𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖎𝖆

'cause it's three am and i'm callin' everybody that I know. and here we go again, while I'm runnin' through the numbers in my phone. and yeah, i'll take fake moans and dial tones. let 'em spill right down the microphone. i need it digital 'cause, baby, when it's physical i end up alone, end up alone.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames​:

usually it’s sebastian being this way toward lennon, something he admires and wishes he could do more often himself. it mostly being because his personality sucked on a good day, and he had no idea why sebastian loved him at all, being the moody prick he can be even on a good day. one wrong word at the wrong time was fuel for disaster. except today he feels immediately needy, longing for the attention from a pair of his favourite hazel eyes and endless grabby hands. “you don’t even know what time it is, love,” he coo’s into sebastian’s ear, pushing an arm under his husband to bring him in close, the other wrapping above so he can hug the smaller boy to his body, “it’s never too early for attention for you, have you been replaced by an alien?” as soon as ice cold feet meet his skin, he immediately tenses at the sudden sensation, letting out a small gasp. what a fucker. if lennon wasn’t so in need of attention he might’ve just shoved sebastian off the bed, but he wasn’t going to do that, he had needs. “i am dying,” he says softly, taking matters into his own hands as he starts to spread little open mouthed kisses down his boys jaw, nipping here and there, “sure you wanna kill me? i think you’d miss me too much.” 

sebastian has no idea what time it is, that much is true, but he’ll be damned if he’s going to admit to lennon that he’s right. instead, he just rolls over and crams his body deeper into his space, breathing in his scent as his face burrows into his chest. “maybe i was having a sexy dream, and you woke me up just when it was getting good,” he deflects the conversation away from lennon’s accusation, letting out a soft sigh against his skin before facing the sunlight that’s leaking through the bedroom window, one eye opening at a time. unlike his slightly less forgiving counterpart, it doesn’t take much for him to accept the disruption, stretching his gangly limbs and pushing sleep-tangled tendrils out of his face as he assesses the vision he’s been awoken by this morning. it’s not very often that sebastian takes time out to count his blessings, always too wrapped up in his own angsty little world to see the sunshine just over the horizon, but in this moment he considers himself extremely fortunate. after all, how many people get to see lennon like this? “have you? if the roof was caving in over your head, you’d probably keep sleeping,” he justifies, speaking from experience. he’s found the ways to rouse lennon are few and far between, and even then there’s no guarantee that he won’t come to cranky as all hell. “ah, clearly. how can i help?” he offers, giving a coy shrug that conveys next to nothing of how much he truly would miss him. how much he aches for him now even with so little space between them, shuddering with each kiss.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames​:

the morning had never really been something lennon knew how to partake in. even if he did enjoy the sunrise, the cool air, and the overall feeling of a good morning, he never could wake himself up early enough to enjoy it. somehow today was different when he woke up earlier than usual, mind awake before his body was. long limbs stretch across the mattress as his mind focuses on the room around him, the warmth emanating from beside him enticing his body back into its previous relaxed state. waking up sebastian was a bad idea even on a good idea, except he needed attention and the sun just made him feel soft this early. “sebby,” he cooed gently into his boy’s ear, voice deep from sleep as he moved to sidle right up against the warmth of his body, “wakey wakey.” there were moments that lennon could be annoying, and he was sure seb could admit it, this not being a rare moment. lennon with all his dumb energy and sebastian lazier than anything in the world. with his nose he nuzzled against his neck, lips brushing the soft, warm skin. “c’moooonnnn, wake up.” 

@sebastianhq

sebastian greets the morning with a groan, trying his best to ignore lennon’s voice despite his precious sleep already having been disrupted. he’s not a morning person and never really has been. in fact, his behaviour borders on nocturnal, and lennon is well aware of this. sebastian is lucky that most days he gets to enjoy sleeping in until well past noon undisturbed, if not accompanied by an equally as lazy partner. today, however, said partner seems hellbent on being as annoying as humanly possible, which is supposed to be his job, thank you very much. “mmph,” he grunts, his willpower crumbling under soft touches. “s’too early,” he complains, even though the rest of the world has been up for hours now. sebastian feels like he just went to sleep, which he may very well have. legs entangle with his husbands, trapping an ice cold foot between his ankles and brushing his toes along his calf. “you better be dying, or something, ‘cause  if not i’ll kill you myself,” he threatens, but the malice isn’t there, a smile audible in his tone of voice. 

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

from this close up lennon could easily count each and every freckle peppered across sebastian’s face. it’s hard for him to not want to memorize all of these small details even in moments like this. this is the one time that he doesn’t mind that they’re not attached by every body part, their lips separate and not joined as one. this way he can watch every little reaction sebastian makes. for a moment he focuses on his boys mouth, the words spewing from his lips as lennon continues the onslaught of his fingers pushing in and out of sebastian, over and over, testing pace and roughness. on purpose he doesn’t angle his fingers where he knew he could take sebastian apart, wanting to save that for the end where he can physically feel and see him lose his mind. “do you? love everything about me?” he asks, his voice a few octaves lower than usual, unable to help the emotion that pours through his words, “maybe you should just say it, love.” at this point he isn’t entirely sure what he would do, or how he would react, if sebastian ever said the words to him. eyes fall down sebastian’s body where his fingers are within him, watching the way his boy’s hips move so in tune with his own movements. it’s so intoxicating to watch, somehow wishing he could spectate but also be apart of the reason why sebastian falls apart. so focused on the task at hand, he doesn’t realize sebastian has taken a hold of him until he feels the soft strokes, a gasp of air leaving his mouth, eyes fluttering shut at the dual sensations of sebastian’s mouth on his skin, and his hand on his cock. for a moment it’s hard to focus, his movements unsteady and shaky as he pulls his fingers from within his boyfriend. in slow strides, he moves sebastian’s hand from him, replaces it on his shoulder before he reaches for the lube again, more being doused on his hand before he slicks his own cock up. “think you can manage on your own?” he asked, gently taking a hold onto one of seb’s hips, the other hand positioning himself, “show me who you belong to, sweetheart.”

