  &  their combined breathing, his unease bouncing against the lining of his stomach. every patrol taken through the forest in search of supplies for the motel seems to be having more dead roaming about   —   it makes him wonder if there are more people alive than he realizes, or if there’s more dead than he initially anticipated. 

a single crane of his neck is shot in lee’s direction, nodding his head at his words. i hear you. attention is refocused onto the horizon in front of them, stumbling bodies beginning to become visible through the opening between trees. from a quick count, he can count five   —   it’s easy enough for the two of them to manage without any errors. fingers move to retrieve his silenced pistol from its holster, eyes shifting back over to his patrol partner.

❝   you get the two on the right, i get the three on the left.   ❞

[ehllie]

❛   for god has not destined us for wrath,   but to obtain salvation through our lord jesus christ,   who died for us so that whether we are awake or asleep,   we might live with him.   ❜

independent  &  private  junior  deputy  from  far cry 5.    written by ellie.

[loveletter2you]

Kiran Millwood Hargrave, The Mercies

[ruhkie-a]

5thcomplex​:

uncertain and apprehensive: wild.   it catches in her throat,  mulling around in her mouth.   (  ..   what do you miss about earth?  the sound of cattle, the rich fields — actual food).   reminding how her body is no longer hers but belonging to a conglomerate that wants them to wander in the dark whilst an imposter walks among them.          ❛    fair enough;  who am i to judge?   it’s awful,  isn’t it?  the ominous feeling of watching and waiting..  knowing  it  is lurking somewhere:  layering on a façade as one of us.   biding it’s time until it sinks its teeth into someone.    ❜

❛    pinkie swear i won’t.    even if i could,  i wouldn’t.   you’re the only remotely tolerable person on this godforsaken ship.    ❜          it feels like the air is haunted with it,  everything set with immolation and half out of her mind with isolation sickness.   there’s something still rotting awkwardly,  lodged between her forth and fifth ribs/rotting just ever so slightly.   cyan asked how she was feeling earlier and i’ve been feeling a little down.i think i miss the grass.   she is a lost body in the world,  loveliest of sweet throats and the safety of solitude passing every day as isolation sets in again and again.   being alone becomes less of a comfort and more desperately ominous as the numbers dwindle down.   and then there was six,  someone had said over the corpse of green.   she had been too busy holding back bile to comment.   flights of fancy and the rumble of the ship,  creaking and groaning with each ghastly moment.   feels like they’re all drunk of melancholy and waiting,  the sparks catching the edge of her eye & a ghost of cold air blasting her clammy skin.

i hate this fucking place i hate this fucking place —  harsh phases of some missed moon,  starless dusk surrounding them like an endless abyss..  never-fucking-ending death of the universe as they die alone in this ship.

❛    jesus fuck — i don’t know..   i don’t want to be throwing out accusations, y’know?   honestly..  whoever is in red,  they were following me the other day when i was going over the navigation course and ..   god,  this sounds so stupid because the wiring in there was fucked so they were probably just fixing that but i’m kinda glad you called a meeting then.    ❜

❝   that’s comforting to know. thanks for finding me tolerable.   ❞   breathed through a smile, what one on the ship might find unwelcoming, leon is open arms to. he finds it pleasant, like finding a singular flower blooming in a decaying  &  rotting garden. if it brought a smile to his face, he would take it minus the frown that’s become customary across brooding features. a bizarre comparison but everything on this ship was bizarre; it was similar to events you would witness in a sci-fi movie, rooting for everyone to survive but knowing there would only be one final survivor amongst the monster. (anyone seen the thing? anyone think this situation is very similar? anyone? want me to throw in alien?)

upon entering electrical, sky hues land upon the wiring box  &  waste no time. with liz watching his back, there’s ample time to do the repairs. his digits don’t shake, his eyes don’t have to keep peering behind him; while most would oppose his logic  &  shout at him for trusting her, most likely calling him a fool in the process, he believes the opposite. the buddy-system was successful in most scenarios  &  besides, if anyone happened to pass through electrical  &  note he was with liz before finding his corpse, chances are it was her who killed him. the imposter would be found, they would be shot out into space,  &  the crew could live happily ever after. 

a brow is raised at her words, brows knitting together as his head cranes backwards.   ❝   funny you say that about red, i watched them in med-bay awhile ago. figured they had a scan, but they just stood at the vials for awhile? i know they take awhile but i figured, if you have other things you can do ... why stand around?   ❞   the concept is precedented in his mind, considering that’s what yellow told him they had done earlier in the day. (i had to find the odd one out of the bunch, but while they were processing, i went ahead and cleaned out the leaves in oxygen. how the hell did leaves even get in there? we’re in space for fucks sake.) now, he’s left with questioning whether red is the reason for the slaughterhouse on board   —   if it is them, is it just them or is another imposter? are they swift  &  are they massacring everyone at this very moment? the mere thoughts are enough to drive his mind to a cliff, threatening his stability. he swallows them as deep as he possibly can, head twisting back around to the box of wiring, connecting the skewed wires one-by-one. 

