My demons are begging me to o p e n up my mouth. I need them, mechanically make the words come out. They ( FIGHT ) me, vigorous and angry, watch them pounce. Ignite me, licking up the flames they bring about I sold my soul to a three-piece And he told me I was H O L Y. he's got me down on both knees, but it's the DEVIL. that's tryna hold me down.
Stubborn â that was the word. Demetria ADORED attention revolving around her⊠And a majority of the time, it was the good attention she desired; the flirting, the praise but this kind of attention? It wasnât as though she was purposely tried to centre herself in this position but her feelings were kind of a big deal in this situation. The beauty could feel her muscles convulsing, her knuckles tightening and her lungs overworking but the second he cupped her cheeks, everything stopped. The noises drowned out and the room grew silent as she gazed up toward him with trembling eyes. âI DO trust you⊠And you know I want more than that, itâs just terrifying, okay?â A sigh vibrated through her throat as her own palms made their way to his lower back, fingertips sneaking their way into the waist of his jeans. âItâs fucking scary when youâve been in a place like this for a year and a half â no sign of getting out. What if you canât come back? What if you canât get me out?â Hazel eyes fell down to his torso, face slipping from his palms and tipping forward to press her head against his chest, her voice almost a whisper now â WEAK with worry. âI canât believe Iâm saying this but⊠Do what you have to do but please, donât forget me.â
â well if you TRUST ME, itâll be over before you know it . . . iâm trying to do the right thing, demi. my life has been ass and...iâm trying to fix it. â he didnât get why she was so upset and making this all about HER. rickyâs jaw tightened, and he was trying his absolute best to keep himself in line. he cared about her, he didnât want to leave her, but it was something he NEEDED to do. he didnât positively react to her sudden touch right away, eyes looking anywhere but down at her. â look. . . i get it. . . but that isnât going to happen. i care about you, i really really care about you. weâre going to figure. it. out.â the brunette finally gave her his gaze, moving his hands to cup her face; â forget you?? are you fucking KIDDING ME?? that's the craziest thing iâve ever heard, demi . . .you say some wack ass shit but...christ, i could never forget you. itâs going to be a few weeks and that's it. âÂ
Practically flinching away as his fingers curled around her arms and pacing a few steps away in an attempt to protect herself, bloodshot eyes pierced his chocolate pools. âLOOK at us⊠Youâre getting out and Iâm fucking trapped here â youâve already abandoned me.â That was the issue â Ricky was better, but Demetria? She was still as fucking ill â if not, WORSE â than the day she had entered Serenity House⊠Every cruel and selfish remark that she was spitting at him was her disorder speaking. Never in a million years would Demi want him to think that she didnât care about his wellbeing, because she did. She just couldnât imagine being left on her own again and if Ricky wanted to sit and reason with her, he could try. âWho wants a girlfriend, stuck in some stupid hospital, states away from them? Youâll get fed up⊠Youâll meet someone â someone better than me who can give you MORE than what I can⊠Weâd be fucking insane to get our hopes up.â
â you being trapped here isnât M Y fault, demetria, for FUCK sakes. . . â he drew back to push irritated fingers through his hair, having a heavy sigh as he ran his palms down his face. clearly, she didnât give a shit about him getting better. all of her bullshit lectures about her wanting the best for him ?? she was really talking about HERSELF.  â this isnât about you demi, for fucking once this isnât about you, okay ?? get that through your fuckinâ stubborn s k u l l.â he wasnât scared to call her out on her bullshit, he moved towards her and cupped her face; â look, i feel things towards you that i have NEVER felt towards anyone else. . . you wouldnât lose me that easily. itâs just going to be for a few weeks and then iâll come back for you. . . donât you trust me ?? donât you trust that i care about you enough to try and better myself so we might have an actual FUTURE ?? donât you want more with me than fuckinâ BRIELLE and sex in shitty dormitories... ?â
INCAPABLE of even making eye contact, the beauty ensured that her back was turned to Richard so that she could dry away the crystallised trails that stained her cheeks. âDo you HAVE to go? Why canât you just lie and say youâre not feeling any better?â Even those words caused another stream to escape from tear ducts, head hanging low and lightly sobbing to herself. Why was it that people were so PRONE to leaving Demetria? It was as though she carried some kind of curse around with her, a warning flag flying above her head. Another person that she had ALLOWED in, to take her heart and they were running off with it⊠âWhy will nobody stay in my life? Is there something that WRONG with me?â He was already one step ahead; at least he had told her that he would no longer be living under the roof of Brielle Institue.