if there’s one thing sebastian can’t handle right now it’s his feelings for lennon. he’s already having trouble focusing on anything but the sensations that are overwhelming him, and it feels like every word lennon speaks is more deadly than the last, threatening to really just send him over the edge. he’s vulnerable like this, would probably say just about anything that lennon wanted to hear, but he can’t say that. intimacy with lennon is opposing everything he thought he knew about how sex isn’t meant to be soft and gentle, how it should be rough and physical, a moment in which two people chase their desires. if only the words coming from lennon’s mouth matched the force of his fingers it would be just that. “not here, not now,” he protests, whether or not it’s that he doesn’t feel prepared or that he truly couldn’t form the words with his mouth if he tried. that’s not to say he doesn’t love lennon, and he lets their foreheads touch as he smooths some hair back from his brow. he doesn’t know when lennon pulled his hand away from his cock but he gives his shoulder a firm squeeze as his fingers bury themselves deep inside of him, so close to but not quite where they both know they would make him lose his mind. if there’s a span of silence only filled by soft exhales and sharp inhales then he doesn’t notice, too involved in the stretch and eventual loss that occurs at the mercy of lennon, and he is at his mercy. any quick wit or impulse to challenge him he may have possessed is quickly disappearing and being replaced by a craving so dire it may as well be vital. “yeah,” he replies, a little too quickly, like maybe he’s been waiting for him to ask all morning, for him to give him permission to do so. he sits up, eagerly reaching back to line himself up properly, three fingers feeling much like nothing at all in comparison to his girth as he begins to sink down on him. “shit, shit, shit,” he hisses under his breath, verging on the border between pain and pleasure, but he only allows himself a moment to adjust, making small circles with his hips on top of him as he traces lennons lips with a finger. “yours, all yours. can’t believe i’m yours,” he repeats, the second he starts to rise and fall on top of him to slowly fuck himself is when he starts seeing stars, the drag of his cock inside of him making him dizzy. the hoarse moans that leave his lips increase with volume as he finds that perfect angle to stimulate his g-spot, knuckles going white on lennon’s shoulder as he clutches him through it.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

there are very few people lennon can say he’s lost his mind over. so few in fact he figures it begins and ends with the only other person in the room with him. the desire for the boy drips from his mouth in moans other noises he can’t quite put words too. if sebastian’s mouth is any one thing, it’s the god he never believed in, but maybe does now. so badly he wants it to never end, to keep the visual of the swollen lips as they, in slow motion, pull from his cock. it aches in a way he can’t put words to, no music could ever compare. maybe after all of this was over he’d come up with some mediocre ways to try and describe their connection, but even then it wouldn’t compare. as soon as they’re face to face, lennon feels lost in translation, like his brain hasn’t quite caught up with everything. hungry eyes follow each of sebastian’s movements like a predator stalking its prey. right then he’s a tiger, hiding in the grass as the antelope innocently drinks its water. “do you?” he asks, but his voice is so rough he hardly even recognizes it as it comes out of his mouth, “that all i am to you, then?” there’s a long, drawn out huff of air that leaves him as soon as sebastian is naked and properly sat in his lap, taking his breath away as soon as he was perfectly sat. eager hands grip sebastian’s hips as he rocks against him. lennon accepts everything sebastian gives him, even dipping forward as his tongue slides along his lower lip. “you’re so impatient,” he tells him, taking a small logical moment to pull slightly away, leaning over to his nightstand so can grab the lube, “you’re going to have to beg for it, baby.” as soon as his fingers are coated, he reaches down between sebastian’s legs, a curious finger pressing against his hole before he pushes in, fucking into him slowly for a few moments before he adds a second, and eventually a third to full stretch him out. “come on, baby, tell me how much you need me.” 

sebastian is somewhat oblivious to the way lennon’s looking at him, too preoccupied with looking at him in the same way. if he were an antelope, he’d probably already be dead, because he’s not really paying attention to anything except how he’s going to get his way. he’s got one goal in mind and he’s pretty sure that right now they’ve got that in common, but it feels like he can’t get there fast enough. there are times where he likes to tease and play coy and fool around, but this isn’t one of them. “of course not,” is his reply, lips inches from lennon’s but not quite closing the gap, instead just letting his eyes shift all over his face, trying to pick which of his features is his favorite. “i love everything about you,” he praises, being sincere. he can’t quite put his finger on what part of lennon drives him wild the most, but if he had to take a guess it would probably be a combination of things. it’s just him, as a whole, everything he is and and everything he does. he could get off like this, easily, at the right angle and given enough time to do so, but he doesn’t want to, and he’s relieved to finally have something inside of him when lennon’s fingers find their way there. he moans softly against lennon’s ear as he opens him up, keeping up with the gentle rocking of his hips to compliment the pace that he fucks him with his fingers. it’s good, a little too good, but even as full as he is he’s wanting more, probably won’t be satisfied until he’s literally split open like he doesn’t know what’s good for him. “please,” he whines, right on cue, unsure exactly what’s taken over lennon, what’s taken over him to the point where he’s begging for dick. it’s not the time or place to assess though, and instead he’s pushing back on lennon’s fingers, lifting his body just enough to sneak his hand underneath himself and wrap around lennon’s cock, giving it a few tugs. “fuck. always need you, jess. want you so bad, you’re so good to me,” he muffles into his skin, kissing his ear and the point of his jaw lovingly. all of this is his, whether or not lennon knows it, at least in this moment. although he hasn’t exactly voiced it to him, it sort of goes without saying that sebastian has always been lennon’s, and he has a strong suspicion that he always will be.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

to say he’s completely confident here would be an absolute lie. the one person who could probably prove that he’s still that insecure kid in all aspects of his life was the one shifting between his thighs. the only thing he can think properly of is his desire for sebastian, how evident it always is, and how deep it grows and branches throughout his entire body. where lennon’s desire for sebastian ends or begins he’s not entirely aware. it’s hard for him to pin the blame on any one thing, and it’s endlessly infuriating. whether he was hard before there’s kisses placed around his skin, he’s not sure, but he’s not putting it passed sebastian to get him there with barely a single touch. no one has ever gotten him that way, so ready on command without much incentive. so badly he wants to keep his eyes on sebastian, wants to watch every flick of his tongue, and every stroke of his hand, but his eyes shut at first contact, making it hard to think. a low drawn out moan leaves his mouth, head tilted back at the sensation. it’s almost too much to bare, his fight or flight instincts everywhere at once. “god i love when you speak french,” he groans through it, “it’s so hot.” so much that so that he aches in the chest, wants to capture the moment forever and keep it safe in a box somewhere under his bed. the way sebastian’s mouth stretches to fit him in is what almost does him apart, and he swears he’s never been more turned on in his entire life. long fingers twist in curly hair, a gentle tug being the clear indicator here that he is absolutely within sebastian’s mercy, a title never quite held by someone else before. reaching out, he can only deal with it for so long until he’s basically begging to be able to touch sebastian, wanting to feel him everywhere at once, to claim his body as his own. without gentle force, he grips the back of sebastian’s hair, pulling him off from his cock. “baby, i want all of you,” he says softly despite the rasp in his throat, “not just your mouth.”

