Back to listening, though he hand managed a step forward with the god. Although... He took a deep breath in, then back out. As much as he would have liked to just ramble on like Hermes was currently, loosening his grasp of self-control would be entirely equal to one step forward and two steps back. That would be inconvenient. No, reaching a tier of emotion like Hermes... As mild of a thought as it was, it scared the spirit. There was just so little security in it, and seeing the god--his foil, even--it was almost a sort of preview into what a careless choice could lead into. No, he was perfectly fine appearing as an apathetic rock. Things were less muddled this way.
He shot back at fiery eyes with his own calming set as he managed to hold himself back from a sudden ascent towards violence. While he never truly liked the idea of turning to violence, he was starting to think that it might be a better choice than this. Taking the anger that was more or less justly directed at him? He could take it. He was in possession of traits that often frustrated others, after all. It was fair. He could take it, and he would.
But the fact that he was accused of something that the god still had yet to even understand----his jaw tightened and his fingers curled into his palm and all he could hear was stay calm stay calm stay calm d amn it S TAY CALM----
His hand shot out before he could stop it, whipping across the blond's cheek with an immense crack of skin against skin, absinthe irises wide with the frustration and anger and hate he had stuffed down into the darkest recesses of his mind where they waited countless years to see the light of expression once more. Did it hurt to happen? Was it the right move to make? Did he even care about what he was doing? Yes and no. But he didn't have time to spare at the moment for such a trivial sequence of questions. Everything seemed red.
"Does it matter to me? Does it matter to me? Are you honestly going to ask me that at a time like this while you flip out like a child in the midst of a tantrum? Did it ever occur to you how I might feel about this entire situation? Did you even bother to stop and think about how the choices you make affect others? I highly doubt it, because if you did then you wouldn't be in this mess to begin with! You ridiculously sad excuse for a self-aware being--" Volume rising, he straightened, teeth grinding against each other as he looked Hermes dead in the eye without a shred of hesitation.
"You don't know me. You don't know a single thing about me, and yet you seem to have convinced yourself that you know me well enough to tell whether or not I care. What if I do care about what you're doing? Did you ever stop to think about that? Even once? It's difficult to care about someone when they accuse you of the converse, but perhaps that's the problem. You push and push but when the shove finally arrives you can only get out of the damn way in the end or turn the situation around to where someone else is thrown into the crossfire that is your lack of responsibility and self-esteem. You say you don't like to be tied down, but that's not true. You just can't handle facing the consequences of your choices!
"I do care about you, despite how brief our time was simply because I thought that under that 'cool kid' facade there might actually be a half-decent being in the end that would be worth knowing. But with the way you act, it's only making it harder to keep doing so. How can you possibly expect someone--anyone--to care about you when all you do is take it for granted?!" His breath came out in short huffs, voice giving out near the end from the simple fact that rarely did he ever speak so much so loudly; the strain almost had his voice entirely faded.
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