ââŠthat isnât how it works, demi,â one would think their girlfriend would be HAPPY about their release from a mental institution. . . yet here demi was, pleading with him to LIE. â iâve been taking my meds, my panic attacks and anger shit is all under control now. . .â he moved around her, grabbing her biceps and trying to fish for hazels that refused to avert themselves in his direction. â STOP THAT....christ, will you listen to me??â he dropped his head, taking a deep breath; â look, this is something i have to do for myself, dem. i promise iâll send letters and...and iâll keep in contact as much as i can. iâll come back for your or something... iâd never abandon you-â
â... thatâs what HAPPENS when you donât shut your fuckinâ mouth, â ricky sneered as he wiped the scarlet fluid that was dripping from his nose with the back of his hand, having sent his male opponent to the ground after delivering a hard PUNCH to his jaw. the pair had been arguing, the other had made an attempt to swing at ricky and it hadnât worked out well for him. ricky dropped down and pinned the otherâs chest with his knee, taking a handful of his shirt between sore knuckles. â wanna take back what you said about her, PUNK?? or do you want me to r i p you a NEW ONE?? âÂ
â hey, baby guess what ??!!â ricky called out with a grin after slipping into demiâs room where she was currently, unbeknown to him, changing in the closet. â my fuckhead psychologist FINALLY decided to take me off of that wack ass pill that had me all depressed and shit. i was thinking we could steal some booze or something from whatsherface in the confiscation room and CELEBRATE.â his smile was quickly wiped right off his face when he hung a left and was now facing his topless...whatever, blinking dumbly for a moment before a glint of a smirk lingered on his lips; â or...YâKNOW, this works, too.â
OF COURSE, Demetria wanted to stay â she wanted to be the one to pull the male out of the dark hole that he had gotten himself buried into. Six months of flirting, fucking, tears and terror. Demi had gotten used to having Richard around and she didnât want that to end any time soon⊠But she didnât want him to confuse his sadness with feelings â she couldnât HANDLE being left with nothing but disappointment. A troubled sigh tickled up through her throat as hazels pined over him, feeling the quivered beg lifting into the steamed air and polluting it. How could she possibly say no? Staring into the cocoa hues that were far too tempting, her own gaze was crystallised with emotion. For somebody suffering her disorder, Demi didnât want to make this all about her. It had NEVER been about her. A slow, but sure nod eventually worked its way through her body like a puppet, bent against its will and Ricky was the ventriloquist; forcing her answer to be the one he wanted to hear. Words were about to leave her lips, until he began to draw back layers of what covered her vulnerabilities from him. Autumnal irises remained fixated on him, lips parted as the water paused momentarily until her hooded sweatshirt wound up on the tiled floor, only to come crashing down on her body that was stood in the centre of the shower block. The beauty wasnât quite sure of what to think, what to FEEL but she did know that she didnât want to be anywhere but here.Â
âI donât want you to be alone either, but I donât want you to confuse your trauma with feelings that might not be there tomorrowâŠâ
THAT was how you knew there had been a change within Demetria Rivers â she wasnât trying to gain his pity, his sexual angst, OR his attention â but his own personal happiness. This though, felt different to anything she had ever experienced â the brunette thought that she had felt love before but Aiden turned out to be nothing more than a little boy⊠Richard though, was DIVERGENT. He was a man, tainted by terrors that were swimming through his veins and causing outbursts, like a drug that wouldnât decay from his system â a TOXICITY that his father had left behind. Demetria was just jumping to conclusions now. The blood that was pulsating through her body was leaving a dizzy spell rushing through her mind and she was beginning to assume that Richard felt the way she did, she just didnât want to come out and SAY those words, to unveil her own apprehension. Eyes slid downward, in awe of their fingertips which had begun to intertwine with one anotherâs â it was a PERFECT fit, and yet she didnât want to make a fool of herself. If the imagine inside her irises didnât make her feelings for Richard crystal clear, then she didnât know what else would. Thanks to issues in her past, she was just too TERRIFIED to utter the words and risk losing him.. That was where her disorder had stemmed from in the very beginning; denial, disapproval and decline.