sebastian has no reason to ever leave the place he is currently, more than happy to just stay here for as long as time allows. of all of the intimate moments they’ve shared together, this may be his favorite kind, fingers in his hair while he breaks him down slowly between his lips. it doesn’t take long for him to pass the back of his throat, taking him deep enough to where he no longer needs his hand to do the work, instead wrapping them both around lennon’s hips, fingernails forming indents in his untouched skin. he’s worked up to a rhythm that seems to be working for them both, judging by the sounds he’s begun to make, which are serving to turn him on more than anything else. he responds with a muffled groan around his cock, nose brushing his stomach as he sinks down on him fully with a deep exhale through his nose. he’s starting to think he has an addiction to lennon’s voice, no matter the things that it’s saying, using him to fuck his throat with the full intention of hearing more, prepared to continue until he finally climaxes. he isn’t anticipating the interruption when lennon yanks back on his hair, breaking his concentration and emptying his mouth in one swift motion. he brings a hand up to wipe the spit from his mouth, simultaneously severing the chain that still connects him to his dick, which he’s still eyeing with desire like he hasn’t just had it half way down his throat for several minutes. despite being freezing moments before, he’s suddenly over-heated, happily taking the opportunity to sit up and pull his shirt over his head, following it up with his boxers, tossing both onto the floor and crawling back up to face level. he sits on top of him, leaning forward to pin both of their lengths between their bodies and moving his hips in such a way that it provides them with friction, very deliberately making sure to rub against lennon so that he’s right against his crack. “i love your dick,” he praises, cradling his head in both of his hands as he kisses his neck. “it’s my favorite dick.” his fingers caress lennon’s cheekbones as he takes his lower lip between his teeth and tugs harshly, smoothing over the marks he leaves with his tongue like an unspoken apology. “fuck me, please,” he requests, driving himself crazy with how close he is to just sitting down on lennon’s dick without a second thought to opening himself up first.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

in the past, if lennon was good at absolutely anything, it was his commitment issues. when your interest always seemed to wander around the room, never usually set on one person, you couldn’t help yourself. when someone was boring to him it showed pretty early on and well – he can admit with sebastian it’s never been that way. whenever he’s in a room, he’s the only thing he can watch, want to be near. even as kids he would make the weirdest excuses to just sit behind him, to stare at the back of his head obsessively, ask him weird questions just to hear him talk. just by looking at him a certain way lennon would be at sebastian’s mercy, and right now it’s not different. “hm, maybe i do,” he admits, the playful smirk on his lips, “maybe i’d prefer you use your mouth for something else instead.” as he’s being pushed to his back, a grin is on his face. of course he had to let sebastian do that, the force being nothing more than a little nudge, but it still has him feeling generous. if lennon falls in love with that moment, it’s with the way sebastian’s thighs easily frame his lap; the way their mouths so easily find the others, and how natural it feels for their lips to move the way they do together. lennon would even go as far as to call it his heaven, absolute perfection. there are unwritten songs about the way sebastian’s fingers fit perfectly against the back of his neck, or the way their tongues move against the others so perfectly. it takes sebastian no time at all, and with each dizzying kiss he places on lennon’s naval, he gets more anxious for what warmer entails. “you’re so annoying, you know that right?” call him impatient or whatever, but lennon can’t stand to see sebastian there, right there, and not doing anything about it. with a slight shift of his body, he reaches down to tug the (now uncomfortable) fabric of his boxers as much as he could, down to his thighs. gently long fingers finger their way into curly tresses, rubbing sebastian’s scalp slightly before he tugs his head up. “do i need to tell you what to do, or can you figure that part out on your own?” 

use your mouth. sebastian can’t help but dwell on the word use, how appealing the idea of being used by lennon is. if he weren’t so fond of teasing him he would just let him do as he pleased with him, but he’s much too greedy for that. he wants lennon, all of lennon, the good and the bad and everything in between, and right now he doesn’t want to think about anything but how he’s going to get what he wants. he barely even registers that lennon is speaking, or rather complaining, groaning hungrily in response as his mouth follows the trail of newly exposed skin that he’s presented when lennon frees himself from his boxers. there’s so much to explore, so much to touch, so much that he’s been deprived of for years and he feels the need to make his mark on it now, to claim and to worship. he digs his teeth into his hip, biting down on flesh while fingers crawl between his thighs, curling around his length so that he can feel him at his full potential. he’s so dead set on memorizing every inch of him that he forgets that lennon is waiting for relief, that is until he pulls him away from his quest for rediscovery with a firm tug of his curls and a very clear demand. sebastian stares at him, awed, trying to decipher both where the hell it came from and how to respond to it. in any other situation he’d opt for defiance, but in this particular case he finds it pretty hot that lennon’s alter ego happens to not take any of sebastian’s shit. part of him wants to submit completely, tell him that yes, he wants to be told what to do, or rather shown, but he manages to keep it together for now, sinking into the gap within lennon’s legs and nosing at his pelvis. a happy medium is what he goes for, something between fuck off and fuck me. “think i can figure it out,” is the result, breath hot against his thighs as he disappears between them, running his tongue along the underside of his dick and getting him slick with spit to jerk him off better. a soft french curse escapes him as he takes into account how truly over-sized he looks in his hand, anticipating how that size will translate to his mouth. if lennon is impatient, then there are no words to describe what sebastian is, tongue collecting the moisture that’s beading in the slit of his head before closing his lips around him, eagerly taking his girth between his cheeks. he can’t remember the last time he’s choked on anyone but if there were ever a circumstance where it would be likely, it’s this one, and so with that in mind he tries to hold back, swallowing him inch by inch instead of all at once.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

if lennon was anything in the morning, it was probably all the types of affectionate one person could be. unfortunately most of his mornings are spent by himself, wishing someone was there to keep him company. the thing was, he was never quite looking for just anyone. lennon realized what his mornings were missing when sebastian filled them up to the brim. the small touches bury themselves somewhere in his heart, a space reserved for everything sebastian gave him. as ticklish as he is, the small sensations spread a warmth over his body, the kind you can’t mimic with just anyone. unable to help himself, he lifted his head as he rolled his eyes at sebastian’s words. “you’re something, alright,” he tells the man with a smirk, not really sure how he ever really deals with sebastian, at all. usually all of the personality traits that turn him off are similar, but with sebastian it’s everything he wants. at the compliment he just rolled his eyes, again, something he’s sure it’s an effect of being around sebastian too much. “you talk too much,” he tells him, leaning right into his chest so he can bite his pec, “instead of just doing something, you talk, and you talk, and talk, and talk…” trailing off as his fingers trail along the seam of his boxer-briefs, ever so gently nudging inward. “you know if you wanna see something, maybe you should take the time and find out for yourself, sweetheart.”