❝   glad i could help with my emergency meeting, though. this shit is ... driving me crazy, honestly. i feel insane.   ❞   he’s exasperated but he’s sure he’s not the only one. 

[kaidansalenkos-remade]

Leon Scott Kennedy in Resident Evil 2 Remake (2019)

[ruhkie-a]

@5thcomplex​     ⁄     that would’ve been one helluva first date.

it’s not the comment catching him off guard  —  leon’s gotten used to the eccentric sentences she speaks periodically; it’s the way she says this comment, though. the casual lull of her dulcet voice flowing through his ears; that’s what catches him off guard. it’s enough to make him take a quick glance in her direction, noting the way she gazes out the passenger side window of their shared vehicle. if he wasn’t driving, he’d take this moment to focus on her profile  —  he’d probably fall head first into a myriad of black holes, never finding his way out of the continuous crumbling abyss. (he had a knack for that; always falling head first into situations, never looking at the pros  &  cons of any predicament. it comes with the hero mentality.) his brows wrinkle instead, azure hues positioning themselves back on the stygian road, attempting to ignore her recently spoken words. instead, he keeps his foot placed on the gas pedal, continuing the drive from the mountains back to fall’s end. he was going to need a drink when they got back. 

the rest of the drive went as normal, their conversations about the next plan of action against eden’s gate; the occasional joke about john seed being an idiot, waiting as he would most likely crash his plane one day.  &  yet, leon still couldn’t get her words out of his head. why was he even dwelling on it? it was odd, it didn’t sit well with him  —  it made his heart thump rapidly  &  made him feel like a little kid, watching as his parents stored his presents under the christmas tree. as if he was waiting for the moment to come when he could rip the wrapping off  &  be full of joy. like he was waiting for the moment he could strike  &  make those words somewhat true. it was stupid, it made his eyes roll every time he thought of it  &  the periodic heavy sigh brew from inside his chest. (if liz was taking glances at him, he’s sure he looks more vexed than he is; it’s probably why their conversations were so short tonight.) 

when he pulls into the parking lot of the spread eagle, he wastes no time getting out of the car,  &  stretching his legs  &  arms.   ❝   i hate being in there for so long.   ❞   it’s exhaled as he peers over the roof of the car at his companion, his features scrunching once more. even the glance he takes at her proves his point, the one he’s been thinking about during the whole ride. he’s willing to fall into that abyss of blackness, unable to find his way out if he meant he could spend just two seconds with her. he should be horrified. he should be talking with sheriff whitehouse about this  &  how he needs to go back to being on his own, living with sharky  &  not putting himself in a position of risk. he doesn’t, though. instead, he makes his way around the car  &  stands adjacently across from her.   ❝   just saying, if we were going on a date, it wouldn’t have been that.   ❞   he motions towards the whitetail mountains they’d just retreated from; blood had been shed, bodies would have to be buried. it would’ve been a hell of a first date, but it’s not ideal. not ideal at all.

his stance hardens, almost becoming stern in an unorthodox manner.   ❝   it’d be a real date  ...  like at rae-rae’s pumpkin patch. without sharky. something like that.   ❞   a pause before he gestures towards the bar, not wanting to dwell on the topic any longer.   ❝   i’ll buy the first round.   ❞

[ruhkie-a]

5thcomplex​.

on the good ship skeld that breaks down every five fuckin’ minutes——   time is the only objective observer,  the hum of her wrist-watch flat against her skin and the buzz of the wires,  frayed at the edges.    someone else’s problem.    words scratched from documents and you didn’t sign up to be hunted like an animal.    but you’ve always been wily,  coyote,   born to survive.    fucking mira,  fucking mira,  fucking————

silence isn’t enough or maybe it’s too much with her hands cold and flinching to every little sound,  each creak and moan of the aging ship.   but i am eden.   grand forgotten garden,  still sitting alone in the nighttime and the daytime because at some point they just become an ugly one.   it sets her teeth on edge,  grinding her molars.   she prefers the solitude,  the safety of being alone.   stupid ship,  stupid fucking mira,   stupid fucking imposters ——      ❛    ——— hm?   yeah.   i’m downloading some data anyways,  i was going to check on the O2 filter while it downloads but i can stick around.❜