there was hesitance, and he TASTED it against the roof of his mouth as his tongue probed at it uncomfortably. it couldnât sit still, and neither could he, not even able to LOOK at her. he could feel her skin wanting to be against his, a warmth e m i t t i n g from her despite the draft in the bathroom and the pounding of quickly cooling water against their exposed flesh. . . but there was RELUCTANCE. something was holding her back, and ricky was certain it was his crippling mental health. the cards he had first put on the table offered NOTHING more than a good time. nothing more than NOTHING more than a good time. nothing more than a youâre horny, iâm horny, lets make it happen. ricky had never predicted that he would offer never predicted that he would offer anything more than his physical self to the beauty currently standing with him; standing despite the tears and the panic and the collapsing of self-worth. . . he wasnât sure what he wanted from demi right now. company ?? a distraction ?? the pregnant pause between them, the sharing of recovering breaths, the sharing of STILLNESS. it was enough to make ricky antsy and panicky all over again. . . he always hated the waiting. his hands moved to hold her face, his eyes now shut, head bent forward as if he were bowing to royalty ( in a way, he WAS ). at her words, the gentle circling of the pads of his thumbs on the apples of her cheeks ceased. â ... feelings?? â what did she mean by FEELINGS ?? ricky was having a moment, but he had them and then they went away... â demetria, please, not now. â ricky didnât have any FEELINGS. he was just stressed, his disorder was chipping away at his mental well-being and he had been holding everything in for so long. the storm had taken a toll on him and really drove him past his breaking point. he just wanted everything to be breaking point. he just wanted everything to be NORMAL again. ricky didnât want to address his feelings...let alone the ones he had towards the brunette.Â
if he had any, that was.
. . . did he ??
it doesnât matter.Â
â iâm not confusing anything, i p-promise. . . i just- i REALLY want you to stay. i really, really want you to stay, demetria.â
There is a satisfied smile that plays across Heatherâs mouth, not because she is flattered, but because this is just how she expects people to see her. She had low expectations, coming in here; if everyone around her was crazy, they might not get her. A few, it seems, will. âNo secret stash of hard liquor? I guess grape is the lesser of two evils then. The staff keep a pretty tight rein on this place, right, like thereâs not some underground party scene?â Itâs a hospital, so she wasnât really expecting much in the way of parties, but it never hurts to ask.
â unfortunately, â he sighed, lifting his clothed shoulders in a soft shrug. ricky had never been much of a drinker, he preferred a rolled joint and a HOT GIRL draped on each arm. thumbs drummed on the faces of juice boxes before handing her the grape one, eyes gleaming as they watched the blonde intently. â well, being as the staff is crazier than the patients. . .i bet theyâve got some underground party scene.â he licked his lower lip, eyes openly drinking in her figure; â the patients, though ?? well, everyone just kind of FUCKS each other.â
Itâs all obviously a bit over the top and dramatic, but Heather loves being fawned over, particularly by cute guys. Sharing an indulgent grin with him, as if they both know the rules to this game, she flutters like this is new to her. âHeather,â she affirms. âI have to say, Mr. Darcy, this is a much warmer welcome than the doctors gave me. Youâre getting my hopes up that this might not be the hellscape I imagined. Rustle up a drink and I might even start having fun,â She doesnât actually expect him to have any booze around; itâs increasingly obvious that this is a no-party zone. It just seems that Heather in incapable of going ten minutes without thinking about getting a damn drink.
â heather, â the name tasted like strawberry chapstick and expensive perfume, like a typical white bitch who walked around like they owned the world and their shit didnât stink. â mr. darcy... so youâre beautiful AND educated ?? â ricky hummed, a smirk possessing his lips as he kept the otherâs hand in his own. â a drink . . . â he inquired, only releasing her hand to pick up their two juice boxes; â apple or grape, mâdear ?? â
So, the thing is, Heather likes to consider herself a master manipulator - and she can be. But sheâs also very easily manipulated; say, for instance, the moment a guy calls her princess. Sheâs totally won over. âWhat gave it away? The hurricane outshined my dramatic entrance, I thought Iâd slipped under the radar.â
the man let out an audible amusement at her comment, the laugh short-lived but genuine as two dimples showed their faces in the flesh of his cheeks; . â iâm ashamed of myself, â ricky confessed, shaking his head at her comment as he sized her up and down with his eyes. . â canât believe i let a HURRICANE distract me from a b e a u t i f u l girl like yourself. how FOOLISH of me. . . â the man then dorkishly took the otherâs hand and lifted it to his lips, pressing a tender kiss against the hills of her knuckles. â richard talbot- pleased to make your acquaintance miss...?? â
