It's A(N)ice Life❅

Adventures in skating~ I started January 2017 after being inspired by YOI (◡ ‿ ◡ ✿) Current level: "Pre-Free Skate" (SO much work to do omg) Working on: Waltz Jumps, Mazurkas, Mohawks, Dutch Waltz

[sarsoora-skates]

Push, Push, Push

I will be honest... most of my focus when I practice is on things I learn from ice dance lessons. I know I need to be more balanced and work on a little bit of everything when I’m practicing to make sure I’m improving my skating in more than one area so I can see an overall improvement in all my skills. I don’t want to be a lopsided skater skill wise and that’s kinda where I’m headed at this point if I don’t shape up and get back on my basic skills track! 

I think I just wanted to be able to nail the first round of dances because my dance coach is going to be moving soon and I wanted to be able to test with him before he goes. Maybe that was a reach for me given how long it takes me to get the tiniest things but we DID manage to get the Dutch Waltz, Rhythm Blues, and the Canasta Tango pattern wise! Not with music yet and with some more tweaks and things I need to fix on my own but it’s still something! 

My practicing leading up to today’s dance lesson was somewhat obsessive. Last lesson, my coach had me do outside swing rolls (something I had neglected on individual skill practice) and he kept adjusting me as I went so I knew I had to work on my outside swing rolls until I got them down. It took a lot of trial and error but I eventually managed to finally work my body to a muscle memory point of understanding how to make it work without losing speed and maintaining proper shoulder counter change with each swing. Naturally, since I obsessively practiced that one thing over and over while trying to test it out in full pattern run through on my own, he didn’t ask to see them individually at all. Just my luck. 

We did a couple run throughs for the Dutch Waltz and Rhythm Blues to start. Major notes were my leg needs to stay in proper extension and I need to push harder. 

“I need you to push. I am carrying you across the ice!”

“I AM pushing! At least a some of that had to be me...”

“...”

“Okay, on a scale from 1-10 how much were you actually pushing me through?”

“Hmm... maybe 10+?”

“OH COME ON...”

“I am just kidding! It’s hard to say on a scale... Just push harder.”

Ask and I shall deliver. Wanting to prove myself has its advantages because next run through I was pushing a lot more and it was up to the coach’s standard. Then came the Canasta Tango... the dance I somehow managed to memorize in the midst of trying to perfect outside swing rolls. I was able to do the pattern without forgetting anything but as usual there are some tweaks to be made... and then there’s the awkward feeling of the reverse killian position. Not a fan but I gotta work on it to get better! 

Overall, today was a good lesson day. I don’t know when I’ll be seeing him again though so I guess I’ll just have to be more disciplined and push myself on my own. Even if my skating journey with him ends some day soon, I’m happy and thankful for everything he’s taught me this far and I wish him the best. 

For my own future practices, I think I’m going to keep a list with me of what I need to work on and try to focus my practice on going through that list to ensure overall growth for everything. I’m also considering filming myself so I can analyze what I’m actually doing and what I need to fix. 

Here’s to continuing to improve and grow as a skater! 

[sarsoora-skates]

Just keeping on~

Our last session for Learn to Skate group lessons officially ended today and needless to say, I didn’t pass. I feel like I used to be upset about not being able to pass certain levels but somehow it doesn’t really matter to me anymore? If anything, I actually appreciate being held back if it means I’ll have more time to work on what I need to in order to improve my skating. Realistically, I’m going to have to work on a lot of things on my own. I’m going to look up the list myself this time around and work on everything on my own and treat the group lessons more as a place of assessment as opposed to instruction. I may be a slow learner but I’m not giving up!ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

In other skating news... I have decided to take part in the rink’s annual holiday show. I keep thinking this is going to be a huge mistake and I probably shouldn’t be in it but I feel like I should push myself a little more to do things outside my comfort zone. In terms of skating in general, I need to go outside my comfort zone and not really care what anyone thinks or doesn’t think of me. I need to focus on my own growth and acknowledge even the littlest improvements.

