tired of optimizing

trying to make sense of a strange world

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The Day the Music Became Carbon-Neutral

Musicians rely heavily on touring to generate revenue. That spells trouble for the climate.

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Graeber thinks that a sense of uselessness gnaws at everything that makes them human. This observation leads him to define bullshit work as “a form of paid employment that is so completely pointless, unnecessary, or pernicious that even the employee cannot justify its existence even though, as part of the conditions of employment, the employee feels obliged to pretend that this is not the case.”

“THE BULLSHIT-JOB BOOM”, Nathan Heller, The New Yorker

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I recently bought my first pair of Spanx in preparation for a wedding. My oldest friend was getting married in Texas, and the bridesmaids’ dresses – for all 13 of us – were pale pink, floor-length and as tight as shrink-wrap from the strapless neckline to the knees. When I first tried the dress on, I could see the inside of my belly button in the mirror. Frowning, I went online and bought a $98 “Haute Contour® High-Waisted Thong”. It arrived a few days later, and I tried it on with the dress: I couldn’t breathe properly, I immediately started sweating and everything looked even worse. “What the fuck,” I said, staring at my reflection. I looked like a bad imitation of a woman whose most deeply held personal goal was to look hot in pictures. And of course, in that moment, in a $98 punishment thong and a dress designed for an Instagram model, that’s exactly what I was.

Jia Tolentino, “Athleisure, barre and kale: the tyranny of the ideal woman” from The Guardian

“I looked like a bad imitation of a woman whose most deeply held personal goal was to look hot in pictures” - THIS killed me because I also feel this burgeoning pressure to look hot in pictures to the point where it almost swallows me ergo I post no pictures at all

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As Matt Buchanan wrote at the Awl in 2015, the chopped salad is engineered to “free one’s hand and eyes from the task of consuming nutrients, so that precious attention can be directed toward a small screen, where it is more urgently needed, so it can consume data: work email or Amazon’s nearly infinite catalog or Facebook’s actually infinite News Feed, where, as one shops for diapers or engages with the native advertising sprinkled between the not-hoaxes and baby photos, one is being productive by generating revenue for a large internet company, which is obviously good for the economy, or at least it is certainly better than spending lunch reading a book from the library, because who is making money from that?”

Jia Tolentino, “Athleisure, barre and kale: the tyranny of the ideal woman” from The Guardian - aka why now I really continue to feel confused about sweetgreen

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Athleisure, barre and kale: the tyranny of the ideal woman

How we became suckers for the hard labor of self-optimization. By Jia Tolentino

this article blew my mind

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hi

i haven’t posted here since JUNE wow!!!! but i feel like i’m not creating anything these days - only consuming - it’s frankly quite exhausting. i believe in balance so i’ll start posting here again

one thing that makes me sad is that i used to go under a different tumblr name - and i still like it - but too many people know about it... so here we are

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i think i’m burning out

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Life is getting better

At least for now

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If you’re not feeling okay today, here’s a virtual garden to heal your heart:

🌿🌱🌼☘🌹🍀🥀🌾🌻🍃🌱☘🌼🍀🌺🌳🌹🌲🌾🍃🌲⚘🌸🍃🌸🌳🌱🌾🌸🌿🥀☘🌷☘🌱🌹🌾🌳🍃🍀🥀🌹🌿🌻🌿🌼🍀🌲

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Men talk about “I want a daughter 😭💕” when they have never treated a woman with a morsel of respect in their entire lives.

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The history of dating reveals how consumerism has hijacked courtship

Dating was tedious long before Tinder and OkCupid.

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For dinner today, I ate a hard boiled egg

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Today after my gig, a lady came up to me and told me that my playing moved her to tears and that was really motivating and grounding and a lovely reminder that I need to keep music in my life

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If i don't end up burned out this week who really am i