PULSATING like it was gripping on for dear life, Demetriaâs heart throbbed and pounded so heavily that she thought her ribcage was going to shatter. If only she had known what Rickyâs father had truly done â perhaps she would be on her way OUT of Brielle and on the next train, or bus, or WHATEVER to San Francisco, ready to deliver an earful to the Talbot family. Demi cared for Richard, more than she would have liked to admit; her feelings were ever-growing and she selflessly wanted the best for him, even if that meant that she was to have no part in his life. The whistling of pipes and the downpour of water had drowned out of her eardrums â she could no longer hear it and she could no longer feel that water that was drenching her and covering her in more sorrow. All Demi could feel was HIM, and it was all that mattered. The brunette had never quite experienced a panic attack and she didnât know the first thing about preventing them⊠What she did know however, was that Richard NEEDED her. The warmth of his fingertips caused her to radiate â her own heart seemed as though it had slid down from her wind pipe and back into itâs rightful place, continuing to beat as though she was human again. Afire autumns continuously flickered between mesmerising pools of mud â tainted and made DIRTY, by the evil things his father once did to him â and the curvature of his own lips, deciding on which sheâd rather lovingly glare at. He HAD to know that she admired him and would do anything within her power to make him feel better⊠Surely, he could feel the passion bouncing from her soul and filling the steamed air around them.Â
Dampened lashes battered towards him, eyes looking glossy with adrenaline as he leaned in towards her. Something felt DIFFERENT â perhaps it was the fact that his heart rate was beginning to drop and he wasnât jumping onto her like he usually did because that fuel wasnât filling his crotch, adrenaline wasnât soraing through his veins. Allowing her petals to work in synchronisation with his, Demetria closed her eyes as she felt the fireworks exploding in the distance â a variety of colour, pink, red and purple all shedding their light into the sky and providing some sense of direction. It was a shame that the girl was so damn DOUBTFUL. Keeping herself a few inches back from him, rather than creating more distance between the pair, the beauty gave a false smile. She wanted to feel every part of Richard, to SHOW him how she actually felt but she couldnât handle the humiliation. She couldnât risk this beautiful friendship that they had formed to just throw it in the trash, like Aiden had⊠Shaking her head, to not keep him waiting for a response, Demetria gave a sigh as she allowed her fingertips to brush his hair back. âDonât worry and please, donât be sorry⊠Itâs okay and like I said, Iâm here⊠We all need somebody sometimes.â Keeping that forced smile on her face, Demetria looked down at her baggy joggers that were sticking to her skin and the grey hoodie that was now practically black from the water. She wanted to stay, just to make sure that he was safe and sound but whenever the couple found themselves tangled amongst one another, it was usually because they needed a distraction from their MISERABLE lives, passion was exchanged. She could only assume it was the same this time and that the feelings behind his kiss, were purely because he needed to remain calm, to decrease his heart rate. Hands slid down from his face and gave his free hand a tight squeeze, her imagination flowing into the distance, thinking of the possibilities of what could happen. Soon, snapping out of this though, her hazels bolted back up to Richardâs and her hands tugged away, realising that she was probably crossing a boundary. âIâll â um⊠Iâll let you shower.â
as he remained p r e s s e d against her torso, drenched fabric heavy on his forehead as he gripped feverishly onto the material against her back. he heaved deep-set breaths and attempted to regain control over himself. after drawing away, he couldnât BARE to meet her eyes. HUMILIATION coated every fiber of his being, possessed each nerve and had every hair- despite the dampness- standing on edge. he couldnât believe he had allowed someone like DEMETRIA to see him in such a state. he felt pathetic. he could feel his fatherâs t a u n t i n g words prying through the sounds of demiâs comfort and the colliding of water & linoleum tiling. . . he hadnât known why he had kissed her. usually his lips were seeking hers during a lust-driven escapade beneath dormitory covers or in the dim light of a storage closet; never INTIMATE or intertwined with deeper meaning. his heart, not slowing, only seemed to increase when he felt the tender brushing of her fingers against the hills of his knuckles, his lungs compressing as the digits wrapped around his like silk ribbon and SQUEEZED. strange, d i f f e r e n t, but reassuring, none the less. words didnât find their way to his lips until after she had stood, and he found himself craving the sensitivity of her fingertips and the caress of her understanding once more.  â âŠÂ demi, â he pleaded, lifting himself from the ground, heart in his chest as he reached for her hands once more, capturing porcelain with rough, calloused hands. his eyes were dark ( he had SEEN things ) but the light from the dull bulb flickering above them shone just enough in his milk-chocolate irises to capture the desperation ebbing within them. â âŠplease, PLEASE; stay...â he lifted himself from his seated position, skin p e p p e r e d with goosebumps as the warmth of the shower was removed. ricky stood before the other, both drenched from head to toe, and he knotted his fingers in the moistened fabric of her sweatshirt before gently working it up and over her head, disposing of it as he ran the palms of his trembling hands up and down her bare arms before digits began to fumble and toy with hers; Â
â âŠi really donât want to be alone right now. â
Looking at the juicebox sheâs been served in dismay, Heather raises a perfectly manicured brow. She was just out of hospital, and getting your stomach pumped leaves you with a terrible thirst. Sadly, between being transferred from that hospital to this psych ward, she hasnât been able to get a drink. A real drink, not a box of goddamn grape juice.