Here’s to continuing to improve myself and my skating! ＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／

[sarsoora-skates]

1 vs 3

It’s been a couple of months into this ice dance endeavor and I’ve officially decided (against my better judgement perhaps) to try preparing what I’ve learned to test at some point when my coach has determined I’m ready. So now I’m going to have to finesse the rough spots on the three dances that are in the beginner tier for ice dance tests: Dutch Waltz, Rhythm Blues, and Canasta Tango.

Bring. It. ON. 

Technically, we haven’t gone through the Canasta Tango at all yet but that’s going to be coming up next. Either way, I’m determined to get them all down. I know I have a lot of things to fix with my posture but my coach did say he could tell that I’ve been practicing which made me happy so he doesn’t think I’m just messing around wasting both our times. Apparently, he wants to start running me through the Dutch Waltz with music next time too so that’ll be pretty fun I think!

With my skills coach, we worked on three turns and mohawks again which was well needed. I hate to admit this, but I’ve been so focused on the dance part I’ve kind of let the skills practicing slide off my radar. It’s been a little tough finding motivation when I’ve struggled with the same issues without feeling any real progress but I’m going to start balancing my dance and skills practice a lot better. If I want to grow as a skater, I have to do things that make me uncomfortable so I can get over the mental blocks and really commit to every move I attempt. It’s been an ongoing struggle to overcome mental blocks but I KNOW deep down I CAN do it so from here on out I’m not going to hold myself back. Maybe I won’t be as quick to pick things up but as long as at the end of a practice session I can say I honestly did my best, that’s good enough for me. If I’m still stuck, I’ll address it with my coaches and keep trying. Practice, repetition, and determination are going to be be the keys to achieving my skating goals. 

Also note to self: Stop being so stiff around the coaches and loosen up a little as well too TTuTT

[sarsoora-skates]

Failure is inevitable and it's the people who keep trying who become successful.

Mirai Nagasu

[sarsoora-skates]

Actually managed an inside Mohawk on one side!

It’s amazing the things I can actually do when my coaches aren’t around, PFFT! 

Now to figure out that cursed other side = w ///// ...

[sarsoora-skates]

Progressing... Kinda...?

So, this has been a WEEK... 

I’ve been coming home at almost 6 everyday from work when I supposed to be done at normally 4:30-5:00... Needless to say, I’ve been exhausted and both my studying and skating practice have suffered although I have been trying to squeeze in longer public session night skates on the weekend to make up for it. Honestly, my main focus for practicing has been to nail the Dutch Waltz elements because my dance coach is leaving soon and I really wanted to be at least half way decent with it before he leaves... Obviously not testing ready level but at least sufficient enough to keep finessing it out on my own. I worked on my swing rolls with shifting my shoulders instead of full arm changing as my leg comes around, forward stroking (he always loves to open with those), and progressives. 

Come our actual morning session, my brain is still fuzzy from my sleep schedule being thrown off this entire week. Like I can physically feel my brain being in buffer mode once I step on the ice and I can already feel that this coaching session is not going to be as successful as I hoped. Of course le coach is his usual friendly self and he says the one thing I was hoping he wouldn’t say...

Him: “So you’ve been practicing, are you going to impress me this week? :)” 

Me: 

We open with stroking and I’ve been practicing this so I’m SO ready to show him even though I know I’ve only been on this ice for two minutes and my legs always need a warm up period but I’m trying to be more confident in myself. Fake it until you make it, right? GAHAHAHAHAAAAAA... 

No. 

I instantly toe picked. Granted I didn’t fall but my internal state at that moment: 

Being the supportive person he is, he held my hands to make sure I didn’t fall over like a much less graceful baby giraffe taking its first steps. Apparently I’ve been practicing a lot of things wrong. With stroking and the swing rolls he wants me to remain on one foot with a brief bend and push onto the other foot in between. I didn’t even notice that I had a longer two foot period than necessary but now that I’m aware I can work on that when I’m going solo. Swing rolls were a little sticky too but after him doing a few tweaks he had me go down the long end of the rink on my own. I guess I must have been doing something right because I suddenly heard, “Yassssssss!” 

