Timeline: 2024 December 7th, Saturday, 6:32 P.M
Location: Spectrum Lounge & Bar, Bangkok.
Mood: They're both a little sad
Attire: See this post for Anon and this post for Boon
With: @boonpiratana
Anon glanced up from where he was staring at his wine glass, the familiar, deep voice of his friend P'Boon drawing him out of his guilty and self-pitying thoughts.
"P'Boon," Anon said, straightening in his seat as he watched the actor hesitate for a moment before settling in the chair opposite him. It had been a good couple of months since Anon had seen his friend in person - of course he kept up with Boon's life on social media, but he had been the one to say they shouldn't talk anymore. "How are you?"
Boon looked at the table, where Anon had already ordered him his favourite beer, as well as a few snacks and appetisers for the table. The actor sighed, taking off his sunglasses and tucking them into the pocket before lightly scratching the back of his head. "Yeah, I'm good." Boon said with a nod. "Been busy. New project and all."
"I heard. BL, too?" Anon inquired, one of his eyebrows raising slightly. "Do you... wanna talk about that?"
"Maybe later," Boon said, relaxing back in his seat and picking up his beer, taking a sip, his eyes not leaving Anon's. "I'm more interested in whatever it is you want to talk about. We haven't spoken in a while. So... why am I here, Non?"
Anon sighed, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table, a tired expression on his face. Boon couldn't say that he had seen Anon look so... downhearted. Crestfallen. Defeated, even. It didn't suit the heir, who walked around with all the confidence of the world in his stride. "I miss you," Anon finally admitted, his voice soft. "It's been a hard few weeks and... I've needed a friend, really. And I would normally message you but it's my fault we're not talking in the first place."
"Yeah," Boon agreed, crossing his arms defensively, the hurt evident on his face. "For a reason I still can't understand."
"it was a stupid reason, I suppose," Anon said. "But I just... I really wanted things to work with P'Red after his accident. And even though I'd never tell him about us - because of course I would never expose you to anyone - I didn't want to risk lying to the man I love while he was going through such a hard time."
"The memory loss..." Boon softened, watching as Anon rubbed at his temple and nodded in defeat. "He still doesn't remember you, huh?"
"No," Anon replied, his voice quiet. "He doesn't."
"I'm sorry, Non. That's not an easy thing to go through," Boon told him, reaching out to hold onto his friend's hand. Anon glanced at their connected fingers, watching as Boon squeezed his hand in comfort, silently waiting for the other to continue - it appeared he had a lot to get off of his chest.
"Actually... I tried to break up with him."
Boon's eyes widened in surprise. "Really?" He asked. "Because he doesn't remember you?"
Anon hesitated to answer, sucking his lower lip into his mouth before he let out yet another sigh, heavier than the last. "Sort of. You see, P'Red believed me after his accident, when I told him that we were in love. It was... it was so nice, P'Boon. It was everything I've ever wanted since I realised my feelings for him all those years ago. But his brother, P'Dan... he knew that something was off between us. And when he found out what I was doing he talked me into calling off the wedding because it wouldn't be fair to keep lying to P'Red."
Boon nodded, even though it didn't need to be said that he had warned Anon of this long before Dan did. If Boon were a lesser man, he'd tell Anon "I told you so" and leave him to wallow in the pity - but he was not. He knew that Anon was suffering, had already realised that Boon had been right - just him acknowledging that their lack of contact had been his fault was enough for Boon to remain by his side.
"But..." Anon continued, finally looking back up at Boon, a bittersweet smile on his face. "P'Red didn't want to break up with me. My plan worked. He fell in love with me. And the most fucked up part is I wish he hadn't - because it was all a lie. And now we're not talking because he's angry and hurt because I tried to call it off and I don't know what to say to win him over... And it's been hard because..."
"You still have to plan the wedding, don't you?" Boon finished when Anon fell silent. The heir nodded, squeezing Boon's hand back before releasing it, sliding it back into his lap.
"Yeah..." Anon nodded. "We have to smile for the camera. Smile in front of our families. But as soon as we're alone, we're back to how we were before the accident... No, actually, this is worse." Anon's voice fell into a whisper. "We don't talk to each other at all, anymore. At least before, even if he insulted me... we at least spoke."
