One trash of a person

Fics, fics and fics

[septirapdork]

i can't believe i've just found ur blog omg ur fics are so good????

AH THank you!! Well I started this blog like 1-2 days ago so you’re an early bird! :D (btw this is a side blog so don’t be confused when I follow you with my main one! I need to write that somehere hmmm)

[septirapdork]

Fic: Pastel Prince

Pairing: Egoraptor/Jacksepticeye (Arin/Seán)

Warnings: Drinking, swearing

We were such a good couple. We were like from the stories you tell to your kids when they are young; the king meets his queen and they live happily ever after - only in this case, the king met his king, or maybe prince. You know, a pastel prince with flowers in his hair. That was you, you with your blueish-green hair and smile that made my heart jump each time I saw it.

“Fuck”, I mutter to myself. I loved you, fuck I loved you a lot. I still do, to be honest. I sit in this run-down bar with no one. I’m alone and I’m chugging down as many beers as I possibly can in a short time. I will probably be piss-drunk by the end of the night, but I couldn’t care less. Love is a complicated thing, it really is. I wanted to be with you for my whole life, wanted to kiss you goodnight in some old retirement home and buy you flowers until you got allergic for getting too much of them. “I hate you.” That is not true. How could I ever hate your perfect ass? You are one of the funniest, friendliest guys I know. The prettiest pastel prince ever. I take another sip from my fourth beer and look around me. So many young couples - it is Valentine’s Day, after all. I remember the Valentine’s Day last year… You were at my apartment and we were a bit drunk, me less than now. We kissed for the hundredth time and talked about how much we loved each other and listened to Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden.

This year it is all different. You’re with your girlfriend, Suzy is with her new boyfriend. I have no one. Even Dan has a date, and Dan is the purest ladies man I have ever known. The world spins a bit around me, when I get up to go to the bathroom - only that I’m stopped by the bouncer of the place.

“Should you go home?” he asks when I almost fall down to the floor onto my face while going down literally two stairs. I try to shake my head, but the bouncer just keeps talking. “Sir, I think it’s better if you stop drinking for tonight.”

“I’m not that drunk”, I can hear myself how slurred my speech is. “I just take one more.” The bouncer takes me by the arm, walking me to the front door.

“Listen, don’t drink any more tonight. We don’t want you to get an alcohol poisoning, right?” he winks at me and loses the door behind me. I wobble to the bus stop, only to notice that the last bus had been there about fifteen minutes ago.

“Fuck!” I yell again. I’m totally not in the mood for a taxi. You always wanted to take a taxi home so nothing bad would happen. I smile shortly but stop after I remember how good your kisses used to feel on my lips.

“Good evening”, the taxi driver says, smiling like the sun. “And good Valentine’s Day!” I just sit in the back seat and look out of the window to the dark-ish city full of lights from lamps, love and couples.

“Thanks”, I mutter and don’t even look at the driver. He understands to be quiet after seeing how miserable I must look. Drunk as hell in the middle of the week, wanting to drink more and more and more. I just keep staring outside for the whole journey home. Finally on my doorstep I go inside to the house and look around me. No one is here, but most importantly, you are not here. Pastel prince, like in the Cool Patrol video - with a cape and crown and all that shit. I sniff a bit. Must be the flu, I never cry, except that I do. Sitting on the sofa in the living room I remember our last conversation.

”I love you but I can’t live like this, not in hiding.”

“I love you too, Jack. Just give me - just give me time.”

“No. I’ve waited for two years now. We can never be seen together, never can we kiss in public or even hold hands. I’m done, Arin. I’m done.”

“Please, listen to me -”

“No, you listen to me. I really want this to work, I really do; but this can’t work if you will live your whole life in the closet.”

I can feel tears roll down my cheeks as I remember how serious his face was during that conversation. I will never feel your touch again, I will never watch Sailor Moon with you in just our boxers in lazy mornings. No saturday coffee or wednesday sleepovers. My sniffles get louder until I cry like no tomorrow. I wish everything was different. I wish I could’ve been better to you, but I cannot change anything anymore. I have lost my pastel prince forever.

[septirapdork]

Fic: Drunk stories, part 1.

“Stop that, you’re drunk as fuck”, Jack looked at Arin, who took a new gulp of his bottle of beer and laughed like as if Jack had said something funny. That was not the case.