we inherit everything.   there’s the trauma of an asteroid impact dented into her left shin from a collision impact to some forgotten moon.   fingers curl into the lock of her helmet,  recycled air blushing her skin and the cold settling into her cheeks.   with a click and a hiss,  the vents wheezing behind of them.           ❛    assuming you trust me..  that is.   i won’t be offended if you want me to leave..  or if you come back later.   scary times around here,  kennedy.    ❜

there’s demons in every crevice of this ship, waiting  &  lurking for their moment to strike. he’s already surprised he hasn’t stumbled across another grotesque sights, guts spilled amongst his feet as blood seeped itself further into the floorboards. a sight so sickening, one would’ve screamed right on the spot; he’s getting used to it. he stayed quiet as he wandered back to the cafeteria, hitting the emergency button as he calmed told everyone of the body’s location.  no suspects, no one outside react   —   is this a fucking joke, guys?  it’s gotten easier to tell the others not to bother him, keeping his distance as he darts to the opposite side of the ship to avoid them  —  he can only surmise there’s more crew-mates onboard than imposters, but it doesn’t help the growing rotten feeling inside his stomach. if they won’t kill him, it’ll be himself from the paranoia. he’s growing more accustomed to that reality, than the former choice. 

gouging his paranoia out of his veins, he manages to force a chuckle as he nods. a buddy-system is ideal in times like these, but also offers an opportune moment to strike  &  slide a knife right into his back. larvae is burrowed deep amongst some of the crew-mates, angry  &  red, ready to be released as if they’re toxins to poison you all.   ❝   tell me about it.  i keep wanting to go back to the cafeteria, to be safe.   ❞   he confesses, eyes rolling behind the transparent slit on his helmet. an expression of indifference is plastered across his face, one he hopes masquerades the panic currently soaring throughout his body. his heart tells him to run: run for your life, rookie, don’t turn back. but his head tells him his job isn’t done: finish your tasks, rookie; suck it up. this is not how i expected my first day to be going. 

sliding past her, he begins his trek inside the dark electrical room, head craning back at his fellow crew-mate.   ❝   if you wanna’ stay for a minute, cool. i’d appreciate it. just don’t  ...  kill me or eat me, you know?   ❞   it’s an attempt of a joke, but it comes out more sinister in his heart than anticipated. it’s a harsh reality to swallow, but it’s reality. no dream, nothing he can hide from   —   it’s up to all of them to figure this out; no one is coming to save us.   immediately upon entering the room, he sees the sparks flying from the cut wires, his features scrunching in trepidation as he approaches. beginning to reconnect them, he decides to make small talk.   

❝   you got any idea who the imposters might be?    ❞

[ruhkie-a]

@5thcomplex​

out here in the vastness of space, every movement matters; every twist, every turn, every stride   —   it all matters now. every second wasted is another second where they move among you, waiting for the moment to strike  &  leave your body scattered across the ivory floor. when the alarm rang throughout the ship, his heart sank; the second killing so far. a body found in med-bay, a lime green spacesuit covered in dripping carmine ichor, a single gunshot wound to the skull, no suspects   —   fuck. an imposter is among us: who will survive the massacre? in his pocket, tasks have hastily been scribbled across, readable to his eyes only as he continues through the spaceship. the ship is turning into a slaughterhouse, blood spilling across the floor  &  painting everyone on board.  what if you’re next?  it’s a feeling lingering inside your gut, threatening to claw its way out like a monster. it’s eating him from the inside out, the trepidation radiating off of him like sun beams. 

with every step, a twist of his head in every corner; the lights are dimmed, he hasn’t seen anyone in minutes.   [he’s beginning to lose track of time. seconds turn into minutes, minutes into hours   —   it’s becoming an unending eternity of misery.]   electrical is written in yellow on the right-side of the wall, a deep breath being taken from inside his cobalt-colored spacesuit. rpd is boldly written across the back, the only reminder of his life back on earth   —   a rookie assigned with a mission. definitely not the mission he was anticipating. with another five steps, a white spacesuit comes into his view up ahead near electrical; there’s a palpable excitement when he sees the person, but then he remembers: there’s a killer on the loose. they might be it.   

as he gets closer, he notices the strands of flaxen - colored hair peeking underneath the helmet.   ❝   liz?   ❞   she’s the only blonde on board that leon remembers boarding. he steps closer, cautiously, brows knitting together under his helmet. at the doorway, he swallows the urge to run back to the cafeteria  &  emergency meeting.  [for no reason whatsoever. doing so would only hurt him in the long run anyways; it’d make him seem suspicious.]    ❝   you sticking around? i gotta’ fix the wiring in here.   ❞