Overall, dance wasn’t TOO bad but I definitely still have some sticky spots to work out on my own. He said he DID notice an improvement so there’s a plus. Cut to today, I started doing mohawks with my skills coach. There was a LOT of hand holding because I’m a mess with mohawks... I just can’t seem to get my balance right for whatever reason. After a few tries we went from holding two hands to one hand. I was feeling like I was getting it... until she decided to let me go solo... UMMMM... UHUUUUUMMMM... The thing with me is once I’m comfortable practicing near the wall or with someone holding my hand it almost becomes like a crutch for me. Once she let go of my hands, I went from being able to do mohawks to basically this:

I wish that was an exaggeration but it was THAT bad. Yeah... -sighs-

I have somethings to work on this week though so I’ll just keep at it. It can only get better from here! I think main things to work on would be:

Stroking with a smoother transition between feet push offs (Bend, push, together)

Be more aware that I’m leading with the correct arm with swing rolls (and bend, push, together with these as well)

Making my progressives stop getting progressively worse as I get more speed (More bending here too)

Maybe practice foot transitions for the mohawk off the ice then bring it on the ice once the heel to heel feels more natural

Be more confident and just really go for it! No more holding back. 

Hopefully, I’m able to get my studying done early so I can skate the night session! 

[sarsoora-skates]

“Let it please be him, oh dear God It must be him , it must be him or I shall die, Or I shall die Oh hello, hello my dear God It must be him… BUT IT’S NOT HIM And then I die That’s when I die”

I am weak at how comedic and emotive this cover is! I LOVE IT.

[sarsoora-skates]

The little victories

Today I felt a little blue. There’s a specific instance that happened that left me feeling a little… Like, “What the hell am I doing here? I don’t belong here doing this with these people right now.”

When I started doing ice dance lessons with that one coach I’ve wanted to work with for awhile, the only times our schedules would match up was during freestyle. I had never done freestyle before and I knew that usually the REALLY serious skaters use that I’ve time for program runs, test coaching, moves in the field, etc. (basically all the really BIG stuff). Knowing the level I’m currently at, I’m not exactly the most apt compared to the other free skaters and I’m more likely to be in the way since so many patterns are happening at once. When I’m with my coach, I feel okay because I feel like I have some authority and purpose backing up my presence on such a session but I have yet to grow a pair and genuinely try a half hour session before the lesson solo because I’m still a little scared of being in the way somehow. That being said, today I decided I was going to actually try but due to not have exact change for an hour lesson and not being able to get up early enough due to not feeling 100% today, I opted for just the half hour time I usually get coached in.

Coaching went a little better than last week did. I’ve been practicing my swing rolls which had improved some and I found out I had been practicing my forward progressives wrong (woops). As we were going through progressives down the ice, another coach who speaks Russian said something to my coach in… Well, Russian. My coach responded back in the same language and it was a brief exchange that didn’t get to me until later. In the moment, I was more focused on practicing and getting it right but later it made me wonder if the exchange was along the lines of:

“____, you teach her dance?” “I’m trying.”

In some ways, that thought bothered me a bit because out of all my friends I’m like the least noticed person at the rink. This same Russian coach told a friend of mine he hoped to see her around more and other coaches have freely gone up and given my friends tips on things while I’m struggling with more basic skills in the background. I’m used to it but it still kind of sucks too?

At the end of the day, it probably doesn’t matter whether or not it was about me because I was honestly trying and putting myself out there. Even if I’m way out of my league and most of the coaches silently side eye me like I don’t belong, who is anyone else out there to make me feel like I don’t deserve things (including myself)? If I’m genuinely working towards a goal, why does what anyone else thinks matter? As long as I’m sincerely giving it my all, no one else should shake my purpose… Only my direct coaches get that privilege (PFFT). I am paying to be on that ice like everyone else and as long as I am working hard it’s justified for me to be there. Hopefully, next week I’ll buck up the courage and less programs will be running.

To combat my negative thought pattern, I’m going to name some little victories I should be proud of because it’s the little things that lead to the big changes. I have managed to learn the Dutch waltz pattern three lessons in and am now working on fine tuning some elements. I had the courage to try lessons on freestyle to begin with AND with the coach I wanted. In group lesson, I started getting Mohawks on my bad side and started learning forward/backward power pulls. I made my dance coach laugh a bit today by suggesting we dab our exit from the Dutch waltz pattern. Again, little things but they’re what’s helping me put myself out there to get where I want to be one days one step at a time both on and off the ice.

