As Iâm writing this, itâs about 9:30 pm, the 5th of December. Iâm not going to really que this for another day, though, so I have time to fix this, add people, maybe even delete it.
      Chances are though, that if youâre reading this, Iâm already gone. But thatâs okay. Iâll have already said my farewells to a majority of you- those who I know will at least understand. Iâve been around for a couple months here on Kureto, about twice as long on my Yoichi. Many of you know me better as my Kureto, though. Some of you have known me since my days in Ao no Exorcist, but none of you can recall my days in Fairy Tail or even the W.o.w fandom, but thatâs not really important.
      Iâve been asked frequently over the past few hours why Iâm doing this. My best answer is that Iâm a waste of space-- but thatâs only half the story. There are multiple reasons why. Each one worse and probably even more stupid than the last, but a  reason for me to carry this out regardless of what others may think. I could go on telling you all my life story, maybe throw in my hopes and dreams and drag this out longer than it should be drawn out, but I wonât.
      This is a farewell. A good bye to each and every one of you. Past this point are messages to a few different people I want to give a personal, public good bye to.
      Iâm glad we became friends, and Iâm thankful for our late night talks and being able to read your novel (even if by only a few chapters) and get to know you. Iâm also happy that youâve found a equally strong, lovely woman to live with and love and cherish-- something I really wanted you to have. Khaylinn, youâve helped me multiple times before, prevented fights, and youâve even managed to make me choke on my own spit from laughing so hard.
      You were right. We canât save everyone. But thatâs okay, because sometimes, people donât want to be saved. You were a mother to me, someone I loved and practically raised me even when I didnât call you mama or something like that. I remember you introducing me to Ons, and listening to me cry and panic over Mika and Akane, which has convinced me that youâre a sadist in every way. I also remember you helping me with a few different replies, from violence to lowkey gays beinâ gay. But my favorite memory is you helping me feel better about something that happened when I was 10... for that, I am grateful.
      I loved playing video games with the two of you, honestly. You guys are my weebish anime parents, the Canadian maple leaf beavers who have made me laugh multiple times. You were both there for me when my cat died, and Gurn, who has been there for me more times than I can count on one time, even made me feel like I mattered a few times. You both helped me forget that I was miserable, which I am grossly thankful for.
       Marisa, I canât... I canât express how I feel... so Iâll talk about the times weâve texted about OCs, rambled on about video games, and giggled madly at some memes. Youâve been there for me, been there for Khaylinn, and have been there for others as well, without even really realizing how helpful you were. Youâre like a big sister to me, actually, and wish I couldâve held you at least once... but thatâll never happen. Thank you, Nee-san.
       We havenât known each other for long, honestly, but I did want to tell you that I appreciate your kindness, and thank you for giving me a bit of confidence every now and then.
To Sheska, my big sister,
       Iâm sorry I couldnât stick around to see you publish your first novel, or hug you, or spend a second Christmas with you or go live in the woods in Canada and hide away from society like we planned. Iâm sorry I couldnât laugh with you a little longer or talk about our ships or anything like that. Iâm sorry for being a lousy younger brother, and for leaving you behind.
       Amare, youâre smart and wonderful. You have so, so much potential, and I need you to keep Lulu safe. Sheâll be hurting, as sheâs declared over IM, and sheâll need your support the most. Have a good life, my dear.
       Youâre somewhere. On a plane or in a car or maybe still at home, youâre somewhere. You wanted to save me, because I saved you, but you didnât have to. You donât need to. Iâm so sorry you feel this way, and I wish I could hug you and tell you once more itâll be okay, but I have a feeling you wonât ever believe itâll truly ever be okay.
        8am my time. Youâre on a call with me. You donât know that Iâm writing you this message, and thatâs okay. If you knew, youâd probably break down into tears again and I donât want that. I asked you to be there for Lulu while Iâm gone, to which you said yes, you would. Iâm grateful for that. Earlier, you asked me to wait for you where ever we go when we pass on. I wanted to say I couldnât, that thatâs not how death works, but then I realized, I donât completely understand death. No one understands it or knows what happens, but Lis, I will wait for you. Iâll wait, and Iâll see you again in another life time. I promised, and I donât intend upon breaking that promise.
        Thank you.
        You two were my saving grace freshmen year, and unknowingly helped be stick around for as long as I have my sophomore year. Youâre amazing teachers, and amazing people equally. Drama 1 and Advanced Drama helped me feel like I belonged, even when people began to fight, and say you two were biased or rude or favored others, I still felt at home in Mrs. Moiserâs class room. Mr. Moiser gave some of the warmest, most fatherly hugs, too. You were my Drama parents, and Iâm sorry to leave without seeing your next performances. But most important to this farewell that I bid you, is that Iâm thankful for knowing you, because you were kind, yet strong willed, and amazing teachers (even if I never really got to see Mr. Moiser teach, when he was directing Voices, it was like teaching, to me at least ahah.)
        Each of you were great friends, not always kind, not always considerate, but friends who at least tried to understand. Coyote, you were one of the first people who I came out as trans to. You did struggle a bit, but after a little more time, you stopped slipping up, and it filled me with joy that at least some of my 8th grade buddies could accept me. Makar, I donât remember how we met, and that actually bothers me, but when I finally mentioned to you I was a boy and not a girl, you said okay and went with it. Andrew, youâre a great team leader. Youâve managed to actually turn me into a productive (although still sorta lazy) artist. You called Coyote on his bullshit, memed with us, and trusted me with your laptop, which means a lot because I myself am very, very paranoid. Anyways, thanks for being my friends, and being supportive of me in the end. I hope my final pieces of art are good enough for the game, and you all get an A+ or smth. See ya in the next lifetime, nerds.