sebastian tries, to the best of his ability, to act like he’s offended, but lennon’s making it awfully hard to hold a grudge. the flirtatious tone doesn’t go over his head, and sebastian decides that two can play at that particular game. he’s enjoying their lazy morning, but in all honesty he has trouble resisting advances from the average person, nevermind lennon fucking james, who’s held his heart hostage by means of lock and key for many days and nights. he gives him a forceful shove in order to move him enough to reverse their positions, rolling lennon onto his back so that he may hover over him. “you love my voice,” he insists, although there are times he questions why. sebastian annoys himself, he can barely stand to be alone with his thoughts for more than an evening before he starts to drive himself swiftly towards insanity. he lets their lips meet for another blissful moment, his hand gripping the back of lennon’s neck and savoring the taste of him first thing in the morning, just as he is. he’s not a patient man, though, and so he’s quickly moving onto to bigger and better things, mouth trailing down his stomach in pursuit of more. “you have to point me in the right direction. just tell me if i’m getting warmer,” he requests, all while mouthing at his navel like his body is his favorite flavor, licking and sucking at his soft skin. he makes it sound like he’s waiting for direction, but he’s not really, on some kind of mission of which he’s decided is of the upmost importance.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

even if only a few weeks had gone by and it felt like sebastian had been there for an eternity. the space and years between them didn’t exist, no one else existed for him at all. sebastian had him wrapped around his pinky finger, a small tug would have him crawling for more. “hard to pick a favourite part of your body for me,” he tells him honestly, unable to really hold back, “so that’s where my lie was, i guess you caught me.” out of everyone he had been with over the years they never quite stuck themselves to his heart where he felt it would last longer than a small amount of time. as soon as he got into something he was counting down the days that it would crash and burn. with sebastian it wasn’t like that at all, more like counting down the days until it was deemed socially acceptable to marry the fuck out of him, and keep him forever. a wide smirk stretches across his mouth as sebastian reached for the window, using this excuse to bury his face against his boys chest, breathing in his skin and the scent lingering there. “maybe i just like it cold, sebastian, ever thought of that?” he asked, easily letting his fingers easily curl into his boys. it was so easy with sebastian but also so absolutely exciting. despite this being his first person ever, everything felt so new and fresh and he wanted to experience it all firsthand. “well you got hot after all of these years, it sort of threw me off balance. forgive me for knowing what i want but having someone thwart all my efforts here,” he told him, mouth against his skin, “you call that confident? you haven’t even seen the best parts of my confidence yet.”

“mm?” sebastian glances down at him from where he’s nestled into sebastian’s chest, probably hearing how fast his heart is hammering into his rib cage, giving him away. “i can think of a few of yours that make the list,” he ponders aloud, letting his mind wander as curious fingers trace over his ribs and waist. he’s never felt so calm without the aid of drugs or medication before, and it’s so unfamiliar to him that it’s almost like an out of body experience, watching himself lie there without really associating the feelings with himself. he’s always itching to move, and do something, in a constant pursuit of ways to numb himself, but in this moment he’s content to just soak up the attention. his hand idly rubs over lennon’s hip as he closes his eyes again, trying to allow himself to just live in the moment. he’s never been good at that, always getting caught up in the past or fearing the future instead of being mindful of the present as he steadily loses time. “i don’t. i like being surrounded by blankets. pillows. ridiculously hot men,” he adds, for good measure, giving the one to which he’s referring to a soft squeeze of the fingers to let him know. he cracks an eye open, unable to keep himself in the dark for long, sighing quietly as his lips meet his chest. “i like to think i always had somewhat of a gangly charm,” he defends, lightly. not much has changed in that department, admittedly. “so did you. always so cute.” the thought of an adolescent lennon is a bit too much for him in the moment, a tug of emotion somewhere deep in his chest provoking him to push the thought away before that emotion takes hold of him. it’s too early in the morning for that. “what parts are those? think i’d like to see them,” he predicts, both eyes now open and fixed on his boy.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

if it were up to lennon he would just lay there and kiss every single inch of sebastian for as long as he lived. every new piece of skin he cherished more and more, loving the pale soft skin more than he loved anything probably. “as if i was waiting for your permission,” he jokes, lips hovering somewhere along sebastian’s collarbone, his hands raising so he can press his fingertips to the pulse point of his slender wrist. if he had been tired before it was a distant memory, especially around the time he got to sebastian’s hips, which like, hey, he could stay in this spot in particular for the rest of his life. “hm… i dunno, i wouldn’t say the best location, love,” he near whispered against his boys abdomen, only deciding to bring his kisses back up to his chest in hopes to kiss every little inch of his skin. “oh, have you now?” he asked, a grin on his face as soon as his chin was lifted up, leaning in so he could brush their noses together, “something tells me you need to learn a little patience, sweetheart.” as if he could resist himself any longer though, he leaned right in, sealing the distance between them with a small kiss. “you’re so fucking beautiful, do you know that?” slipped out between their lips, his hand coming up so he could brush his knuckles along sebastian’s cheekbones, “it’s kind of hard to look at you sometimes. i don’t really know how i got so lucky.”

sebastian feels closer than they really are, closer than anyone’s ever been, like lennon has physically crawled inside of him and made a home beside his heart. he’s a little bit uneasy because he can’t help feeling that lennon’s seeing parts of him that he didn’t necessarily want lennon to see, looking through his breakable glass exterior and searching for his even more fragile innermost parts. whether or not he intends to invade his barriers, he does so with ease, and he finds himself shattering voluntarily underneath him, begging to be put back together again by his gentle fingers and gentler words. “and you’re so... full of shit,” he teases weakly, giving him a soft shove to hide the way he shudders slightly as lennon touches him like that, like he’s worth something, worth his time and his affection and hospitality. quite honestly, he’s not sure he believes it, but it’s easy to feel that way with lennon stroking his face and showering him in compliments. “i’m pretty sure i’m the lucky one,” he insists, all while pushing himself onto his elbows to reach for the open window, using it as the source to blame for the goosebumps he’s acquired. “do you always keep it so cold in here or is that just a tactic to get closer?” he accuses, wrenching the pane down and flopping back against the mattress, immediately intertwining their fingers on the pillow behind him. “you’ve gotten awfully confident over the years, you know. it’s kind of throwing me off.” 