“I think you need to back down”, Arin slurred. This was the first time they were drinking alcohol together - they celebrated the fact that Jack had moved to the States to be more with his friends.

“Back down from what?” Jack had to let a smile take over his face. “I haven’t done anything, you know.”

“I don’t know either”, the brown-haired man stared at his bottle before putting it down on the floor, next to 4 empty ones. “I only know that you like to drink a looot.”

“I think you are the one drunk here”, Jack lifted his eyebrows a bit. Arin had the worst alcohol tolerance ever and that was easy to find true. At the same time Jack was cringing like crazy and finding it pretty darn cute. He was, after all, his boyfriend.

“I’m only a little intoxicated”, Arin wiggled his finger in the air after falling on the floor on his back. The blue carpet felt nice and soft under his body.

“Don’t use fancy words. It only makes the matter worse”, Jack sipped a bit from his glass of blood red wine.

After a while Arin was so drunk that Jack had to walk him to the bedroom. To be honest, the Irishman was a bit drunk himself; he just didn’t want to admit it to Arin, because boy, that would be a conversation.

“Sleep now love”, Jack smiled and kissed Arin on the forehead. Like magic, he fell asleep almost immediately. Jack sat on the edge of the bed, the whole world spinning around him. He didn’t get heavily drunk that often, but he did get nauseous very easily. ‘I need to lie down’, the man thought to himself, went next to Arin and pet his hair very softly. ‘You’re magic.’

“Jack, I can feel you with my head”, the drunk wisdoms kept coming after about an hour of cuddling.

“No shit, I’m touching your hair.”

“You should be touching me.”

“I am”, Jack didn’t get it at first. “Oh… you mean… okay, if you’re sober enough.” Arin nodded and opened his eyes. His eyes were so pretty in the dim lighting, Jack figured and felt the hard kiss on his lips when Arin pulled him closer to himself.

Arin’s hands were everywhere on Jack’s body, there wasn’t a place they hadn’t touched. Jack’s skin trembled when Arin touched his lower belly and kissed his neck like it had never been kissed before.

“God, Arin -” Jack muttered and closed his eyes, pushing himself against his boyfriend. Their duvet fell on the ground but neither of them cared enough to pull it back up. “You make me crazy.”

“I love your accent”, Arin whispered with a husky low voice and nibbled on Jack’s earlobe with his teeth. Jack let out a small moan and grabbed Arin’s ass, pulling his pants down. Arin understood the sign and threw his t-shirt on the floor with the duvet and jeans. Jack’s tongue played with Arin’s every time they kissed each other with a fire that was burning so bright.

“I love you”, Jack answered and let Arin take off the Irishman’s shirt, leaving him half-naked with only boxers on. “I love you and I want to fuck you.”

“Fuck, same”, Arin loved how Jack’s fingernails left red scratches on his back.

They kissed once more and Jack felt how Arin’s hand was on his belly button, then lowered it all so slightly, until he had reached the critical point. Jack had to bite his lip until it went white from pressure to keep him from moaning out loud.

“Arin”, he said when the American started massaging him, “please give me the blowjob of a lifetime.”

“You want that, huh?” Arin’s hand stopped and got a whimper out of Jack.

“Fuck yes.” They were both sweaty and their hair were all tangled up, but they did not care one bit. Arin started kissing Jack’s chest with a bit of teeth, going down on him slowly. Jack had a firm grip on Arin’s brown hair and let out some more moans when Arin’s lips touched the edge of his boxers. Jack looked helpless. “Please”, he whispered with a raspy voice. “Touch me.” Arin took off his pants and touched him teasingly with the tip of his tongue before taking him into his mouth and started to move up and down. “Yes please”, Jack grabbed Arin’s hair harder and with his other hand he squeezed the bedsheets.

Arin continued to move on his boyfriend and played with his tongue, before putting his other hand on Jack’s ass and grabbing it tightly. To Jack this felt so good he had to whimper and push himself against Arin’s mouth.

“Please, a bit harder”, Jack moved himself to the rhythm of Arin’s strokes. He started to feel warm and knew immediately what it meant. “I’m gonna come, Arin, I’m gonna come.” Arin started to do his magic faster, and soon Jack moaned out loud when he came into the other man’s mouth with pressure. Arin swallowed all of it and then wiped his mouth with his left arm.

