dedication.

i want you to be happy. i'd bleed myself dry if it meant ensuring your happiness. can't you see that?

[sorenkingsley]

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ lvmier

         THE CONTENT OF THE channels she flipped through hadn’t escaped him for a second. Hasan’s silent as he watches the television flip from movie to movie, every line recited by the actors hitting him harder than he’d expected it to. He almost wants to ask her what was so bad about watching corny romance movies with her best friend. But he doesn’t.

        BECAUSE of course he knows what’s so bad about it.

         THE SCREEN GOES BLACK and he’s back to reality, huffing as he hauls himself up off the couch. No use dwelling on that right now. “Want me to look through the DVDs?”

        perhaps indulging in her collection of recordings that captured memorable events of their childhood would be a favorable solution to the intolerable heaviness in the atmosphere ; she could only hope reminiscing on the past would abate the cyclone of butterflies spiraling rampantly in her stomach . her long-lived feelings of stifled longing for what she did not deserve could at last be put to rest . . . or at least temporarily . 

        ❛   how about old family videos ? there’s already a dvd inside . just press play .  ❜ does it work to lighten the tension ? spoiler : nope !

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

         “SOUNDS LIKE A HARDASS….How are you supposed to focus on solving anything if he’s always nagging in your ear?” He manages to finish his pizza slice pretty quickly–But he knows that he’ll be reaching for just one more in about an hour. “If you do good work then what’s the problem, right?”

        FALLING INTO THE RHYTHM of being ‘just friends’ was just as natural as breathing. At the very least, Hasan’s glad that their relationship hadn’t appeared to be scratched or dented. “Sure. Find something good, though.” He lazily splays his body out on the couch, eyes trained on the television.

        she flips through the channels absentmindedly , attention centered on how earlier in the day , their precinct had practically erupted in celebration at her reappearance -- of course , this also gave rise to people questioning amongst one another as to why she left in the first place , or what had persuaded her into taking up her old position .

        the changes in her character following her return—— particularly her diluted but notable temper —— had incited debate to circulate throughout the office ; queries accumulating surrounding the cause behind the sudden shift in demeanor . why did that make her feel ... weird ? wasn’t she used to being the center of attention because of her trademark aggressive reputation ?

        and why had every channel she flipped through involve people making out or confessing ?

        ❛    pretending not to love you was the hardest thing i’ve ever done.   ❜         tap.            ❛    i just wish i could stop loving you.   ❜           TAP.           ❛    are people gonna see us ...? who gives a fuck ?   ❜           TAPTAPTAPTAPTAP.         ❛    i don’t want anyone else. i want you.   ❜

        she promptly shuts the television off. ❛   well. looks like there’s nothing good on.   ❜

[betterthankanyebitch]

[wnq-writers]

She’s intimidating and brooding And she scares people away, because She’s not made of sugar and spice and everything nice. But rather fire and lightening and everything frightening. People see the smoldering flames And the raging winds And they think that she’s strong. They think that she’s powerful. But really, she just tends to burn herself down.

beautifullytangled (via wnq-writers)

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

         HE NEARLY CHOKES ON his pizza in laughter– Of course, dealing with armed criminals was no fun, but armed illegal gondola racers? She can’t be making this up. “Bullshit. There’s no way.” His grin betrays his words–Hasan’s more than interested to hear about this very….special case. Watching her be so happy and full of life was only the cherry on top.

        “PFFFT–NEW YORK STYLE pizza missed you too! You have no idea how many people asked me where you went when I started going out by myself.” He shakes his head at the memory, taking a quick sip of his sweet tea. “It’s nothing but the same old, same old. Looks like the city likes keeping us busy.” He decides not to mention the difficulty he had with trying to solve cases without her. He’d like to keep things lighthearted.

        ❛    my interpol partner , on the other hand , was insufferable . a total stick in the mud . whenever i offered to wrangle up criminals with my signature flying back kick , he’d bitch me out !!    ❜ she can distinctly tally up the number of occurrences where said partner gave her quite the tongue - lashing ; their continual lambasting of her methods tarnished the cultural allure of italy for her . 

