hell yeah I'm the motherfucking princess

Mav | Porn Princess likes include: Alice in Wonderland, puppies, sci-fi, dismantling the patriarchy, reading too much fic, plants, pretending I can draw dislikes: nazis, income inequality, spiders GOOD OMENS | KLAINE | STAR WARS | FARSCAPE | DOCTOR WHO | MCU

[awholebunchobananas]

From the Good Omens script book...

BROKE: Wall sex fics

WOKE: C E I L I N G S E X F I C S

[sndwave]

the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

[sndwave]

*stands majestically in a bucket*

[stemmmm]

ok but notice the trail of buckets behind him meaning he walked from the ocean through three other buckets of water before he got into the one hes standing in

[prokopetz]

It’s even funnier when you consider how he must have figured all this out in the first place.

Some folks are asking “well, if he can avoid the no-dry-land curse simply by standing in a bucket, doesn’t that ruin his whole motivation?”, but he’s not on dry land here.

The parley takes place on a sandbar - which, for the unfamiliar, is a temporary “island” of sand deposited by breaking waves, unconnected with the shore, that spends most of its time submerged, being exposed only at low tide.

What Jones is doing here is rules-lawyering his curse. Can you imagine the trial and error he must have gone through in order to determine that this would actually work?

“Okay, do islands count as dry land? How about parts of the shore below the high tide mark? Reefs? Shoals? What if I stand in a pool of water on a shoal? Does it have to be seawater, or will any water do? Does it have to be a natural tidepool, or can it be something artificial, like a bucket?”

What I am saying is that there must have been a process.

[stumblngrumbl]

Pretty sure that this implies that the reverse - a bucket of sand, floating on the water (big bucket with just a bit of sand), would qualify as dry land. That’s absurd, so I’m pretty sure that his lawyer pulled a fast one over the curse governor.

[prokopetz]

It may be absurd, but the text of the film bears it out. Davy Jones can sense the presence of his heart while it’s at sea, but not while it’s on land (indeed, that’s why he buried it on land in the first place: to break his connection with it) - yet placing the heart in a simple jar of dirt conceals it from Jones’ awareness just as surely as burial on land does, even if the jar is on a boat at the time. Suitably prepared vessels filled with dirt absolutely count as dry land for the purpose of Jones’ curse.

[silver-tongues-blog]

Then the reverse should also be true. If he buried it in a jar of water, no matter how far inland it is, he would be able to sense it. So by this logic, any container of seawater counts as not dry land, ergo, the bucket is a perfectly viable loophole.

[prokopetz]

Not necessarily. It’s traditionally a lot easier to accidentally get whammied by a curse than it is to weasel around it - I figure that’s why he’s using multiple layers of indirection here. He’s forbidden to set foot on dry land, but it’s technically not dry land (it’s a sandbar, a non-permanent landform exposed only at low tide) and he technically didn’t set foot on it (he’s standing in a bucket of water). It’s entirely possible that either one of those things alone wouldn’t make the grade.

[officialharshnoise]

okay but this all raises one further, very important question: if it’s specifically “dry land” he’s forbidden from, what about wetlands. can Davy Jones fight you in salt marshes? can he throw down in a peat bog?Swamp Battle?

[musicalhell]

This is the quality content I come to Tumblr for.

[karometeenk]

could he step on land if his shoes are wet?

[there-was-a-girl]

No matter how ridiculous PotC gets I will love it. Especially when it results in conversations like this

[glumshoe]

What if he crawls around on his hands and knees, with his feet raised slightly into the air? Can he walk on his hands? Can he ride around in a litter or a wheelchair?

[princedorkface]

can he be in a wheelbarrow?

[bemusedlybespectacled]

What if he flies over dry land? Like in a hot air balloon, or in the claws of a giant bird?

[pantheraj]

What if he’s carried by two swallows using a strand of creeper?

[strikelikeahawk]

European swallows or African swallows?

[thinster13]

this whole thread reads like a conversation between these two:

In fact im not entirely sure that it wasn’t their idea in the first place

[crowley-did-this]

Crowley founded the flat earth society

I want to refute this I really do but I feel like he mentioned it offhand in a pub and we ran with it and he’s like ?????

[savvymavvy]

First of all uh hi, is this thing still on? Is anyone even here?

Second, I did not (re) fall back into GOOD OMENS fandom so much as saunter vaguely downwards into it and wow it’s still lovely. I devoured every GOOD OMEN fic I could find about ten years ago and I am now having to re-find old favourites and the best part is all of the new fic ❤️

So I will be doing a rec list of my old favorites I’ve found so far if anyone wants it. In the meantime, there are two I’m trying to still locate if anyone can help a girl out:

The first: Crowley’s wings turned white. Demons are damned as they can’t feel or experience love but through Aziraphale Crowley was somehow able to and so his wings turned white. It’s like Az didn’t so much Fall because of both of them as Crowley ascended slightly?