âOh, adorable,â she hums, tossing her hair over her shoulder. âJuice. Such fun.â
. â yup, â ricky agreed, drumming his thumbs against the face of his own carton of mots-tots juice . . . â i heard if you ask NICELY, theyâll give you some nilla wafers and a ham and cheese lunchable with the chips ahoy cookie in it. . . â the man then looked up at her, a lopsided grin on his features; . â you new here, princess ?? âÂ
Following closely behind Richard, as if he was her PROTECTOR from the dark, Demetria kept her arms folded and her eyes on alert. It wasnât that she was frightened of the dark â sheâd just rather not be wandering around in it, in the middle of a storm but being with Ricky made it that little more bearable. Silence surrounded them and the beauty could feel that something was wrong⊠Richard wasnât quite RICHARD. She just wanted to grab him, pull him into her and assure him that everything was going to be okay and that he had HER, but that was simply unrealistic. Demi knew how relationships with guys like Ricky panned out and it wasnât pretty. From the moment that he had started to unclothe himself, Demetria continued to walk around to the side of the stall, putting her weight against it as one million things circled her mind. How could she help him as a friend, when she had already fallen for him? What could she do to make this situation better? Why couldnât she promise that everything was going to get better? Autumn hues glared down at the tiled floor below as a sigh got caught in her throat. Lips parted, ready to spit the words out and attempt to show him some support. âRichard? Are you okay?â Threaded arms left her feeling lonelier as she didnât have HIM holding her⊠All she could do was cradle herself and await his answer, which didnât seem to be coming. The pitter patter of water slapped the tiles, the creaking of the pipes left the shower room feeling haunted, the struggling breath â
INSTANTLY throwing herself away from the wall and tugging the shower curtain open in ALARM, Demetriaâs heart shattered into several pieces at the sight she didnât want to see. Richard, was curled in the smallest of balls, rocking back and forth as the water came crashing down like rain. With his face buried in his purple painted forearm, an expression of panic plastered across her face as she rushed in to sweep him up off the floor. âHey, hey, hey⊠What is wrong? You know you can talk to me, Richard.â Soaking herself now, with little care in the world, fingers wrapped their way around his jaw and tilted his chin upward to reveal BLOODSHOT eyes⊠Veins pinpointed their way along his whites and threaded red into his chocolate pools, trembling with fear. The brunette could have sworn that her heart had jumped so high into her throat, that her breath was becoming hitched â she did not know what to do, other than just HOLD him. âIâm here, okay? Iâm always here â I mean it. Come here.â Tossing her arms around his nape and whispering âshushâ into his ear in an attempt to calm him, Demetria held on tightly and shook her head as she buried her own face in the crook of his neck. All she wanted to do was show Richard how much he meant to her already, as a friend or MORE⊠He had already reclaimed her heart as his own. Gritting her teeth together, upset for him, she pulled back to gaze into his eyes, feeling the material of her clothing sticking to her skin. âTalk to me, Rich - please.âÂ
each groan of the shower pipe, each CRACK of lightning and each low rumble of ground-shaking thunder had the boy spiraling further and further into a regressed mentality. insecurities and pure FEAR swarmed the confinements of his skull. he felt as if he was ten again, burried beneath his covers moments after his father had left him- moaning in pain and panicking because his body wouldnât move. unable to withhold the audible panic any longer, when the curtain was yanked back and the rings scraping along metal ignited a sharp SQUEAL, he curled up even tighter, sobbing HYSTERICALLY as his body shivered under the icy jet-stream. he flinched when the girl touched her, fearing for a moment it would be the hand of his father, ready to claw at rickyâs skin until he was nothing but BONE. âno- no PLEASE!â he begged, his voice breaking, the usually cool and collected male possessed by panic and  h y s t e r i a. when his chin was tilted, he prepared for impact but opened his eyes to find demi, forgetting momentarily he had dragged her by her sleepy hind-legs to accompany him.Â
when the girl wrapped her fabric-encased arms around him, DOUSING him in whatever water the hoodie sleeves had absorbed. he was ninety percent certain this was his, but at the given moment, it didnât PHASE him. suffocaed by sobs, he pressed his face into the girls chest and allowed himseg to cry. ricky had NEVER been comforted in the midst of one of his panic episodes. he gripped at the soaked cotton, holding on for dear life as his trembling figure remained pressed up against her. a grown man TORN down by the traumatizing acts of a father, a man who had taken rickyâs childhood and forced him to build up brick walls- walls so high not even RICKY could see over the top. after what felt like hours, the man finally began to come down from the peak of his panic, his breathing slow, still sharp and heavy in his chest, but not nearly as rapid and uncontrolled as before. the tears had stopped, his face red, almost limp in demetriaâs grasp. when she drew back and cupped his face, exhaustion painted violet sunsets under his eyes, his features almost HOLLOW. he sat there, staring at her, swollen lips parted. he then slowly raised his own hand to cup her soaked face, running the pad of his thumb along the RIPENED apple of her cheek as he frowned. no words were able to pass his lips- and he wanted to THANK HER.Â