        ❛    deadass , you think i’m stuffy ? que putada , this guy lumbered around as if he had a fucking stick of genoa salami up his ass . we were completely incompatible ! he complained to my superiors about me so much , they told him to that as long as i did my job , he needed to piss off . his competence as a tactician couldn’t hold a candle to yours  tenia una cara de cullo .   ❜ hasan was substantially prettier , that was incontestable . 

        this was nice . this was normal . the tension from before had dissipated without her notice . she chews contently on the crust of her slice while reaching over for the remote control .  ❛    ah , you up to watch a late night flick ? i’m stuffed , please don’t ask me to get my ass off this couch.   ❜

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

        TO MENTION THEIR TRYST would mean they both would have to confront their feelings for each other–And Hasan had already made his known. Simply having his partner (and best friend) back and tackling cases with two heads instead of one was more than enough for him. He didn’t want to risk losing her again. And forcing a conversation that she wasn’t ready to have was the perfect way to do so.

        THE MOVEMENT OF HIS pen over paper ceases when Luciana interrupts him, usual smile on his lips. “Thought you’d never ask. Lemme get ready.” He always finds himself looking over case files while his coworkers are packing up and heading home for the day–Time’s been flying by much too fast.

        ❛   ━━ illegal gondola racing !! isn’t that fucking insane ?! just hours after being transferred to venice , i’m assigned to take care of people hotwiring gondolas and using them to race through the canals !!  ❜ she recounts the tale of her interpol capers with animated motions , narrating her accounts with lively hand gestures & detailing every case she took on with gusto . not even the unwelcoming arrival of new york’s forbidding winter could put a damper on her rather unusually high spirits . 

        ❛    that’s not all . these street-- mm, canal racers equipped their gondolas with weapons . imagine coursing down impossibly narrow venetian water channels at high speed while trying to evade their bullets !!     ❜

        upon reaching the conclusion of her little spiels , she heaves a prolonged sigh . ❛    as tasty as their calzones are , i really missed new york style pizza . . . god , i missed noodletown , too !! did i miss anything wild while i was away ?   ❜ she missed hasan most of all , but she never gives voice to such a thought .

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim:

        AFTER THEY BROKE APART, Hasan is left staring at her for longer than necessary, eyes half-lidded as if he were intoxicated. He knew she was in no way inexperienced, but to leave him feeling dizzy…He feels soundly beaten at his own game. In fact, he’d nearly forgotten Luci had to leave at all. “…Huh.”

        “…RIGHT. LEAVING. GETTING UP.” He suddenly pauses to think–With him being this turned on, and them being this close, she definitely must’ve felt his…Hasan rushes to his feet. “Yeah. Okay. Here, I’ll help you up.” Definitely time to go.

        memories of that impetous night conquered the forefront of her mind for several months with picturesque lucidity / each dredged recollection consuming her every waking thought until she’d bludgeoned it out of her consciousness by submersing herself into her work. it had been branded into her memory / forever imprinted with the permanence of an ink tattoo .  she’d fallen back into rhythm with her old routine at their precinct without trouble ; she basked in the comfort that not a soul was privy to the events that transpired the evening she returned / for she had resumed the role of hasan’s short - fused partner without betraying any hints to the underlying tension that bled into the glances they exchanged . she ignores how the chasm within her seemed to widened with each look , the comorbidity of longing and confliction had rived her mind in two ; what was she to do ? should she confront him ? or was it best to let sleeping dogs lie and continue on without resolution ?

        ❛    oi , cabezon. time to head home. i’m craving pizza for tonight , you down ?   ❜ her hand promptly slams down hard on the corner of his desk to seize his attention.

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

         A FINAL WAVE of relief crashes over him, a held breath released with an airy laugh–That is, until he refocused on the woman lying on top of him and felt a surge of heat replace the tension in his body. Hasan suddenly switches their positions, legs on either side of her own as his voice takes on a much darker tone.

