Fvck Wit Me

[sixpenceee]

I’m a 911 operator Who Just Had The Most Terrifying Call.

by reddit user HiggsThunder

“911, what is your emergency?”

“Yeah, hi, um…This is going to sound kind of strange but there’s a man stumbling around in circles in my front yard.”

Keep reading

[astro-alien-deactivated20151010]

Cute stories signs should read :)

Aries: Careful With How You Lock Your Doors

Taurus: Aren’t You Glad?

Gemini: I’m a 911 operator Who Just Had The Most Terrifying Call

Cancer: Everybody Loves a Fat Baby

Leo: Bedtime

Virgo: The Man Who Lived Upstairs

Libra: The Baby Monitor

Scorpio:  The Girl In The Photograph

Sagittarius: I’m the Kind of Co-Worker Who Everyone Hates

Capricorn: There’s No Reason to Be Afraid

Aquarius:  Medicine

Pisces: I’m a 999 Police Emergency Dispatcher

[illkim]

Teacher: You may listen to your music quietly

Me:

[bob-belcher]

[thomrainierskies]

adventures in school

[weloveshortvideos]

Ol girl smooth forgot she was at work…

[mielparaoshun]

This made me smile so hard

[wegoingon-deactivated20181007]

[msmakeupaddict]

[sizvideos]

[titsandtwosugars]

do you ever see someone in public and think “you look very… Tumblr”

[icanmakeyoufeelperfect]

“Boyfriend” Photoshoot (2012) “What Do You Mean?” Photoshoot (2015)

[cosmicwizdom]

I can relate to this…

[cigartate]

Suddenly you’re 21 and you’re screaming along in the car to all the songs you listened to when you were sad in middle school and everything is different but everything is good.

(via flipsidepride808)

[cosmicwizdom]

I can relate to this…

[blossomfully]

We were always going to say goodbye, weren’t we?” “Yeah. I think so.“ “I loved you though. I loved you so much.” A pause. “I know. I know. “I loved you too.”

S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #185 (via blossomfully)

[thursday]

[snowpawshaw]

FINALLY IT’S ON TUMBLR THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE THIS

[tobiasxva-deactivated20170810]

The only decent part of that movie

[thecrybabbles-deactivated201605]

Whoa, just slow down there buddy. That movie is solid gold.

[lovefortv]

[clayaire-deactivated20210206]

this is genius