“Was that good enough for you?” he smirked and rolled over next to Jack, who was still gasping for air. He nodded and pulled Arin closer, so he could feel him on his naked body.

“It was amazing”, Jack said, his heartbeat going through the roof still. “Wow.” They lied there in silence for a while, skin to skin, but then Jack looked at his boyfriend, smiling like the drunk Irishman he was. “You know what?”

“Well?” Arin asked in a drunken and tired haze.

“We need a round two. This time I will be the one in charge.”

[sweetieships]

Egobang soulmate au concept.

Okay so, the first name of your soulmate appaears on your arm when you reach a certain age. For Arin, the name ‘Leigh’ appears at age 17. Leigh is a specific name, wouldnt be too hard to find a Leigh! Years and Years go by and nothing, Arin feels a tad distraught, maybe he was defective. Maybe Leigh had died already. He lives his life normally, makig friends and connections through yt and pushes down his own sadness.

In enters Dan and Arin is immediately drawn to him. Hes charismatic, funny and becomes one of his best friends, Arin feels like he can really be himself around him, and ends up falling for him, which is not good. Dan doesnt like men and he doesnt want to ruin his relationship with his best friend, so he suffers in silence.

Little does he know, Dan is suffering as well. He hides the fact that 'Arin’ is enscribed on his arm. He likes girls. Arin cant be his soulmate. But whenever he is around him he feels like hes walking on air, and he doesnt know what to do about it.

Until the day Arin finds out Dans first name.

[septirapdork]

Fic: We Should Be Together Tonight

It was just a normal evening in America. It rained heavily and you could hear the waterdrops hit the roof. Jack sat in his chair - he had moved in a few months ago - and stared at his computer monitor intensely. He had just finished a new video, but so mething felt off. It was some new scary game with ghosts and zombies, stuff like that, but still - something about it made him cringe, and not in the good kind of way. It just felt like filming a scary video with all the rain outside was a bit of a cliché. After some thinking he sighed and closed the  recording program - Robin would have to edit it tomorrow, so Jack had to wake up pretty early the next day to send the unedited video to him.

“Eh, damn it”, Jack shrugged and decided to go to sleep after washing his face and teeth. He and Signe had broken up before Jack had moved to the USA, because of the distance - unfortunately. The man was just about to hop in bed, when someone rang his doorbell. “Who the heck?” he murmured and walked to the door, opening it with a puzzled look on his face. “Arin?”

“Hi Jack”, the all-wet man answered. “I- Can I, well… Can I sleep here tonight?”

“You drove all the way to Santa Barbara?” Jack was clearly surprised. “Why didn’t you stay at Dan and Barry’s place? Or… home?”

“I need to talk to you”, Arin seemed flustered when he came inside and put his jacket away, next to Jack’s own. “Something happened at home.”

Jack immediately started to look for a place for Arin to sleep, but then remembered he hadn’t taken any mattresses with him from Brighton.’

“Fuck”, he scratched his head, “I don’t have anywhere for you to sleep in.”

“I can sleep next to you”, Arin seemed very depressed, which made Jack question everything. From all the people in the world, being depressed was not something Arin was very often. That made Jack say yes.

“Okay. But only if you tell me what’s going on.” He was very serious and got Arin to wipe his right eye.

“Shit, dry eyes”, Arin tried to laugh a bit and went to sit on the couch. Jack followed him and sat right next to him.

“Tell me what happened”, he said quietly.  “What is wrong at home?” Arin went silent and looked at his toes like they were the most interesting thing in the world.

“We broke up.”

“What?”

“Me and Suzy. We broke up.”

Jack was so surprised he didn’t know what to say at all. What the heck? They were the perfect couple!

“We had this coming”, Arin continued after some awkward silence. “We tried to make it work many times, but this time… It just didn’t work anymore, you know? Everything was different. Silent and made us both feel bad. I still love her and she still loves me, though, that’s the reason we’re doing this.” There were tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Oh no”, Jack almost cried himself. “I’m so sorry, buddy.” They hugged for a long time and Jack tried to come up with something to say. “So what will you do now?”

“I dunno. I will probably stay at Brent’s for a while.”

“You can stay here too”, Jack made a proposition. “I live closer to the Grump Studio than Brent. It would be easier for you.”