"Silence speaks volumes," Boon quoted, watching as Anon absent-mindedly reached for his wine glass to take a sip. He didn't look drunk, which was good, but the effects of the alcohol must be making him feel more down and tired than usual. There was a droop in his shoulders, as though he burdened a heavy weight, and his usually keen and sharp eyes were half-lidded and puffy. Boon wondered if he had been crying. Anon was great at keeping his feelings together in the public - the press had never seen him cry - but alone at home was a different story. "He's hurting, you're hurting. You need to talk to him, Non. And not just about the wedding - about everything. His accident, his real feelings for you. If you admit that you were wrong, that you made a mistake, you could be redeemed. It won't be easy, but at least you've softened the blow, right?"
Anon set the glass down, once again resting his head in his hands as he nodded along to Boon's words. He knew that the other was right, that the advice he was giving him was the best course of action - and Anon wanted to take it. But - and this was something he'd never admit - he was terrified of what Red's reaction would be. He never thought it could get any worse than swearing or insults - but the silence, the ignoring, the lack of texts and calls, it was killing Anon. And every day he didn't hear from his fiancée, he was instead expecting another call from the hospital, telling him that Red had been in another accident. Anon couldn't be the reason for it - especially since deep down, he suspected he was the reason for the first one too...
"You're right," Anon acknowledged with his head bowed. "I know what I have to do. But... I'm scared, P'Boon. Scared of making things worse..."
"You have to take that leap, Non," Boon encouraged him. "There's no other way around it. Otherwise, what you're going through now is going to be the rest of your life with him - and you don't want that."
"No, no, I don't," Anon shook his head. "This- this is really good advice, P'Boon. Thank you. Thank you so much." Anon told the other, gazing up into his eyes. "And I'm sorry I shut you out. I shouldn't have done that. You're my friend, and I was selfish." Another smile crossed Anon's face - one that didn't reach his eyes. "I still am. Sitting here, asking you to come and listen to my sob story - you didn't have to stay here with me, but you did. And I appreciate it."
"You know, a lot of your problems could have been solved easily if you chose me instead of Red," Boon smiled cheekily, drawing out a little chuckle from Anon, who also rolled his eyes. "But the heart wants what it wants, right? Plus, I'm totally over you now."
Anon managed a laugh, the heir shaking his head. It was the first time he had felt happy in weeks - everything going on, the whiplash between the difference in his personal and public lives, had taken such a toll on their heir. Even his grandfather was worried, noting how Anon had lost some weight, which Anon brushed off as a result of the wedding planning. He didn't want anyone in his or Red's family to know they were unhappy.
"I needed to talk to you, P'Boon. Really, thank you for coming. I was going crazy, without a friend. And things are only getting crazier with the wedding being so close." Anon explained.
"Have you set a date yet?"
"We have, though who knows if we're going to go through with it. But, just in case it does, I'd love for you to be there..." Anon reached into his pocket, bringing out a shiny cream envelope. It was sealed with a red wax stamp and had his and Red's government name - Daeng - etched on the front in cursive. He handed it over to Boon, who opened it immediately to find their wedding invitation inside. "It might be weird inviting an ex - but I don't know how I'd manage if my best friend wasn't with me. I hope you can come, P'Boon. I hope it's not too much to ask of you to be there."
Boon ignored the slight pang in his heart as he carefully slid the invitation back in the envelope - though, he did notice the feeling of pain wasn't as strong as it used to be. Maybe... maybe he was truly getting over Anon, for good this time. Maybe now they could just be friends, and nothing more. "Of course I'll attend," Boon promised. "I'll be there for you Anon. Now come on - we have two months of life to catch up on."
"Yes," Anon agreed, lifting up his drink. He was in a considerably better mood now, the sadness in his eyes still prevalent, but not overpowering his entire being as it had before. "I need to know about how a certain closet case ended up as the lead in a BL film. Do tell, P'Boon."
"I'll let the closet case comment slide because you're upset," Boon teased, kicking Anon's foot lightly under the table. "But... yeah. Let me tell you all about it..."