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

it’s the small question of ever that had lennon’s heart nearly exploding. it’s silly to him that the smallest of gestures from sebastian have his chest filling up to the brim with all of these emotions he doesn’t quite recognize. it feels like that first inhale of air first thing in the morning, the one that fills your lungs and rejuvenates you entirely. “mhm, ever,” he agrees, his voice rough on the exit from his mouth, and he wonders if it’s always like that so early, and probably the answer is yes. as if he talks to himself enough to ever know that he sounds like that. a small tired, short laugh falls from his lips as soon as sebastian suggests the tattoo tour, but he’s much too distracted by the gentle touches against his neck and eyelashes that sebastian has gifted him. suddenly he feels pretty awake, and he wants to discover all of the parts of his boy that he hasn’t quite touched yet. as soon as sebastian mentions the tattoo on his ass, it has made up lennon’s mind. “gonna tour your tattoos with my mouth though,” he says before he even thinks it, his body moving before he can even decide he wants it to, crawling over sebastian’s body and face tucking into his neck to plant small kisses along the smooth skin. “i’ll save the one on your ass for last,” he whispered slowly, not quite meaning for it to come out as seductive as it is, lowering himself so he could search pale skin for dark ink and as soon as it does, he presses a small kiss to the area, “best for last, right?” 

sebastian was already pretty awake, but he’s ten times more so with lennon’s lips reciprocating the gentle touches he’d started to leave across his skin. for a moment he’s taken aback, not quite expecting such a bold reply to his teasing. in another life lennon would have shied away, turned a charming shade of pink or refused to make eye contact. the fact that he does none of the above is very unlike the version of lennon that he once knew, but it’s not an unwelcome change. it just makes sebastian’s taunting a little less fruitful. “in that case, tour away,” he mumbles, trying his very best to drown out the white noise in his brain that seems to buzz whenever lennon gets close. it’s like radio static and it makes his head throb in the same way, so dizzy that his grip on lennon’s sleep-tousled hair feels more like necessity than anything else. “best location, i’m guessing. ‘cause the tattoo isn’t anything extraordinary. not like yours,” he compliment, admiring lennon in the light of the open window. most of sebastian’s tattoos were done in haste without much premonition, and they are less like the art that are lennon’s tattoos and more like nonsensical doodles. “could you make a detour? been dying to kiss you all morning,” he requests, cheek coming to meet his shoulder as he squirms away from the ticklish sensation and hooks a finger under his chin to capture his attention where he wants it.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

usually at this point of any date, lennon would be long gone. no one had ever really kept his interest enough for him to ever consider staying. a lot of nights were spent alone, denying to get attached to a single person. leave it to sebastian to change that pattern, who decided he just wasn’t going to let lennon have a single moment of peace and quiet. as if he would argue against it though. as he feels sebastian start to shift away from him, some sort of noise left his throat, a grumble of sort. not that lennon claims to understand the noises that come out of his own mouth when he’s barely conscious for it. as if he couldn’t help himself, lennon is tugging sebastian right back against him, his arms like a vice around his waist as he presses his face into his chest. it’s not the most comfortable position, but it’s all in a ploy for sebastian to stay in bed with him for the rest of eternity, and not leave him alone to rot and die alone and cold. “whatareyoudoing,” he mumbles out in a slurred string of words, face pressed into the boys soft skin with no plans to move whatsoever, “you’re not allowed to leave.” 

sebastian would deny it if anyone were to accuse his heart of melting right there on the spot from five stupid words, but it’s exactly what happens. although he’d been fighting to escape his grip moments ago, he immediately settles when lennon demands that he stay. it doesn’t take much for his priorities to shift from nicotine to staying forever in this very awkward position he’s maneuvered himself into, and so he submits himself to being his human pillow. “ever?” he clarifies, a little too hopefully. being a prisoner to lennon sounds blissful, and he willingly accepts this fate. “wake up, then. entertain me,” he whines, as if it’s some huge burden to him, being cuddled by the world’s most beautiful person. he walks his fingers up lennon’s arm, curiously admiring his inked skin for a few silent moments that are over too soon. he’s awake, and he’s restless, so now lennon has to be, too. “i want a tattoo tour,” he announces, fingertips brushing lennon’s neck oh so delicately, afraid to ruin the moment while simultaneously incapable of keeping his mind from shutting off for a second. and where his mind goes, his mouth tends to follow suit. currently, it keeps drifting back to the cigarettes in his coat pocket and taking the awful taste of morning out of his mouth, replacing it with something more sickly than sweet. “please. show me yours and i’ll show you mine. full disclosure, though. there is one on my ass,” he divulges playfully, fingers moving to skip across lennon’s eyelashes like the piano keys, playing some kind of soundless melody with his fragile features.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

to say lennon has ever slept well in his entire life would be an understatement. usually his body and mind have other ideas of what he should get when it relates to the amount of hours he gets to sleep a night. on tour it feels like he doesn’t get enough, and back home it feels like he gets too much. forever is the pain of creaky limbs at twenty-five, and headaches from the strain of thinking too much, and an absence of caffeine. lennon’s addiction grew when he was too young, probably in high school, when tea was a substitute for water, which eventually grew into the need to wake up more. which then coffee was introduced, and eventually somewhere down the road, the espresso drinks he loved and craved for so much. as soon as he was even an inch awake, the longing for caffeine was longingly there, and without he couldn’t breathe let alone exist. to say he’s pleasantly surprised when he wakes up completely well rested would be another understatement. the warmth that emanates from sebastian’s body is so inviting that even the idea of moving is blasphemy. as if it was completely natural, as if they’d done this before, he nuzzles his face right into his boy’s neck, limbs wrapped completely around the smaller of the two, and burying himself there with no plans of moving at any point of that day. @sebastianhq

