noelleon

[ozu-teapot]

Leonor | Juan Luis Buñuel | 1975

Liv Ullmann

[vulturehooligan]

I shall find a quiet pool in the forest and I shall be alone there often. I shall gaze into the deep, still water and that stillness will be in me. I shall sleep by my pool and dream, and I shall leave you messages in oracles and poems. Or you may dream with me, (for you are as much myself as I am you and your dreams are also my dreams) you may join me and wait through the night till the animals come to drink. Then I will show you the shape changing and we will become the animals. My magick can heal, for it comes from the place where there is no separation and we are all one, where the water of the pool merges again and is lost in the ocean.

Soliloquy For Lilith - Nurse With Wound. (via victoriavictima)

[magictransistor]

Romare Bearden. The Family. 1975.

[samemiddlename]

I messed up..big time...with somebody I admire...now it's like poof..and I'm poof too, so it's mutual unmutualism --I wish my brain would stop feeding me messages with the words: they, hate, and you in other advancements I wonder if blogs not on the tumblr domain can be used similarly to tumblr I need a place to stuff nervous energy, hopes, mixed messages, a plethora of loss, etcetera I will still spell etcetera wrong in my journal, the next two months it's red and I think I should use it too

[samemiddlename]

my friend just got called cute and im smiling / ready to blast off :))))

[samemiddlename]

leave me alone but don't leave me forever lonely finish your sentence but don't call me back color the last page but do give it back i'm not supposed to be with someone when i'm besides myself a mirror reflects two same bodies, I keep it on a hidden shelf you'll find it so much easier to love me once a month, but i can't promise i'll blame anyone, except me, thats its fault

[samemiddlename]

fruit loops and sugar and I read somewhere that when your running climbing skating whatever if you eat some starburst or candy it can give you a boost! 

[samemiddlename]

when you leave a space you created dormant..is it okay to come back? every time i'd see those quotes that say things like "people leave etc" i would also remember the girl scout song tucked into my folded hands with other eight year olds in brown vests "a circle is round, but never ends, that's how long I [am going] to be your friend." (originally "want") Its unsettling to know that friends or people you haven't stayed as close with are not at fault, you as well as them did not try to fall into this, secretly turning a back on the promise to be friends "forever." Strange that if I get to 50 I'll remember them by name but it will be impossible to recall experience, recent, practice, because in hindsight we were roller-coasting a new ride a new coaster to points in the graph unhypothesized, and to not know if there would be a forever but to hope for one, was the energy bar, the battery, the nine lives. infinity was easier to picture with someone we liked, someone we'd trade lunches with, someone we'd hope to share all 80 years of forever with. Until forever became the end, and the forever was a dark room without enough glow to see if that 7 year old you called best friend was still holding your hand.

[samemiddlename]

spider on mi wall

ideas still in mi head

cold ice water bottle

open door

time for bed

ick, orange melatonin

that makes me sleepy way past my 6 am alarm

oops i’ll only grasp half of the lecture because the first half was spent doing brain calisthenics 

[samemiddlename]

mostly i just wanna come up with and draft some chapbook ideas run a half marathon speak french everywhere i go dance in places i get nervous: grocery store, some trains, walks when its dark be unrecognizable aka a whole new level in mi life get into vcu and find cool poopies in rva and make granola to send to my big sis in chicago this isnt rlly resolutions also i need to find another day job and a summer job swish.gurgle.spit.

[samemiddlename]

i look at my watch during the day and smile at its colors. its winter my nose is in five journals at once i drink about 7 cups of hotness and steam and my hands are using new muscles so i can write letters longer than a couple pages.

[samemiddlename]

lawnmowers, calmnowers

[samemiddlename]

its not rational nobody hates you nobody hates you!

[samemiddlename]

im not sure but this town had artificial stars and most ppl on the train lay with their backs against the window and feet lounging both seat cushions. the conductor was quite young and had a mustache and smiled with their bottom teeth only reminded me of an older person i know who's struggling with dementia. i have a lot of fight in me to complete my goals but lately all im writing seems to be slushy sad poems and to do lists that are never even half done and small sketches of badly drawn noses and hands. medium.medium.medium. im trying to take notes on what is genderless..specifically sound and time and light but is a cough? is a hum? is a laugh? the train hummed while it stopped to let more people on and across another (lit up) train was moving and on it there was one white haired person and if i squinted forward i felt like we too were moving, swimming alongside this train, like a synchronized school of fish, i hope to get parallel with good ppl, and to also converge and meet my perpendicular when the universe allows it 2016 scares me mostly because even number have always felt too purple and too mean in my stupid head but i am gonna get more comfortable and uncomfortable and pitch ideas and make poetry zines and write songs and send letters n postcards and hopefully wrap up and start up lotsa ideas!! simply, making is my goal, or perhaps molding.

[samemiddlename]

cant really draw but i try

[samemiddlename]

you know you’re fine, with you’re with me

[pbs-r]

WHEEE WHEE WHEE ALL THE WAY HOME SOON ENOUGH

[samemiddlename]

yr already a superhero but you can also fly?! *finds some moss to lie down on*