‘ don’t apologize t’me, i ain’t the one gonna get hurt if you fall. ’ he simply stated, knowing how hard it was for her. trust him, he knew. kaneda couldn’t stand the loss his best friend / she couldn’t stand the loss of her love. it was painful to see her like that. he’d roll up his sleeves and was ready to fight a child who caused him to crash before this whole bucket of worms was knocked over. it was a weird night to a horrifying day ; there was a lot … too much to say … on his mind. he wasn’t the one who killed him … but he felt so responsible for him, his actions. he still missed him, his best friend. the only family he had. he sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets now that she had started talking. brown eyes stared at the ground, brows narrowing and pinching his expression. kaneda felt his heart grip a bit while the girl so broken started to explain her feelings. she couldn’t be here right now, there was too much happening for her. he sighed, avoiding eye contact while still shifting his head to see her.
‘ i get it, right ? it’s hard as hell, but you gotta know that he wouldn’t want this for you. ’ wasn’t easy. he looked like he was fine soon after, but his much rougher and angrier exterior could be blamed on his position as leader in the gang. but he’d cry so often out of frustration and anger in his private time. ‘ i get you. listen, kaori, you gotta know that just because you think y’er nothin’ doesn’t mean that you are. remember what worth you had to him / y’got that worth no matter what. ’ hand rested on the rail of the stairs, ‘ if it’s any consolation, i don’t think y’er nothin’. you made him happy, you brought somethin’ to him not a lot of other things did. y’got that charm about you. keep holdin’ somethin’ to ya’. he’s not gone forever, just … a long time. ’ a grumble of sorts before he started walking down the stairs / he wasn’t great with company right now, but she needed someone, he figured. and who was shotaro kaneda to leave someone like her upset ? ‘ let’s cut this shit / place’s pretty much empty, anyway. ’
kaneda’s words warms her heart. it’s a jagged sort of warmth, piercing even. a tolerable pain as she remembers tetsuo & how much he was the center of her life. perhaps she was just a foolish girl --- but without him, she felt incomplete & worthless. being told differently felt foreign.
perhaps it was because he was so much stronger than her, and she desperately needed someone to follow, but she easily traversed the stairs to stay by his side. kaori didn’t like the feeling of being in school --- it was run down and a mad house. but lately it just felt like a church in mourning. it didn’t do anyone any favors.
she manages a sheepish smile, looking at kaneda with hesitation. ❝ neither of us should be alive...but we are...❞ kaori is soft with her words, nervousness lace them, but so does gratitude. but she’s been so alone --- the company of a friend feels...fake.
so she hooks a delicate arm with his. it grounds her --- she feels real so long as she has the company of another. it’s timid & she’s probably annoying him...but the subtle constant shakiness of her legs is more noticeable. how fragile of a doll she is...she needs solid rooting.
❝ tetsuo...he wanted to run away...someplace far away.❞
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