it’s been a while since sebastian woke up next to somebody. the types of people he tends to associate himself with are the kind to leave before the sun comes up, but that probably speaks more for his self worth than it does for their character. this time when he awakes, it’s to the stirring of somebody next to him, arms wrapped around him and soft curls tickling the side of his face. sebastian blinks around a yawn, fingers coming up to grab a handful of said curls and letting them sift between his fingers before snuggling closer. it’s lennon’s apartment, so obviously it’s not like he can just leave, but it still means a lot to him that he’s here, pulling him in instead of nudging him to wake up so that he can get on with his day. sebastian peppers kisses along lennon’s temple to express his appreciation, no real desire to leave their little happy place under the sheets whatsoever. this also feels very familiar, like a dream he had a long time ago that he can’t shake. it still feels like a dream now, being surrounded by lennon too good to be true. despite his ability to sleep through pretty much anything, when he’s up, he’s up, and so is his body, which is presently craving a cigarette. and so he makes his very best attempt to squirm out of lennon’s chokehold without disturbing his state of peaceful rest, which proves more difficult than he had initially thought.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

when it comes to sebastian it’s like he’s exactly the opposite of who he becomes with everyone else. sure, lennon had fallen in love two, three more times maybe. except that it was always different, him always knowing it was going to end somehow, and probably in flames. once his father ever put a finger on him it ruined every soft part of him that ever existed and for such a long time he lost all idea of who he actually was. parties followed, girls - lots of girls - followed, but he could never quite seem to make a good decision in his life. all of his instincts were wrong from the start until the very end. sure he could go on about all the choices he should’ve made, could’ve made to make everything perfect, and better. for them, not for him. making himself happy had become a path that had become blurry over the years, the pathways dark and meek, and not quite clear. so he made all the wrong choices in search of that light and never quite getting there. making the worst decisions when it came to sebastian were never on his mind, not even close to it. somehow sebastian made that all go away, and even just being here made it all better. and sure, he knew that could bite him in the ass later, probably make him need this to protect him from the demons lurking under his skin, but he can’t think of that right now. not where their body heat mingles in the balance, and their mouths fit just right, so perfect. as they always did. there’s a stupid little grin on his face even as he’s trying to just kiss his boy, and forget all of his worries again. except with sebastian he never runs out of things to say, things to express. “i can tell,” he says softly between their lips, the implication clears as he slips his hand between their bodies, “always pack a hard on first date?” it’s that exact moment he gives sebastian a gentle, but firm squeeze over top the pants he’s wearing, rubbing through the fabric. as if he could stay far away for any moment longer, his lips are easily finding sebastian’s lips, accentuating the gentle movement of his tongue with the simultaneous movement of his hand. 

sebastian hadn’t been particularity aware of the ways his body was giving his desires away, far too engrossed in pushing boundaries to see how much closer they can get, how much space between them can be eliminated until he’s a part of him. he wants him to exist not just as a permanent resident of his heart but as a scent and a taste and a sensation that’s tangible. now that he’s within arms reach and not just a figment of memories or a reoccurring dream he can’t imagine letting him go. there’s a small, awkward scoff that he elicits when he’s put on the spot, even as he’s given the kind of explicit attention that he only could have conjured up in the wildest parts of his imagination no more than days prior. “not always,” he confirms, which ought to tell lennon that he’s special if he didn’t know it already. “is this a date?” he hadn’t actually thought of it as such until this very moment when he’s left questioning it, but then again sebastian has a bad habit of doubting any interest in him. especially lennon, who can do so much better. so much more established, or more stable in their emotions, so much less fucked up and lost than he feels sometimes. nevertheless, the prospect that there’s the chance of dates in their future excites him, and it only fuels the flame that’s burning inside of him to almost uncontrollable strengths. he wants more of this, whatever that may be, chasing that stir in the pit of his stomach. he clasps each of lennon’s cheeks in his hands, head tilting to allow him better access to his mouth as he kisses him harder, deeper than before. if he was hard already, he’s growing by the second until his jeans feel uncomfortably tight, and even though every bone in his body is screaming at him to go, he chooses that moment to stop and slow it down, pulling back from his mouth after a few last, small kisses. he very carefully removes lennon’s hand from where he wants it most, instead clasping both of his in sebastian’s own and bringing each individual knuckle to his lips so he can further adore each and every part of his body. “could get addicted to this. to you,” he struggles to articulate, his hesitations centering on the knowledge that lennon always has and always will have the ability to destroy him. even without intention. sebastian could find himself consumed by lennon in a heartbeat and he’s already teetering on that edge, but leave it to him to want to play with fire. “you’re very dangerous.” 

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

there’s always been something that had drawn lennon toward sebastian. what that was he’s not even sure at all. considering he’s always been such a needy brat, but even those small things were so enigmatic, and so important to lennon.  anyone else who even came close just annoyed him, even if they were exactly like him. the thing was no one could be sebastian for him, only sebastian, and no matter how much he looked for something similar, it was always different, and he hated it. right at that moment he just wants to memorize all of the parts of sebastian that he missed, the parts he never got to experience. like the sharpness of his jaw, or the jut of his cheekbone. everything is so new, and so important, and wants so badly for it to all be his again. “well, i have to give love to the other parts of your face, too,” he mutters softly, and knows sebastian will break at any moment, because unlike lennon who holds everything in, sebastian never could. it all works against lennon a second later, when sebastian’s lips meet the sensitive skin of his neck. in any other situation it would tickle and he’d push away pretty quickly, the goosebumps rise over his skin easily at the assault, his body shaking ever slightly because the reactions to sebastian’s lips have always been pretty intense anyway. “you always talk too much,” is what he mutters as soon as sebastian is positioned on his thigh, which he’s pretty sure may or may not work against the other male soon, "and you don’t even know what patience is, don’t use words you don’t understand.” as if sebastian even needed permission, though, is the thing. as soon as their lips meet there’s nothing blurred between them anymore, because he is sebastian’s, and has never been anyone else’s. gently he pushes his fingers through the mop of his boys hair, fingers combing through as their lips meet over and over and over, as if he could stop himself. tilting his head ever so slightly, he pulled his mouth away only so he could run his tongue along his lips, hands lowering to the other man’s hips. swiftly he switched their positions, pressing sebastian’s back into the sofa pressing himself between his thighs. “this suit your desires, love?” he smirked, leaning back down to seal the distance between their lips again, biting down and tugging at sebastian’s lower lip. 

