Tell Everyone I Said Hi

I live in the Midwest and chronicle sadness. I listen to a lot of music, watch a lot of mixed-martial arts, root for the Cubs, and love words. var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-32809585-1']); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })();

[sadchimpson]

I want Jane to read all of Trump's tweets using the Snapchat duck filter.

[sadchimpson]

As Theo said: Champagne is the best smell in baseball.

[sadchimpson]

I got lost for a bit this afternoon in Burlington, Iowa.

[sadchimpson]

Hanging out on the set of the most boring and predictable movie ever made. #snapseed (at Charley's Grilled Subs)

[sadchimpson]

I think Jane might have figured out how to make America great again, via Donald Trump.

[sadchimpson]

That time Disco photobombed my bedroom shoot with Foxtrot. #tbt #catsofinstagram

[sadchimpson]

Bourbon, kitties, a couple of selfies, my commute. I was probably more faithful to Instagram in 2015 than any other app on my phone. #2015bestnine🌟

[sadchimpson]

Tired of all this yet? You ready to go home? (at Burlington, Iowa)

[sadchimpson]

Janey made some new curtains for the bedroom and then rearranged some things to create this little reading spot, which Foxtrot immediately found and occupied. #catsofinstagram #snapseed

[sadchimpson]

Our Christmas morning tradition: lox with cream cheese--and capers and lemon juice and red onion--on rye points. Plus scrabbled eggs with goat cheese and fresh-from-the-garden, in December, chives. And, you know, potatoes. Happy holidays, y'all.

[sadchimpson]

It's Christmas Eve, and Frosty finally came to see me. #nekoatsume

[sadchimpson]

My story "Woodwinds" appeared online late last year in Newfound, and it's now been included in their second print issue, which is a beautiful thing and also includes stories by Danielle Susi and David James Poissant.

[sadchimpson]

Here is my amazing mother-in-law, Vic, conducting the cantata, which featured a fantastic performance by niece Mia, this morning. Note 1: She's missing a pinkie. How great of a conductor might she have become with all ten fingers? Note 2: The clock on the wall deservedly haloing/sainting her. #latergram (at United Church of Woodhull)

[sadchimpson]

To steal Jane's line: Everyone in small Illinois city heartbroken after discovering what they thought was a Sonic was actually a new car wash.

[sadchimpson]

Janey made us some amazing food to eat while we scoff and cry our way through this debate: ahi sesame tuna, braised cabbage with edamame, and black rice.

[sadchimpson]

Where's Disco? or Somebody didn't want to be left out of the photo shoot, or My real-life #nekoatsume, with litter pans. #snapseed #catsofinstagram

[sadchimpson]

Guy Furry. #nekoatsume