        “LAST TIME, HUH? Alright.” He captures her lips again for the third time that day, but this time his goal is obvious. His tongue doesn’t hesitate to search for hers, teeth toying with her bottom lip before going right back in for the kill  He means to make this their most sensual, intimate kiss–It was only fitting for their last, right?

        feigning self-reservation was a fruitless effort ; if he was going to pour his heart and soul into what she believed would be their only opportunity to express their formerly entombed affections , then she found no reason as to why she couldn’t indulge herself as well .

        as soon as his tongue infiltrates past her mouth , she catches it between her lips , suckling with particular carnality reminiscent of something far more obscene ; indecent in every respect . she hooks her legs around him to tug him closer ; she deliberately plays with the volume of her moans without seeming insincere; she definitely wasn’t faking her enjoyment. all good things , regardless of the amount of delight it induced , had to come to an end , and she draws it to a close after what felt like paltry seconds . ( in reality , it had been at least fifteen minutes . )

        snrk. ❛   that’s enough. time for me to take my leave, for real this time.   ❜

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

         HE KNOWS THE telltale signs of her anger and smiles to himself–He knew now. She only started getting this mad after her kissed her. She hadn’t rejected him, she hadn’t hesitated to move her lips against his…He knows now.

        HIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT is harshly interrupted by his back painfully meeting the floor however, arms reflexively tightening around her. “Oof–” Luckily, it didn’t kill his enthusiasm one bit.

        “R….REALLY? YOU’RE SERIOUS?” Violet eyes widen, a grin beginning to tug at his lips. “You’re staying with me?”

        no reprehensible misdeed went unpunished . by lending charge to her brazen gut instincts , she was welcoming retribution into an open embrace. she will learn atone for allowing herself to be driven by her decadence - bitten vices .  ❛    i’m going to stay.   ❜abound with newfound temerity , she props herself on both elbows , leering her companion beneath her with half-lidded eyes , heavy with honeyed - indelicacy .

        ❛   this will be the last time we ever do this. make your final kiss your best before i go home.   ❜

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ atelouus

       “aww shucks —— you’re too kind, luci ! i like being optimistic, is all ! and i what i said is all true too, anyway.” luci did have a beautiful smile, and he’d love to see her smile always ! he softens at the mention of his wife — affection running through his veins instantly. “i do, with all my heart and soul. oh, no — ! if anything, i’m the jealous type, haha. but if anything does happen, we’ll talk it out, discuss it. communication’s important, after all.”

        ❛   trust is a fundamental staple of a stable relationship , huh . . . ? living in comfort with the knowledge that your lover is faithful . if your wife were to have a friend that she really , really enjoyed spending time with . . . that wouldn’t bother you , would it ? because you trust her .    ❜ leveled timbre suddenly adopts an underlying grave tenor , her expression hardening as features grow frighteningly dour with her queries . you wouldn’t have reservations surrounding the fidelity of your wife , right ? don’t lie . . . this portion , of course , remains unsaid .

[savagebled-a-blog]

        ･｡ﾟ ◜ how can you not love becca&eileen tho ,, real talk ,, bless @faillte

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

       ALL OF HIS DOUBT washes away. She wanted more. He wasn’t the only one. This feeling he’d held inside, this fire–Luciana felt it, too. Hasan doesn’t stop to answer her question. He kisses her harder this time, more confident in his actions than he was previously. She wanted more. They wanted more.

      A PART OF HIM ACHES when he remembers the heartache of his past. All the nights they’d spent arguing, insisting that him and Luciana were only friends and that there was nothing to worry about–Was he lying? With his ex-partner now in his arms, face red from their previous kiss–Was he lying?

