BADLANDS.

[victoria-pedretti]

The world’s in a funny place right now, I know that you participated in the Women’s March… tell me a little bit about that.

[scvannahevans]

xo-lucysa:

Catching onto the nauseous look on the blonde’s face, Lucy moved the garbage can over to Savannah as casually as she could. “No problem,” Lucy assured her with a tight nod.

Taking the garbage can closer to herself in case of it coming up with no warning, Vannah finally peeked up at the other with nothing but fear, guilt and sadness in her eyes. “I’m ---- sorry,” she finally whispered, sighing to herself. “Didn’t really --- mean to drink this much.”

[scvannahevans]

xo-lucysa:

Lucy frowned deeply at her ex-girlfriend. “Savannah,” she murmured as she attempted to get the woman to open her eyes. “Come on, Sav. I have water for you.”

Finally opening her eyes and allowing herself to focus on the Smythe-Anderson that was in front of her, Savannah nodded her head slowly, instantly regretting it with how the world slowed down all over again, making her stomach flip in way she was sure she was going to vomit. “Thank you,” she muttered quickly.

[scvannahevans]

[scvannahevans]

venessa-augustin:

“I was just asking if you were okay,” Venessa repeated calmly. She knew the signs of trauma well, being trained in how to help sexual abuse survivors, but she wasn’t going to force the blonde to talk to her.

“Uh --- yeah, I’m fine.” She muttered quietly as she sunk into her seat once again, her fingers tapping against the now cold cup that was supposed to be filled with hot coffee.

[dailycelebrities]

When I have bad days, I just eat lots of chocolate ice cream and dance to the ‘Lion King’ soundtrack. It’s really odd, but it’s true.

[anthonybridgertonn]

Who says we can’t do anything that we set our mind to? You may not be the best at it. You may not be the most successful. But you can try your best. That’s what having it all means to me — not letting anyone tell me no but myself.

[scvannahevans]

aaron-abrams:

Aaron looked on passively while Savannah slowly started losing it, not moving much at all when she started pushing at him. Maybe he would have caught her if he had realized that she was going to hit the floor—either way, he didn’t and his mouth screwed up a bit in displeasure while she sobbed. Instead of saying anything or trying to offer comfort, he backed up a bit to give the both of them space, her because she was sobbing and him because he wasn’t sure what to do with so much emotion coming off of one person. “Do I need to call Chris or Rio?” He asked after a minute. He wasn’t about to call his ex and he doubted Viola cared much anyway.

It wasn’t until she heard his voice that she finally allowed herself to take the deep breaths that her body was begging for, the kind of breaths that she had almost forgot she could take over the past few weeks. “-----He wouldn’t stop,” she muttered in response, although it was almost as though she was talking to herself, her eyes gazing at a spot on the floor after she wiped the tears, her face still stained with streaks. Her small body curled up, her arms wrapped around her legs and she began to slowly rock herself back and forth for a sense of comfort as she began to relive the situation in her mind, her body externally cringing at the thoughts and reality of the situation for the first time. “---I said stop and he didn’t,” she whimpered. “I --- I thought it was my fault. I thought ---- it made sense to blame me.”

[tragedysins]

How you feeling? I almost brought you a jar of pickles.

[scvannahevans]

aaron-abrams:

His brows furrowed and his expression settled into what was vaguely a scowl. “Because that’s what you are, Savannah. A child. I can treat you like the peddler that tried to make off with my money—shame he won’t be able to walk. I can treat you like Richie, the one that threatened to get the cops involved if I didn’t let him go with a blank slate.” He shrugged leisurely. “I’m not sure where he is, but I know where his wife works. I know where his kids go to school. I know where his sister lives.” Each sentence was punctuated with a few steps, advancing steadily on Savannah. “So if I tell you not to worry, you’re not going to worry.”

“I’m not a fucking child!” Rage echoed from her raised voice as her eyes began to tear up and her body began to feel weak. Losing control wasn’t something Savannah was able to take lightly -- at least not at a time like this. She had to make her father look after the twins for weeks, causing her to be alone in her damned apartment, counting down the hours until she had to find the courage to get out of the door and if she was being honest, she had to talk herself into going to Aarons for a full week, taking ten steps closer every day before bolting it back to her own basement apartment. “I’m not a fucking rat. I’m not an idiot that’s not going to pay you. I’m not going to ---- I’m fine!” It was then, in that very moment that it was clear her meltdown was about something else, tears streaming down her face as she pushed against the leaders chest with shaking hands. “I’m ---- not a fucking child! I’m not --- I’m a person! I’m a fucking person --- I don’t ---- I’m f---ine!” She stuttered between sobs, images flashing before her eyes as she managed to let her small body crash onto the floor, the much needed breakdown taking over.

