Cold Hearted Snake

Santana Lopez. Beauty Therapist. Mother of two. Cross me, I dare you

[scnlopez]

libbyfabray‌:

“I mean honestly, I’ll take either of those options. If he’s not going to ask then I’m certainly not going to worry. And if he does, Anna Grainger will be happy to oblige. I mean, you definitely look good - I’d ID you.”

“Anna Grainger might wanna watch out for the liquor store guy hitting on her. I’ve not seen many attractive guys work in a liquor store.” In fact Santana had never seen a hot guy liqour store owner, but that could be for largely different reasons. “I can only hope I get served in stores by more people like you, who have appreicated how hard I’m trying to still look flawless, I wish it was easy.”

[scnlopez]

kurtehummel‌:

“Exactly! I understand that I don’t really ‘get it’ considering I am so white my skin just burns, but why not just go outside to get that glow? Coating yourself in goop just seems impractical and like a waste of money. I could say the same about you. I’m Kurt Hummel.” 

“That self tanning moisturiser is probably the only thing I would recommed. Especially for you if you burn. Help keep you looking fresh. Especially if you want skin to match that sense of fashion you’ve got there.” She hummed, her lips curving into a sincere smile. “Definitely don’t waste your money on a fake tan. The pale thing kinda suits you, if I’m honest. But I’m Santana, Santana Lopez. Nice to meet you.”

[scnlopez]

marvelsgreatest‌:

Sam instinctively licked his lips. She had a point. “I guess I see your point, but sometimes a little white lie can help avoid an altercation and may put a smile on someone’s face.” Or, just say nothing if you have nothing nice to say, Sam thought to himself. Maybe he should try being more upfront, but he really hated confrontation. On that note, he took out his chapped stick and applied it to his lips.

“Little white lies could spirial. What if she then always got a bad fake tan because I told her it looked good? I’m mean but I’m not cruel.” Santana hummed, quirking her brow. She could see the wheels turning in his head as he thought to himself. It was adorable. However, she soon scrunched her face up in confusion, chapstick? While she appreicated looking over himself, was now the time? “Cherry chapstick by any chance?”

[scnlopez]

libbyfabray‌:

“Is it a sign that I’ve bought too many bottles of wine when the guy in the liquor store doesn’t even ask for my ID anymore? I mean, or maybe we’ve just got to a stage where he knows it’s fake, but he just doesn’t care.”

“It’s a sign that that guy in the liquor store must be desperate for business. Either that or he thinks your cute. Either way use that to your advantage. And be glad you still get asked for ID. You miss that when you hit my age. And I still think I should be getting asked.”

[scnlopez]

sphqblaine‌:

“I’m not a fan of fake tans either, like, at all, but maybe next time you could just… try to tone it down a little? I’m still confused about why she asked a stranger how they felt about her fake tan, though… You didn’t know this woman, right?”

“Tone it down a little? That’s not in my vocabulary if I’m being honest. I don’t know her, but I could have. She could have been a potential client, but after that comment about her fake tan, I think I might have lost a bit of business there. But you win some, you lose some, right?”

[scnlopez]

hunterchange‌:

“Oh um, that’s great miss,” he said, tilting his head as he looked at her.

“Well you did ask why I was so upset, you brought that story on yourself.”

[scnlopez]

kurtehummel‌:

“I entirely second that. Plus, the stains it leaves on clothes? I don’t know how anyone does it.” 

“Imagine looking like an oompa-lompa in a white shirt? Stained sheets and everything. No thank you. We should all just go on holiday like normal people and get our tans that way. You are one human being who knows what he is talking about, I like that.”

[scnlopez]

hepburnnotaudrey‌:

“That was… A lot to take in. Maybe next time keep the opinions to yourself? Granted, it was a warranted response but most people don’t appreciate the truth, even if it hurts.”

“Truth hurts, people just need to get used to that. Why cushion people’s lives? They’ll never learn that way.” She shrugged, she wouldn’t want to boost anyone’s confidence if she was letting them walk into the world unprepared. “People should really appreciate the truth more.”

[crayonstoperfume]

glee character meme [5/6] main characters ⟶ Santana Lopez

“The only straight I am is straight-up bitch.”

[scnlopez]

Ask me anything

It’s honesty time for Ms Lopez

[scnlopez]

kurtehummel‌:

“I find that people very rarely have fake tans that actually look good. Too much margin for error.”

“I’m so glad someone else understands. Fake tans should be largely reserved for people with enough money for someone to photoshop the horrible details out. The margin for error can only be eliminated that way.”

[scnlopez]

mamaqfabray‌:

Quinn stared at the strange woman for a moment, unsure of how to respond. “You probably should have just walked away before she had the chance to slap you. Just my opinion.” 

“Maybe. But then I wouldn’t have any interesting stories for people in the line at a coffee shop, would I?” She laughed, her lips quirking into a small smile. “And you would’t have met me without the story, I’d say win/win.”

[scnlopez]

sofie-lopez‌:

“I can’t say I’m surprised. I saw someone with a perm the other day-and it was not done well. In all honesty, can a perm even be done well nowadays? You’d think people in the city would have more taste.” 

“I think if you’re going to even attempt a perm you should be over the age of seventy.” Maybe it was a harsh statement, but it was true. Fashion trends had to be followed, and perms should not be allowed to make a comeback. “Can you imagine a patchy tan and a perm. I really need to start promoting the salon more. I might need you help with social media...”

[scnlopez]

marvelsgreatest‌:

Sam nodded alone but was still confused about her story. “Did you know her? Or was she a complete stranger? Because if you didn’t know her, then a fake compliment could have avoided the altercation.”

“I didn’t. She could have been a new cilent, but I couldn’t control my face.” She shrugged. “Fake compliments aren’t something I do. Why lie to someone like that? Would you want someone to lie to you about your chapped lips?”

[scnlopez]

sofie-lopez‌:

“Gross. Next time, she would be better off going to you for a fake tan. Maybe she wouldn’t look so horrible.” 

“My thoughts exactly, Mija. Like how could someone confidently let her leave the salon like that. I’m worried for the woman of New York, just saying.” She hummed, tossing her hair over her shoulder before shrugging. “It was really just a warning that fake tan? Not for everyone.”

[scnlopez]

mamaqfabray‌:

“Oh my god,” Quinn said, a bit taken aback. “Maybe you could have skipped the part where you gave her a nasty look? Just a thought, though.” 

“I can’t control any of this.” Santana started, gesturing vaguely to her face. Her expressions definitely spoke louder than her words and of course it landed her in some awkward situations. “It was terrible though, I should have gave her my card... or is that just too far?”

[scnlopez]

“And then I turned to here, gave her nasty ass a look up and down and she slapped me. Wasn’t my finest moment but hey, not my fault she asked my opinion on her fake tan, it was patchy...” ( @sphqstarters​ )