sebastian swears lennon is quivering, but then again it could just be him. he feels like a firecracker about to explode, and that scares him a little, because lennon’s only just kissed him. who knows what he could do to sebastian with that kind of ability, when his heart is in his hands? not that sebastian doesn’t trust him with it, doesn’t trust him with his whole entire life. he’s always known that lennon had nothing but good intentions, especially when it came to him, who he’d treated with nothing but devotion and care. maybe this would have all been easier on him if he hadn’t, if lennon had been a piece of shit, not unlike many of those who followed him. then it wouldn’t be so fucking hard to let him go, and he wouldn’t cling to the memories like they were as much a necessity as the air he breathed. he’d never wish that, though. under no circumstances would sebastian ever want to change a single thing about their past or who lennon was. he can’t help but smile at how well lennon knows him, how easily he calls him out on his bad habits, one of which he can’t help but be grateful for, given if it weren’t for his inability to shut up they might not be in the situation they’re in right now-- sebastian on top of lennon, lennon’s hands in his hair, mouths playing a game of tag, that is. “i know,” he grants him, but he’s suddenly run out of things to say. it’s a phenomenon that occurs only every so often, and so he prays that lennon takes advantage of the silence, which he does, kissing him until he can no longer recall why he’d ever put it off. if he’d known it would be like this, so intensely electric, maybe he would have kissed him the second he had him alone. then again, a part of him needed lennon to initiate it this time to be sure he wasn’t just imagining the sparks between them in some a state of romanticized delusion. being pushed up against the back of lennon’s couch with his figure hovering over him is enough to make him want to pinch himself to make sure this is real, that lennon is real, but instead he’s licking the taste of his tongue off of his lips, hands wrapping behind him and crawling up his back. “yeah,” he breathes. “this is exactly what i wanted. needed,” he corrects himself almost instantly, and just as soon as he’s inching forward again lennon’s meeting him halfway, making it all too easy to obtain what he’s craving. he grips lennon a little tighter, pushing off of the back of the couch and leaning into him as their lips collide, teasing with teeth and tongue, greedily pushing his way into his mouth on the chance that this single instance has to last him an eternity. he’s vaguely aware that this could very well go on all day if lennon doesn’t put a stop to it. sebastian sure as hell doesn’t feel ready to.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

even if lennon liked to give sebastian shit for all the things he used to do as a teen, god, did he find it endearing back then. more often than not he just stared from afar and hoped to god he could get his attention somehow. instead what happened was that he pined, for years, and imagined them together. never did he imagine it would not only become real, but be much better than anything he could’ve conjured up in his head. to say he ever imagined in his adulthood he’d be in the same place, easily combing hands through sebastian’s newly very curly hair, he never imagined it. “i actually looked at you a lot,” he admitted, smiling to himself, “just because you never caught me, doesn’t mean i wasn’t.” it was true though, lennon had been one of the most shy, most timid people in the world. how that happened he’ll never know, was never the one to go out of his comfort zone to get what he wanted. ever. sure into his teens he started to crawl out of his own skin but that’s not saying it wasn’t one of the hardest things he ever did. when sebastian is moving off of him again, he pouts ever the slightest, except his oncoming speech has him – well – speechless. now that he’s basically been given permission he seemed to be a little soft locked, unable to make a move because he has no idea what to do, or what to say at all. maybe that was his issue, he was always the one to close up when faced with a hug task of doing what he wanted. what he wanted being something he felt he never quite deserved. instead he just stares at sebastian for a small second, which probably drags into minutes in the actual time frame, but it’s always felt like minutes were seconds with sebastian. without his actual knowledge, his hands have come up so they’re cupping sebastian’s neck, drawing him in closer just as his lips meet his boys forehead, pressing small kisses along his skin. it doesn’t stop there, his lips trail along his eyebrows, cheekbones, and chin, even to the tip of his nose. everywhere is covered with his mouth and finally hovers over the corner of sebastian’s lips, a smirk ghosting there. “you didn’t specify where, sweetheart,” he whispers, as if this is just some unspoken secret between them, thumbs stroking his jaw as their lips brush softly, “context is very important.”

“yeah?” sebastian queries, eyebrows raised. it makes him happy somewhere deep down that lennon used to watch him. of course, he used to watch lennon, too. but sebastian was never very subtle, always getting caught staring, or finding some reason to approach him. he’s still not very subtle, even if he likes to tell himself that he is. now that he’s laid it all on the table, he’s basically left the control in lennon’s hands, which if he’s anything like he used to be, may have not been the best move on his part. they may sit in silence all day, which it feels like they are with how long it takes lennon to actually do something. he’s about to fill the silence with more senseless chatter when lennon reaches out for his face, and sebastian lets him pull him closer. it’s agonizing, the kisses everywhere but where he wants them most, and he’s highly considering taking matters into his own hands. a soft groan escapes him, both more frustrated and more relieved than he’d been moments prior, because at least he isn’t being rejected. “this isn’t what i had in mind,” he notes, but he isn’t complaining. lennon’s lips are heaven and he’s just happy to have arrived at the pearly gates. “you know where,” he retorts, but he’s willing to play along if games are what lennon wants. he lets their lips coincide for a moment before leading his away, down lennon’s neck, professing his love over his pulse and across his collarbones. he can hardly believe that they’ve ended up here, after all this time wishing they’d cross paths but knowing himself better than to allow it to happen. this is precisely why, because he can’t hold back when it comes to lennon. “you know, this is fun,” he breathes into his skin, lennon’s cologne on his tongue. he very carefully climbs to his knees, sliding one leg between both of lennon’s and placing a hand on his thigh, squeezing gently as he balances there. “but i’ve been very patient, so i don’t really want to wait any more,” he admits, looking for some kind of unspoken permission in his gaze before his lips finally find lennon’s, letting their mouths interlock in a long awaited kiss. he’s soft with his movements, but the anticipation is there, leaving no room for breath or speech as he savours the moment and the way his entire body goes numb, save the points in which he is connected to lennon, which are on fire. 