[scvannahevans]

aaron-abrams:

Hands shoved in his pockets, Aaron’s bored but neutral look shifted into something a bit more irritated. “I’m letting you out,” he answered, calm and even. “You owe me. Trust me, that won’t just go away. When someone tells you you don’t have to pay them back right now, why argue?” She was angry and he could tell, but he kept his own temper under control.

“I don’t care,” she hissed between words as her small arms crossed in front of her chest. Egging on the male was only going to make situations worse, but part of Savannah didn’t even care if things got worse for her, that part of her didn’t even believe things could get worse from where she was now. “Why? Because I’m damn well tired of being treated like a child. Tragedies happen every fuckin’ day, but no, apparently when something happens to me, I’m coddled. I have Rio texting me up the fucking ass every five seconds to see if I’m okay, I got Chris monitoring my every damned move and Viola asking me if I’m even okay to go back to work when I’m five feet in the door. So that’s why I’m arguing and that’s why I want to be treated like every other damn member of this gang.”

[scvannahevans]

aaron-abrams:

If he was being honest, Aaron had expected this—he’d expected it sooner, but he still expected it. Under any other circumstances, he would have pointed out that it wasn’t as easy as quitting, that he wasn’t about to make it as easy as just quitting, but Savannah looked worse for wear and he could get into it later. “Don’t worry about paying me back yet,” he grunted with a dismissive flick of his hand, shooting a brief look at his phone was a second before getting up. “We’ll talk it over in the future. Right now, forget it.”

“Fuck that,” she said with a raise in her voice the moment she was told that things would be put into the future, instantly feeling as though he was babying her just like the rest of the people around her. Anger radiated off the smaller woman, despite her state of mind, she was dedicated to feeling as though she was in control, knowing that the moment she let the past incidents come clear in her mind that control would be the last thing she had. “Give the fucking numbers, Aaron. Stop treating me like a child and give me the numbers and a deadline.”

[scvannahevans]

          “I quit,” she muttered quietly, the words echoing around the pair as she stood in front of him, refusing to sit anywhere in his place. She had to have been at least a few hundreds in debt with the gang leader, but instead of being able to pay him, she was standing there with irritated and bloodshot eyes, with a mess of a bun for hair that hadn’t been washed for probably a week because of her inability to even think of seeing herself naked and her body covered with such baggy clothing that if it didn’t sag, she’d look as though she weighed a few hundred pounds. “I’ll ---- figure out how to pay you back, just --- give me the number and I’ll get it to you as soon as I can, I promise.” // @aaron-abrams

[bleightondaily]

I feel like there are so many people I admire for so many reasons that I can’t look at one person’s life and say, “I want that life.” I want to make my own history.

[scvannahevans]

If she was being honest --- she hadn’t heard a single word fall from the others mouth as they sat across from each other, her fingers twirling on her lap and her eyes constantly moving around them. It had been the first time she made it a few feet from her front door since the incident at work, her body tense and her anxiety spiked. “----Sorry, uh -- wanna repeat it? Guess my head is elsewhere.”

[scvannahevans]

ii.

she doesn’t know how to breathe at this point, her hands shaking and refusing to look away from her phone as she sits on her bed. her eyes are blood shot and irritated -- partially because of the tears she managed to sob over the past twelve hours, and the other half because of the lack of sleep she had been getting over the past week. her phone screen flashes with another voicemail from work, and soon her phone lighting up with a new phone call coming in. 

letting out a loud scream, savannah finally chucks her phone across the room, finding a sense of control and satisfaction from the shattered bits flying across the small room. her shaking hands move back to her face, covering it for a few moments before the word rape flashes into her mind once again, causing her hands to move into her red locks, yanking at it for some sense of reality, blinking her eyes consistently to get the word out of the darkness surrounding her mind.

she could only imagine how it would’ve played out if rio didn’t find her fast enough, or if the male had locked the door behind them. she didn’t want to imagine it because she couldn’t bring herself to think about anything other than the feeling in her stomach that wouldn’t go away because of how the male took it upon himself to get into her personal space despite her constant dis-pleasured ‘no’s.

rape. the word was so ugly in the girls mind. it was something she never thought would happen to her --- and in her mind, it still didn’t happen to her. even with rio saying it out loud, it wasn’t something that happened to her. no, no it was her fault --- it was her fault that she got him riled up and he would’ve stopped, it was just a drunk customer unable to hear her fast enough. he would’ve fucking stopped.

but the denial didn’t stop the young adult from smashing a plate on the ground and kicking a few chairs in the small dinning room she had, punching her small fist into the wall and hearing her bones crack under the pressure she put behind the hit. tears streaming down her face once again as she sunk to the floor, unable to even pick up her phone and fix it for a sense of help or a sense of comfort --- unable to believe that it wasn’t her fault this happened.

[scvannahevans]

TEXT || RIO

Rio: Then what would you call that?

Savannah: Someone that got too excited and me shrugging it off.