in this house, we slander sebastian.

She. • 21. • Reaper enjoyer. NO SEBACIEL, PLEASE. • not a 'pro', not an 'anti' - kindly keep me out of the ship discourse, tyvm.

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Here’s a long-overdue post about me and this blog.

My main is @necesitotequila.

In case you're wondering, I also have an Ao3.

• I will, as my username suggests, unapologetically shit-talk Sebastian Michaelis.

Eat grass, Seabass. 🐮

• Expect analysis, insights, shitposts, and whatever else I decide to post for my own amusement. You’re welcome.

• Reaper-focused, though I often have something to say about everyone and everything.

• This blog is not spoiler-free. Posts with spoilers will be tagged as such (“spoilers”).

• I love rare pairs and trite plot devices. Not to mention crack pairings, so expect the wackiest, most unexpected stuff to pop up from time to time.

• But remember: everything is legal and does not involve children or animals or anything downright disgusting - so I’m guessing we’re good.

• Occasionally, there will be nsfw as I also write quite a bit of smut. Do blacklist the tag if you are a minor or if such content makes you uncomfortable.

• Though only mutuals can directly message me as my settings are such, asks are always welcome as I would love to chat! :D

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Made all my BB fics anonymous until I rewrite them bc my style has changed so very much I’m now a little self-conscious of em, lol.

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Rewrote this bc I hated the old version lmaoo

[existingtm]

Undertaker ships are the best, I fear...

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

SEBKATER, ANYONE?

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Totally random, but I think Nisha would so wear Do Son by Diptyque. She’s the sort who loves perfume but easily gets headaches from many potent fragrances (aka me rip).

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Been well over a month since I finished holy hands but I wanna write a sequel alr 😭

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Sade’s Like a Tattoo gives me Nisha and Bard during/post one of their talks vibes, idk why.

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Why do I imagine Ludger to kinda resemble ‘70s Bryan Ferry, only with glasses on? lol

[cherry8maiden]

Mommy’s little chemist

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Was just remembering this piece thanks to Ludger’s anime debut 😉

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Warning: it’s smut lol

[rotarmistinnenyuri]

bringing this back like 10 years later

[dinoxnugget]

STOOOP! I STARTED TO TAKE A SHOT EVERYTIME HE SAYS THAT AND I'M DRUNK AT CH. 3!!!!

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

I just have to make him drop this line in every fic I write 😂

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

holy hands spinoff incoming 👀

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Finally updated Mortal Folly!

Haven’t written in a good while and am not sure how I did trying to tie up any loose ends, so I may revise this sometime.

Nonetheless, enjoy!

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Here’s another work part of the follyverse. You’re welcome. 😉

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Just edited mortal folly again 😭 was such a mess first time round lololol

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Vibes by Tove Lo and Joe Janiak is so Nisha and Bard, icl.

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

I can totally see Grelle writing a diss track positively destroying men she previously dated or hooked up with à la Nicki Minaj’s Barbie Dreams (if you haven’t looked it, up pls do) -

“Othello still be in my DMs, I be havin’ to duck him / ‘I used to pray for times like this’, face ass when I fuck him” 💀

“Ronnie worth a hundred milli, always buyin’ me shit / but I don’t know if the dick wet or if he cryin’ and shit” 😭

“And I woulda had Undertaker bangin’ the cake / ‘til I saw him hoppin’ out of cars dancin’ to Drake” ⚰️

(Yes, I parodied actual lyrics from the song djfjfhfhdj)

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Was listening to Nicki Minaj rn and just remembered this post. 😂

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

Still so happy I finished holy hands 😆😆😆

[sebastianmichaelisslander]

FINALLY FINISHED CH3!!!

🥳

AND, FOLKS, SHE IS DONE.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works