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

it was actually a great question, how much lennon remembered from back when. as much as he’d like to think he remembers everything, he feels like his memories are a little subjective. most of the things he can recall are the good memories, the ones he holds so dear to his heart. “well, first thing i remember is that ugly scarf you wore,” he says softly, smirking to himself as he says it, “or they way you used to trip on everything, specifically air, or flat surfaces.” the fact that sebastian is now so dramatically closer doesn’t go over lennon’s head at all. rather, his heart notices it more, the stupid thing beating out of his chest. there’s always been that small tug when it came to sebastian, the want and the fucking need to always be closer, as if being close and touching wasn’t enough. even right now his instincts are screaming for closer, for more, and he stays where he is, unable to make that small step. “well, depends on the spider, best leave it alone if it’s one of those yellow critters, they eat bugs,” he says, shrugging, “really he’s protecting you.” a laugh falls out of his mouth though, at how subtle sebastian seems to think he is. as much of a great, fucking amazing, actor he is, for one second he’s never really been able to properly hide anything from lennon. it was something he always lowly appreciated because at least then if he lied, he would be able to tell. “you know, you’re such a shit liar,” and his tone sounds more endeared than anything, his fondness easily slipping out of his mouth easier than anything in the world, “you are the worst for circling around what you really want to say.” it’s so easy like this, as he sits back comfortably without really worrying about making some sort of impression. with sebastian he can be himself. doesn’t have to say anything, or be anyone else. it’s almost like they’ve been doing this for ten years, rather than being apart. it’s relaxing. “the witcher,” he tells sebastian, his hand easily raising from his stomach so it can tangle into the other boys hair, gently rubbing his scalp as he watched the back of his head, the other hand resting on his arm, “i recently started to binge it, wanted to see what all the fuss was about.” 

“oh, fuck off,” sebastian curses, accompanied by a less than lethal glare as he rolls onto his back to look up at him. “all the theater kids were doing it. it was cool,” he insists, or at least that’s what he’d convinced himself of. he’ll never try to tell anyone that he has a good sense of fashion, but he does own a few statement pieces here and there and that scarf was one of them. what statement he was trying to make with it he’s not entirely sure of. the tripping was another issue altogether, a combination of growth spurts he didn’t know how to adjust to and being stoned out of his mind at every given opportunity. honestly, it’s a miracle he even had a boyfriend in high school. “what about you? you could barely even look at me, nevermind ask me out. i pretty much had to throw myself at you,” he points out, which he is beginning to feel may be the case to this day. lennon’s never been the bold type, but he used to take timid to a whole new level. he’d found it endearing, but at some times he’d also been difficult to read and the clues he’d leave for sebastian were so subtle he’d probably missed half of them before he’d finally thrown caution to the wind. “i don’t need protection,” he scoffs, and he’s pushing himself up onto his elbows so that he can maintain proper eye contact with him as he says his next words. “you wanna know what i really want to say?” he offers, and he’s giving lennon one last opportunity to back out now, to say no. anything else is going to be taken as encouragement to continue, which he does. “i want you to kiss me. i want to remember what that’s like, because i’ve been thinking about it for ten years and it’s been near impossible to sit here with you and act like i’m thinking about anything else.” he’s quiet then, just looking at lennon as he tries to decide whether or not he should have said what he said. until he reacts it’s kind of hard for him to know, but the longer it takes him the longer sebastian has to wonder if he wants the same thing. “sorry if that’s wrong, but-- you make it hard to concentrate on anything else,” he defends, weakly. he doesn’t really have an excuse. the simple truth of it all is that he’s still in love with lennon, and he’s trying to rewind to a simpler time when life used to revolve around him and nothing else.

[sebastianhq]

lennonjames‌:

“you were never the pain in ass from what i remember,” he adds without really thinking, and of course as much as he tries to hide his nature, he can’t always help the little dirty comments that seem to always just spill out of his mouth. that stupid smirk is on his face as he settles back on the couch beside sebastian, this time much closer than he had been before, as if he could help it at all. deciding to wait for his coffee to cool before he touched it, he placed the mug on the coffee table before lazily pressing his back into the soft couch with his head laid back, legs stretched out. usually lennon is very on edge when anyone is in the same vicinity as him, always wanting to be alone rather than have any sort of company with him. it made for a very lonely life, but one he accepted because he just didn’t seem to be able to connect to a single person. with sebastian it’s different, it’s easy, he wants more. “a spider?” his interest perks up at the idea, that sebastian too doesn’t care much about killing living creatures. despite lennon eating meat (he craves bacon too much) he could never imagine harming a single thing, wanting to save all the animals, and all of that. “have you named it yet? does it have babies? does it have a safe home for the babies if it does have one? these are very important details, krabby.” the nickname he once gave sebastian slips out easy, as if it was butter spilling out of his mouth. being honest had never been an issue whenever he had been near sebastian, not one to lie anyway. it doesn’t slip passed lennon what hint sebastian is trying to get out of lennon, at all. before he even replies at all, he decides to sit up again so he can properly look at sebastian as he leaned in. if anything has changed, he’s glad sebastian never quite saying what he wants to, very obviously, is still the exact same. “i’m single, sebastian.”

“how much do you remember?” sebastian has to inquire, curious as to how much he’s blocked out over the years. most people only remember bits and pieces of their past but sebastian remembers most everything about lennon, whereas everything and everyone who came after is a blur. sebastian shuffles a bit closer to the other, letting himself bump lennon’s thighs as he resists the temptation to climb right into his lap. it’s not easy, either, what with how lennon sprawls out, long limbs and lean muscle, making sebastian wish he was still allowed to touch sebastian couldn’t care less about the spider, more preoccupied by the presence of the nickname he’d thought lennon would have long forgotten. he fights back a smile, getting the sneaking suspicion that he’s in the possession of a time machine and instead of making some monumental historical alterations, he’s instead chosen to come back to lennon, because it feels like he’s reliving his past all over again. he can recall quite clearly how it felt to fall in love with lennon, and it’s a lot like that, the old feelings all coming creeping up on him and pushing him forth towards the one person who’s to blame. “i dunno, leeroy,” he responds, voice oh so soft. “i try to ignore it as much as possible. can come over some time and check in on it, if you like. maybe escort it over to your place, since you seem to have a zoo going on here already as it is.” the tone in his voice is more fond than he could ever help, his affection for the boy sitting next to him leaking into his words. he’s trying to play it cool, though, even if he feels far from it. “i don’t think i asked,” he jokes, even though the implication was probably quite obvious. he takes the admission as permission to rearrange himself to curl up with his head on lennon’s legs, getting a little too comfortable. “what are we watching?” he asks. he’s mostly been watching lennon, so he really has no idea what’s been on television.