The faint half-laugh that left her lips said his assumptions had been right: She knew her thinking was one of the slipperiest of slopes, just like she knew that she was, ultimately, replacable by those she had once called their home. The only reason she still existed was the relationship she held with the man before her; they knew they could use her. As a Ruinbringer, she was replacable. There were several others who could do her job, several others who did do her job and had worked with her.
But it was Ria alone who could serve a a leash. Of all the Ruinbringers, she had been the one he'd chosen to stand closest to him, even before their relationship had formed as it now stood. She'd specifically been one the one he called on most and the one he worked best with among those born from Destruction and Ruin, and while the Skies didn't need her to wipe the world's surface clean of life when the time came, they did need her to keep him in line. He couldn't rebel so long as they held her physical form deep within the Celestial Sky, least of all encased in crystal designed to slowly drain her of her life - A fate that had been stalled only because of him and Mydei.
They didn't need her to do her job, but if she were to die, or even just vanish... She'd seen her husband's fury before. She could still remember the rage that had burned in him, both during Halcyon's end, and during...
In the end, it was the mention of his and Mydei's most recent cycles that made her breath catch in her throat, grip tightening on her skirt. A glance up to find his head tilted and confused expression did however, help to ease some of the aches; was he aware just how much like an oversized, fluffy puppy he resembled? Or how the thought of such quirked her lips into a soft, gentle smile despite the pain and concerns storming within her?
Slowly, her lips parted again, this time to let out a soft sigh first and foremost despite the sight of him and his concern keeping her small smile all but glowing. "It's not felt right since we settled here. It's as if it's teetering on the edge, though I'm not sure I could tell you what's over that edge, either. Some days it's as if it's about to consume me, yet others still it feels as if it's on the brink of fading. From what I can tell, the crystal hasn't eaten through that much of our shared power, but..."
Ria pull in a deep, careful breath, briefy turning her focus inward, towards the soul they shared, and the constant pull attached to it. Her crystalline prison had been designed to ever so slowly drain her power and erode the delicate balance within; it wanted to drian her dry, and if it couldn't get there on its own, then Ruin would. A power that wanted nothing less than to consume everything it could as well as what she'd been 'born' from, it would take the chance to utterly destroy her if she didn't keep it in check, and without her power to actually keep that balance...
She'd been lucky. Both Mydei and Phainon had willingly placed themselves in their own cycles, starting over again whenever that delicate balance tipped in a bad direction. When Ruin gnawed on the soul the three shared, one or both of them would start a new cycle to restore and refresh their control on it, pushing it back where it belonged. If not for them and their willingness to share their power between them as well, she was sure the pull of the crystal would've killed her several millions of years ago, the glow in her chest almost pulsing ever so briefly under both the thought and her satisfaction their soul still remained stable in that moment.
"I'm not sure either," she'd continue after a few moments, drawing herself back out of her internal checks. "But I can tell you it doesn't feel right, and hasn't since I drew you and Mydei back from... There. Do you... Suppose it was something to do with taking hold of it again? I've not had to for so long... Or something done to me because of the Scepter...?"
She refused to name it. That place... The wounds were still fresh, and would continue to be for quite some time, her own head tilting in mimiced confusion. "If the later... Do you feel all right? It's been a while, yes, but that was too long of an experience - yet if you feel fine, perhaps we can rule it out. Admittedly, a part of me hopes it's that and not simply because I pushed myself to draw you back out... If it is the later, they'll know. We've gone this long hiding how much power we have to keep me alive, if they discover I'm able to use Ruin like I was before..."
Less of a slippery slope, and more concern - The skies discovering their ruse was a danger to all three of them and then some, yet another concern added to the pile. "I can't tell, Khas, and that concerns me. I don't know how long I can hold onto it, if the balance right now is enough, what it wants or if losing control would be good or bad... But I know I need to keep that control. You and Mydei can't keep it in check alone, after all."
Was it a bad time for a subtle tease?