Salem/Eddie

he/him i can be nice i swear

[salemisanerd]

INTRO TIME ‼️‼️

name: salem or eddie

pronouns: he/him

sexuality: bisexual, not really monogamous but also not into real relationships cuz i don’t do commitment very well (also incredibly freaky, you’ve been warned, but that’s probably why you’re here)

age: 18

interests:

fight club

the outsiders

sherlock (the bbc series)

elementary (a different sherlock holmes adaptation lmao)

80s movies (especially the brat pack)

matt dillon (movies he’s been in but also he’s just an interesting guy)

classic rock (especially styx and black sabbath)

theater

paraphile, radqueer adjacent, idc about contact as long as everyone is consenting, and honestly if it doesn’t directly affect me idc that much

oh uh i also probably have aspd or npd, fair warning, low empathy bullshit but i try to be decent

[salemisanerd]

i learned how to make balloon dogs and i think i should start giving them to anyone who does any kind of favor for me

OR i give them to the people i hookup with, like thank you so much for fucking me and leaving bruises, what’s your favorite color i’m making you a dog to show you my gratitude

[dailysoapshipping]

the hand placement.

[salemisanerd]

this shits why i haven’t been on here they’re trying to kill me with this i need to punch them both in the face for making me upset

[salemisanerd]

gonna have to kidnap you since u don't post anymore

hey no that’s mean don’t kidnap me

anyway high school is over?? very weird

[salemisanerd]

the victorians thought masturbation could make your uterus fall out?? i fucking wish bro

[salemisanerd]

i met a guy and neither of us want an actual relationship but after meeting up with him a couple times my dumbass brain is getting attached- to be fair he’s one of the sweetest people i’ve met pretty much ever AND he’s super compatible kink wise so like what did i expect-

[salemisanerd]

miss you dude, I need you back here for horny reasons <3

oopsies i forgot i had tumblr again, to be fair i also haven’t really been active on any social media aside from mindlessly scrolling on tiktok-

[salemisanerd]

miss you dude, hope you're well 💜

oh yeah i still exist on here i forgot about that oopsies

i’m chillin :3

[salemisanerd]

thinking about the other day when multiple people genuinely thought that twunk meant “twin unc” and then me and another trans guy were like guys wtf is wrong with you and had to explain that a twunk is a twink/hunk

[salemisanerd]

brad pitt was in show choir and that knowledge makes me incredibly happy, i must find more people who were in show choir

[salemisanerd]

my dad bought spray cheese for my sister and i was flabbergasted cuz that was the first time ive seen that shit in person, like i knew it existed but i didn’t KNOW it existed

my sister then proceeded to put the stupid ass spray cheese between two cheese it’s and eat it

fuck ass plastic cheese in a can that doesn’t need to be refrigerated… i hate the concept of it

[cherrypikkins]

all these clothing stores with their 'boyfriend shirts', 'boyfriend hoodies', 'boyfriend sweatpants', 'boyfriend shorts' - every two minutes someone's poor boyfriend is being divested of his clothes for resale and left cold and naked and confused somewhere

[salemisanerd]

good, leave them all naked, they’ll either run off into the forest and make clothes out of leaves or someone will claim them as their fucked up dog

[salemisanerd]

what would someone have to do to get you to post more selfies?

uhh idk, all my selfies look pretty much the same, mirror selfie wearing the same kind of outfit, almost always wearing a bandana, they’re kinda boring

[cathedral-of-blood]

I am going to go drunk driving without a licence I really want this fucking subway

[cathedral-of-blood]

I forgot I posted this and I also forgot where I put my sandwich

[salemisanerd]

okay well it’s comforting that you didn’t die but why in the actual fuck did you put your sandwich on a coat rack

[salemisanerd]

OMG I LOVE FIGHT CLUB, I HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE BUT THE BOOK REWIRED MY BRAIN

i kinda hate the misinterpretations of it but they can never take it away from me!!!!!!!!!!! MY BOOK MINE IT’S MY COPY

GET OFF ANON AND TALK TO ME ABOUT FIGHT CLUB PLEASEEEEEE

I HAVE TWO COPIES OF THE BOOK CUZ IM WEIRD (i have five copies of the outsiders so yk, could be worse) AND I HAVE THE COMICS WHICH ARE KINDA CONFUSING BUT I STILL ENJOY THEM

I PREFER THE BOOK BUT YOU SHOULD STILL WATCH THE MOVIE BECAUSE ITS GOT SOME COOL STUFF WITH TYLER APPEARING BEFORE THE NARRATOR KNEW ABOUT HIM, SPECIFICALLY PLAYING INTO HOW TYLER WOULD SPLICE FRAMES INTO MOVIES, TYLER ESSENTIALLY SPLICED FRAMES OF HIMSELF INTO FIGHT CLUB AND ITS SUPER COOL (also supposedly there’s a starbucks cup in every scene but i keep forgetting to look for them every time i watch it-)

[salemisanerd]

sitting in a parking lot with fake blood on my face (specifically dressed as eddie from rocky horror) and hoping it doesn’t look real enough that someone gets concerned

(i sent my dad in to get me a slushie)

[salemisanerd]

i have an audition today that i haven’t prepared for so they’re gonna hear me sing extraordinary from pippin for at least the second time for an audition with them because i know i can do it well-

they love me tho so it’s okay i’ll be more than happy with ensemble and even if i didnt audition they’d be like uh where are you??