....so he did the only thing he knew how to do. he very slowly leaned in towards her face- NOT in the lustful, aggressive, eager-to-dominate way he had in the past- but slowly, and very softly allowed his dampened lips to brush against her own. he hovered there, allowing himself to breathe slowly for a moment before pressing a meaningful, INTIMATE, kiss against her pouted petals- as if to say THANK YOU and replace any explanation she craved. he only drew back to whisper, lips still flush against hers so she could TASTE his embarassment; âiâm sorry- fuck, iâm SO sorry. iâm SO sorry demetria i- i donât...i donât understand why...âÂ
Although it had never been discussed, there was some negotiation between the two that they would never speak of his breakdown in the garden all those months ago⊠Richard was like an egg; a protective layer surrounding him, avoiding any cracks that could damage his outer shell, whilst the inside remained vulnerable. Her lower lip raked its way between her teeth, contemplating whether she wanted to get up and leave or attempt to catch up on her sleep. How could she leave him though? Demetriaâs heart was starting to warm back up, after Aiden had frozen it and she was falling for Ricky. Luckily though, she had learned her lesson the first time and wasnât going to be making confessions any time soon. She could feel how cold Richard was and she was DESPERATE to help and so, she gave a half smile, followed by a slow nod. âI â sure. Yeah, Iâll come with you.â Allowing her thumb to smooth over his cheek bone before pulling away and digging herself out of her sleeping bag, Demi grabbed the baggy hoodie that was tossed on the floor beside her bed and carelessly yanked it over her head. She would NEVER usually parade around looking like some hobo but she was with Ricky and she felt just as comfortable with him, as she did her own family - it was like he was her HOME.
as the girl contemplated, a painful sense of PANIC began to build in his chest again. swelling like a balloon, ribs creaking as they stretched against the latex of his anxiety; about to BURST. his eyes, shiny copper coins pleading and TIRED, fished into mossy irises, h o p i n g that sheâd recognize his desperation. âi know itâs late- FUCK, i donât even know what time it is but...demetria, please.â and finally, the soothing graze of her thumb against a heightened cheek bone allowed him to exhale a gust of air that he had trapped unknowingly in his lungs. âthank you,â he whispered, manners only young ricky were familiar with. once she had changed, dressing warmer- he remained in his tee-shirt and loose fit joggers. if it had been light in the room, one would be able to notice to dark, moistened stains that had littered his shirt. he was hoping demi wouldnât pick up on the pungent odor of his SWEAT; he had been tossing and turning, anxiety suffocating him, P A R A N O I A gripping at his every fiber. his diagnosis had left him biting his forearm to keep quiet- just as he did when he was a child. the man took the otherâs hand once she had changed, squeezing it tightly before swiftly guiding the pair out of the room and into the dim lit hallway. the showers, thankfully, werenât far from where they were. at the current moment, ricky had no sexual intentions, he just needed to COOL OFF, but that could EASILY change depending on how demetria reacted. in all honestly, ricky was just scared to be by himself ( not that heâd EVER admit that... not yet, at least ). without making a single sound, keeping demi beside him by his gripping of her doll-like hand, the man led them to the showers.Â
once they had arrived, ricky felt along the wall for a switch, fumbling with his free hand before feeling the little toggle- flicking it north. the bulbs above them whirred and flashed before a dull, blue-tinted light poured from them. due to the generator being their only sense of power, the lights werenât bright...in fact, they hardly contributed anything. nevertheless, it was better than nothing. ricky said nothing to the brunette as he swiftly ducked between the stalls, locating the nearest one and turning on the water. he didnât hesitate to pull his DRENCHED top from over his head, all while his chest began to rise and fall at a rapid rate. a sob climbed its way into his throat and ricky couldnât breathe. he felt his eyes BURNING, lifting his bruising forearm to his mouth to bite down as hard as he could and silence anything that DARED to graze his tongue. panic had  c o m p l e t e l y taken over him, and after he had stripped off his joggers- left in nothing but cotton boxers and bruised skin- he moved under the water. itfelt euphoric; the cool bullets of ice striking his aching muscles, sore from his restlessness. ricky kept his back to the open showers in case demetria DARED to look at him; he was ASHAMED of himself...ASHAMED of the tears that leaked from screwed eyes as he tasted IRON from the piercing of his skin. ricky couldnât handle it anymore and pressed his back against the shower wall, slowly sliding down it as he couldnât hold himself up any longer, his body trembling as he pressed his forehead to his knees.