“Thank you so much man”, Arin hugged him again. “You’re an actual Irish angel.” Jack smiled for the first time in days - stress had taken the best of him and had made him a bit sad.

“Love you, bro”, Jack said while yawning. “Should we go to sleep? You can pour out anything bad you have in mind in bed.”

“This is so straight”, Arin cracked up a joke and made his blue-haired friend laugh.

They lied next to each other in silence. After a while, Arin started opening up and just stared at the ceiling.

“I don’t think me and Suzy can see each other in a while. You know, I need some kind of a… a distraction. Or something. She always hangs out at the studio, what will I do? I can’t let the lovelies down.”

“Take your time, buddy”, Jack looked at him. “I’m sure people will understand. And besides, you guys have a lot of material pre-recorded. Just, like, put out two episodes instead of three per day. I am very sure that the lovelies can live with that for a while.”

“You’re right. Thanks, Seán.”

“Since when have you called me that?” he smiled widely and made Arin question himself. It took a while for him to answer.

“Since now”, Arin smiled back at Jack. They stared at each other for a minute or two, before Arin changed sides. “Goodnight, potato boy.”

“Night, American.”

“Is that really the best you got?” Arin chuckled.

“… Yes.”

Jack woke up at the middle of the night after seeing a nightmare about his own breakup, Arin’s misfortune must’ve brought it up in his mind. He noticed that Arin had rollled over and slept now with his head on Jack’s shoulder. The other man swallowed and tried to lightly tap Arin on the forehead, making him come even closer.

“Oh man”, Jack muttered to himself. ‘Since when has Arin been that cute?’ he noticed to be thinking. Jack closed his eyes and listened to Arin’s sleepy breathing - it made him happy in a way no one had made him since the breakup. It was weird, they had been friends for a long time, but this was different. Very, very different.

“Sleepy…” Arin said in his sleep, very quietly and incoherently.

“Shh, you sleep now”, Jack got frightened that Arin would wake up so he started to pet his hair slightly. Soon he was in very deep sleep again. “That was close”, Jack muttered. He didn’t know what was wrong and it made him feel uneasy. It was like someone had stabbed him in the heart repeatedly - it was almost like he had a crush for the first time in months. It couldn’t be that, right? Right…? Jack closed his eyes and thought of Arin in a warm, cute kind of way. He would make him coffee every morning. Every time Arin would see a nightmare, he would wake Jack up and kiss him on the cheek, thanking of him being there for him. Jack opened his eyes and felt blood rush into his face. “This is not good”, he shaked his head, but only a bit, so Arin wouldn’t wake up. This was only the start.

In the morning Arin had woken up before Jack, so Jack woke up to the smell of coffee in the room.

“What the -” he looked around him, only to find no one in the room.

“Oh no, you woke up”, he heard Arin’s voice from the door. Jack’s eyes jolted to him.

Arin smiled and made the other man feel all fuzzy inside.

“It’s hard not to wake up when you have coffee in the room”, he laughed and sat up. “By the way, where is it?” “On your night desk”, Arin pointed his finger at Jack.

“Oops.”

“You did like coffee, right?”

“I sure do”, Jack took a gulp. “No coffee for you?”

“Nah, too much caffeine for my taste, at least at the moment. I have to get my stuff from my place - I mean Suzy’s place.” Arin looked a bit sad again, which made Jack sad. He didn’t want anybody to be sad, goddammit!

“Do you think you will be okay?” Jack asked when Arin sat next to him on the bed. He shrugged, but smiled afterwards and opened his mouth.

“I’m happy if you are here for me.”

“Oh man”, Jack blushed against his will. “I -”

“You are all red.”

“Dammit! I blush far too easily”, Jack buried his face to his hands. Arin just laughed and patted his friend on the back.

“I know man, it’s hard to take compliments. But you, my Irish angel, need those a lot. You’re like the best guy in the world for letting me stay in here.” Jack just waved his hand and made Arin grab it. His hand was soft and warm, and made crush-having Jack want to jump out of the window at the very moment.

“Oh please, Brent was an option too”, he tried to sound casual, but noticed how Arin started to almost giggle.

“If I wanted to be at Brent’s, I would’ve driven there last night. I knew I could count on you so I came here instead.” Jack was the one who was flustered now and didn’t know what the heck to think of all of this. “Really, tho, the European tour made us a lot closer, I think. I’m so glad you decided to move to the States.”