I remember less of this one but it dealt with the After. There was another apocalypse, the big fight but I remember God sort of restarting everything, he spoke with both Aziraphale and Crowley, essentially was all for them being together, left both of them in the new place which was just the two of them for the moment and ducks aka St. James Pond

[knifefightscene]

y’all: here’s some alternatives to tumblr in case the site get merked on dec 17th

me:

[delusion-of-negation]

Results so far

[jujuoh]

ok so our titty choices are now: cubism, jpeg, manga, and Picasso’s Blue Period

[savvymavvy]

Tag yourself, I’m cubism.

[jheselbraum]

Like. I’m a firm believer that porn online shouldn’t be within kids reach (those “are you 18” checkboxes for life) but. Like. Ok first of all, just ban cp? It’s not hard? Cp is what got you into this mess just ban it. Second of all, you could increase the age of sign-up from 13 to 18. Third of all, you could do what deviantart does and just. Require birthdays at sign-up. If your blog is flagged as nsfw, you can’t interact with minors. You want to follow an nsfw blog? Prove you’re an adult. You’re an adult but don’t want to see nsfw content? Safe search (that actually works).

It’s not hard to make a functioning website, but staff doesn’t seem to want to do that.

[arkadykoshka]

From someone who’s survived MySpace, livejournal, deviantart, and fanfiction.nets’ content purges and bad policy updates, here’s some advice on how to get through tumblr’s recent bullshit:

- don’t knee jerk delete. I know it’s tempting to peace out immediately but hang on and do the other steps first. Out right ghosting and erasing everything is how fandoms die.

- archive everything on your blog you want to keep

- tell your followers how they can archive and keep your work too. A lot of fic and art were only saved from ff.net and lj because other people saved it first. If you’re cool with other people saving your work for them to personally keep, let them know this. You can absolutely discourage reposting but I really do highly recommend you allow people to personally save fic and art they like and are worried will disappear forever. Digital Dark Ages are a real thing.

- tell people where you’re jumping ship to. Give links. Keep that info up, even if you’ve left the site.

- go through who you follow and find out where else you can follow them. Save their work if they’ll allow it. It’s tedious as hell but if you want to keep up with people on here clicking on their page to check in is the best way to do it.

- support places like ao3. This is exactly why ao3 asks for donations a few times a year. They are a 100% anti-purging, judgement free, ad free non profit run by an elected board and protected by lawyers. Places like ao3 literally save fandom so please continue to support them and other similar archives. This is exactly why ao3 is so important.

[savvymavvy]

Reminder that ao3 is a bastion for fandom works.

Also uh don’t like up and leave without giving a heads up.

[bellamynochillblake]

we’re going to have to call smut ‘lemons’ again, aren’t we? 

[im-reddie]

LEMONS!? WHEN THE FUCK WAS THIS?!

[bellamynochillblake]

oh you sweet summer child 

[writing-prompt-s]

Four roommates are extraterrestrials who have taken human form in the hopes of learning about Earth’s culture. Unfortunately, each alien is from a different planet and believes the other three are normal humans.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I would read this

[ekjohnston]

OH MY GOD

[aaron2point0]

Starring Jack Black, The Rock, Jeff Goldblum and Taika Waititi 

[artemis69]

And Mads Mikkelsen, the human neighbour that is weird enough that all the aliens think he’s an alien too.

[byjove-cannibalcove]

they all are sure hes an alien and will go talk to him about how hard it is being an alien on earth, will even talk really frankly to him about it, but weirdly no matter what they say hes always like ‘oh yeah i can relate’

[sentimental-apathy]

It got about a thousand times better than the last time I reblogged this I think.

[catsbeaversandducks]

[klaine8468]

OMG I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT THE HAND TRYING TO UNBUTTON THE SHIRT WAS KURT’S BUT I’VE JUST REALIZED IT’S ACTUALLY BLAINE’S AND I CANT EVEN

LET’S FOCUS ON WHAT KURT’S HAND IS DOING THO CAN WE ALSO FOCUS ON THE TWO BUTTONS OF BLAINE’S SHIRT THAT ARE ALREADY UNBUTTONED???

[cinemove]

What We Do In The Shadows (2014) dir. Taika Waititi and Jemaine Clement

[theonion]

Woman Speaks For Record-Breaking 8 Hours Without Being Interrupted By Man

[taraljc]

living the dream

[innovatived]

Darren Criss & the time he finally asked out that cute Ravenclaw in the year below him.

Some more art for @twobirdsonesong for the @crisscolfergiftexchange, valentine’s day edition :D This time following a prompt near and dear to my heart.  

Click for full size!!!

[michael-scoon]

[trashybooksforladies]