How everybody around her had managed to fall asleep was BEYOND her⊠After hours of tossing and turning, where the supervising staff members were starting to doze off in their chars too, Demetria had finally drifted off into dreamland â only to be woken again. Lashes fluttered open heavenly, brows dropped in concern as she was faced with the expression on Richardâs portrait. Propping herself up on one elbow, the brunette raised a hand to his cheek as some minor attempt to calm him down. She could see the panic that was tainting his face from the orange of the bulb that glowed across the room, but it was the strike of lightning that caused her to see just how distraught her really was. Eyebrows fully furrowed as she forced herself to sit up now, analysing Richard in a worried way. âAre you okay â what is the matter?â
swallowing the cold, hard lump in his throat- richard couldnât bring himself to offer an EXPLANATION to the raven-haired beauty, swiping a quick tongue against a trembling lower lip as chocolate pools adverted towards the flickering light bulb and the staff member who had FINALLY nodded off into sleep. âyeah, iâm fine,â he snapped, colder than intended. his larger hand moved to rest atop her porcelain one, her fragile fingers warm against his previously-moistened cheeks. he turned his face back to hers, chewing on the inside of his cheek for a moment as he struggled to comfortably make eye contact; âcome to the showers with me? donât ask why just- please.â
âdem,â ricky whispered in a hushed voice, shaking the shoulder of his...acquaintance. his eyes were glazed with PANIC, exhaustion painting chizled features as the pale light coming from the lamp next to a drifting-off staff member illuminated shadows along his face. the raging storm and alarming bolts of lightening had triggered him, his breaths growing short as he tried as hard as he possibly could to keep his shit together. ricky had never liked STORMS. âdem- wake up.â
âlook at that nurse over there...â ricky insisted, folding his arms behind his head after he had gestured to the busty woman with black tendrils that spiraled from her scalp like barbed wire. â...doesnât she look like that chick from GREASE or...whatever? iâm trying to decide if iâd SMASH or PASS...but the freakish resemblance is kinda throwinâ me off...â
Although to many, the beauty was viewed as a slut, when all she wanted was somebody to fill that empty void of a black hole that had been left, CARVED into her heart⊠It wasnât that she actively went out looking for sex but all she really wanted, was for men to respond to her flirtatious behaviour and make her feel special, even if it was in just a simple lingual form. It just so happened, that if sex happened to be a part of the picture, then who was she to deny it? Girls had their needs too. Demetria could feel him levitating towards her, she could have closed her damn eyes and would have been able to sense his presence nearing. Whilst Richard had bared all immediately â which was different to how her relationship had formed with Aiden â she looked at him, as nothing more than just another guy, with his own issues. Demi was used to these kinds of men after all; they came along and did as they pleased, before fucking off and moving on. Whilst she had only ever let one take her completely, she tried to remain strong. Ricky couldnât exactly fuck her over, if she was only looking to him for a âno strings attachedâ relationship â the last thing she needed, was to dive in deep to the soul of another player who thought he called the shots. This was simply her current mindset though. Demetria would forever remember his break down and how she couldnât be there for him, like had been for her⊠Perhaps, that was why she was already trying to push it to the back of her mind and convince herself that he was just another âladâ; because she was NOT good enough to make him feel better, unless she offered her body.Â
Although he had opened himself to her; invited her in to see the blackened colour of his bloodstream, shown her just how heavily his heart had sunk into his stomach, all Demetria could see Ricky for, was your typical younger man. Did it bother her though? Not really. The brunette contained her own demons that she wanted to be rid of, at least for the night. Fingers led her in a dominating manner, FORCING her viridescents onto him â as if sheâd be looking away⊠Demi was fixated on Richard; she found him completely and utterly mesmerising and she had done, from day one. Allowing her tongue to roll over her lower lip, pinks dancing upward into her very own sensual smirk, she couldnât hold back the giggle that was tickling itâs way up through her vocal chords. Richard had managed to send a chill down her spine, which was still arched perfectly to reveal the chest that she was ready for him to pounce onto. The downfall to her disorder, was that she almost always made herself appear to be provocative, just for the attention. The good news though? She knew just how to angle her position so a man like Ricky, would only desire her more⊠It was sad, really. Having to sexualise herself continuously, just to feel a shred of confidence because she knew she was getting attention.
