Iâve been thinking a lot about this lately, and I want to know if anyone else is in the same boat. I see so many posts about health issues, pre-diabetes, high blood pressure, heart problems, linked to gaining weight, but how many of us are just not checking on any of that? How many of us are just gaining and living, ignoring the signs and the risks?
Iâm 20, and gaining has become a lifestyle for me. Iâm talking fast food, takeout, soda after soda, itâs what fuels me. Itâs not just about eating, itâs about feeling my body change. The heaviness in my stomach after a huge meal, the way my clothes fit tighter every week, the softness of my skin stretching as I grow. And letâs not forget the chest pains that come after stuffing myself with greasy food. Sometimes itâs a sharp throb, like my heart is protesting the extra weight, but I push it down. Or the way Iâm out of breath just walking up the stairs, my chest tightening, my legs feeling heavier with each step. Itâs getting harder to breathe after even the smallest exertion, but I tell myself itâs just part of the ride.
Iâve had blood tests, and yeah, the numbers donât lie. My cholesterolâs up, my blood sugarâs creeping higher, but my doctor brushes it off. One time, I got weird results, and they assumed I wasnât fasting before the test when I actually was. Itâs like my health just doesnât matter to anyone, so why should it matter to me? It feels easier to ignore it all, to focus on the feeling of getting fatter, the high that comes from getting softer and rounder with each passing day.
But hereâs the truth, the physical signs are there. I know Iâm not healthy. Iâm literally out of breath after a few minutes of walking, my heart aches sometimes after eating, and I feel like Iâm sinking into my own body. But even with all that, I donât want to stop. The idea of giving up this lifestyle, of losing the thrill of seeing myself get bigger, doesnât seem worth it. I love the way my body feels, heavy, soft, and a little out of control.
So, I guess Iâm asking, how many of us are just ignoring these physical signs and continuing down this path? I get that itâs not healthy, but the ride feels so damn good. I canât be the only one here who feels like the gain is worth it, even if the consequences are starting to show. Anyone else dealing with the reality of the body changing, knowing the risks are there, but not sure if they care enough to stop?