[sarsoora-skates]

Learning proper extensions for the Dutch Waltz like:

May my ass RIP (Rest in Peach 😭🍑)

[evgeniamedvedeva]

I opened my eyes and looked around and didn’t like what I saw. My only goal was skating at the Olympics and I had neglected every other aspect of my life. I realised I didn’t have many friends, nor interests despite being a versatile person. I had been living life practice to practice but in the winter when I was injured and unable to skate, I caught myself thinking, “Will this be my life after skating, living without friends, without hobbies and skills, without any semblance of a personal life, without anything?” I am a realist, I know I will not skate forever. So I changed that, I got more friends, new hobbies and interests, even a prerequisites for a future profession but my future is not set in stone. When I opened my eyes for the first time after the Olympics [free skate], life seemed to flow differently, not changing directions but it had become larger; my life turned from a stream into a river. 

[sarsoora-skates]

Things take time

When I first started, there was a part of me that wanted to be special. I would never openly admit it but I wanted to be noticed by some coach or be able to pick things up quickly and progress through the LTS (learn to skate) levels without a single problem. Looking back, that was really unrealistic especially considering I had to cling to the wall for dear life and it took me about 15 minutes to take one lap around the rink…

If I’ve learned anything this last year on the ice, it’s that there are certain skills that’ll take time. Some things will come easily and click right away and other things may take longer to get and push you beyond what you thought you were capable of doing. There’s nothing wrong with one way or the other as long as you keep practicing and don’t give up. Even when it feels like it’s never going to happen, keep trying. It’ll come eventually, and if it doesn’t don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and ask for help when you’re stuck. I’m pretty sure if I had been a little less self-conscious and reached out to coaches I wanted to work with sooner, I may have progressed further than I did.

Remember that everyone is on their own skating journey and you never know how hard other people worked on that thing that looks so effortless. Focus on your goals and work hard and you’ll get there one day too. Just don’t give up.

[sarsoora-skates]

A lesson in extensions

Dance Coach: Come to the wall. Now hold your leg like this... Flex here. Good. Beautiful. You are capable of doing this. Show me other side just like this.

Me: *holds my leg out the side for some god damn reason*

Dance Coach: ... You know how dogs go to the bathroom? Yes? That's what you're doing right now. Leg extension always behind you... Okay, better.

[aestheticcc-blog]

[mylittlebookofquotes]

Be strong, trust yourself, love yourself, conquer your fears, just go after what you want and act fast because life just isn’t that long.

Pam Beasley-Halpert; The Office (via mylittlebookofquotes)

[sarsoora-skates]

Finally Taking a Leap!

It's been over a year now since I've started skating and I've finally hit a skating wall. There's always been things I've struggled with but it was never anything a few focused public ice sessions couldn't help me get. Now I find myself doing the same things aimlessly without seeing any real progress... So after months of feeling like I wasn't ready, I've finally decided that it's time for me to start one on one coaching again. I had a coach once before but I was pretty insecure with my skating and I didn't feel like I was able to fully do the exercises she was having me do to the best of my ability. She was the sweetest coach but I just wasn't quite ready for coaching at that time even though I thought I was. Thankfully, I've come a long way with my confidence and I definitely can at least make more genuine attempts at doing what my coach asks of me. I know I'm still a little weak on some fundamental basics so I came back with a new coach who'll help me break down the nitty gritty parts and really finesse and strengthen those little things that'll help me come back that much stronger of a skater. For now, I'm working on crossovers and swizzle exercises in one on one and all the things I absolutely HATE in the pre-free skate adult class TTuTT (Mazurkas and Mohawks... Hng...) I have also made a VERY impulsive decision to start ice dance with a coach I've wanted to work with for awhile but was also too insecure about working with *SHOCKING*. The impulsive decision was driven by the news that he was going to be leaving our rink soon and I didn't want to have yet another regret over hesitating too long. Here comes the most clutzy looking Dutch Waltz to ever disgrace the ice! Having coaches give me something to work on each week is definitely going to get me out of the skater's block I've been facing because I finally have some focus in my practice again. Here's to continued improvement! *\(^o^)/*