A Regal Dark Creature

22 | He/him/his|SoCal Sorry if this place is a mess, I am tentatively looking into myself and trying to figure out just who and what I am. I believe I may be vampirekin and/or dragonkin but I want to explore a bit more and talk to others to figure out for sure.I worry I am just projecting since I have otherkin friends but at the same time I second guessed myself for years before I knew the terms for gender stuff as well. Kin Talk

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i feel like i may need to put a hold on my meditation and self searching. ever since starting to get into magic again and since trying to mediate on my thoughts i keep having bouts (from 2 min to ver an hour) of lost time and im kind fo freaking out about it :<

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I’ve been trying to meditate more to see if I can connect better but stuffs still a bit harsh so I can’t really drift and leave those problems behind like I need to. I want to be more sure of this instead of just questioning again like I did for so long with my gender and I don’t want to be afraid to explore this like I was with my gender either :< but i’m nervous asking people I know who are kin since I feel like they might just think i’m projecting on them or just ‘following the trend’

but its like i felt like ive been connected to and wanted so badly to be a vampire because it feels right for like 10+ years? and i am just really attached and connected to reptiles (snakes mostly) but some of my mannerisms are dragon-y which is why I’m questioning the dragonkin potentially and ahhhhh... if anyone would be willing to chat it up with me id appreciate it :,< 

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tfw you both love and hate bonfires

love because good food and a nice warmth and the smell of smoke just screams “HOME”

but hate because I feel like I should be able to touch and manipulate the fire? but i know i’d hurt myself if i did

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I’m poking through blogs as I take a break and like *slaps cheeks gently but furiously* everyone is so cute, so nice!!! I found an eflkin blog and gosh all of you are so amazing, so regal, so AUGH I have no words? And all the other dragons I see are fantastic and awe-inspiring and I’ve seen the cutest woodland creatures scattered about how are you all so amazing?

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Since re-starting my journey into magic, and especially since starting to delve into the world of otherkin and question my identity, more and more often will I find myself subconsciously breathing really deep, holding my breath for a second or 3, and feeling a burning, rolling warmth in my stomach. Fire perhaps? or just a very content energy burning inside? I never knew how to describe it before but this feeling has followed me most of my life.

Do any dragonkin or magically inclined otherkin feel this or something similar?

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am at war with myself because there are many aspects of dragon and vampire that can cross over (luxury and strength and magic and teeth/claws for example) but on the other hand i’m like

me sometimes: its a pleasant temperature out, the sun is slightly warmer than the air and is heating the world up nicely i want to lay on these rocks and soak in the sun and feel it on my skin

also me in the same situation sometimes: the sun is out and it is my enemy why isnt the moon out i hate the sun im going to burn and die time to sleep more

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Sorry if this place is a mess, I am tentatively looking into myself and trying to figure out just who and what I am. If anyone has experiences figuring out if they are -kin or -hearted or just rly like a thing/am projecting a bit.

Mostly in regards to Vampires, Dragons and Reptiles (snakes in particular) I would love to hear your experiences as I am very very lost and just coming to accept kin (bad past experiences with rly rude kin like heavy threats kind of bad experiences when I was a kid made me not want to even associate with anyone who identified this way but bless nice new friends)

Below are my lists of thoughts/mannerisms/experiences that have made me consider the label otherkin. Some might be repeated since I compiled a few posts I made on my old blog.

friends tag pictures of snakes with my name: snakes!!! yess!!!! me? me!!! … me?????

gets happy when people refer to me as a snake??? (unsure if kin/hearted feels or cause a nickname finally stuck…)

loves being told how powerful i am and people praising me because yes mortals should fear me i will end you anytime i wish

imagines slowly crushing ppl i dont like/squeezing them too tight with my arms

sometimes hates being a human beyond simple dysphoria and wish i could rip it all away and exist as Something Better

collects all the things that make me happy and tries to be a luxurious as possible

takes shower so hot im red and have steam rolling off me for many minutes after and it still wasnt hot enough? hot tub at 100-102F also still not hot enough sometimes?

who needs sun when you can be up all night? the sun sucks

alternatively sometimes though: its a decent temp day but the sun is high and it feels soooo good soaking up this warmth against the sand/stone and knowing it would be 1000% better if I had scales

either way when it's cold im bundled up and snarling and clinging to my friends who are living heaters

has for years and years refereed to my bed as a nest? and made it a lush and comfortable as possible with so many blankets and pillows and plush things

used to dream and wish so so so hard i would be stolen away by a vampire and honed and turned because… idk why honestly besides i love vampire so much and had to be one

strong connection towards magic and the desire to learn and master what i can, very empathetic to the point it hurts sometimes, too aware of auras/spirits when i dont have my guard up

rolling my shoulders to stretch out the kinks and knots and soreness and sometimes feeling like something is wrong/missing

I have always loved the ideas of dragons and wanted them to be in touch with them, magic in general honestly and ive been studying all kinds of magic for years thirsty for the knowledge of all sorts and wanting to practice (which i am actually starting to do).

Hoarding? Huge problem. If I love a thing i need all of them. vampire books, figures of a series i love, all of the different types of crafting supplies even if i dont think ill ever use them again i need to keep them, gems/crystals, shot glasses/pretty cups, earrings, etc. I have a lot of collections.

I also have a huge biting problem, my nails and cheeks/lips are a constant mess from me biting and gnawing on them and when i put in vampire fangs or sharp costume veneers i HAVE to bit everything (usually myself because biting others is very rude but damn does gnawing on stuff with these fake teeth feel so good and right sometimes?).

Whenever I put on pointed false nails too i feel like i have to scratch and mark things, though those usually dont stay on long because previously mentioned nail biting problem…

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Kintroduction Post?

I am a 22yo transdude (he/him/his pronouns only please) who is looking to talk to some non-humans/otherkin in order to help find myself. I have strong feelings I am either vampirekin or dragonkin, maybe both? But I want to talk to others and hear their experiences before I let myself claim that label.

If you are vampirekin, dragonkin or snakertherian I would love to speak with you and hear your stories and awakenings!

I am very very lost and just want to be able to quell the worry in my mind since  I have problems with projecting sometimes and I have a few otherkin friends who I worry I am just trying to ‘fir in with’ by placing thoughts that may not be fully there. On the other hand I also second guess myself about all things that I cannot get a solid for sure answer to so it could also be that and not projecting.

(transferring things over from my old sideblog scaledvamp so I have more freedom to follow, send asks, etc)