It’s Time.
I think this has been a long time coming. a whole year coming. I won’t lie: since posting the last of the devil skates on thin ice in september 2018, I have been having this feeling of needing to let go, which was why I moved on from vankoya to create seokeros. it didn’t work out like it used to. I wasn’t overcome with a swell of inspiration; if anything, I was pulled deeper into that nasty, incessant lack of drive for dedicating time to this blog. to writing for this fandom. while I certainly haven’t grown out of writing as I have actually been writing almost every day for the past few months, I have found myself straying further and further from this fandom. I started experiencing less and less interaction on this blog, wattpad and ao3, so I went from checking these sites every few hours to every few weeks. I stopped reading bts-centred fics. I stopped writing them altogether.
I thought I could finish a ticket to the sun before I left. for those dedicated readers of the series, I really wanted to. but deep down, I knew that while the series holds such a special place in my heart, I had fallen out of love with it at the end of 2016. I was thinking that I couldn’t find the strength to write the ending because I was sad about letting it go or because I was being lazy, when the reality is that I simply don’t want to write it. I haven’t wanted to write this series for a long time, but I’ve been holding onto it and making promises out of guilt for not finishing it. I ranted about this on my twitter, but that’s the downside of posting online that I had not anticipated when I first started: once you post an unfinished story that gains a readership, you suddenly have an obligation to see it through to the end. of course, technically, that isn’t the complete truth, but you are bound to face some guilt over having to disappoint the people who have supported you and your work. alas, this is what it has come to, and I am so sorry that I couldn’t pull through on my promises in the end...but are any of us honestly surprised? [side-eyes an oath for sinners, sillage, the orange girl, etc. etc.]
of course, I am not going to leave anyone hanging on what was meant to happen at the end of a ticket to the sun. I have posted summaries of what was meant to occur in the final chapters, alongside bits of scenes that I had already written, on both ao3 and wattpad.
thank you for loving a ticket to the sun. I’m sorry I couldn’t give it the ending you guys deserved.
all of that aside, words will never be able to express how thankful I am for the past four years. saying goodbye is never easy, especially when it seems to be for good. I will genuinely treasure this period of my life and the people who made it so wonderful forever. thank you so much to my fellow writers for always inspiring me. thank you so much to my incredible readers for supporting me and following me through all my ups and downs during these four years. I would not be pursuing my lifelong dreams of being a writer if it weren't for fan fiction, for this fandom, for you giving me so much strength and encouragement. I am truly, truly grateful. I will see you all again someday, I just know it.
take care. live happily.
all my love,
tessa.
p.s. while I will no longer be active on this blog after this post, nor on my ao3 and wattpad accounts, you can still reach me on twitter!
kpop/personal twitter: satansfierypits
anime/gaming twitter: krknm











