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My feelings.

Sad, lonely, waiting.

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Staying and waiting.

Ever since I got back to the city. You're the only one that I'm looking for. The only one I'm thinking about. From the moment I wake up. To the time that I rest. You're the only one I see. I can't say that I don't love you, because if I say that. Then I'd be lying too you. I can't seem to get you out of my mind. But for some reason. I like it. I like the thoughts I have about you. Just to see you smile, even if it's only a dream. I'd say this again and again to you, and I hope you'd understand what I'm trying to tell you. I'd never lie to you. So I'm telling the truth. Because i meant every word that i said. Because when I said that I love you. I meant that I'd love you forever.

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Staying and waiting.

Ever since I got back to the city. You're the only one that I'm looking for. The only one I'm thinking about. From the moment I wake up. To the time that I rest. You're the only one I see. I can't say that I don't love you, because if I say that. Then I'd be lying too you. I can't seem to get you out of my mind. But for some reason. I like it. I like the thoughts I have about you. Just to see you smile, even if it's only a dream. I'd say this again and again to you, and I hope you'd understand what I'm trying to tell you. I'd never lie to you. So I'm telling the truth. Because i meant every word that i said. Because when I said that I love you. I meant that I'd love you forever.

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Perfect

I can't really get how can i make my life just right. I've been looking for happiness in the smallest of things. I couldn't find anything right. I can't seem to get myself together. Everyday is a step closer to another heartache and a bigger wound in my bleeding heart. I don't even know what to do with my life, but stand and stare at the ceiling in the dark, laugh and talk to myself. Anyway that's what crazy people do when they're lonely. I know I can never have a perfect life, because I'm not a perfect guy. How will I ever be the perfect man of my future family, my wife, and my children will need to depend on me. But I can't seem to do anything right. So I'll just accept it and move on with my life.

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Hungry

Food. Food. Food. Food. Food. Love!!!!

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What I feel

I am loosing my mind.

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Why?

This is a chapter in my life where I think I'm about to loose it. Where I think I'm about to give up. Where I can't find any silver lining in the storm. No rainbows. Just storm clouds. I've been waiting. But I guess all of you say that I'm insane for having 20+ split personalities. Then you keep telling me to stop coming to you but you want me to change. How do I change if I have nobody with me to guide me through these changes in my life. How do I follow if you are not even giving me any example? How do I remember to forget, if I forget to remember? Your comments were all negative. You don't really care about how I feel. You're single-minded, to think that I was possessed by demons. What if I just didn't want to listen? Because I didn't want to hear the opinions of a person who barely knew me. You only one the present me. But you don't know my past. What I've been through, Where I'm from, and Why I'm like this. If you say that I'm insane because I won't listen to you. Then listen to yourself. Talk to yourself in front of a mirror. Well thanks to you, I'm alone now. Without a care in the world. Just wondering when will I die.

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Walk Away

I can't stand the pain I feel inside. Being far away from you. Wanting to be with you. Wanting to stand right next to you. Is making me loose my mind. I try to stop my thoughts about you. But I can't stop but wonder about how your days have been. You're like a breeze that flew by. But I never really noticed. Like a gush of wind that makes me fall on my knees, so I start to crumble, stumble, then fall. I am soon to find out why and how do I love you. Because I can't help but wonder about how we even met. Was it in a box? Or with the flocks? I know I'm not crying now. Because I believe that I'm getting ready for bigger pain on the next time that we will meet each other. But I'm still gonna keep my hopes up and believe. Believe in more to come. Believe in second chances. I'll keep my hopes up, and head up high. Cuz I know the next time I would see you, would be a time where I will show my love for you. -이종수/Sapphire

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Please Forgive Me

I've spent these days thinking about you. Wondering wether you're alright, or not. Wondering if you're also thinking about me. You are all that I need now. I need you to turn my crazy world around. Your smile, your sweet sweet smile. I just can't get it off my mind. These days got me wondering and asking whether I should give up, or do I keep fighting my loosing fight. I know people say that we aren't meant for each other, that I'm not even supposed to be in your life. But I know what my heart really wants. All it wants is to be with you, and to hold you closely, where it will never let you go. I know I'm crying now. But I wish you would read these notes that were made especially for you. The only girl that I'm thinking and dreaming about. Please hear me out. Because, I promise, that no matter what may happen. I will always love you.

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I'm Addicted

The main question running in my mind is, "Do you think about me?" Or, "Do you even notice me?". I guess you'll never see how much I love you. Or how much you mean too me. I just want to believe that someday. You will love me, the way I love you. Since we met, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I couldn't get you out off my mind. "Is this what love really is?", I asked myself that. So now I guess I now know that it's true. I may not know "how" or "why". But I know that, I love you now. From this day forth. I will never give up on you. I'll keep fighting. I'll keep pushing myself to go beyond my limits. Just so you may notice me, and my love for you.

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Too Much

I believe that I’ve had too much now. Too much of this in my life. Too much thoughts, too much worries, and too much thinking. How do I stop this?

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Reasons Why

Until now I'm still finding out why I can't let you go. Why you're always in my mind. Why I can't stop thinking/dreaming about you. I know that I will meet you again someday. But now I'm just keeping my head up, knowing/believing that someday we will be together. Because I know, deep in my heart, we we're meant to be.

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All I need

I've been telling you how much you mean to me. How desperate I am for your company. I've been telling you how much you mean to me. How much I need you. I don't want to be with you, I need to be with you. All I need is your company. Just to hear the soft and tender whisper of your voice. All I need is you. At first I never really noticed, until I got struck by it. Until I found out that you were the one that I was looking for. All I need is to see your face once again. One more time. Even if it's the last. I just need you to know how much I love you. You tell me that we're not made for each other. But why does my heart tell me that we are. Why does it yearn for you. Why I'm always looking for you. But even though I know that I have no chances, I just need you to know. That I'll never give up on you, and that I'll always love you.

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Lost in Love

You can't tell me to stop falling further in love for you. Because, I've been in love for you too long. I know my dreams are impossible, but I can tell you that if I'll try to go the distance. Then I could be able to reach my dreams. My dreams of being with you, of being your man. I know that I'm lost in love, cuz I don't know much while I'm thinking out loud. When we fell out of touch. But now I'm back and eager to be what you'll want me to be. I've been following the Will of the wind, but I keep coming back too the Terminal, where I saw you and found your Diary. But now, I'm far and I need to mend this foolish heart of mine. This heart of mine can't stop thinking about you. So I'll just say, that I've loved you for so long. But you never knew how deep my love is. So these three words will just sum it all up. Three simple words that will complete all that I wanted to tell you. "I love you."

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Being Without You

Everyday, every night, you are always in my mind. You are in almost everything that I do. I always think of you. I want to scream to the world how much I love you. But I have this feeling that you won't even care. You are the one I love, but I know it's only in my dreams where I see that we're together. I know for sure that I will never be yours, and you will never love me the way I love you. But dreams are my reality. I'd rather stay asleep in my dreams with you, than wake up finding that I will never be yours. That you will never love me. Because you only see me as a friend. But still I just want to tell you that you're the most unique and special girl to me. You're more than a girl, you're a woman. I'll wait for you. I'll never give up. I love you.

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Getting rid of it.

I've been facing troubles regarding my sanity, heart and emotions these days. I can't seem to let go of certain things. Like how to let you go, how to fix friendships, and how to not loose a friend/loved one. But it usually ends up with me failing. I can't stand this anymore!😞