      “–BECAUSE I love you.” He says it without thinking. He almost wishes he could take it back, because it’s all too much for them at one time, one thing after another–But at least she knows. If one of them needed to have their cards laid down on the table, Hasan would be more than ready to be the first to lay them out.

        it comes as no surprise that she returns his interest in her tenfold / but to speak her thoughts into existence was another matter entirely . his unforeseen confession of amatory adoration wrecks havoc on her mind / how dare he undermine her integrity ? all the principles she abided by , all the morals she constructed and adhered to, they were being sabotaged before her very eyes , and it was all his doing . had he formulated this plan anticipating her eventual reappearance , knowing the rate of success was high ? at last comes the declaration of his feelings , but surely he’d undergo the painful aftereffects of talkers’ remorse . remorse is her mother’s tongue ; she speaks of dolor with such fluency , what with all the predicaments she and hasan found themselves in during their youth .  

        her arms loop around him with the grace of a sylphid , though she smolders quietly in anger . even with his second kiss , his affirmation causes her fury to bubble over , muscles twitching as she digs her nails into his shoulders , her wrath driving her to lunge at him , sending both their bodies falling to the floor. 

       ❛   i wish i could kill you .fine,  you win , alright ? i’ll fucking stay.     ❜

[trapcard]

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[funkpunkandrollmuhfucka2]

Visit Original Link

Aaliyah - One in a Million (1996, Blackground/Atlantic Records)

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

       SHE DIDN’T REJECT HIM. She didn’t slap him, or blatantly tell him she didn’t feel the same. She kissed him back. She actually…wanted to kiss him, too. His heart flutters free in his ribcage, weightless and warm. Hasan almost moves to kiss her again–But stops himself instead.

      “SEE? THERE’S the Luci I know.” He laughs–low enough for only the two of them to hear. He’d nearly forgotten what it felt like to hear her call him names again. His smile drops slightly. With her gone, he would slowly forget it entirely… “…I’m gonna miss you. Everything about you.”

        these wretched circumstances called for at least a modicum of modesty on her part ; there needed to be a semblance of restraint by either party , and had she let loose the reigns restraining her from lunging at him  —— catastrophe would loom large in the horizon . she had to curb her debauched impulses and rein them back . the purpose of her abrupt reappearance was initially to say farewell , and now . . . splendor - bled grief  takes up residence within the fissures of her spine , finding home in the crevices of her moth - eaten , weathered down heart . more , more , more , she wants more of him  ——!!

        alas , the ferrous , biting voice of his ex - husband cuts thorough her thougths once more , spouting and prattling off acrimony on how he was right ; there was something going on between them . they’d confirmed his suspicions , despite initially believing them to be unfounded and ludicrous .

        ❛ …  hasan , why ? … why would you do that , knowing i’d want more of it ? you fucking asshole . . to kiss me knowing i’d force myself hold back ——!!    ❜

[savagebled-a-blog]

॰ . *✩ ･｡ﾟ ◜ caiiim

         DON’T GO, DON’T GO. His body screams at him to stop her, to desperately buy more time with her–And with one brief afterthought, Hasan finds himself holding her tighter, hand holding her chin up to face him. There’s something he needs to do. If this is the last time they’ll be together, there’s one last thing he needs to do.

        “LUCI. One more thing.”

        THERE’S NOT MUCH distance between them to close–But Hasan does it anyway, lips melded against hers in a wordless ‘I love you’. He’d always kept this feeling to himself, a bottled up emotion that could hurt them both if he ever made it known. But if he was to lose his best friend, he would lose her with a weight off of his heart.

        she comes to the shell-shocking realization that her iron-clad pride in their unchanging friendship had been laughably misplaced ; it was downright laudable how well she’d deluded herself into thinking things would remain ever-lasting . the rapid palpitations of her heart fell into rhythm with a discordant , wondrous symphony as his lips settle onto hers — having been robbed of experiencing genuine love for so long , starved of moonkissed intimacy that benumbs the senses — his kisses spin her mind into drunken delirium , the hand tucked her chin akin to the saw-toothed brambles of rosebushes .

        warm , warm , so warm  . it steals the air right from her lungs , so affirming and commanding . and yet , such a delectable taste birthed sepulchral self - hatred from under the bones of her ribs . and yet , she finds herself responding to him , with equal ( if not more ! ) immoral enthusiasm . but much like this visit ( her one and only ? ) , this dalliance is brief and cut - heinously short . her hands shoot out to shove him away .

        ❛   . . .  you’re so . . stupid . . .    ❜