who else is up permanently feeling like they did something Wrong
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@sangura
who else is up permanently feeling like they did something Wrong
what doesn’t kill me leaves a pit in my stomach that never goes away
*imagines myself dying in brutal, violent ways as a form of coping*
swinging rapidly from "maybe i'll be okay" to "it never gets better" every damn day
i literally hate being alive and going through the same motions every fucking day.
sorry if i disappear. i don’t wanna be here anymore.
please don’t get attached to me i’m going to kill myself one day
unfortunately i remember everything and it will sit in my chest forever.
unfortunately im better as a concept and ruin everything eventually
"what's wrong?"
i have very big feelings and they all boil down to “i need to fucking die right now.” lmao
time to feel sick about every decision i’ve ever made in my entire life
-why are you doing this?
-because i hate myself so much that i sabotage my own happiness
-so you want to do this?
-no
-but are you aware of what you're doing?
-thats the neat part. i am.
None of this would’ve been an issue if I just killed myself at 16
I’ve been pleading with the void to take me but it keeps spitting me back out like even death doesn’t want me
People think I overreact, but they don’t understand that even silence feels like abandonment when you’ve been left too many times.