“Same here”, Jack noticed what he had just said. Same here? A few days ago the move had broken up his life. He had lost Signe, he had lost a few friends back in the UK, he had lost a lot of stuff. But if it meant a new beginning, then it was all okay.

The next evening they both slept in the same bed again. Jack tried to not think how close Arin had been last night, and how his heart started racing every time he thought about it. Arin just stared at the ceiling again and made Jack question his life choices.

“I love this room”, Arin said suddenly. “It’s a bit too cold at nights, though.” Jack almost gasped, but luckily was able to hold it back.

“I agree.”

“It’s good we both sleep here then”, Arin smiled and closed his eyes, before - wait a second, he didn’t roll over, but stayed on his back. Jack’s head was full of warning sirens. ‘Do not fall for him. Do. Not. Fall for him.’ The Irish one had always known he’s bisexual, he just hadn’t talked about it to pretty much anyone. Signe was the only one who knew about it and that was it.

“True. It’s warmer that way”, he tried really hard to sound casual.

“Jack, I need to tell you something.”

“I’m all ears”, Jack smiled and looked at Arin. “What do you want to tell me?” Arin clearly thought about it for a second before he started talking.

“I think I know why it… why it didn’t work out with Suzy. I have never told about this to anyone.”

“Tell me”, Jack waited eagerly for Arin to continue his story. He knew what he wanted to hear, but this was something so very different.

“For a long time, I… I had a crush on Dan.”

“What?” Jack was so confused at that moment. At the same time he was happy, and at the same time he was… angry. Angry at himself for not noticing anything earlier. Should he tell Arin his secret too?

“Yeah. I know I always made jokes about it, but eventually I noticed they weren’t jokes anymore. I think Suzy is an exception. Like, I have always had crushes on boys but I really fell for her.”

Jack really didn’t know what to say. He wanted to tell him, he really did, but was it okay now that Arin wanted to open up? For a small silent moment he thought about it, and made his decision.

“Arin, I’m bi.”

“Really?” Arin was clearly a bit shocked. “Since when have you known this?” Jack counted with his fingers.

“About since I was twelve. You are the second person to know about this. Please don’t tell anyone.”

“Have you ever kissed a boy?” Arin suddenly payed great interest to this new information he had heard. “I have.”

“I haven’t. I have only been with girls”, Jack scratched his head. Thank God it was dark in the room, because otherwise Arin would’ve seen how bright red Jack’s face was at the moment.

“I want to give you a reward for letting me stay here”, Arin bit his lip a bit. “If it’s okay?” Jack nodded but realized then it was too late to say no. He had no idea what Arin had in mind and he had just basically said yes. Slowly Arin crawled closer to him and kissed Jack on the cheek. “There.”

“You know what?” Jack smiled and was redder than ever. “Thank you.” Silence. “I really want to kiss you right now.”

“Same here.” Silence. A slow kiss that started sweetly, like the first kiss between a young couple. They started switching kisses more quickly and after that Arin pressed his forehead against Jack’s.

“I really like kissing you.”

The next day Jack was the one who woke up first. He noticed that Arin had wrapped his arm around his waist and had a steady hold of him. Jack had to smile. If he could help Arin to get over his ex-wife, he would do that. If he was just a bandaid, that was okay too. He just wanted to kiss him again.

“Good morning”, Jack said softly.

“That isn’t the way you usually say it”, Arin smirked after he had had a good yawn. “Normally you sound much more… enthusiastic.” Jack had to laugh a bit before answering.

“Please kiss me again”, Jack then said in a quiet voice. Arin sat up and smooched one of his best friends properly. “I could do that all day, you know.”

“I know”, he smiled like never before. “I think this new beginning isn’t so bad after all. I mean, I get to be with you. I’ve, eh, I’ve had a small crush on you since the European tour. I know I have to get over Suzy, but if you are there to help me do that… I think I will be just fine.” Jack knew he was doomed to have this crush for a long, long time. After all, he had had some part of it inside his soul for some time already - Jack just had needed this to happen to realize it was there. ‘Do not fall for him? Fuck that. I will fall for him so hard I’m gonna break every bone in my body’, Jack thought to himself and kissed Arin again, more softly than ever before. His lips were perfect to kiss. He felt this feeling of… belonging. It was the best feeling in a long time.