âYou know, do you?âÂ
Forearms fought their way up to his nape, her lungs becoming filled with the clouds of seduction that polluted the air around them; giving them a high of nothing but ecstasy, in the dream world of what they were going to do to one another. ANYTHING to make them forget the dreadful things from their past that they had begrudgingly dug up and laid out on the pavement for the world to see. Although the pair had seen one anotherâs souls naked, they hadnât fully seen each other in the buff â maybe, they would have gotten there last time if Holmes hadnât so rudely barged in.Â
âWhy donât you show me?âÂ
Words were now smooth like velvet, pouring out from her mouth in a whisper as hazels twinkled up into his direction suggestively. She had been waiting for this DESPERATELY. Fingers wound their way along the collar of his shirt, tearing it off from his torso and carelessly tossing it onto the floor, body stretching upward with no time to waste. Demi barely paid any attention to the silver-crossed-with-white lines and bumps that had destroyed his canvas; it wasnât something that was new to her. In fact, she had seen it ALL with Aiden and if she had learned anything from their encounters, it was to never show pity. After all, this pair had done everything they could to pretend their conversation had never happened â all they wanted was to be lost in one another, in another world that she and only he existed in. Rose petals clashed their way against his own lips, sending the both of them into an oblivion and not caring about the wreckage ahead; a BATTLEFIELD, arrows flying left-right-and-centre, whilst the knights charged at one another with their swords drawn. This collision was bound to end in nothing but more confusion and harm, but who CARED? They were finally getting the taste of one another and the escape that they were both yearning for.
no emotions attached and hollowed out like a chocolate santa ( SHARNA!!!!!! ), ricky began to feast on the lust the other was supplying him with, pressing his hands against her back and forcing her smaller figure against his own. his shirt was now on the ground, bare torso littered with a strange pallet of tattoos and markings exposed for her mind to. his hands pressed under her shirt, quick to rest to her breasts while impatient lips took over the kiss. rickyâs movements lacked any sort of delicate nature, as he had LITTLE concern for being romanticâŠdemi meant NOTHING to him. she was a body- a good looking one. a doll with a voice box and an eagerness to get into his bed just as badly as he wanted her there. a response to her words came in the form of a growl that crawled up his throat, impatient hands working at the fabric of her shirt, only parting to toss it carelessly over his bare shoulders. so many times he had thought about her, so many times he had come so close to marking porcelain flesh, so many times his cravings went unsatisfied due to unpleasant circumstances- now the time was FINALLY his. finally theirs.Â
rickyâs hands were swift, having perfected the motions, pads of his fingertips invading bellow the underwire of her bra, grinding denim-clad hips forward into her own. their height difference quickly became a problem, though, so ricky allowed his palm to graze along the plane of her stomach, curl around her hip and press against the small of her back to offer her support. using his weight, he forced her back onto the mattress behind her, grinding himself down on her as he held his weight with his other hand. their lips had separated for a moment, but it wasnât long lasting, as his went hunting for hers after a mere second of being d i s t a n c e d.
âiâm gonna fuck you SO HARD you wonât remember anyone's name but MINE.â
and that was a promise ricky fully intended to keep. he took a breath before beginning to ATTACK the skin of her neck with vicious, desperate movements. nothing about what he was doing was CAREFUL- cautious. ricky didnât give a fuck about treating her like a princess or making her feel loved; his only intent was to FUCK her as he said he would. better than her EX. ( BUT from what it sounded like, aiden was a piece of selfish shit with a small dick. so that wasnât really a challenge ) ricky would ensure that demi not only FINISHED- but she finished more than once. he drew back, moving a hand to cup her jaw, forcing her irises to meet his- murky chocolate pools that ebbed with lust and DESIRE. âhow rough do you want it, princess? how BAD?âÂ